Red - part of weight loss for so many of us is that we need to dind a wailing wall that is NOT shoving food into our gobs. So wail away. You are right, humans suck. BUT there are some pretty cool exceptions to the rule. Just remember tho, I know this sounds cruel, but sometimes the kindest thing you can do for an animal that is suffering is put them down. Yes you might be able to fix them and nurse them back to health in a long time, but does the animal need to be frustrated and in pain for that time really? I don't know, I suppose this attitude comes from growing up on a farm and coming home from my first day of school to find my pet lamb being resucitated by my very worried father (it had decided stones were a good thing to eat!) who was more upset about it dying than me - I think I asked if we could then have lamb chops for tea! oops.. and also that our evil neighbours had fed 1080 poison to my kitten and she had to be put down. It's just part of life and yes there are people that willingly neglect their pets and/or dump them and presume they can fend for themselves when they can't, but you have to look after you too Red. As you say, you are in debt and all the money you spend on your animals is part of that. I'm not saying don't do it, but perhaps you need to draw a line where caring for animals stops and caring for Red starts. I hope this makes sense and doesn't seem cruel and heartless.
Cheers
Tiffany
P.s perhaps today you should be called BUFFY the Slayer

Hi guys,

Long day - just got in. Had one client and vacation planning scheduled today but ended up with emergency clients all day long...no vacation planning. I'm so bad for doing this stuff at the last minute!

Jacque - I'm so sorry for what you and your friend are going through! I will keep you in my thoughts and we are all here for you if and when you want to talk.

Red - I'm glad you pulled things strong today! It's so hard to start some days!! I agree with you that humans can reach all new lows - several times a day!! Animals can love unconditionally - I wish we could learn more from them!! I'm renaming my lab - yellow shadow. She goes EVERYWHERE I go. Right now she's sittting at my feet with her head in my lap beggine me for attention.

NBK - good luck with the doc. Get that B12 straight!!!! I know you know all the things that go wacky when it does...for one thing every single fibro patient I work with is lacking it!! I take it every single day - I'm scared if I don't I'll end up on shots and I'd rather be tired than give myself shots (I can say that now I'd do the shots if I needed to ) Good luck. I hope things get straight for you soon!

Crime girl - I hope your day turned out a great as it sounded. How great of bf to take you in and come get you. I know what you mean about parking too!! I went to the night program so I had a 10 minute window..that if I got there in the window I'd get good parking...if not I was walking a LONG ways at night, alone! Glad you got to work out too! Keep up the great work..I'm with you about the cheats steam rolling on you That's why I consider bellpeppers cheating...If I don't - I'll eat them every day and then the sugar too I have to convince myself it's all equally bad in order to stay straight.

Stormy - Girl -have you tried the shorts lately? I bet they're looking good! How is your weather doing now? Is it getting any warmer. Your trip home sounded rough!! I'm glad you made it in one piece

okay - question...short term goal - to hit my weight from 2 years ago. 133. I'm at 136 today. Today, also, I wore for the first time since BF and I met, I wore the shirt that I met him in. A semi tight little gap t'shirt. White with black sleeves. I went to my massage therapist's house - we went to school together and Bf and I are friends with her and her husband. When I walked in her husband looked at me and said "oh my god Meri! We just saw you three weeks ago - look at you!" I was soooo excited!! Massage therapist gave me the "you're so skinny I hate you" speach and was really cool about it. Before I left her husband wanted my food list - man if he only knew Anyway, it really made me feel great!!! for some reason people don't comment on the way I look ever. I could be bleeding from the head and I don't think anyone would mention it. Not sure why. So hardly anyone has commented on my weight loss. It's frustrating to work so hard and NO ONE NOTICES. This was a wonderful gift - and greatly needed!!

Okay - what i won't do. Bikini is the top of the list...but right now I CAN'T because while I'm at a lower weight, boobs have not changed AT ALL. I hang out of all the tops - really badly. The rest of me is much smaller so I look like they're fake right now.

okay better spend some QT with BF before I leave town!!

Righty ho - LGH CONGRATULATIONS on wearing your "new" old t-shirt and getting the compliments! See the battle with the rice cookie demon has paid off! he he. Yay. I'm stoked that you had a lovely comment. As for the no bikini cos your boobs are too big! lol.. do you KNOW how many women would kill to have that "problem".. I think you'll find the BF doesn't see it as a problem either! I know guys that have bought their gf's bikinis with bottoms the right size, but the top too small purely to get the spillage effect..immature I know, but then what guy isn't! I buy bikini tops for 'D' cups, even though I'm a C.. as you get a bit more support and no spillage! You could try that maybe. I hope you had some awesome "QT with the BF" too. ;-)

Stormy - LGH is right. Try those shorts on! I'm sure they look great. I wear shorts and we are the same size. If you feel a little self conscious, then slap on some fake tan. It's amazing how much you can hide with a tan! he he he How's school going? I was a bit confused about you flying home after a week.. did it close down due to the snow storm? Or do you have sections at school for some of the time and then do work at home for the rest?

