[onebyone]

Hi Coaches

I was out being a good friend today to my newly-car-less friends with my rental car and one of the places we went was Value Village, a chain second hand store and I found a Beck Diet For Life book on their shelves. Pretty much untouched. It looked like the previous owner read a few pages in and that was that. So I got my book for $4.99 a very good deal. I was leafing through it and it doesn't have the breakdown into days that my workbook has. Hmmm. Though it does have a breakdown in the back of the book, in a tick-the-boxes-off chart. I guess I'll have to read it. That feels like too much work today. How awful is that?

I think I'm depressed.

Anyhoo... Food was not so good today. I ate at meal times but I ate poorly. I'd give myself 30% for the day cause I made sure to eat fresh fruit. credit. I did manage to once more freeze some food for later so credit for doing that. I am still sleeping in the afternoon. Still recovering my energy I think and yesterday I bent over the side of the tub to wash my hair under the faucett and I pulled a muscle in my neck! I could not believe it. I feel so decrepit - like I'm held together by old rusty snaps and they're popping open because they just don't work anymore.
*snap*
*sigh*

So I won't continue this note any longer.

maryblu

I need to address your question about the Nutrition Action Newsletter issue, Bill. The first four pages devoted to Kessler. As I read it, I kept thinking of onebyone
I think if you can get your hands on Kessler's book, it might help you. It might make you mad, and sometimes mad is what it takes. It is maddening that there is an effort to combine fat, salt, and sugar to entice and trigger the spots in our brain that react as rats in a cage and want more, more, more. It is worth a shot, onebyone. Get mad.

I think I'll look him up. Thanks for the tip getting mad often makes me move or make a change. Any specific book I should be looking for that you recommend?

at the gang -- have a good evening.

[ChinaMaine]

The guests are gone, the rain is here and I’m tired! But it was a fun weekend. As keeps happening in this oh-so-dreary-summer, we had one fantastic day this weekend – Saturday. Kayaking, fishing, a bonfire, and good conversation made it a lovely day. Today was back to normal - it started foggy and devolved into weather-misery. But we still squeezed in fishing (my brother and his daughters) and kayaking (me and my SIL). Food was op in calories, and I stayed op for drinking as well. Since my brother and SIL are exercising daily and dieting, we took turns in engaging in serious exercise both days. It’s certainly a lot more fun that way!

WI-up 0.25 lbs from Friday. Saturday: Read my cards, made a plan. (Didn’t do either on Sunday, oh well…) Food – op, Exercise – op.

Bill for hitting pre-vacation gym levels! The mangos sound fantastic!

Erika Kudos for being op again – you are definitely in a groove. Hope you had good luck with day 13!

Robin and hope you got a long, hot soak!

one by one I’m sorry you’re still feeling depressed. but credit for eating fresh fruit – and for posting here – and for buying a Beck book! Too bad about pulling your neck…

[maryblu]

Onebyone, that is David Kessler's book. As I reread the newsletter today with the highlights of his book, I was struck by how much his strategies mirror Beck's. Listen to what he says:

Replace chaos with structure. Determine ahead of time what you will eat. Block everything else out. Sound familiar?

I am skipping ahead...

Rehearse. Anticipate your moves..tell yourself, "If I encounter chocolate-covered pretzels, I will keep walking." Sound familiar?

The neat part about Beck is she lays out every possible scenario, catches us with every possible sabotaging thought, and just doesn't let us get away with it.

It is maddening, though, what the food industry is up to..

Hope it helps.

Update on raspberries; I actually picked a bowl and brought them in to eat with yogurt. Yum.

Was excited to see a few teeny tiny green beans forming today. I feel as if I had had an ultrasound and saw a tiny fetus, I was so excited. It has been a dreadful year for warm season veggies. Great for flowers, for veggies, not so much.

