Hi -
I'm new to your site. I had maintained my loss for 6 months. After that anniversary day I stopped walking for exercise and I've now slowly gained back 20........ my red letter number to get back on track.
So, I looked on the web for some inspiration and support to challenge myself to do the work.
When I was 258 lbs. I asked myself ... "Why didn't I stop at 20? at 40? or even at 50? pounds overweight.... I never had an answer for that question at the time. I am working now on the answer to that question. I am hoping to find some answers and motivation at the 20 lb mark rather than the 50 lb mark.
The reply I can give now as to why didn't I stop at 15 lbs is:
I've become accustomed to not walking or doing any extra exercise. It's only been 2 months since my anniversary, but I can already feel the pull to not exercise is stronger than the pull to exercise. I have to admit to myself that being lazy is indeed fun at times.
Also, I do have to admit that it is fun to eat chips and ice cream again. I have been limiting quantities and had only two overeating episodes one each when I brought back the foods into my dietary regime. That was before my anniversary date, and I had gained 10-12 lbs but got back on track and lost it for my anniversary calendar date... and then the next day I felt burned out and haven't been exercising.
I'm in size 10 pants - up from 8's but I can't feel that as negative. I had been in size 24-25 pants and 3X tops. I feel that keeping 80 lbs off is a success. But I also don't want to stay at this size. I do prefer my look and my body's feel at 140-145 and in the size 8's again.
I am hoping to find some motivation both within myself and from a group. I did put my pedometer back on today to see what my number is and just how lazy I've gotten. In the past it has motivated me to keep moving.
Thank you to anyone who has read all this. I just need to open up about these pent up feelings of how to get motivated again. This is a much smaller task, yet I don't seem to have any energy left for it.
Hi Pyxie Welcome to 3FC and the Maintainers' Forum!
I think you've come to a great place for support and motivation. I'm not sure what the collective number of pounds lost here or years that they've stayed lost, but although none of us claim to know all the answers, most of us have figured out a few tricks that work.
If you take some time a read through the threads, you'll find a common theme: that the way most of us maintain is by doing exactly the same thing that we did to lose the weight in the first place It's no longer a "diet" but a lifetsyle. You've discovered the hard way that walking or some other form of exercise has to be part of your lifetsyle. Most of us have become dedicated exercisers and learn to love it, or at least love the feeling when we're done This is a pretty diverse group here. We all lost the weight using different "plans", but all pretty much agree that it boils down to eat less and move more. For life
Hi, Pyxie! I just joined this site last month and I must say it has a lot of motivational ideas. I lost 65 pounds a few years ago and have let it creep back on in small increments. I am now back up in the low 200's and hate it! It is so easy to say stop yourself now, but the energy is hard to find. I would recommend maybe trying some weight training or finding a workout class where you could have some fun. Or, maybe find a workout buddy who will hold you responsible for your walking. I had two great buddies who sometimes forced me to walk, even when I really didn't want to. But, now they are not available and I find it much harder to put on my shoes and get out that door every day. Congrats on your wonderful accomplishment. Size 8 or even size 10 is my goal! Be proud of what you have done!
ay yi yi, pyxie!!! i just posted some thoughts on the other thread.. i don't want to repeat myself.
you can do thisl... find what works. after all, do you REALLY want to buy clothes in every size as your weight creeps up??? i certainly don't, i don't like shopping to begin with, and to feel eferything tight again and getting tighter week after week.
Pyxie!!!! Reading your story is like reading something I wrote in my journal two years ago. Now fast-forward 2 years to today. I've gained 110 of 120 hard-lost pounds back and am struggling to lose it all over again. If you're anything like me there is something inside you right now saying, "That won't happen to me. After all that work, I won't gain it all back again." But that voice is lying to you. It can happen before you realize it and it goes back on much faster and easier than it went on the first time around. Sure it’s fun in its own weird way, but the results are anything but fun. It's sneaky too. First it's 10 or 20 pounds, then you're out of your skinniest clothes and slowly going up in sizes. It took me a year to lose it in the first place, 6 months of maintenance where I was the happiest I've ever been, then a year and a half to gain almost all of it back.
I would give anything to be in your position today and be given the chance to make different decisions knowing what I know now. So many of us plan and strategize every aspect of lives down to the tiniest detail to lose weight, but don't give nearly enough thought to what will keep us on track when the constant compliments on our new look slow down, when we no longer have another 10 pound loss milestone to reach to motivate us to “be good”, and when the thrill of victory over a life-long battle fades. Now what?
That's the motivation piece that no one can answer but you. I hope you find your answer soon! Trust me-- you don't want to be back here at square one again... It’s miserable!
Thank you everyone. I know I am in a precarious place, and I didn't want to fall off in the wrong direction....... so that's why I looked for help on the web this morning.
After posting my honest and heartfelt concerns - which by the way, I haven't dared mention to anyone - I felt energized to not let the weight gain happen. I do want to be thin and I have enjoyed wearing my size 8's this summer. I have done some soul searching today before I checked back to the forum.
I went out and bought a new pedometer to mark my re-dedication to my goals. I got a very nice little one for $5. My other was much bigger and I didn't like the bulge under my shirts so I quit wearing it. I did get my 10,000 steps in today. I even did half hour on my treadmill tonight.
I seemed to have slipped back into the auto-pilot for weight control again. But I'm not sure how secure it is. I still feel shaky in my resolve tho.
