Hi everyone,

I've spent the majority of my teen and adult life being overweight. Now in my early 30s I am around 100 lbs more than my healthy weight should be. I have tried a few times to lose weight in my 20s when I didn't have so much to lose. A few times I had short lived success with about a 20 lb - 30 lbs weight loss. In the back of my mind, I know I can do it. For some reason, I just never had the will power to stick with it or try again when I failed. I'm ashamed and embarrassed about the way that I look. I feel my weight really has played a role in the person I am today. I'm closed off, except for family ... I have anxiety about going out to places where I'm not hidden in the privacy of my own home. Ever since high school, well even during high school ... I would forgo a lot of things because of my insecurity about my weight. It only got worse as I got older. I'm single and no children but my family means EVERYTHING to me. I'm extremely close with my parents, grandparents ... etc. However, because of how I feel ... I don't go to weddings, baby showers, family functions outside of just my immediate family ...

I'm sick of hiding. I'm angry with myself that I let it get this far but I know in my heart that it's never too late to change the future. I can't go back and redo anything in the past or all the things I've missed out on but I know I can change it for the future.

My parents, who mean everything to me, are the core of who I am. I feel proud as their daughter when they have accomplishments at work or in their personal life, etc. My father will be retiring next spring after 40 years. It's been a much antipicated occasion both family wise and work wise for him. My father puts on a Christmas party every year for his employees/families and every summer he puts on a family day picnic. The last time I attended an event there, was in high school. I've been too ashamed of MYSELF and how I look to go there. I know that my parents love me no matter what and they want me there ... but I just feel embarrassed to go. I dont want people looking at me wondering " this his daughter?? she is huge! " I might be over exaggerating things in my head but thats how I feel so I dont go. Well I was just informed the other night that his employees are planning a bit retirement bash for him at the end of April next year. As his daughter, I am EXTREMELY proud of my father's professional accomplishments and I know it means a lot to him for his family to be there to celebrate with him. I would hate myself if, because of my weight, I didn't go. So I decided, if I've been telling myself the past month that I'm sick of how I feel ... and now I have a goal that I can work toward ... something important that I absolutely HAVE to go to .... now is the time to push ahead with starting a healthier lifestyle.

I'm unsure the best route to take though and have so many questions.

Is it possible for me to lose a HEALTHY amt of weight, yet significant enough that I'll feel better about myself, by the middle of April 2011? I don't want a quick fix or lose weight fast scheme only to regain it back.

What program is best for me? How do I figure that out? I know I have about 100 lbs to lose in total ... does that have anything to do with what program would be best?

I heard drinking water does wonders for not only weight loss but your skin as well. Is that true? I don't have the best skin, especially my face ... and having problems with my scalp. The only " water " I drink pure is when I'm taking a tylenol. I'm a big soda drinker ... and juice. I know thats not good.

I want to find a plan that I can start Monday morning. Some of you might say " Why not start today " ... you're right. I would like to but I have no idea what program to follow so in the meantime ... are there any things I can do to kickstart it before I start an actual program at the beginning of the week? I'm assuming DRINKING WATER would be one?

I'm afraid that once I do lose the weight, my anxiety will still be there. My weight might have been the culprit on how I feel today ... but I know that losing weight isnt a miracle cure so what should I do about the emotional part of this? Is there anything I can do during weight loss to ensure that even when I lose 50 lbs I'm not going to think I'm still extremely overweight and still want to hide?

I appreciate any and all advice anyone can give me on the journey I'm about to embark on.

Much love and success to all!

I can relate to a lot of what you wrote and know that it's possible to overcome all of it if you stay focused and surround yourself with supportive people, in person or online.

At first when I was trying to keep track of my water intake to make sure I got enough, it was easy to lose count. I started leaving a sticky note on the refrigerator to add a tally mark every time I filled up. I always have my bottle with me and refill it right away when it's empty even if I'm not thirsty at the time.

Thank you Beth! And great idea for keeping track of water intake! How much water am I suppose to be drinking though. I know its 8-8oz recommended for daily consumption but is it more when you are trying to lose weight? Also, can I drink my water anytime I want? Or do I have to span it out throughout the day?

MB23,

Hi, and welcome to 3FC! I am in a similar situation... always been overweight... got picked on in school (although I was 144 pounds then, kids in my school were awful) about 100 pounds overweight, 5'4", 30-something, shutting myself off from everything.

You have the right idea... you said "healthier lifestyle". That's exactly what it has to be. I've lost a lot of weight, been down to 135 before, but always started back in with the bad habits and gained it all back.

Well, the way I started it was first cutting out Icky D's. Honestly, now just the thought of the food there makes me sick. I have fast food once a week now, and it's only something off a healthy menu (like the Fresca menu at Taco Bell). I no longer eat at buffets or go for the all-you-can-eat deals. Besides that, I am basically cutting calories. I don't drink anything that isn't low-cal (goodbye, Icky D's sweet tea and Frappe) but I don't worry if it isn't all water. I still allow myself 2 diet sodas a day, and if I want it, I add mix-ins to my water... just making sure I get plenty of fluids. I cut back on all fried foods and sweets.