[irishune]

Hi All

Cloudy monday morning here in Ireland.Seems the weather has not been great for a lot of you in the USA this summer either.Everyone I know was so hoping for a good summer to lift the economic doom and swine flu gloom that is completely enveloping us but so far no joy.
I had an OP weekend for food and OP for exercise.(my exercise plan for the weekend is always to take a break from it until Monday.It is at least a plan)
My success to date in staying on plan revolves around writing it all down but also keeping to a few simple meal choices.I have around 5 basic lunches and dinners and I recycle them unless I am eating out.I know this would be too boring for many people and on my diet programme we are of course encouraged to be creative and cook fab, gourmet meals. I find it easier when I am not thinking about food or planning complicated recipes.I tell myself it is only fuel and it only needs to be healthy and eneough to keep me going.I eat it all freshly cooked and lots of fruit and veg so I will see how this works for me.Maybe this is just what I need now and when I feel more confident I will introduce more variety.I do realise though that the food itself is not that important to me.I have no particular cravings.I am overweight because I have no concept of when I am full.I eat totally mindlessly and have used food all my life to fill up huge holes of stress,boredom or anxiety or any other uncomfortable emotions and have done so since childhood. These holes can never be filled up with food but I have never stopped trying. This is why I like Beck.It is a thinking programme.I need to ask myself "why am I doing this?" when overeating.
Day 18-----"you might link the sensation of overfulness with feeling safe or protected"
One-by-one---have you ever considered a house swap as a way to have a cheap holiday.It is very popular in Europe and there are loads of websites.It would only cost you your travel expenses. You could probably find somewhere quite close even. Richard Carlson has a great wee book"Stop Thinking and Start Living" which is very short but totally helpful in dealing with depressive and negative thoughts.Definitely worth a read.
Talking of readers----well done to all the book club members
Hope your day is better today RobinW.
Sounds like things are ok for you,Erika and ChinaMaine.Lets see if we can all have a positive week
Une

[BillBlueEyes]

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Did a bunch of walking that included a nice outing with DW after dinner; CREDIT moi. Saw a young Green Heron looking lost, perched on top of a chin link fence - a decidedly un-Greeen-Heron place to be - perhaps waiting for a parent to bring dinner. Also saw a Black-crowned Night Heron, a good find for that spot.

We have two juvenile Mourning Doves resident in our small yard that need to be shooed away to sit on our patio. They accept our right to be here, but otherwise pay no heed. Periodically a parent briefly appears to let them stick their bills in their gullet to get some regurgitated food

Eating was OP including a tuna fish salad for lunch made with onion, cucumber, pickled mushrooms, capers, lots of fresh ground black pepper, and no-fat yogurt served on Romaine lettuce leaves; CREDIT moi. I just love it when I make tuna fish without mayonnaise which for my whole life I just assumed was, in great quantities, the basis of tuna fish salad.


maryblu - Drooling at the thought of your raspberries on the way to the compost pile. LOL at your gentle response to the Beck-in-you that raspberries are to be eaten from the vine as the urge arises. A zillion black bears couldn't be wrong. And besides, who's ever seen an overweight black bear?

Love it that you're a J.K. Rowling's fan; I've read all seven Harry Potter's, purchasing all at dawn on release date to finish within a few days. I Amazoned the Merlin trilogy by Mary Stewart onto my shopping list; sounds like fun winter reading.


onebyone - Yay for finding Beck Diet for Life for $4.99 - that's a great bargain. Nope, Beck's second book abandons the 42 day structure, which I also really liked. It forced me to work the program instead of just reading, feeling warm, saying to myself that I already do all those things, and then ignoring it. As Anne (wndranne) points out in her review, the new Cheat Sheet is a great addition for examining wandering off our path.

Sending supportive thoughts as you find your path out of the blues. Kudos for giving yourself credit for the fresh fruit and food prep. Ouch for the pulled neck muscle; it's easy to see how that can trigger negative body feelings, but, that's just your Mara talking - you can choose your response to those feelings. Perhaps try what Erika (eusebius) wrote, "Invite them to tea."

I agree with maryblu that The End of Overeating might make you mad. It made me mad that I'm such a sucker for the manipulations of the food industry.


ChinaMaine - What a fantastic weekend even with only one sunny day. Does make me want to find a way to go kayaking again - it's been a bunch of years since I did the Saco River in Maine. Noting that you're also a Mary Stewart fan.

