Hello --

I have been lurking for awhile -- introduced myself on the South Beach forum awhile ago, but since then have found that I'm doing better by getting info from the weight lifting/bodybuilding sites rather than following one kind of "diet". Now I am just watching calories, eating as "clean" as possible, and working out.

That said, I wanted to ask you veterans a question about "cheat days":

Did you find, over the course of time, that it was helpful to you to have a "cheat day"? If so, how often (i.e. like on BFL one day/week), and how much did you indulge? (500 calories, 1000 calories...?)

Now that you are on maintenance, do you follow that same method, or do you do it differently?

Thanks for your input!

Luanne

Luanne: I am back to losing, but for me to do it successfully I have to incorporate treats in a responsible fashion. Not everyday and I make it worth my while. I'll probably eat up to 1000 calories more on a treat day (and that's probably a liberal estimate, I treat myself with a meal of whatever I want with dessert, but I probably eat a little less the rest of the day and lately I have been leaving more on my plate.. I do this once a week). I also refuse to call it cheating (since to me that's referring to it as something negative and sneaky) while treating is just a compliment to my usual eating.

I just can't have an all-out cheat day, since it could awaken Miss. Binge Eater who has been sleeping for the last little while. So I plan responsibly and it's been working thus far.

Cheers!

Ali

I have occasional planned treat meals or treats ( a dessert, a glass of wine, a portion of stuffing), but don't have "cheat" or free days. I'd never be able to maintain with them, and as Ali said, it would re-awaken Miss Binge Eater. Also, rich, fatty, sugary, and particulaly salty foods make me feel quite sick at this point.

Mel

I didn't do any cheat days during the year that I was losing, though I did have a few planned treats for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and a special occasion or two. Why? First was momentum - I was finally losing and didn't want to do anything to stall my progress; second, the aforementioned Binge Monster was sleeping and I was afraid to wake him; third, I wanted to forget what certain foods taste like (the longer I go without eating something, the less I crave it ).

Now that I'm maintaining, I still haven't done a whole cheat day, though I do plan in special occasions when I'll eat what I want for one meal. Then I'm right back on track that same day. And I always make sure to get to the gym on those days. I can't imagine taking a whole day off from careful eating - I don't know if that's good or bad, but it's what works for me.

Honestly, I don't usually feel very good about cheat meals, either physically or mentally. The 'treats' rarely taste as good as I imagined. And like Mel said, my body doesn't react to well to sugary, salty, fatty foods any more so I usually end up zonking out in a carb coma. Mentally - I hate seeing the scale go up the next day (which it inevitably will), plus sometimes I have a tough time getting back on track. For me, the longer I stay on plan, the easier it is. So planned cheats are still fairly far between - maybe once every two months or so?

But that's just me - a lot of people do better with weekly free days or planned cheat meals. It's all about knowing yourself and what works for you.

Hi Luanne....I did the free day thing when I was on BFL, but it didnt work for me. Im an addict....so giving me a day to eat what I pleased was like a free for all. So I quit doing that!!! I went back to no free days, or treats etc. Ive been ok for quite a while now, so about 3 weeks ago I started taking sunday nights from 9-10 pm (during Desperate Housewives) lol as a free time. I'll sit and have a glass of wine and maybe some popcorn. Thats about it, I only have an hour, and Im pretty engrossed during that hour to concentrate on what Im going to eat. So far its working quite well for me.

But like the others have said, you have to know yourself and what works and what doesnt. Its pretty much trial and error until you learn what will trigger the sugar monsters.

Robin

In addition to what the others said ... I hate hate hate the term "cheat" when it comes to food. It has such ugly, negative connotations. Like the others, I may have times when I relax the rules a little, but if I'm going to do it I want it to be worthwhile and enjoyable, and not laden with guilt. I think using that term also implies that there is perfection, and there is everything else, and that's a very black/white way to look at the world that can be damaging. It encourages that bad/good mentality, whereas the goal should be more inclusive than exclusive.

I know I'm practically alone in this sentiment, but to me words have tremendous power and should be chosen with care.

(I also dislike the term "clean" when it comes to food choices for similar reasons, but I know I'm REALLY out on the gangplank with that one around here, so I'll be quiet now.)

I have a free day once a week - not a binge, just a day where I eat a meal that's not 'clean' plus maybe a bit too much of something sweet. It's also a day where I don't count calories, but I'd guess I go about 500 over maintenance on that day, sometimes more. It's just a break for me and *so far* has not caused any weight gain. If it does, I'll cut it down to less frequent.

It's helpful for me since I am so anal about eating 'clean' the rest of the week to allow myself a little leeway, plus the next day I feel just a tad guilty so it's easy to get back on the wagon.

Each to his own, you need to determine what will not cause you to gain fat or derail your eating plan.

I'm with most of gals here... I choose my treats carefully, in moderate portion...I dislike the stuffed feeling after a large meal, portion control is crucial... Sugar makes me feel lethargic and sleep, "carb coma" like Meg said... The guilt kills me too when I over eat.

I've discovered lately too that I must eat a portion of carbs and a portion of protein... if I have only a carb meal I feel funny, the same goes if I have only protein at a meal...

Like the girls said, you have to play around with what works for YOU...

Welcome to the lifting world and congrats on taking the "diet" mentality out of your life, because it really is a "lifestyle"....

