[mrsmoore]

Hello everyone.
I am new to this site and hoping to get some support during my weight loss journey. I haven't been heavy my whole life. I have been very small most of my life. When I was younger I was teased by my grandpa, who called me fat. He thought that it was funny because I was skinny, but I started to perceive myself as heavier than I was. I always saw a different picture than what everyone else did.
I maintained a weight of 105 and got down to 98 pounds at one point. No matter what I always saw myself as heavy. Fast forward and I met my husband who made me feel beautiful and happy. I hovered around 105-108 for a year than we got pregnant.
I gained and gained. Ballooning to 165 when I was ready to give birth. I worked out by walking everywhere every day. I got down to 135 and got back into a size 8 not ideal for me but much better than maternity pants. As soon as I moved out of the center of town I started to gain the weight back. It crept up so slow that I didnt notice. All of a sudden I was 151 and my diet yo-yo journey began. Having a toddler made it hard to care about myself as much as I should. I gained ten pounds and in 3 months gained another 10. I was actually at 178 at my highest and I about puked. My husband is 6'2" and weighs about 195 and who is incredible shape. I couldn't believe how close I was in weight to him and his was a foot taller.
I am now ready and focused. At the moment I am down to 168 and proud to say that I am really watching what I put in my mouth. I know that changing what I eat is not just an over night decision but a life long choice to be healthy. I yearn to be a healthy person who can feel good. I no longer crave the size double 00 jeans. I would be very satisfied with a size 4, which isn't really small if you consider that I'm 5'2". I want to be a healthy size and the weight isn't as important as how I feel and look. I have learned that the scale is just a tool to see progress but not the only tool in my journey. I will post my body fat reading as soon as I get it done next week so as to be held accountable for my losses each month. I hope to make a few friends that can help me along this journey, because its hard to do alone.