By-the-by, you can delete your duplicated post, if you want, by clicking [EDIT] then [DELETE] which then appears.


Erika (eusebius) - Kudos for writing out your meal plan; that means that now you can officially start monitoring your eating. I do like that Beck suggests working the program for two weeks before starting your eating plan; that so gives the right perspective. Good luck on your walk today.

And thanks for noting "snogging." That isn't a word from my teenage years.


Une (irishune) - Kudos for digging right in to the heart of the matter with, "I need to ask myself 'why am I doing this?' when overeating." You are certainly on the right track there.

Your simple eating plan sounds good to me - each of us individually has to find our way to combat mindless overeating. It was a major insight for me that I wasn't eating for any particular reason, I was just eating.


Readers -

How Thin People Think
. . .
• Do you sometimes eat past the point of mild fullness?
. . .
The Beck Diet Solution, pg 33.

[freer]

BillBlueEyes,
I haven't posted on here in a LONG time. I just wanted to thank you for your quotes at the end of your daily posts. They give me a 'thought for the day' that is very helpful!

I continue to follow Beck eating (most of the time) one year later! Thus far I've been unable to lose more, but I have maintained, so that's good news.

Just wanted to tell all of you that I'm lurking and I appreciate all of your thoughts!

[kuhljeanie]

a mixed bag this weekend. we had a huge family reunion and two parties. i can easily destroy any calorie deficit i build up during the week on the weekends, but since i have no time for the crazy exercise sessions, i’ve been more moderate in my blow-outs. this is a good thing but it’s putting my recent eating behavior into perspective. while i’m thrilled i haven’t gained back much at all, my thinking was about 80% relapsed. must remember to thank my body for fighting for a healthier set point – and remind myself why it’s so critical to fight for a healthier mindset instead of relying on my fitness to get me through.

so:

·first weekend in a looooong time of logging everything. go me.
·emailed my diet coach and informed her that i’d be sending her my calorie totals for each day (eaten and burned.) i’ve never had that kind of accountability before to someone else. go me.
·didn’t let some off-plan eating lead to lots of more off-plan eating. go me.
·realized i’d gone over my calorie burn target without formal exercise. go me!
·gave myself permission to enjoy fantasizing about opening a bakery/café without the accompanying noise about being realistic or responsible or even having the internal conversation about whether it’s something i want to do the rest of my life. go me.
·got some really good sleep all the way up to last night. yay me and yay DH for keeping the kid away saturday morning.
·brought the leftover reunion cake into work and dropped it at the table where you put those things for everyone to take. nice work, self.

we still don’t have a solid decision on daycare, but we’ve got a couple of options that could work as a stopgap. so i’m not falling apart over that. the really crap thing right now is that in a month, we’ve had 20 showings for our house (a LOT!) but more than half the feedback forms say that the buyer’s not interested at least in part because of the train wreck of a house next door. the guy has his windows boarded up and his backyard is pretty Clampett, if you kwim. i’m going to stop by and ask him nicely this week to clean up what he can because he’s scaring off buyers. if he doesn’t, i’m within my rights to file a complaint with the city – but i hesitate to do that because i don’t know if he’ll retaliate against my vacant house. double whammy – the insanely expensive insurance i had to switch to when we moved out doesn’t friggin’ cover vandalism. so i’m feeling stuck. am i actually stuck? not sure. maybe. dunno. two new cake orders (one for cupcakes, which is kind of new for me but i have LOTS of ideas, which i won’t share here, because they border on food porn – but i’m sort of unaffected in an odd way.) one of the people i met at the reunion is a restaurant designer who gave me a card and a catalogue, and my yoga teacher wants me to meet her friend who’s opening a new veggie restaurant and needs pastries. kismet?

