It can be hard to be positive, but I try to steer clear of blatently calling myself "fat" or other hurtful things; it's too easy to let that carry over into other areas in my life. It's that whole self-fulfilling prophecy thing.
I can still be pretty negative though. There's a line in a song by a band called ThreeBrain that I often use when I want something that's really bad for me but I shouldn't have it: "Cry yourself a greasy river." It's negatively motivating, but not directly hurtful to myself.
Cousin... I have to ask, do you have a past of eating disorders?
I'm only asking because you sound just like I did when I starved myself... and you're average weight right now, your starting weight was average, and your goal weight is the lowest possible number you could hit without being underweight.
PS: if that is you in your avatar pic, you're gorgeous...
Somedays I need to give myself a pep talk (i.e. if I am feeling like this is taking too long or if I am feeling badly over a slip up)
Sometimes I just need to be my own drill seargant (i.e. this morning at 5:09 am when I said "move it, get your out of bed and put your running shoes on and get moving"
I'm pretty sure from 5-5:09 I had tried the "think of how good you'll feel" and "so close now, keeeeep going" and all the peppy crap. If I had been anyone else I would have beaten the out of me for being so dang perky at 5 am.
It pretty much takes a pep talk to get myself out of bed every morning. But I'm not really negative or positive, I'm just sort of laying there in bed saying "Okay, I'm going get up now. Okay, now, I'm going to get up now. Now I really am going to get up. Now, up now..." It goes on for a while before I actually get up.
I also give myself pep talks around exercise, usually trying to encourage myself to keep it up or move faster or that I can do it. Sometimes I ask myself if Jessica Alba or Gwen Stefani would quit now (I like the idea of celebrities having to work as hard as I do (or harder) to stay in shape; it's motivating to me).
But I don't really give myself talks around food. When I am thinking about going off-plan, I do try to remind myself that this is going to delay me reaching my goal and I try to consciously affirm that I am willing to accept that delay in order to have this momentary gratification. I'm definitely better at this on some days than others, but it's something I'm workin gon and I do sometimes decide that the momentary gratification isn't worth it (and then other times I decide that it is worth it, but at least I've made a conscious decision about it).
I give myself positive pep talks about everything I'm struggling with, not just my health. I don't berate myself because 1. I think it's mentally unhealthy; 2. I don't call other people I care about names or belittle them, so why would I do it to myself? and 3. it doesn't actually motivate me. It just makes me feel bad.
There are plenty of people who have been mean to me in the past and I'm sure there will be others in the future. That's just life. But I don't choose to beat myself up anymore. I used to be an expert at doing that, but then I figured out that I'm the only person I can count on to be kind to me.
I'm mostly negative, but sometimes positive. I agree with others who have posted that the negative thoughts just tend to make you backslide. For example, I've flubbed up bigtime on my diet this week (too many occassions to dine out). I am so disgusted with myself, and I got up this morning wanting to do penance by eating 1000 calories a day until I lose at least 10 lbs. But the saner part of me realizes that this will just set me up for a binge-starve cycle and make things worse.
I usually give myself negative pep-talks, such as: "You've spent a lifetime being chubby and doing this, so STOP IT."
I found it motivates me so much more than peppy positive-type speak because that kind feels fake.
I usually delve into my deepest feeling to motivate.
I just don't like *me*, its not so much about my body its about my life etc. I do have a copious eating disorder history, but I have no motivation at all to change and I just wanna hang around here.
I just don't like *me*, its not so much about my body its about my life etc. I do have a copious eating disorder history, but I have no motivation at all to change and I just wanna hang around here.
This seems so unhealthy and counterproductive, in opposition to a healthy life. Reading those words makes me sad. Please seek professional help because we care about you but can't help you like a team of medical professionals could.
Sometimes I just need to be my own drill seargant (i.e. this morning at 5:09 am when I said "move it, get your out of bed and put your running shoes on and get moving"
Hee! I definitely do that too. I've even given myself a (gentle!) smack on my bootie to get in it gear. But, I don't see that as being negative. More like... tough love. You're not calling yourself mean names or beating yourself up, which is what I classify as negative.