Hi SheriaVa - welcome to our thread. Congratulations on losing 35 pounds already and by yourself no less. It sounds like you have great will power and determination. Are you still losing with some regularity?

I too have never been thin so don't know what my goal weight should be. I just hope that there will be a point in my life where that is my biggest worry. Hopefully when you get to your optimal weight you'll know or you'll listen to your body tell you.

You said you were single. Are you dating, in a relationship, looking? Glad to have you here.

Ang

Thank you for the welcome!

Yep. In fact, I've lost more in the past 2 months than in the several months before that. I still lose VERY VERY slowly though, compared to most people. I think that's a combination of being over 50 and having hypothyroidism.

I am not in a relationship nor dating. This has been one of the longest periods in my life where I haven't dated anyone--about 6 years. It took me a long while to move past my feelings for the last guy I dated because we have stayed in regular touch ever since he left the area.

Additionally, it has just been a period when there wasn't a lot of interest from men (at least not from men *I* was interested in dating), so the two combined have kept me single and unattached for 6 years.

As for whether I'm looking, I'm on the fence about that. In an ideal world, I would adore having a healthy committed relationship with a wonderful man. However, I must admit that I have enjoyed not dealing with the "BS" of dating these past 6 years. It has actually been quite freeing!

Compared to me you lose at an incredible speed since I don't lose at all. Slow and steady is good. You're more likely to keep it off. Keep up the good work.

If you are happy being single then more power to you. I think if you have a fulfilling life and friends it is not so hard to be 'alone'. If you're like me and new to your area and have very few friends it is hard. If you decide to date people will be able to tell by your attitude and you'll find someone. The BS is BS though and I could definitely do without it. Why can't men just talk so we don't have to guess what they are thinking. I try to have the attitude that this is who I am, take it or leave it. I don't see myself as a typical woman and won't change for any man.

Enjoy the weekend!

I don't see myself as the typical woman either. I have spent much more of my life alone than I've spent attached, and that has provided me the opportunity to grow a lot as a person and to really know what it is I want and what I don't want (in a relationship, in a man, and otherwise).

I have a REALLY low tolerance for BS and I'm a very independent person. I am also quite old-fashioned in regard to sex (in terms of not wanting to have sex with strangers) and absolutely positively will not budge on that issue.

A lot of guys SAY they want a strong woman but, when it comes down to brass tacks, they really don't. They want a woman who won't smother them and can do some things for herself, but will still do what he wants. When they come face to face with someone who will not bend to their will, they get pretty unhappy. I've seen it time and again.

So I plan to be single until I can find someone who really and truly can handle a woman who has a mind of her own.

Good for you, SheriaVa. You shouldn't put up with anything, especially since you know what you want. I know what I want but for some reason accept less, but that's a whole different post. I have been on my own a lot and have a career, doctorate, and just bought my own house. My present bf (I think he still is at least) says it doesn't bother him but I think it hurts his ego to know that I am independent and don't NEED him. he doesn't make nearly as much money and isn't quite as 'stable' with his life as I 'appear' to be. I wish he would just realize that money and things don't matter and the fact that I WANT him should be all that counts. Men and their pride.

I am trying to make friends in a new town. Does anyone have any suggestions for good activities to meet people? As you can tell, it is Friday night and I am home alone on the computer. Pretty sad but it's this or clean the house and that's not happening on a Friday night.

Ang

Hi everyone. Sorry I was MIA last week, but the first part of the week started out terrible and I never made time to get to the library to use the computer.

Happy to meet SheriaVA - girl, you are right on about men! I have been dating someone for several years but I live alone, by my choice. I don't have time for BS and head games either; I agree on the sex thing too. Great minds do think alike!

Hello Ang - I didn't know you had a doctorate - what field is it in and is this the field you work in? I don't know the size of the region you live in, but do they have any singles groups or maybe a YMCA? You could try volunteer work (a hospital or library) and get to know people that way. If you bowl, you could join a team in a bowling league.

Hi Lilwolfe - what do you do in pastures - do you work with animals?

My time here is about up. Hope you all have a nice day.

I just wanted to say hi, I just noticed this thread from the general list. I am 29 and not married nor am I currently dating either. Funny thing is that I find it easier to diet when I am alone than when I am dating. I always have a hard time dating mostly because I am really shy but it doesn't bother me as I am pretty independant.

Hi Everyone.

Welcome nelie. I agree with you that it can be easier to lose weight when you are alone. There seem to be so many emotional issues to contend with when you are in a relationship.

Connie - my doctorate is in industrial engineering and this is the field I work in, although I do research. Thanks for the ideas for meeting people. I live near a city but the town I live in has mostly married people with children (true suburb). I am planning on joining the YMCA in September but it is the club where the families go (the other clubs are much more expensive so I am sticking with the YMCA). I'm sure I'll meet some people though. I have also been thinking about volunteering but have not decided what I want to do or where I would volunteer. I like animals but feel like I should volunteer somewhere that has more people. I think I am still adjusting to the whole house and new life thing. One day at a time and hopefully it will fall into place and the relationships will come too.