bill, your tuna salad sounds so good, i may have to put it on my list for next week’s lunches. i’m thinking creamy silken tofu would work beautifully as a base too. definitely worth a try! hi freer! onebyone, i’m right there with you. some days i just feel so exhausted and i’m spending a lot of energy wondering if everything is really worth the effort, when houses just deteriorate, money gets drained, and people are so busy and wrapped up in their stuff it’s hard to just enjoy each other even if you can get past all the scheduling challenges. i miss having my days to myself. i’m getting super resentful of the time i spend commuting through 45 solid miles of construction (and that’s just the highway time – doesn’t count the ½ hour of onramp/offramp sweating and swearing.) and please, PLEASE STOP RAINING! my basement is flooded and i’m going to have to spend more freaking money to pay someone to fix it so someone else will BUY THE STUPID HOUSE.

thanks guys…that kind of turned into a rant, huh?

une, i’m envious! i wish i didn’t really care about food. beck is such a fabulous fit for you! mary, i think i need to read the Kessler book too. i’m reading the instinct diet right now but it’s taking me forever to get through – no time. i’ve got a bunch of cookie and cupcake books coming from amazon…how’s that for ironic? i probably won’t have time to really read those either, though. china, your weekend sounds lovely. and robin, what we need is a big virtual hot tub so to hang out in! i have a real one at the cincinnati house…if we move it up to dayton it’ll cost $350, but more importantly will leave a big spot on the deck that will require even more money to stain and seal. so i press on without. erika, go you! love those streaks…ride it as long as it lasts so i can enjoy it vicariously through you until mine starts!

until later...

[AnneWonders]

Coaches/Buddies I rode up the local mountain on my bike this weekend. About 36 miles and 7000 vertical feet of climbing. OUCH. Ran into weather and had to call a friend to haul me down. Double OUCH. Flat tires too. Not my best day.

I'm seconding maryblu's comment about being struck by Kessler's strategies being Beck ones. I was astonished. Lots of astonishing stuff in that book, including "pre-chewed" (I paraphrase but not much) chicken breasts at your local chain restaurant. Yuck.

Hanging in for today.

BillBE, LOL on Hermione. You should really look up the Michael Scott Alchemist series if you haven't already.

everyone. I seem to have lost the ability to do personals. I'm once again glad you are all here, and am hoping to get my stuff together any day now.

Anne

[onebyone]

Hi Everybody!

So I ended up reading the introduction and the first two chapters of the BDFL book. I was reminded why I came here in the first place. I'd forgotten that it seems. In this second book she really emphasizes more of certain aspects of the first book. I wish I had my book in front of me but I don't. Anyway this time I truly understand why advantage response cards, ARC's, are so valuable and why we read them everyday. I can't believe this escaped me last time. It's to make the responses to food temptations and situations automatic, so we don't have to rely on our own automatic responses which got me here to over 270lbs.

My automatic responses cannot be trusted to lead me to weightloss. Not at all. So I am literally "filling my head" with alternative thoughts and behaviours to do/think when my own history would lead me astray.

I guess I fill my head now so I don't fill my face later?

And I do it NOW, right NOW, not when faced with the sweet thing, when I am starving cause I missed my breakfast as I rushed out the door cause I was late cause I stayed up too late the night before because I really didn't want to face the coming day... you know those kinds of days. I used to have a a lot of them. For me these are the effects of procrastination--guilt & avoidance behaviours. I need to just do what needs to be done and put it behind me. And if I really don't want to do that anymore, and I can change it, I need to take the actions to do that too.

Dr. Beck promises in her book that this will be the LAST TIME I will ever have to lose weight. Dr. Beck promises that I will also be able to maintain my weight in all circumstances. Dr. Beck promises that if I do what she says to the T I will get these results. I think I may have to remind myself of these promises and call her on them. I will do whatever she says and we'll see if it works. She says it will. whatevergirlfriend My job is to do the work and let's just see if she's as smart as she says she is. If I can do it and get the results she promises it's really something. I am a hard nut, with 35 years of hardcore eating and weight gain and weight loss only through deprivation and unhealthy extreme dieting. I have been unable to maintain any loss and my weight goes up and now I am 45 and my biology is making it that much harder.

