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Old 09-12-2009, 11:41 PM   #1  
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Default Introduction - I'm at rock bottom with my appearance. :(

Hello. I'm really glad I found this community. I am in need of some serious accountability and support. I am so disgusted with myself and I can't even stand to look in the mirror anymore.

Six years ago I was at a healthy weight for me (150). I looked nice, felt good, and had energy. Now, a marriage and two babies later, I'm at 205 (down from 220) and I AM MISERABLE!!! I feel ugly, fat, embarrassed, tired and ashamed. Clothes don't fit right, I can't do anything physical without getting worn out and I feel like such a loser. I walk around all day trying to suck in my "gut" and when I realize I'm not I get really upset with myself. This isn't a healthy way to live!! I was athletic all my life and was never, ever skinny but I was always healthy, toned and in shape. I'm so miserable. Please help me.

...And...I'm stuck in that depression eating cycle. I just polished off an ENTIRE package of coconut macaroons, half a bag of Bugles, a package of 6 gummy hamburger candy, chocolate milk and more I can't even remember right now. That was all within the last 2 1/2 hours!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? I don't even recognize myself anymore.

My husband says I'm fine and that he isn't embarrassed by me (which I asked him yesterday) but I'm sure he wouldn't complain if he got the "old" me back! I want to do this for him also. For me first, then for him and my kids. I NEED to do this.

I'm ready for a change. I need a change. Let's go!! I started to wander around this forum at got a little overwhelmed. Where do I start? Is there a way to find an accountability partner or something like that? Help!!!!

Sorry for the whining...it helped to get it out though.

If you made it this far, thank you so much for reading this. Sorry I got so emotional! Looking forward to any responses I might get. Thank you so much!!!

Elle
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:49 PM   #2  
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Welcome!

Yup, this is the place for you. Have you done some reading? Just settle in and start posting. Come back often. The motivation, knowledge and encouragement are here for you 24/7.

We're glad you're here.
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:49 PM   #3  
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Oh yeah, I remember now. I also ate 2 Hostess chocolate cupcakes and drank a soda. That's not all for today but man, how many calories did all that add up to be??? I'm going to look now.
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:50 PM   #4  
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Thanks Susan! I've done some reading but I'm still trying to figure out what's what. This is a big forum!
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:52 PM   #5  
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Hi Elle and welcome to 3FC!


Good luck with your goals

Hugs
Michelle
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:54 PM   #6  
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Thanks, Michelle. I just checked out your progress pics and you have done so great! It makes me feel hopeful to see your success. Thanks for the welcome.
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Old 09-12-2009, 11:56 PM   #7  
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Hi Elle, welcome to this great site. You've lost 15 pounds that's a great start

Good luck
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Old 09-13-2009, 12:11 AM   #8  
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Thanks AR4life!

Well, I just tried to add up the calories of just the junk I've eaten today and it looks like that alone is my daily limit. On top of that, I ate normal meals too. No wonder I'm where I am!

Elle
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Old 09-13-2009, 12:30 AM   #9  
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Welcome ElleJay. I hope you find the help here you need. You won't find a better group of people.

One question...you mention you have kids...how old are they? Is part of your sadness post pardom depression? I don't want to assume, but thought it could be a possibility? I know after I had my little one, I had depressing thoughts as well.

Good luck on your journey!
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Old 09-13-2009, 12:59 AM   #10  
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You can do this. When I started I was so depressed and hated going anywhere. I surpassed my goal and hit my dream goal and then some. You can do this. It took me a year to lose 60 pounds, and most of that time was for the last 15. I really took my time that last 15. You are amazing; you are a mama and sacrificed your body for your family for a little while. The best part is, it is a complete lie, the weight comes off much quicker than it takes to put on. It's true that I gain and lose the same five or ten pounds rather quickly, but I give myself a lot of room because I play a ton of sports, and, man, I get hungry!

You can do this. Start tomorrow or Monday -- don't put it off any longer; sounds like you are hitting rock bottom as far as the way you feel. How did you lose 20 pounds? I did WW, at home for free, and walked -- which eventually led to running.

Keep looking at those goal photos! I was so motivated whenever I checked this site. I was addicted to 3fatchicks for a long time -- better than being addicted to my box of Snickers though.

I got tons of exercise mags, lots of healthy food options for my pantry -- along with a list of foods and recipes to turn to whenever I was bored, food journaled, and once I lost the first ten pounds -- which was the most I had ever lost in my life, I was so proud of myself.

I started at 187 and weigh 134 today. I feel great, but I know how hard it is to start. I just got sick of hating shopping, going out with friends -- I started becoming very anti-social, which is not me. I knew it was time for a change.

Good luck to you!
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Old 09-13-2009, 01:31 AM   #11  
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Elle, welcome to the forums. There is a vast amount of information and support here. Glad to have you here.
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Old 09-13-2009, 01:56 AM   #12  
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I am relatively new here also..I just passed my Junior member phase.

I did a lot of reading on this site my first 2 weeks.. The people here have the best insirational stories that kept me going through those hard first 2 weeks.

Good luck reaching your goals and welcome to the forum.
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Old 09-13-2009, 02:21 AM   #13  
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Hey, welcome. Gosh, your post really, REALLY hit home.

You can do this. We are here to help. Decide your method and full steam ahead.

Start right this very moment. I mean NOW. Not tomorrow, not Monday. NOW.
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Old 09-13-2009, 03:51 AM   #14  
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Hi and welcome. Well, now you've done all that adding up, and you know how you got here, have you decided yet how you're going to lose it? Whichever way, there is lots of good advice here. IMHO calorie counting is easiest, because it excludes no foods, just trains us to be accountable for what we do eat. You Can do this!

And change your S/C/G weights under your avatar - YOU Have Lost 15lbs already! Don't deny that, you have already been successful, and you will be more so!
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Old 09-13-2009, 04:42 AM   #15  
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Hi Elle! Welcome! This 3FC forum is great. It's big but that makes it more interesting because you can look around and start posting on different threads and sort of make a "home" to one or two if you want.

When I log on, I often go to the "new posts" link at the top of the page and see what people have posted that is new. Then I just respond to whatever strikes my fancy. Other people pick a thread where they feel comfortable, and just post there everyday. I do that also with 2 threads: 1. the positive thread lets me write a positive thing I've done every day which keeps me from falling into the sad pit. The other thread is 2. the accountability thread where I post my daily mini-goals. Maybe you could check them out and post a few times there to see how you like it. Again, welcome! CJ
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