Since my initial 2 weeks with my new lifestyle, I've averaged 2 pounds lost per week. I am trying to keep it at around 1.5 and 2 pounds per week, the amount that is recommended as being healthiest, and it's said it's easier to keep it off if it's lost at that rate. So.... at that rate, between August 29th and April 17th I can expect to lose between 48 and 64 pounds as long as I stay with it. I'm also incorporating some cardio with my Gazelle... I have some health issues that prevent any real hard-core exercise, but I plan to incorporate more as my stamina improves.

Well, in a nutshell that's what's working for me. There are a lot of different plans out there, and a lot of experience in these forums. The trick is going to be finding what will be best for you, what will be something that will be not just a "diet", but a lifestyle that can keep you motivated to get healthy.

Hope to hear about your successes in the future!!

Hey MB23
This forum is new to me also. I have some of the same feelings about myself. But, what I have to do is this is not a DIET but a way to live. I have lost ALOT of weight but hard to keep it off.
I keep track of my water by a glass that will hold 4 cups (I add a little lemon/lime and a packet of stevia) and re-fill it up when finished.
Best of luck in your journey !

Hello and welcome to 3FC. Good luck to you in your journey and in reaching all your goals.

Welcome and good luck!

Dhani

Good Morning MB23! I read your post and I think you've made a great decision! It's such an exhilarating feeling knowing you're making a difference in your own life. I found for myself that making small changes at the beginning made HUGE differences. Those little changes that you make seem to snowball and lead to other changes. I think it's a great idea to do some research this weekend. Read all you can, fill up on information search for new ideas.
I think it is very possible to lose a healthy amount of weight between now and April. To me, any loss is healthy - especially small amounts. It really adds up! Any time I lose a few pounds I feel great physically and mentally. I hope I don't sound preachy, I just get really excited for people. You can do this! Msg me any time if you need encouragement!
hugs,
Tam

Welcome! I would recommend that you check out several different forums here and see where you feel most comfortable. I have settled into the 100 Pound Club as my "home base", but of course there is the thirty-somethings forum for gals your age, and all kinds of other forums. Also, have you read the Goal! section? It's very inspirational. You'll see lots of pictures of your fellow chicks and roosters who have lost significant amounts of weight. For some reason, seeing the pictures and reading the testimonials was really motivating to me; it meant that I could lose weight, too.

It's good to have a goal in mind, but beware of the trap that some people fall into of feeling that if they don't meet their goal (100 pounds by April), then they give up and feel that they have failed. That's a false trap, and one I would be sad if you fell into. Having a goal of losing 100 pounds is great; but sometimes our bodies don't do things on the schedule that we want.

Congratulations on making the decision to have a healthy lifestyle. Read, read, read in the different areas here on 3FC and find out what fits for you! I think I would first recommend starting to cut back on the soda pop and replacing it with diet soda (at first), unsweetened tea, or even Crystal Lite if you don't like water. Those sugary drinks can really add up, calorie wise.

Small changes really can add up. 1 pound doesn't sound like a lot, but the pounds add up and all the sudden you'll realize that your pants are falling off. So hang in there--we are here to support you!

I'm glad Windchime posted above about the 100 pound club. That's my "home base" too. If you pop over there, you'll find a lot of tough love and a tremendous amount of support.

One of the biggest surprises for me about weight loss has been that you don't have to get to goal to feel amazing. Not even close! We're the same height and I started feeling amazing and NORMAL around 199 pounds. Everything from there on down has honestly just been fun. So yes, you can not only feel better by April, you can feel better by Christmas! I dare say many of us find ourselves feeling better right away with a change in diet.

I've been down this road many, many times, but this is the most successful I've ever been. I lost my first 30 pounds just by dieting. I counted calories meticulously which worked really well. It was extremely eye opening to put a number on what I ate and it was the number one motivator for cutting out the pop!! When I was faced with some serious hunger pangs and I could either have an apple or a pop, guess which one became more enticing. Pop is a terrible addiction. I gave it up back in November, and I'll be honest...it was hard for a good four or five months. Now, nearly ten months in, I don't miss it all and don't even think about it unless I'm posting about it here.

There are many plans out there and the best plan is the one you will follow and see through. I made up my mind back in November that I wanted to be on my plan for one year, no excuses. That meant that no matter what that scale did, I was going to be on plan no matter what. That right there has been the difference between losing 30 pounds too slowly for my taste and giving up and losing the 67 pounds I've lost to date. When I got curious about how much I could lose in a year's time if I just didn't give up the scale lost all its power. I am a daily weigher and I now view my weight as one big science experiment. By weighing every day I have a really good handle on what water weight looks like.

I added exercise in about 3 months into my journey. Exercise stalled out the scale for me, but the inches melted away. Now that the fat is coming off, the muscles underneath are beautifully showing themselves. It's been very motivating. I get a way bigger kick out fitness goals, which are totally within my reach, than I get out of pounds lost. The scale is just too fickle a friend.

I too am in my 30's. Smack dab in the middle of them, actually. It's time to get this fat off!! I have a lot of living yet to do!

Hi and welcome to 3FC.

Good luck with your goals.

Hugs
Michelle

Welcome to 3FC, we are glad you are here!