The thing is that guys have now idea how to correlate a scale number with a woman's appearance. They are usually waaaaay off. For some reason, they'll have it in their heads that 120 is a good number. Or 110. Or 130. Whatever. And if you look good, then they assume you weight this random number they have in their head.
Man, that is sooooo true! They really just have no idea. Plus, the only thing they hear is the media going on about how so and so famous person is 120 lb, etc. 120 lb seems to be the magic number, so they probably think, "if she's slim she's 120 lb. If she's heavy, she's 300 lb". And nothing in between!!
My telling the husband was a BIG part of this. I remember shortly after I started, a month maybe, taking a deep breath and blurting it out. Gawd it was hard to do!
My weight gain was something we never talked about as it happened - so for me to admit it to him was pretty freeing. At the same time it also helped me to stick to my plan, no turning back.
He didn't really react either way upon my telling him, but was more involved afterward with supporting my changing ways.
For the first almost 7 years of our marriage, DH had no idea how much I weighed. Then we got the Wii Fit. Every time I got on he saw my weight and my obese little Mii, but he never said anything (even though I weighed more than him) and was super supportive of my weight loss.
He's been gone for several months now (Navy) and I weigh less than him now, and my Mii is now just overweight, not obese. So I'll be excited for him to see that (and me, 20+ lbs lighter since he last saw me) when he gets back.
I didn't tell my husband how much I weigh because I weigh more than him. Sigh. It kills me. I'm 8 inches shorter and 25 lbs heavier- was 35, but still. I think he might have figured it out because I mentioned a goal weight because I told him I was not going for the ideal BMI as I don't think I can maintain it. A few days later I accidentally said how many pounds I was shooting to lose. Hopefully he didn't do the math, he can't remember what he had for lunch most days, but who knows. Whats done is done. It's just a number to keep us accountable.
LOL! I have never told my husband what I weigh. I will tell him when I get to my goal weight, I might tell him, but for now, the only people that need to know are me, myself and I. LOL and sometimes I don't even want to know.
Last edited by Beachplum; 01-31-2009 at 06:00 PM.
Reason: gramatical error
I never told my husband how much I weighed until I hit around 200 lbs. When I was pregnant I got up to 279 and I was so horrified by this number that I wouldn't tell anyone, not even my husband and he asked me outright one day. I told him to guess and he guessed 240, and I said no, more, but I wouldn't tell him how much. There was a point where I weighed more than everyone in my entire family. I hated it so much, it was so difficult to be that heavy, it interfered with every part of my life. So glad it's behind me and I'm keepin' on until I'm back to normal again!
Wow, I didn't expect such a response and so much in it I really needed to hear. You are so right. I agree that guys have it in their heads that a woman, no matter her height/body type should weigh considerably less than them - in the ballpark that you all gave. So, maybe when he heard the number that was close to his weight he was thinking, "Damn, she could probably take me!" LOL
Seriously, it feels SO good to be part of a group again doing this. Thank you all so much for sharing! I feel SO much better now! to each of you.
I'm not telling my husband until I weight less than him--which I used too. I think he would be shocked!! I never had much of a problem until after having 3 beautiful boys. I should be at about 145-150, now at an all time high 191!!! shocking I know. I can hardly believe it myself. Just getting started on losing-it's time.
Most men have no idea what a woman really weighs .
Hey it's NOT just guys! Most PEOPLE can't guess someone's weight right! Why do you think there is that age old carnival game of "Guess Your Weight?"
The trick is to add 20% to what you think they weigh! Most people UNDER estimate someone's weight.
At my heaviest I weighed 345 and every once in a while someone would ask me how much I weigh and I would always say "GUESS"
Almost ALWAYS they would say way under what I really weighed.
It's not a guy or girl thing it's a people thing!
One thing I learned a LONNNGGG time ago and that is I never tell someone how much I think they weigh OR how old I think they are! It almost NEVER comes out pretty!
And I agree the look of surprise is probably because he didn't know it was that much because in his eyes you look great!
I remember talking to my husband about losing weight and he asked me how much I weighed. I didn't want to tell him but finally did and he acted shocked and was like no way you weigh that much!! I was horribly upset. Thinking back now I guess it might have been good that I didn't look like I weighed that much to him but eh lol.
Now he knows for sure though because last week he was at the doctors with me and after I was weighed she told me right in front of him how much lol....
I find it hard to admit the number to anyone though
i never told my hubby how much i weighed. mostly because he never asked! he is a big guy and is a little insecure about it (even though he'd never admit he is) so it's just not something we talk about. i've been yo-yoing up and down because of babies and such so since i've been doing so well i told him one night a while ago that i was finally back at the 140's (i was PROUD dammit!!) and he didn't say a WORD. no congrats or anything. and it stung a little. but i think in a weird way even he is a little jealous of my success because he is heavy. so i didn't take it to heart and just let it go. i'm not going to let anybody make me feel any less successful and he has ways of saying "you're really hot" with out any words, you know?
Every time I got on he saw my weight and my obese little Mii, but he never said anything (even though I weighed more than him) and was super supportive of my weight loss.
to each of you.
