Hey y'all I hope you don't mind if I join in and begin with a venting session.

I'm a bit bummed today. I just got back from Spring Break, it was a really nice break, but I didn't want it to be over. (And I didn't feel like I was productive enough either.) Unfortunately I had to start the first day back in classes by giving my students (I teach reason and critical thinking) a test back. Many of them are doing very well, but some really screwed up on this last test. One student in particular gave me **** about my teaching style. He said that I should have given them a list of fallacies, or written them up on the board. Other students did poorly on that particular section, but some got all of them right. I feel really bad for this student, he works, goes to school and has a kid, but I have to hold him to the same standard as others. I just don't want to be a bad teacher.

fluid and hannah:

noodles: He's in an aquarium by himself for right now. We got him at a pet store so we need to quarantine him for a couple weeks to be sure he's not sick. Then over the course of the next two weeks we're going to introduce him to the other five boys. If that goes well, he'll move into a cage with them (that we're going to build an addition on to... we built that cage ourselves in the first place, so we can do that.) I know introducing boys can be difficult, but I've done it twice successfully with girls. Plus I've raised these five since the day they were born, and they are all so sweet. They don't get in fights like the girls do. They've always been very nice to each other and to me and they're like little teddy bears. I'm interacting with Badger as much as I can... but he's still not to the point where he'll take treats out of my hand. (He'll eat them after I put them in his food dish, though! )

haha... okay, sorry for the rambling about rats.

Goodnight alternachicks.

Ok...remember that giant quilt and Living-Room re-arrangement project I had been working on and griping about?? Well...here's the pics!!! Just click on the link and take a peek.

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/show...621#post545621

Noodles...I LOVE that quilt!!! its absolutetly beautiful! Living room looks great too!!!

Hannah : I think you have the right idea. don't let it bum you out.
Noodles : looking good. the quilt is beautiful.

ok my rant :
I have a friend that we are pretty close. I am usually at her house every day. well wasn't able to go over there this weekend. last time i had spoke to her everything was fine. she called me sunday and i told her i couldn't make it. it was my hubby's birthday and we had plans. she pretty much hung up on me. ok so i figured she was mad about something and would let me know or it would blow over. then Monday she shows up at my house walks in *****es because my son got his bike out of her yard ( he had left it there) and didn't tell her. we live about three blocks away. ok so i am still confused. something like that i figure a phone call could clear up. well out she stomps. so i know now she is mad at me but why? last time i saw her everything was fine. then phone rings she is clearly upset and tells me that she thinks it is a 1 sided friendship. i have to laugh at this. we both do a lot for each other. i tell her i don't believe in tit for tat friendships and try to figure out what is going on. she hangs up on me. which i hate. then 2nd call same stuff how i am not there for her. and she seems to have a problem with when my hubby is off i don't come over. i only see him 2 days a week. the rest of the time is coming and going. try to explain to her that i don't understand and if she has something going on to let me know and we will work it out. then bam " she makes a comment about wanting to be dead" and hangs up on me again.
I just don't get it. when i last saw her everything was fine. if she had told me that there was a problem or she needed me i would have been there. but i was busy spending time with my family and running errands. I am not in the mind set to have a big drama but we have been close friends for a while.
well i just needed to get that off my chest..

Well it seems that something is going on with her by that comment about wanting to be dead.

Maybe you could try popping over to her house with some flowers or fresh baked cookies for a cup of tea and sympathy? Tell her that the two of you have been friends for a long time and that you really care about her and that you are upset at what has transpired. Point out that you are worried about her and it is unlike her to act like this so you know something is wrong and that you are there for her and want to help her or if there is a problem between the two of you that you value her friendship and would like to sort it out.

Often people are upset about things and lash out at friends or family for what appears to be no reason or something small when there is something else bothering them.

Good luck

Heather -

as a M/D with an incredibly supportive best friend, let me just say this... don't give up. but, by the same token, don't push. it sounds like you've got the type of friendship where deep down, she knows you're there for her, even though she's angry about you not being RIGHT there when she thinks you should have been.

definately do something to let her know that you're ready to talk when she is. then, really, you have to leave it up to her. harping will just foster more anger.

BUT! once you are talking again, and this present crisis has calmed down, make sure she realizes that yes, she's your friend, but that doesn't give her the right to guilt you about spending time with your husband. and while you will always be there for her, you also have an obligation to be there for him.

let us know how it works out. *hugs*

Heather - It sounds like there maybe something else going on. If you really want to save the friendship, be patient and supportive.

Hello to the rest of the chicks!

Just trying to stay awake at work. I am so tired and my head (sinuses) feels like it is going to explode.

Have a wonderful day chicks!

thanks for the advice chickies. i did talk to her yesterday. and try to explain that if she wanted to talk about whatever was bothering her i was there. but i am pulling myself into "turtle" mode. yesterday my son was playing next door to her and she ws telling him she was going to kill herself. I called her mother, but am starting to pull away. i don't understand what all is going on. but that oversteps my boundaries as a parent. and kinda freaked me out. I guess her mother has been with her the past couple of days. so i know she has someone there.

fluid your advice was right on with what i had come to in my mind. but the one thing i can't understand is why she choose to act so negative? torwards me to get my attention. I am bipolar, but i never personally attacked her . so i guess that got my hackles up.

blugirrl, it definitely sounds like your friend is in need of some kind of intervening help. It is probably good that you called her mother. I hope that she returns to herself soon.

I spoke to the student today who blew up at me Monday. He let me know a bit more about what is going on in his life. He and his wife just had their first baby at the beginning of the semester and he hasn't really had a lot of time to devote to studying. He let me know that he was sorry and that he knew he was out of line. I'm going to meet with him on Friday to try and work out some of his problems with the material. I certainly have a lot more empathy towards his situation now than I did before.

On a better note I got a paper back yesterday that I wrote on Kant (I have had a very difficult time with the material in the past) and I got an A on it! The prof even said that my argument was probably better than the one he gave us in class. So I'm back to feeling pretty good about things.

Hannah glad that things worked themselves out with your student.
squeak, hope your sinuses stop bugging you.

Woke up this morning with absolutely no energy today. odd really because i am such a morning person. just about bound out of bed. hope this blah feeling goes away.
well just wanted to say morning to everyone.

Great news Hannah! Good going on your paper!

Hope you are feeling better Heather

I am not a morning person. I have tried and tried to be but...the best time of the morning for me is when I go to bed. Only reason Im up right now is cause I actually went to bed at a reasonable time (for me anyhow LOL) and at 4 am...here comes the big slug...purrrrrrrr...meow...ARGH!! I love him but not when I'm in a nice dream!!

PS: Here's the big slug in question.

What a cutie! I have the same type of cat but she is still small - only 2 years old.

She has a bad habit of running into the bathroom everytime you go in there and hopping in the tub then whining until you pour some water around the drain so she can drink it. Apparently bathroom water tastes much better than the fresh water I put in her bowl every morning