So I am going to follow her new book to a T and that will be my new job. I will do my best to do that and if I fall off the path I will follow her recommendations as to how to find the path again. You guys are my buddies/coaches and I promise to continue to be honest and to try until "it gets easier and easier" (Dr. Beck promise heretofore known as DBP).

So for today, the day I gather some of my materials and make a list for what I don't have, I have eaten sitting down 95% of the time, and eaten slowly (credit). I did eat standing up twice. I bought a very bad food and consumed it all, sitting down (credit for the sitting down), and considered it my lunch. I did eat breakfast (credit).

wndranne You wrote that you "ran into weather". Is this wind? When we visited Las Vegas we discovered that "weather" there is wind... Or did you have rain? I'm very curious to know what you ran into! Kudos for attempting that climb on your bike...sorry for the flat tires

kuhljeanie

one of the people i met at the reunion is a restaurant designer who gave me a card and a catalogue, and my yoga teacher wants me to meet her friend who’s opening a new veggie restaurant and needs pastries. kismet?

I see you are staying open to the possibilities and the universe is answering. Interesting. Keep following the path my friend - it's leading you somewhere for sure. Big CREDITS for all your good Beck work. And it seems you are creating some needed balance for yourself. Excellent. I'll give you a gold star=extra credit for that one! So hard to do.

freer Credit to you for realizing what an accomplishment it is to keep the weight off. Awesome. Glad to hear from you and that you are doing well.

BillBlueEyes Funny you should write about tuna fish salad. I have had a hankering for collecting some tuna salad and salmon salad recipes for lunches for myself. I think this would be a very doable way for me to get some fish (with a minor in vegetables) into my life. I think no-fat yogurt is icky but I'll give it a try. If it can replace mayo then it's a good thing. Credit on being OP.

irishune

My success to date in staying on plan revolves around writing it all down but also keeping to a few simple meal choices.I have around 5 basic lunches and dinners and I recycle them unless I am eating out.

this is my future plan too. I have read in several books now and several places that keeping choices to a minimum is a really really good strategy. For me, I think it will be a really great way to go too. Thank for reporting in that it's working for you. Credit to you for being and staying OP over the weekend. I know weekends can be real challenges.

maryblu I found a shared audio file of David Kessler that I am looking forward to listening to. on I do get really mad to find out I am duped by something to behave a certain way. grrrr. Lots of brilliant minds out there all trying to predict our every move and to force us into their boxes FOR THEIR OWN PROFIT. ugh. Terrible. The sheer immorality of so many systems and things in our world just make me crazy. I feel it a personal duty to resist as much as I can. off I'll report back on the Kessler audio stuff when I've listened to it...

ChinaMaine Kudos for being OP through your weekend with guests even! Your resistance muscle remains flexed and toned. Good work.

RobinW Sometimes we are the last thing on our own to-do lists. I know all about that. Credit for knwoing you need to move up to the top of the priority list. I hope you had you Calgon bath. Me? I like my Powerpuff Girls grape bubblebath (I shouldn't be using it up. It'll be collectible someday!) or Mr. Bubbles... Hope you had a good start to the week.

Okay ta ta for now.

[ChinaMaine]

Back to work, did the work any chimp could do today. But had a good day from a food / exercise perspective, although nothing stellar. But since I wasn’t too enthused – extra credit!

WI-up 1 lb, Read my cards, made a plan. Food – op, Exercise – op.

one by one Wow – big credit to you! It’s great you are reading Beck’s book with a fresh eye; getting materials together, etc. It is a new day, and you are starting anew! We are all rooting for you!!

Anne Perhaps it wasn’t your best day, but certainly quite an acheivement – 36 miles and 7K vertical feet. Credit! No worries about personals, just love to see you post. Especially when you don’t have a headache.

freer – credit for maintaining – I think maintaining is harder than losing weight. You don’t have the frequent positive feedback of weight going down, etc.

Bill It’s nice to hear about the herons and mourning doves. I love the sound of mourning doves; makes me sleepy. Is the Saco fast water? I am a still water kayaker, but may try to learn fast water sometime. All my nephews (and DS) are avid fast water kayakers, but my reflexes and steering are not up to it yet.