I have lost 80 lbs in the past, gained it back plus 25 more. I started out back in my 20's to loose 20 lbs. Now in my 50's I know full well that I can gain weight on auto-pilot as well as lose weight on auto-pilot after so many years of so many different diets and what I thought was lifestyle changes too. My eating is ok for the most part, I did stop exercising cuz of the heat and then cuz lazy was easy.
I do intend to keep posting and stay the course til I get back in my maintenance zone.... and then to stay on the forum to keep my focus.
Thank you again everyone for your honest answers. I have some new things to think about tonight and tomorrow.
oh pyxie... i'm so impressed!!! and proud of you! we all have the same issues., and after yesterday, when i took myself very strictly in hand, i've already lost a couple of pounds [let's not go into why i gain 5 pounds overnight and then lose it in large chunks if i simply do what i'm supposed to!!!]
you've done the really hard work - deciding to stop the madness.
So many of us plan and strategize every aspect of lives down to the tiniest detail to lose weight, but don't give nearly enough thought to what will keep us on track when the constant compliments on our new look slow down, when we no longer have another 10 pound loss milestone to reach to motivate us to “be good”, and when the thrill of victory over a life-long battle fades. Now what?
That’s what Maintainers is all about.
Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and experiences. None of us loses weight with the intent of regaining it … BUT it’s something that we constantly need to be aware of so that we can guard against it. None of us is ever going to be in a place where we can say – oh, it’s never going to happen to me. So it’s really instructional to hear from people like Pyxie and SkinnyBoPeep who have had this happen and are in the process of turning it around.
I’ve been thinking about how the group of us here really lives in uncharted territory much of the time. If you ask “experts,” they’ll tell you that 95% of dieters regain the weight that they lose. End of story. So they don’t even bother with the other 5% of us. Very few experts study maintenance (one exception being the National Weight Control Registry) and hardly anyone seems to be able to guide us in how to keep the weight off. So we’re forced to learn to be the maintenance experts ourselves through a process of trial and error and sharing what works and what doesn’t. And of course we’re adding in the element of group support, which I, for one, think is priceless.
What have we -- the 3FC Maintainers -- discovered about maintenance? I'm going to list a few ideas off the top of my head. Please add your ideas – there’s no way that I’m going to be able to think of them all. Hey, we can put together the Maintainers Manifesto!
Mel hit on the first two:
Exercise is key: it’s going to be impossible to keep the weight off for life without it. Like Mel says, learn to love it or at least love the results. Find some way to move your body every day. The NWCR stats show that successful maintainers exercise for an average of an hour every day.
Maintenance doesn’t look any different than losing: the only way to keep the weight off is to simply keep doing what you did to lose the weight in the first place. The “diet” is never over – it’s a cliché but oh so true that this has to become a lifestyle in order to keep the weight off.
We – the formerly fat - are different: we can’t afford to fall into the trap of thinking that just because we may look like other people now that we can live like they do. Our bodies and minds are different than those of people who never were overweight and obese. We probably will always have to eat fewer calories and exercise more than normal people.
Motivation comes and goes: some days are easy and some are SO hard. The energy and focus seems to peak and ebb. But if it’s truly a lifestyle, you can go through the motions even if your heart’s not really in it. If we create well-worn paths of diet and exercise for ourselves, then we follow them even when we’re not 100% focused because they become the paths of least resistance.
You can’t ever let up: there can be planned vacations and special meals off but for most of us, it’s every day for the rest of our lives.
Keep on top of your weight: you have to find a way to monitor where you are, whether it’s weighing yourself regularly or taking your measurements or seeing how your clothes fit. The power of denial about our weight is tremendous – we need a reality check about where we are on a regular basis.
Do it YOUR way: figure out a way to do this for the rest of your life. It doesn’t matter what other people think or do – it’s your life. No one needs to give you permission to do whatever is necessary to keep the weight off. As Funniegrrl says: whatever works.
This is a banner day for profound posts by Meg......Meg you're going to wear out my printer! Isn't it amazing how life just gives you what you need if you let it? A million thanks for just the motivation I needed today and for the second leg of my journey.
I recently had a seven pound regain over approximately a one year period of time. I watched it, at first it was three pounds, then five pounds. I got serious and lost it, then let up and regained it. I sort of watched in morbid fascination. I blamed it on retaining fluid, I blamed it on different scales. And then, one day I put on a favorite pair of jeans, and they were TIGHT. Maybe they shrunk in the dryer. I started really listening to myself and realized I was rationalizing away the signals that would keep me from a serious regain. No more rationalizing! I will NEVER go back to where I was. Never.
Everyone has to draw their own "line in the sand". Mine used to be 5 lb, but somehow I had stretched it to 10 lb. More rationalization.
For me, for definite, a line in the sand would be buying a larger size of clothing. I understand that manufacturers size differently, but I am talking about a larger size of clothing in an item I already own. I refuse. It isn't going to happen. I'll maintain or I'll go nekkid!
I know, after a lifetime of obesity, how quickly 10 lb turns into 30 lb turns into 100 lb for me.
Draw your line in the and and don't budge over it. Go back to basics. Do what works, and keep on doing it.
For me, for definite, a line in the sand would be buying a larger size of clothing. I understand that manufacturers size differently, but I am talking about a larger size of clothing in an item I already own. I refuse. It isn't going to happen. I'll maintain or I'll go nekkid!
Amen sistah'! That's the goal I've set for myself too. I will never justify buying a size larger. If my jeans get too tight, it will be time to kick in the exercise and watch what I eat a little more sharply until they fit comfortably again.