I look for less damaging versions of foods that I like, 'diet' ice cream, portion controlled packets of cookies or chips and work them into my regular diet.

As far as the big splurges, I tend to take them on a case by case basis. I decide if the indulgence, the calories, the comfort, are worth the cost in terms of possible weight gain, delay in weight loss, bloating/discomfort, etc. If it is, I eat it, and don't feel guilty about it (much), since it was worth the cost. If it isn't, I try not to eat it. Sometimes these decisions are made ahead of time (a wedding, a holiday meal etc), and sometimes they just present themselves and I have to make the decision on the fly.

I never plan a 'cheat' day--I have way way too many opportunities for that as it is, without adding more to it!

I also have to agree with funniegrrl about choosing judgemental words to describe food carefully, at least for me. Being a 'cheat' is kind of a harsh label to hang on yourself if you decide to have a cookie. It is a cookie, not a moral failure. Maybe we all make a suboptimal food decision from a health perspective once in a while, but it sure doesn't make us bad people. Might make us fat if we do it too often of course, but not bad people.

I used to pride myself in eating 'unprocessed' foods, until I realized that the bag of frozen boneless skinless chicken breasts and skim milk are about as processed as it gets in the animal kingdom, and those 'baby' carrots I eat don't actually grow that way. Not to mention my little diet Coke habit. I can't help but snicker about 'clean' food once in a while, in a good natured sort of way, again the word only--not the concept. That's the word I have used for years about food my dogs haven't managed to lick, shed in, knock over or otherwise claim as their own, as in 'Is that clean?'. It brings different connotations to me than to many of you, obviously. Again, an example of different things working for different people.

These days if I must label my food, and well, I must, I do it in terms of 'healthy' and 'junk' food. I did that consciously, to bring to my attention the real impact of what I put in my mouth, namely on my health, and to try to keep that in mind when I am beating myself up about it (and I will). I find it more productive to do self talk with 'I can make a healthier choice next time' rather than 'Next time I won't cheat'. One statement is about what I do, the other, a flaw in my character.

I like that Anne, specially using the terms 'healthy' and 'junk' food, instead of clean and what, "un"clean food ?... It gives a more positive image... Now the new image I will get when 'clean' is mentionned will be your dogs , as in "Is that clean?" ....

I'm just reading the chapter in Thin for Life on positive self talk...We've spent all our former fat lives talking negative to ourselves and that wasn't working for, so let's try to be positive...BTW, Meg I can't wait for the book discussion, I'm looking forward to what everyone will have to say... So for the moment I am about it...

If I do something like go out drinking. I'll be really good for a couple of days before and cut back slightly and then I'll stick to things like vodka rather than beer.

Thank you all for your quick and insightful answers!! It's great to get a perspective from people who have learned through experience. I like the points you made about using certain words which directly or indirectly create judgement labels on ourselves. That's something I may not have picked up on til further on in my journey.

Basically you confirmed what my instinct was telling me -- at this point, I'm certain that to eat something sugary, in particular, would most likely trigger a binge. It was hard enough for me to cut it out of my diet, without intentionally teasing myself with a "taste", because I can never stop with just "one". Maybe that will change with time....

As for "clean" or "un-clean" -- isn't there an 8-second rule that applies here? (When you drop it, if it stays on the floor less than 8 seconds it's still considered edible?)

Luanne

I agree that words are very powerful. I especially hate 'I was good today, I was bad today' when referring to what one eats. (As opposed to having good and bad days with respect to our food programs) And I also dont like 'cheat' when referring to food. Food is an inanimate object. It simply 'is'. Some has more calories than others. Some are more refined than others, some are more healthy than others too. We can pick and choose among all this variety, but its neither good nor bad nor cheating nor are we for consuming it.

What I object to about 'cheat' days most is the basic concept. If the long-term goal of wl and maintaining is to learn to live with food in a more healthy manner, to learn to live consistently with lower fat, more veggies and so forth, cheat days to me are throw backs to the potentially rampant eating days of the past. They do not re-inforce new eating habits still shakey, but instead remind us of the way we used to eat with little discipline. They also might give the impression that once the diet/wl is over, the person can once again return to that way of eating. With plans that allow 'cheat' days, do they suggest these continue once you have lost the weight?

I pretty much choose to eat what I want to, when I want to, but choose to have something special only when its very special, or the people or occasion is special. Like Thanksgiving tomorrow. Mostly I choose to eat less and lower calorie foods.

Jan

- like when you drop an Oreo? Been there, done that!

I never heard the phrase 'clean food' until I started spending too much time at a gym. I really don't think it has anything to do with cleanliness or virtue per se - it's just bodybuilder talk for referring to a certain way of eating. Kind of a shorthand, you know? Like if you're doing Weight Watchers, you refer to yourself as being 'on plan' or 'on program' and other WW members instantly understand what you mean? It eliminates the need to go into details about individual food choices if you're talking to someone who's familiar with the phrase. However, I think the meaning that's communicated all depends on your audience - I would never use the phrase 'eating clean' around my parents, for example, since they would be completely baffled and think that had something to do with washing my food or something!

Ilene - I'm really excited about our Thin For Life reading group too! I just got my copy of the revised edition and hope to finish it this weekend. Look for a forum-wide announcement over the next few days!