[Tallica]

I'm not sure if this goes here, but If it doesn't then lock it, move it, whatever you do.

I've been trying to diet for a while, and it usually always starts with a lot of motivation.But now, I've been trying to start one for a while, but I've lost all motivation.If I see some junk food, then I'll tell myself "I'm not that fat, you won't gain weight!" and eat it.But I hate my body any other time.And it's not just junk food, it happens with whatever I'm craving.I do have little self control, but I'm trying to work on that.Plus when I get home at around 3 pm, I have a buffet.xD But I guess that's another story.
I guess what I'm saying is that after a lot of failures I'm loosing motivation and confidence to try to get healthy and junk food clouds what little motivation I have.

Does the fact I have no motivation mean I should just stop trying?Could it mean I'm not trying to lose weight because I want to and that I don't /mean/ it?Am I too desperate?Trying to hard? I think I'm gaining weight from all I've been eating and that makes me feel like all of my previous hard work is gone.
It's killing my self esteem too.

I feel like I just can't do it.

And advice or even support would be great

[serendipity907]

I can definitely relate to being short of motivation, particularly during these winter months, I find myself getting really unmotivated and stuck in ruts.

I think one of the best pieces of advice I've seen is just keep trying.
You can't fail if you keep picking yourself up when you make a mistake. Don't look at it like you're starting from square 1 each time, this is an ongoing journey.

[luckymommy]

Hi Tallica,

I'm not sure if I have any good advice, but I do understand how you feel and I could share what has been working for me this time.

It took me many attempts at weight loss to finally get to this point and I"m still trying and consider myself a work in progress...I make my share of mistakes, but this time, something *is* different.

When I fall off the wagon, I pick myself back up as fast as I can. I keep my eye on my goal and am almost obsessed with getting there. Sometimes, we cannot find the motivation and there are so many days that I'm not motivated..especially when it seems to go soooo slowly. What keeps me going is commitment and consistency. I think most people don't succeed with their diets because they expect the weight to fall off their bodies very quickly, even though it may have taken years to put on.

A major thing that helps me is exercise. I need to do it every day. If I don't, it's SO MUCH harder for me to stay on track. Do you workout? Sometimes, we eat because we're frustrated, thirsty, sad, anxious...etc....if you can pinpoint what is bothering you and channel your emotions into something positive (like working out), you will feel so much more in control!

Mostly, what has really helped has been keeping track of my calories. Yes, it sounds very tedious, but it has become second nature. I have tried so many different diets, but I never knew if I was having too much or too little foods. Calorie counting (for me) takes out the guesswork. I know I have a calorie budget to work with and I know that if I don't stick to it, I just won't lose weight and I might gain. I use a program called Lose It for the iTouch, but there are many online calorie trackers. I've heard people like Sprakpeople? I think that's what it's called.

So, I hope that wasn't to preachy. I really hope you will find a way to get control over your eating. Remember, when you eat something you crave, something you know you shouldn't have, you're really depriving yourself of the life/body that you want. Avoiding the food is only deprivation if you think you aren't worth more....you gotta believe that you are worth more than the junk. You wouldn't put terrible fuel in your car, so why do it to your body? Instead of thinking fat/thin with food, maybe think wholesome/junky to help you make decisions when you are tempted.

Oh, I almost forgot: don't go anywhere without always having some food in your purse or car. If you do and you get hungry, you will make a bad decision. I always have either a fruit, a bag of veggies or a granola bar in my bag.

I hope you will find your way.....you could start today or look back at this time a year from now and wish you had. You can do this!!! Just take small steps and go for it!

[Amarillo19]

Something that might help is Beck Diet For Life. I know exactly how you feel. Believe me, I've started a diet more times than I care to remember. By day 4 I've lost motivation. But then I just feel worse about myself than before. Recently I've gotten into the Beck book and I can see how it can help. There's a large Beck group here at 3FC. Check them out. Just don't quit.

[Summer2010]

"don't go anywhere without always having some food in your purse or car." I AGREE!

And keep trying! I have been trying since October...if you fall off the wagon, pick yourself up and start again the next day...GL>

[ThinkinThin]

DON'T GIVE UP! We're all going through similar feelings and it's SOOO frustrating, but it's a journey and every valley and mountain is just part of the ride. In the end, it's only food and only fat. It's not the end of the world. I just saw a "10 minute rule" on another thread; someone said when they want to binge, they wait 10 minutes (if they can) and usually they've gone onto something else and the craving has passed. Maybe that will work. I'm going to try it myself. Good luck to you.

[steph84106]

I really have to take my own advice but I can definitely say that when you push past the lack of motivation or desire to get healthy, it usually passes. Kind of like withdrawals. It's miserable, it's defeating, it's depressing... but once it's over, it's over. You can enjoy your transformation then. This IS the hard part for me.
I always start so excited and motivated and almost manic / obsessive about the journey. Then reality hits and I want to have the things that make me happy again. It takes time for me to realize that it's super short term happiness I'm getting with food and what I need is to be happy and proud of myself for Everything I am and everything I do the right way, you know?

Good luck and it will get easier for you!

[giselley]

Right now I am stuck in the "winter doldrums" and I have very little motivation. It is too cold still to go outside, and I can't wait for spring. Every time I look out the window I see awful white stuff on the ground and I don't want to go anywhere or do anything. My weight is not really going anywhere-- not down at least. I do know that I am now lighter than I was last year. That is motivation for not pushing a cake in my pie-hole.

[three herring]

I think we all tend to over analyze the whole self image, weight and diet thing. I don't rely on motivation, because that is so elusive. I rely instead on thinking that simple routine discipline is what I need every day of my life.

I work on putting food back where it belongs, at three specific meal times. I try to give it as much importance as brushing my teeth or getting a project done, but not more or less. I like routine, knowing that I am taking care of my needs on a consistent basis.

Instead of trying to diet when you don't feel ready, what about harnessing eating into a routine? Pick however many times a day you prefer to eat, eat what you like and make the routine the important thing to get done. Then, when the time feels right, work on making those meals a bit healthier, perhaps even one meal at a time. Problem eating for me always came when I ate whenever I felt like it.

Remember, you don't have to have a weight problem to make healthy eating choices. You could do it just to feel better.

[Gold32]

You know what motivated me to start? This place. Honestly, I read stories about what other women have accomplished and I'm like, "I can do that!" So, I dropped sugar, and I was completely amazed at how little I could eat and still feel full. After that, I realized I CAN do it.

Then I read stories about women who've had bad days. I mean, way worse days than mine, and they are still losing weight. So when I fall off the band wagon myself, I'm not as discouraged.

If you haven't done so already, read through some of the success stories in the goal section. They're inspiring.