Damn it's hot today... Hopefully I can go for a swim tonight, but ONLY if I go to the gym and do my pump class first. Swimming will be my non-food reward for being good today.

Well I hope everyone else is having a good day/night/sleep.
Ciao bella
Tiff

The doctor was really friendly today. She said i looked pretty in my outfit (my special skirt the BF got me to say thanks for organising our last holiday and a yellow singlet top i got in Australia).. and then when I showed her this bruise on my leg that hasn't gone after 9 months, she said I had lovely legs and the bruise would probably always be there which was a pity.. So that's better than last time when she told me I was fat and HAD to lose weight. Oooh ooh and she said I had toned up.. (sorry for the boast)

On the B12 front, I had a blood test so will know in a couple of days. If it goes down again, I am writing to the stupid people at the thalasseamia institute who CLAIM that my form of the disorder has no effects and inform them that once again I have low b12 for no reason other than my budget blood. last time I wrote to them asking for advice or treatments and prevention, they claimed that B12 levels have nothing to do with the disorder. Mind you these are the people who claim that it has nothing to do with permanent aneamia and low oxygen content in my blood. Grrr.. ok so just so I don't have the form where you have to have constant transfusions and chelation therapy doesn't mean I'm not a sufferer! (sorry for rant here..)

But then the dr gave me the usual BMI talk and how 75kg needs to be my magic number and that I should never get to 80 again in my life. The funny thing was she showed me on the xenical chart, and for a second there I thought she was going to offer it to me! lol...

OK ok ok another post from me.. I know I am a lame *** with no life (actually I just have heaps of work that is driving me nuts, it's all drawings and they are sooo boring!)

anyway i wanted to say, a VERY pleasant unexpected bonus from having lost a bit of weight is not having to spend 20 mins with the nurse trying to find a vein she can take blood from! I have always had shy veins, but when I was at my HW, it got really ridiculous trying to find them. Today the nurse got it first try! yay!!

That is all

NBK - I'll be crossing my fingers for you and your blood test. hope you get some answers! Great comment from the doc too I'm still waiting for a positive one from mine. As for the swim suit tops - I'm a 32 DDD.....tough to find supportive ones for me they'll go down when I've lost ALL other weight - until then I'll look like I paid good money for them

Night all

Hi everyone!
Sorry I haven't been on- today is my crazy day and I have little time to do much. I did manage to work out 30 min with Maya and walk my dog a half a mile though. I am starting to look at that as necessary stress relief so I am making it a priority. Starting to enjoy the effects- less stress, better sleep, and more focus in class. YAAA HOOO!

Jacque- I am glad to see you back and I am also sorry to hear about your friend. If you need to talk I am also just a PM or email away. Jump on when you can but we understand if it is not often. I will keep you and your friend in my prayers.

Little grasshopper- DDD, huh? I know how you feel! The only thing is I have the body to make them look in proportion.
I am glad to hear you feel my pain with the parking situation. I think the worst part is that they charge us automatically in our tuition for parking then they don't provide enough parking for everyone. Makes me crazy!
Did I read right and you have a new dog? I just love the affection and unconditional love they can provide. If Charlie wasn't already named when we got him we probably would have named him therapy.
I am so glad people are noticing your hard work and weight loss!! Congrats! That has got to make you feel good!!

NBK- Great job not getting carried away with eating even though bf is there to distract you. Sounds like you had a lot of fun and your tone changes when he comes home.
Thanks for the encouragement on my struggle to exercise. I would love to have a stair climbing challenge with you. I ran up the stairs in the business building (5 floors) twice tonight. Hurt like ****.
I have to ask you- what in sam hill are "porno" jeans?? Is there something you are not telling us.
Your doctor adventure sounds like it turned out good- docs don't lie about whether you look like you have lost so you must be doing great! I am glad they managed to get blood without hurting you looking for veins. Man- I hate giving blood.

Red- Sorry you started off feeling a little blue this morning. I am glad you rallied and I hope it ends up to be a great day! Don't worry about coming on and "wailing"- yes it is a weight loss board but I think we all genuinely care about more than just how weight loss is going. You can complain, yell, cry, laugh etc all you want. We are here for you. I am also only a PM or email away so remember you are not alone- use us if you need us.
Hang in there with the dog- I know it is hard. Like I said before I would exchange some people I know for a dog or cat. Like someone said - you have a big heart and a nurturing soul so I know it hard for you. It will get better and unfortunately what will be - will be.

