I have only just relised!!!!
Hi this is my first post. This may sound odd but I only seemed to honestly relise how fat I have actually become in the last few months. I don't feel fat, but when I look at a picture of myself taken the other year or when I see my reflection in a window - I think OMG that really can't be me. I have always been the skinny one in the family. I was actually hospitalized once for 2 weeks because I was under weight, this was when I lived with my family as a teenager. I am now 34. I married an English man at 18 - I am American. The marriage lasted for around 3 years - I left him. It was quite an abusive marriage some physical violence - but mostly mentally and sexually abusive. When I was married to this chap I weighted 7 & 1/2 stone he used to call me fat. I left him when he went on holiday - yes, without me. It was too expensive apparently for us both to go. I found myself a flat and stayed single for several years. I looked back at pictures of myself when I was with him. One of the pictures I was wearing a tube top. I could count all of my ribs!! With the help of chocolate,crisps & mt friends I managed to put some weight on. My heaviest ever weight - a healthy 9 stone. I then met my current husband and stayed the stayed the same weight for the first 5 years that we have been together. Now thinking back on it I have probably been putting weight on for the last 3 years. We have been together for 8 years. I don't tend to buy clothes very often - a top or trousers once or twice a year, so I really didn't pay attention to the size labels. I've probably known for a long time that I was getting fatter but just ignored it. Perhaps, if I don't buy a lot of clothes - then when I do buy some new ones they will be smaller.
Anyway, I have realized that I have put too much weight on and now need to get rid of it.
I was working shifts and hubby would wait until I got home before he would eat, so sometimes I was cooking a full roast dinner when I got home at 9:30 at night - so eating at 10:30 or 11pm and then going to bed. Not good.
I work from home now, but I find that if I'm peckish I will have 2 or 3 biscuits or a packet of crisps. I have been taking note of what I eat. In the mornings we always have a cooked breakfast - Full english, scrambled eggs & salmon, bacon sandwich. Lunch is normally a cheese sandwich with crisps, Dinner I think we aways have healthy dinners - almost always homemade with little or no fat. I'll scrutinize these later.
So I know that I am eating alot of fattening things.
Three days ago I decided to start my plan!
I need to learn how to not feel that I need to eat because I am not doing anything else or because I am taking a break, Etc. And I need to get rid of my tates for certain foods. I love the flavors and textures of food when I'm eating them, or somtimes just the smell of certain foods while they are being cooked.
So I have bought myself herbalife shakes, protein powder and multi vitamins. I make a shake for 2 of my meals then have a normal 3 meal. I mix a scope of protein powder in with the shake and take 1 vitamin tablet 3 times a day. I bought this privately through amazon not through a local distributor. I don't feel hungy after my shakes, hubby still eats as normal. I choose what we are going to have for our main meal - basically what I have a craving for that day. I am going to keep using these shakes until I can get my obsession with food under control and learn a healthier diet. So far I am happy with this method. When hubby is cooking his breakfast or lunch, the smell goes through the house - lovely - but before I would have eaten it if I was hungry or not. For the last three days I haven't. I am learning self control with these shakes, which is a good thing, just because it smells nice dosen't mean that I have to eat it.
It might not be how everyone else does things, but for me, for now it is working by making me think about what I have been eating and I am quite shocked.
Any way I would like to hear about anyones views on where I am and where I am going. And any help or advise they might have.
|
Cut calories, but be sure that you are getting the right nutrition and your body will adapt better. 