Ok so I thought I would give you all an update..yesterday was a good food day until the evening. It was so hot (100 degrees) and we all were outside most of the afternoon/evening. Anyhow I ate really well all day but when i got to the event and started working and moving about I got really hungry and tired. The company hosting was only selling homemade hamburgers/fries and soda. I stuck with water but I did eat a burger and some fries. I think I only went over my calorie goal for the day by 500 calories. Anyhow it made a difference in my weigh in this morning but I am not going to sweat it as I had to eat last night or I would have passed out.

Anyhow that is not the point of this post, the point is I am finding I can only concentrate on one "project" in my life at a time. I am a single Mom and I work full time but I like to have hobbies on the side also. Since I started eating healthier and exercising about a month ago I find that I can't concentrate on anything else, I can only focus on this right now.

I was committed to the event last night but I think for the sake of my sanity and goals right now that I am not going to volunteer for anymore events until I reach my goal. It is too easy for me to get derailed.

So how do you deal with derailment because of other events/things in your life you are committed to and also how do you avoid getting derailed by the unhealthy eating habits of your friends and co-workers???

I've had that problem so often in the past -- my diet would last until something more interesting came along (usually within a month)-- that I was determined to find ways to deal with it this time. For me, it turned out to be a couple of things that would keep drawing me back to the plan: a goal to read a book that supports my healthy lifestyle for every pound I want to lose
and posting in the Beck Diet Solution thread on 3FC every day.

That's working, but I also have done what you suggest, let the healthy lifestyle be my main "hobby" for now.

If I do get unfocused for a day or two, my practices of reading and posting will get me back on quickly. I think it's more important to have strategies for getting back on track quickly than it is to attempt to never get derailed. In the long run, consistency and persistence count, not perfection.

This is an important topic for me, too. I once lost about 90 pounds, but I was obsessive about it. I weighed myself daily, I marveled in inches lost and what clothes fit and didn't, I talked about it all the time to everybody. Everything I read was about weight loss. It's good to be a former fat girl, but that couldn't be my entire identity. As a result, I burned out and ended up gaining all the weight I'd lost, plus 15 pounds.

I'm now striving to incorporate slow changes, and being successful while also focusing on other areas of my life.

At any rate, don't beat yourself up about a 500-calorie overage. You can recover from that much easier than you can from a five-day sugar binge!

This sentence stood out to me because you put in words what I was trying to say and it's not just a diet, it's all of my hobbies. I will start something and then something else comes along that seems more interesting and I lose focus on the old and start with the new. Now that is fine for a hobby but for weight loss that means if you lose focus you gain weight (at least that has been my experience)



I know what you mean about being obsessive because everything I do, I become obsessed with it and I find myself already heading down that road with this new lifestyle I have chosen

I'd say, you can't give up on outside events completely. So, you have to have a plan in mind for those times when you are tired, hot, hungry, and the only food choices aren't ideal.

Here's a strategy for the homemade burger, fries, and soda situation.

(1) Drink water. From all the heat, you may be dehydrated and not know it. This also helps fill your stomach. Diet soda is obviously a better choice than regular, but water is even better.
(2) Skip the fries. Really.
(3) Get lots of lettuce and tomato with the burger if they are offered. No need to put them all ON the burger--have some on the side like a small salad. Onion too, if you like onion.
(4) No cheese. This can make a big difference in almost anything.
(5) Mustard only--no mayo. A small amount of ketchup.
(6) If you are still hungry after this, see if you can get a second burger patty with no bun and more vegetables.

As you get used to thinking along these lines, you'll find that events aren't as stressful and as likely to put you so many calories over. You can approach food choices and make decisions about what to have and how much, and what to skip. What other people choose to eat isn't your concern anymore.

And of course, you can also cut down on those events. Realistically, though, life happens...