Okay folks- I need some sleep- I go to work tomorrow and I have another full day. I am going to get up and workout with Maya- go to work- come home and talk to you guys- then get some reading and studying done! The busier I am the less I hunger for food I dont need.

Tomorrow is "what in the heck have I been eating day". How about if we tell what kind of healthy rewards we use. Is there a particular food you get if you follow your plan that is still healthy?? What are some nonfood ways we can reward our hard work??

Question of the day is:
What was your favorite outdoor activity as a kid? bike riding? playing sports? hiking? jogging? What made you race outside??

Have a wonderful night everyone!
Sweet dreams full of ...wait not this again...ok...just sweat...er...I mean sweet dreams!

Good morning!

NBK-I was also wondering what porno jeans were? I go to school everyother weekend. I am finishing up my doctor of physical therapy. I usually drive about 7 and a half hours but my car is in the shop so I have to fly several times. As far as shorts, since it is winter I only wear them in class b/c we have to when we perform gait analysis and so on. I will start getting some sun in March and I tan very easy. So I plan on looking good in them soon! Hope your blood tests turn out good. Also congrats are your veins being located easily. Little successes add up. By the way my father in law was on Zenical and that stuff sounds nasty.

GH, I am not sure why people do not comment on weight loss. Maybe some people are just not observant. I always make sure I comment when someone loses weight. I know they appreciate it. I have had a couple of people comment on my weight loss. I have had others ask what I am doing not hey you look good. My hubby told me yesterday that my butt is looking good. I do not know how he could tell that with my scrubs on but he asked if I had bought a smaller pair. I do not want to hear about your complaints about boobs!!! I can be 50 pounds heavier and none of the fat goes to the boobs. It's amazing. On the other hand my sister had to have a breast reduction. I guess she got them all. I told her to ask the doc if I could just jump on a gurney next to her and maybe they could just suck hers into mine. Even after the reduction hers are still so much bigger than mine. Oh well...

CG, you sounded much better after yesterday than in previous weeks of school. You also worked out. Wow! You are doing great. I am so tired of school work. Yesterday I spent 7 hours doing school work and I am not even close to being done with what I have to do.

Red, how are you doing? Did you go out and conquer the world? How is the eating and working out doing? Positive thoughts, right???

My favorite outdoor activity as a kid was sailing and biking. I still love both! Howeve, I have not sailed in years.

As far as food, I always reward myself with chocolate on my cheat day. Either icecream, cookies, brownies, or a real candy bar. I look forward to this all week. If I get a craving during the week I try to tell myself that I am only so many days away from getting to eat it. So far I have not given myself a non food reward. I do plan on getting new clothes when I hit my goal weight. Even though I have that size in my closet I still want a couple of new things. I think I may get myself a new bathing suit but I have stretch marks now so I do not know. I guess I could just wear shorts with them.

Hey Ladies,
It's in my being absent that I've truely learned how much support you ladies have been to me! Thank You I am hoping to be back and active in a few days, although it's tough right now...

My friend has Cystic Fibrosis, so her entire life she's been told "You probably won't make it to next year." But next year kept coming, and at 24 she's done much with her life that she didn't think she'd be able to! Including graduate from college and get married, so she's very lucky to have had such a wonderful life! She has spent the last 2 months in the hospital fighting the flu, so we have seen it "coming" but that doesn't make it any easier... So if I just disappear again, you know where I am! I'll be back and active ASAP.

On another note, lucky for me...hitting the gym has proved to be a successful theraputic outlet I'm so proud of myself for that! Unfortunatly my eating habits have been HORRID!! So hopefully soon I can get this all in check and get back to being a loser

Well, Jacque - I'm very sorry. You're right - knowing it's coming does REALLY prepare you. We're here for you - anytime!! Good for you, for going to the gym and finding that outlet!

Stormy - I'll let you know when I have my reduction and you can share the room with me Growing up my grandmother would call and the first question she would ask my mom was how big my boobs are! (I got them from her side of the family - my entire family here is flat!) I can also remember singing in a wedding and my cousin leans over to my brother (both grooms men) and asks him if I've had a boob job! Right in the middle of the wedding!! I'd gladly get rid of them - but I Know I'm complaining to the wrong person

Crime girl - I hope you lose your weight in equally all over My wish for you!!

okay guys, I've got to get back to work. Reports to do before next client.

I am mostly on plan with eating right now - but am intentionally cheating a bit. I can't be completely "clean" when I get there or my stomach will revolt the first time I have grandma's food I am taking somethings with me - snack foods and things for the flight and late night munchies I'd rather take it than snack on junk.

