Hi Ladies and thank you all for the lovely thoughts. Things will not get better and I have to get him to the vet today, but he will not come home. Sorry to drop that one on you. He has lost all power to the hind quarters. When he is up he can walk - slowly - but once he falls over, he can no longer get up. There is no quality of life left and he can't be left alone. That's not saying that he doesn't try hard, but when he tries to get up he just slides backwards, sometimes under furniture and you have to go drag him out and stand him up. For all that, he does not appear to be in pain, but his eyes are telling - he is ready to go. DS wants to be there with me at the end. So it will be late in the afternoon. We will just be quietly at home today doing as much as we can together. I now believe that this is the reason why I have not been good at looking for a job in the last three weeks. We have had this time together.

Well thats my dose of disaster for today. I'm sorry to dump this on you. I don't think I can write much more today.

Happy, hope that resume does the job for you. Best wishes to Mum. Glad it wasn't as bad as feared but yes it just gets harder as they get older. You'll be looking for somewhere to rehouse her now. It seems that she won't be able to look after herself much longer.

Mel and linus, thank you so much for thinking of me and my wee man. Friends like you, I need today. Best go get myself together and try to salvage something out of this day.

I am so sorry for you Joy. I know that he has been a good companion - will never forget how he gave you that bedraggled flower when he sensed you were having the blues. Still makes it hard to deal with. Our thoughts of comfort going out to you.

Oooh thats what I get for not logging on yesterday...bad news from Joy about beloved Shad. I am so so sorry to hear that news and send you a great long [[[[[[[[HUG]]]]]]]]. I can't imagine now what life would be like without Holly, even though she is a pain in the neck sometimes!
Still no sign of Shaker....
I watched a wonderful programme yesterday...I know I know...whaen I should have been logged on!!!....about the New Zealand Prime Minister, who took an American reporter on a few days away to show off her country. They climbed up a mountain, met the Moaries at the original village beginning with W...er was it Waikiki or something?....absailed into the "sink caves"...and ended up on the beach where her parents live and where she grew up. The scenery was fantastic...oh and they kayacked (sp?) across a lake where there were lots of seals being ultra-friendly and very very cute It was a good hour...pity I missed the very beginning. I'll have to look out for a repeat. I think the programme was originally made in 2002.
Mel....is it true? Is it true? Is the delivery of the new chair finally in sight? How are you doing at the moment...your ills behaving themselves at present, I do pray. I must say I think you are amazing, you do so much all over the place and I can only gaze in wonderous awe!!
Linus...how are you today?Hope Scotland is basking in the sunshine like Suffolk is this morning. Is mum's car all fixed now? That sort of behaviour makes me so cross...
Happy! What on earth was mother thinking of..1/2 a lemon pie! Anyway I am releived it was possibly nothing more serious than bad indigestion but scary all the same.Poor mum! But I don't understand...wht was dad in the waiting room? Wasn't he allowed in mum's room too...might have kept his daughters in order.... you sure the cylinder was not hydrogen...?
Roseblush....what are you doing up before the sun??? I think I'd need more than coffee if I was up that early!

Thanks Teel. Yes 'tis done. My companion of 15 years is no more. His ashes will be brought back from the crematorium tomorrow or the next day and he can join Gunbo our other dog under the big poinciana tree where they loved to sit in the shade in the summer. Gunbo went to sleep 4 years ago.

I've seen that program you spoke about a couple of times now. Helen Clairk is certainly a PM with attitude. Probably the most down to earth person we have had in control. She doesn't put up with much nonsense from this side of the Tasman I can tell you. I don't think that American reporter could believe his luck at the beginning of the program.

Well I think I should go to bed now. It's been a pretty awful day. Funnily enough today I have had 2 people ring me about contract work in Sydney. It's not coming up before July but if I am still around doing nothing at that point I'll probably give it a go. Tomorrow will be strange - no dog to walk with down to the park. Guess I'll just get up early and go to the gym instead. I will get used to it.

Hello everyone,
Dear Shad, I am so sorry for your loss. There is a special place that the love of our pets fill in our hearts and lives. What a great friend you were given and many years of devotion to each other. Our pets give us such joy and blessings. We never stop loving them or missing them. My thoughts are with you and may comfort be found in the tender memories. Sending prayers.
My weekend with my son chad and his girlfriend amanda went too fast and they had to leave early yesterday so it was not enough time. Chad was able to golf in a tournament with his friend on sat. and had a good time showing amanda around our little burb. He starts his helicopter repelling today. My other son jesse is returing from a week trip on Lake Powell with friends today, I spoke with him last night and he is safely on his way......
It has just been pouring rain on and off all week and my little plants are drowning on the deck, so yesterday I moved some closer tothe house to help them dry out. The moisture has been good but a little more sun would be welcomed also. I still have a bit more planting to do when it isn't quite so muddy.
I am going out of town on thursday for a few days but on the way up North I have a dr.'s appt. I am not looking forward to that stop but it is necessary. I get worse about those female appt.'s instead of better in my old age....
Will try to check in sometime during the weekend I should have access to a computer a few times. Take Good Care everyone and keep up the good work.
Nae