Jay

I don't like Mayo so that wasn't an issue and I had onions, lettuce and mater on it, plus I ate like 8 fries. Now of course I could have ditched the bun but I was so busy checking people into the event I didn't even think about it. I am not sweating (no pun intended ) the burger as that was the first un-healthy thing I had eaten in 23 days.. as she pats herself on the back.. and still no soda or fast food (i.e fast food restauraunts) ..

Losing it,

I hear where you are coming from, but here is something to think about. If a healthy lifestyle is your focus "for now" . . . what happens when you reach goal and move on to a new hobby?

Urgh... I've had this issue for the past two and a half months. I'd be good on the dieting... and then all of the sudden... *BAM* I'm traveling again. *BAM* I have family get-togethers. *BAM* I have a ton of studying to do for various things. *BAM* I have to travel halfway around the world. *BAM* I have to help move into my parents house....

And... when I get back to the US... I have to deal with settling myself in at my grandparents', finding a job, a barn, starting school, etc. URGH... It would be so much easier if I was stuck somewhere for a year... something where I could do some other stuff... but only focus on one real "project": weight loss. It'd make things so much easier...

But... it's not life. That's what I keep trying to tell myself.

I haven't got it down yet... but I'm trying... good luck... and know that you're not alone in this!

losing it 2010, i can relate to what you are saying. i think it can be a normal response when we are working on something big for that to become a main focus. it's certainly been the case for me when there is something i want to do that is important to me.

i'm not currently reading a lot of books on the subject, though i have read some in the past that i think have influenced me and that i am keeping in mind now.

and i do not discuss my efforts with anyone in real life. my work is primarily inside myself. for me, these issues are addictions, and therefore require a lot of my energy. and i think that is ok. so it's not a main focus outwardly to people i know. but it is it my focus for myself.

i decided to become active here because it was a way for me to (try to) be part of a community where i could (hopefully) give and receive support. and to post my accountability, which i knew was going to be key for me. so this is the only outward thing that i am doing. the rest of it is inside myself.

as for going places and doing things that can make it hard for me to keep at what i am trying to do, yes i do go to them. i don't want to miss out on my life while i am working on this. but yes, they have proven to be very difficult for me. i try to plan ahead, eat something before i go, and bring a snack with me. though sometimes i fail at doing that.

but generally speaking, i decided that, for me at least, it would be ok, and maybe not even only ok but necessary, to make this a focus. it's an important part of my life and affects me in so many ways, most importantly my health, but many other ways as well. and something that important to me i think is worth it. though sometimes i struggle even with remembering that it's worth it, so far i end up remembering that it is.

hang in there. you can do this.

I always eat before I go to an eating event or if I think I will be hungry before I get home. When I'm traveling, whenever possible I go to a store and buy some fat free milk, yogurt and fruit. That seems to help me a lot.

I have wondered this also


Maybe this is why what i am doing now is working as I have been on vacation already this year and so I am traveling or getting out as much these days

In previous weight loss attempts, this has been my downfall. I'd get so into a school paper or a project or whatever and then abandon my goal to lose weight. However, this time, I don't think I can NOT make weight loss a top priority. I'm so sick of this weight and how my body image is holding me back, that it's my main focus.

I've dealt with this most of my life. It seemed to me, that to be successful to any degree with weight loss, I had to give up virtually everything else in my life. I could (but barely) hold a job or go to school and lose weight, but anything "extra" had to go. Dating, going out with friends, hobbies, reading..... was mostly out of the question. Any source of stress seemed to make the weight loss impossible - and I'm not just talking the big stuff like a death in the family. Even minor day-to-day stuff like dealing with a cold, or bills, or having an argument... could throw me off.

Giving up everything of value in your life, gets tiresome, really fast.


I've learned that I have to make health a priority (and that includes weight loss), but when I make weight loss my only priority it doesn't work very well. Giving up everything else is just too high a price ot pay.

Giving up the all-or-nothing mentality is a lot harder than I thought it would be, and finding a good balance is even harder. It's not something I can say I've mastered, but I'm learnning.

I can't make weight loss my whole life, but it's got to be in the top few priorities. It's too easy to drop the ball.