My favorite thing as a kid was swinging as high as I could and singing at the TOP OF MY LUNGS! The two combined were heaven to me!

Good Morning you Wonderful Losers! (he he I love being able to say that without getting punched)

Well last night I didn't go to pump, it was just way too hot, So after a smoked chicken salad (and garlic bread eeek) BF and I went for a walk down the beach and then for a swim.. he complained cos the water was colder than earlier on in the day when he had been surfing, but for me it was bliss! I love being in the water, it's just so relaxing! I wore a singlet down, and when we were walking back, i put his t-shirt on as I HATE things clinging to my stomach, it just makes it look worse.. so anyway we got to the point on our walk where I was going to have to swap back, but first I said he should put on my singlet! Kind of as a joke, and secondly as I hadn't dried off as much as I hope, to stretch it a bit. Well when he put it on it was TIGHT as.. and he was amazed cos he thought we were the same size...and it is loosish on me so that was kind of neat! but the best part was that despite him constantly going on about chocolate when we were at the supermarket later on that night, I didn't cave and so I had no night time treat as such! I'm really happy. And I dealt with talking to my mum with out having to resort to chocolate to cheer me up!

CG, Stormy - My porno jeans, well they aren't really porno, just at the moment. They are these really cool designer jeans by a surf label that is notorious for small sizings. I got them in a size 12, 1 size above my goal, but I got the tape measure out and they match a size 10 more.. anyway they're the ones I can do up with an overhang at the moment, and there is a bit of a camel toe thing happening, hence "porno". They have paint splashes and grafitti on them. I can't wait to wear them in public!!

Jacque - I'm so happy to hear that your friend has done so much. I had a good friend who also had cystic fibrosis. She died when we were all 21. She had done so much also - my first memory of her is showing everyone at school her feeding plug in her stomach! She turned out to be a brilliant photographer. You know, sometimes knowing it's coming does make it easier, but the waiting is torture. I will remember you and your friend in my thoughts. Congratulations on going to the GYM! Even if you are eating horribly you wont be doing as much damage as if you weren't exercising as well. We're proud of you!

Stormy - Pfft about stretch marks. I find a bit of baby oil or lotion on mine has made them fade (after a hot shower works best) and no one else really notices them. I was with the bf for about 6 months before he noticed them.. we're both pretty observant, and I'm not a lights off kind of girl! he he. He just asked me if I'd come off my bike badly as a kid. So don't worry about the lines in your bikini... seriously. People just don't notice, and if they do, chances are because they are JEALOUS!

CG- way to go on making the exercise a priority! yeah yeah yeah! Walking the dog and playing with maya.. maybe if we cave and get an xbox/PS2 i'll get that game and see what you're raving about! Stairs, yesterday I did 4 trips up and down 1 flight of stairs, plus a mammoth effort of 6 flights. (I don't know if I should count the 1 flight trips, the ladies toilet is on another floor, so I have to take them if I need to go!) I'm really impressed tho that you are dealing with being busy at school and home so well. It's great! and You sound so much happier!!

I also hear you ladies on the carparking, we had that problem at my school! The worst part was, there were places along the streets that didn't have lines marked out and you would get people who through inconsiderate parking could waste up to 3 car spaces! Used to drive me NUTS! I used to leave nasty notes of peoples windscreens telling them to get parking lessons. he he

LGH - You are right, some people would pay a ridiculous amount of money for those puppies! he he.. oh well.. It's funny though, people with large breasts want smaller ones and often people with smaller ones want large ones! I think it would be cool if you could "dial up" a la stepford wives, the size breasts you want depending on your outfit and your mood. Now that would be cool!! Except you would have to have special elastic skin... hmmm still it would be cheaper than implants or reductions..

Ok.. well since I have gone back to my original philosophy, I have been remarkably on plan. My favourite "healthy-ish" food treat would be cheese hmmm lovely cheese. I also reward myself with things like Shopping in my wardrobe for clothes i used to fit, didn't and now do! and when I get to 68kg or 30% body fat, I'm going to get my belly button pierced.. just cos I can! he he.

My favourite thing when I was a kid.. well when we had the farm, it was calling the horses to the fence, jumping on their back and making them take me for a ride (no bridle or anything, so really i sat while they grazed).. um playing int he hay paddock or playing cowboys with my brother. when we were in town, it was going to my riding school or riding on my bike! but I must admit, I have always loved reading and more often than not would just curl up in the sun and read.

Heh guys, I'm here. Just haven't had time (and not really felt like it) to write. I'm OK though, thanks for asking stormy.

Hey Red.. smile! I hope you are really truely ok. I'm thinking of you!