Une Too bad the weather is as bad in Ireland as it is in much of the states and Canada this year. I think your diet plan sounds very reasonable – as Bill said, we each have to find our own way. So the most important thing is if the plan works for you. I can see where simplicity in food prep would work really well. Good luck!

Maryblu Dreaming of fresh picked raspberries. I wonder if our wild ones will mature in this miserable summer?

[AnneWonders]

Quickie for onebyone. My "weather" was hail, thunderstorms and really really close lightning. Not a great day on the bike.

Anne

[Walking Princess]

Hi,

I'm brand new to this support board. I've been looking for a message board for other people following the Beck Diet Solution. I'm so glad I found you!

I am married with one son who is 7. I have struggled with my weight most of my life. I am not skinny "naturally". This books is the first thing that has made me feel that I can really be successful permanently this time. I am currently on day 17 and love the program so much!

Anyway, thank you for letting me join you. Have a great evening.

Kara

[BillBlueEyes]

Kara (Walking Princess)

And, on the occasion of your first post to 3FC,

How did you find out about Dr. Beck's books?

And how did you find this thread on 3FC?

[BillBlueEyes]

Diet Coaches/Buddies - Did gym with an improved attitude; CREDIT moi. Instead of counting down the reps through clenched teeth wishing it was over, I concentrated on the exercise, accepting that the muscles were supposed to feel the strain. Enjoyed that improvement.

Small victory: When passing a secretary's desk with a candy dish, I noticed that I wasn't drawn to it. CREDIT moi. Nice for me since before my journey, every dish I saw I wanted some. And, during my early time, I had to counter every dish with "That's Not About Me."

Was abandoned by my DW to grub for my own dinner, so found some lemon pepper chicken and grilled veggies at the supermarket deli that I could eat cold in our seasonably appropriate, but recently rare, warm evening; CREDIT moi. Not bad, and I saved enough to have for lunch today.


Jean (kuhljeanie) - Kudos for re-dedication to a "healthier mindset." I particularly liked, "gave myself permission to enjoy fantasizing about opening a bakery/café without the accompanying noise about being realistic or responsible or even having the internal conversation about whether it’s something i want to do the rest of my life." Love the thought of having someplace to be free!!!

Good luck approaching your Cincinnati neighbor about the yard; Yep, that's a tricky one. Is there some way to make it sending over your yard crew to tidy up for the "over-sensitive" buyers?


onebyone - Thanks for the reminders of the first two chapters of The Complete Beck Diet for Life. I like getting refreshed about reading my Advantage Response Cards; that it's training my brain to think differently.

Kudos for firing up your determination to do the Beck strategies. It's great to share your enthusiasm.


Anne (wndranne) - Good grief, "hail, thunderstorms and really really close lightning." This dessert living is for the seriously hearty. But Big Kudos for doing the 36 miles with 7000 foot climb; I'm impressed.

Put "Michael Scott Alchemist" on my reading list, thanks.


ChinaMaine - Yep, Extra Kudos for being OP when not so enthused. Aren't you supposed to be incorporating some 400 pages of corrections at the office, LOL?

Yep, the Saco has some challenging white water places; when i did it, we did the more gentle stretches. I distinctly recall the heart pounding as I just barely steered us away from one boulder bringing into focus that this was the real thing.


Freer - Thanks for letting us know that you're still around and following the posts and Beck quotes. Kudos for maintaining using your Beck skills.

Are you still "Teachersizing?" Or do you have the summer off to pursue some dream?


Kara (Walking Princess) - Yay that you've already made it to Day 17: End Overeating. Have you already done your Advantage Response Cards and would you care to share some of them here?

Glad you found us also. I share that feeling that the Beck strategies can make this weight loss permanent.


Readers -

How Thin People Think
. . .
• Do you fool yourself about your eating? In other words, do you sometimes tell yourself that it "won't matter" if you eat a small piece of something you're not supposed to eat?
. . .
The Beck Diet Solution, pg 33.

[freer]

Bill

The Teachersizing is set to begin in about a month!