Connie - has your week gotten better?

Ang

Hi there,

First, let me re-introduce myself. I am LA. I started this thread WAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY back when. And I just dropped it like a hot potato Actually what happened was I get really fired up and then like a lot of others, I got depressed, busy, lazy...whatever..and stopped posting.

I am so thrilled you ladies (and gentlemen?!?!) have been going so strong. I honestly thought this thread had died until I was at work today doing some research and saw that it was going strong way to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A little bit about myself: I am now 34 years old I am not in a relationship (not unless you count the fact that I'm bitter about my job lol )
I have 2 cats (Caesar & Brutus). I live in TN and have about 90 pounds to lose

I guess I can't really explain why I have such a problem with my weight. I am pretty happy with my life, I enjoy eating healthy foods and I like to go for walks. These things should work together for the overall benefit of myself but I seem to stick to what I know: EAT ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING!!!!!

So I can't explain why I do the things I do. I'm the first person in line for food and the the first to go back for seconds. My portion control is out of control and I honestly think at some point my thighs are going to be engaged lol

So if you do'nt mind welcoming me back into the fold I would be very happy to try again.

LA

Welcome back LA. Of course we would love to have you back - the more the merrier. I can totally understand how energy and motivation can come and go. When I'm depressed it is really hard to accomplish anything, including posting to great forums.

I am also 34 with two cats (Noah and Peanut). Unfortunately/fortunately (??) I think I know exactly why I don't lose weight. I'm not a psychologist, but are sure you are totally happy with your life? Do you limit your eating with just willpower then?

Today is another day with opportunities and hope. Ang

Dixie, sounds like we have a lot in common!

Welcome to nelie and welcome back to LA!

I'm still finding my way here at 3FC and trying to figure out where I can find a thread that relates to me and is active. Glad I found this one.

Hello everyone. Welcome to Nelie.

Welcome back LA. Glad to meet a Tennessee neighbor; I have lived in middle Tennessee all of my life. I have one cat (Tom). I live alone but am in a relationship. I have been using the WW program since May (I've lost 25 lbs on WW and I lost the other 25 lbs on my own). I became a type 2 diabetic last year so I had no choice but to change to a healthier lifestyle.

Ang - so far this week has been better. I shouldn't have let those things get to me. I still give in to my emotions. Part of the problem Monday - I was also dealing with issues from the weekend with my significant other and then I fell and all the emotions surfaced.

SheriVa - I forgot to congratulate you on your weight loss

Lilwolfe - hope you are having a good day.

Well check in with you again all later this week. Bye for now.

Thanks for the welcome. I feel left out by not having any pets I thought about getting a cat, well my ex boyfriend suggested that I should but I am not sure about that as of yet.

I actually didn't realize that a lot of my weight issues were also tied to emotional issues. I tried for years to lose weight and I may lose 20-30 lbs, just to gain it back but I never really felt good about myself. I have been plagued with self esteem issues since I was a child and it became quite acceptable for me to be that way. A couple months ago though, I realized that it was unacceptable for me to have low self esteem, so I actively worked on feeling good about myself. Since then, it has been quite easy for me to watch my diet and exercise. So, I honestly feel I'll be able to lose weight and keep it off this time and hopefully I'm not wrong.

Hi Ladies,

Thanks for the welcome. I am doing okay. It's been a bad day at work--ugh!! I have done so-so eating wise. I have a lot of trouble at nights. I'm alone and not much to do. That's a big no no How are the rest of you.

Connie, I live in East Tennessee. Shyangel, I know I'm not totally happy with my life but if you knew how I was about 2 years ago, you would realize I am lot happier now.

Anyway, hope all is well

LA

Hi Everyone - I hope hump day is bringing good times.

Connie - Giving in to my emotions is my biggest problems. Unfortunately I don't know how to control it, even if my brain is aware of what is happening. This is a new day and a new challenge. Hang in there.

nelie - how did you go about feeling good about yourself? I have been struggling with this problem for a long time and can't seem to break the cycle. I would love any advice or a place to start. The "fake it until you make it" theory just doesn't work for me.

LA - I'm glad your life is better than it was. I guess I just realize that most of my problems with weight/exercising regularly/eating right center around how happy I am and how in control I am of my life. I try changing the actions because I must, but I am also desperately trying to make lasting emotional and mental changes so the battle with weight won't be so hard. I am alone too and hate it. I know exactly what you mean about eating at night. Lately I have just been trying to stay out of the house so I don't just sit on the couch and eat. There are problems with this approach though - nothing gets cleaned or done at my house. Do you have any hobbies or are there any groups or volunteering that you could do to keep you busier at night and increase your socializing? You can always PM me if you want to chat privately. I don't mean to preach or anything but I can relate totally and the only thing that keeps me going is the fact that I must keep trying.

Ang