Shad~ I just posted and then deleted. I never saw this last page. Last night when I checked, mine ended with linus yesterday. Needless to say I am so sorry for you. I know how much you two loved each other. It will be nice under the tree in familiar territory and with friends.
All my hugs and love while you get used to the idea. It is funny that the offers are now coming in. Life works in mysterious ways sometimes. ((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))
Please never apologize for "dumping" here. I hate that word anyway! I call it sharing yourself with friends. Didn't I just go on a rant the other day with a pity party to boot! Hope you feel better soon too! Loveya!

Happy~ Sorry about Mom and Hope she is feeling better. Chest pains are hard to tell what is going on. I know from experience. It turned out to be spasms of the upper chestwall! You never saw anyone so relieved! Hope she is feeling much better today. How goes the work thing? and the website? Do tell!

Linus~ Hows the house cleaning? Break any record yet for spiffiest house on the block? Hope the back is holding up!!

Kirsty~ Sounded like a good program. So much sex and violence on TV that I despair at times what to watch!! I use my videos and DVD's now so much that Jen wonders why I have Cable TV! Hope you too are holding up!!

Nae~ Glad the visit went well! Nice to have the kids back even for a short spell I guess! I can always send Jen if you get lonely! Good luck with the visit. I just told the mammogram girl that some day I'm gonna say WTF and stop making appts!!!
She was horrified! Fingers are crossed for you.

I am feeling drained again today. Not sure why. Retirement leavves me too much time to feel all the aches and pains that I ignored when on my "rounds". Must be a happy medium here somewhere. I need to go back to the clinic and check on my rate of regression also. i know it's creeping up on me faster than I want to realize. I better go and eat and co journalling. Getting a rather late start again. Maybe I need to start setting an alarm! Have a good one!!

to the shads
You were taken from us much to soon my beautiful friend He was very special to us and he will always be remembered in our hearts.

Still shedding tears for you
How do I let go?
The pain is deep
The loss profound
Because I loved you so.

The house is feeling empty
My heart emptier still
I am still shedding tears for you
I guess I always will.

There is a large hole in my heart once filled with your unconditional love, and it aches every day no matter what I do.


There is a large hole in my heart for which I fear there is no cure, but only to be filled forever by the memory of you.

Goodbye My Friend

Linus - Kirsty, that is beautiful. I can't reply now. It has reduced me to tears again. Back later

didnt mean to make you cry but it made me cry so i should have realised sorry
kirsty

Geez, I'm crying too...

Please don't cry anymore for us. And do not feel sorry Linus. It is a gorgeous poem and I love for the thought.

Hi all you girls are making me cry. It is so nice to know that other people understand such a deep loss when it comes to animals. I am so glad you have such great friends Shad....hope each day is a little better.
Nae

Hiya all, just got back from the gym and had a long sweaty workout. I'm obviously not functioning on all six because after my shower I find that I have clothes to wear but no shoes. Oh well could have been worse. Could have been only shoes and no clothes at all.
I bought some lunch at the food court in the mall, but for all the flavour there was in it and the substance I may as well have come home and found something OP for less than half the price and twice the taste. Phooey. Not to worry, it's done. I've now bundled up all the towels we used for the dogs and cats. Just left one for Sunday the cat as she doesn't get bathed too often much to her relief and have cleared out the linen cupboard. Anything not used in the last year or so is going out. I'll take them to the vet this afternoon and he can see what he can use. Tomorrow after gym the rest can go to the RSPCA Animal Shelter where they can keep or sell as they choose. Life must go on. I think Sunday is missing dear old dog somewhat, she has been looking a bit puzzled but maybe that is because she still has food in her plate - it has not been pinched because she didn't eat fast enough!
There's plenty to do around the joint so I can't just sit around and mope - it won't get me anywhere anyway. So I'm off to finish the cleaning and tidying of the linen cupboard and I will catch up with the doings of my favourite on-line friends later. Thank you, you wonderful people.

shad i promise faithfully that the next time you come to scotland ill let you take my nutter out for a nice long walk and beleive you me youll be on the first plane back to austrailia i gave all my old dogs stuff to the pdsa which is a charity that provides help for people that cant afford vet bills or should i say the pets of people that cannot afford vet bills they treat the animal for a donation by the way where are your shoes inquiring minds want to know
kirsty

I left my shoes sitting on the end of the bed under a pile of washing. I still had the gym shoes as I was wearing them at the time. Silly me.

I'll take you up on the offer of the walk. Two nutters together in glorious Edinburgh. We could have fun.