I think the women feel that by your presence, they are being judged. This isn't your fault.
Funnily enough I've had this in relation to my vegetarianism. If I mention to someone I'm vegetarian, this may cause some to talk endlessly about their love of meat. My husband's friend expressed interest in trying a vegetarian restaurant so we took him to one and the entire time he talked about meat. The funny thing is that isn't an unusual phenomenon at that restaurant as I've overheard similar things at other tables in the restaurant when someone who isn't vegetarian goes to a vegetarian restaurant. It is odd and obviously the last thing a vegetarian wants to hear is someone talk endlessly about meat but I think it is just something that makes them feel as if they are being judged even if they aren't.
LOl @ Garnet. Thats pretty much my fantasy responses too. The Marilyn Monroe one is used SO often and you just need to google her to see she wasn't a 16 by any stretch of the imagination. She was curvy and beautiful but she wasn't plus size and theres plenty and i mean plenty of plus size models that are just downright stunning but they never bring them up its always classic marilyn. At 201lbs I am not a twig. I am a solid size 10-12 depending on brand. But in my culture weight is seen very differently. In a normal society I'd be fat. Here people complain about my arms being too thin lmao. There are plenty of tiny ppl in Nfld but theres far more morbidly obese people and tonnes of ppl size 12-18 thats pretty much the normal 12-18.
I think the women feel that by your presence, they are being judged. This isn't your fault.
Funnily enough I've had this in relation to my vegetarianism. If I mention to someone I'm vegetarian, this may cause some to talk endlessly about their love of meat. My husband's friend expressed interest in trying a vegetarian restaurant so we took him to one and the entire time he talked about meat. The funny thing is that isn't an unusual phenomenon at that restaurant as I've overheard similar things at other tables in the restaurant when someone who isn't vegetarian goes to a vegetarian restaurant. It is odd and obviously the last a vegetarian wants to hear is someone talk endlessly about meat but I think it is just something that makes them feel as if they are being judged even if they aren't.
Lol. I can't eat red meat due to my health now unless its like 3 ounces every few weeks, like a treat, so I buy a lot of soy and tofu fo-meats as I call them and I get the 'well im not a rabbit' talk a lot or the 'man I love burgers' basically any meat they can think of or the 'well studies have shown that red meat is actually good...' etc etc and I'm like ok but I get violently ill when I eat too much of it so I'm just gonna eat my small amount of chicken and this hunk of tofu in bbq sauce :P but thanks for your opinion. And now if people eat food her they ask me if its fake like my foods tainted cause I've had to replace my red meats and cut down on white by a lot. XD I think they are afraid I'm gonna feed them TVP instead of hamburger meat, like I'm a sneaky veggie lover lmao
Wow - this is nuts. What woman isn't a real woman? (Well, I guess I've seen a few heavily augmented individuals...)
And as for the 'what men want' thing.... Jeez, if there was one universal truth to that I guess it would be a pretty boring world. I know my tastes in men aren't always the same as other women's - and a good thing, too.
Sorry the people around you are being like that. I would be more than irritated if that was the case here, but seriously, good job sticking to your plan when everyone around you is trying to stop you.
When I was reading through the thread,
Quote:
Originally Posted by CherryQuinn
...I can't eat red meat due to my health now
caught my eye.
If I were you, I would use this. I am not sure what it is about your health that prohibits meat, but I would use it to your advantage. Make sure all these people judging you KNOW what is wrong.
I have ulcers. I had my gallbladder removed a couple years ago and it still gives me fits. I CANNOT eat anything greasy, tomato sauce.. stuff like that. Pizza can make me super sick. There are foods that if I put them in my stomach will make me curl up in a ball in pain. I cannot have caffeine regularly due to my heart issues, although I will have a soda on occasion.
Everyone knows it. If I am offered something to eat now, it goes like "Do you want some ________________, or can you eat that?" Nobody is shitty to me like they have been before when I was just dieting. I was actually very sick though and the people around me saw me go to endless doctors to find out what was wrong. Nevertheless, nobody questions my food choices anymore. Maybe it will work for you, too.
Sorry the people around you are being like that. I would be more than irritated if that was the case here, but seriously, good job sticking to your plan when everyone around you is trying to stop you.
When I was reading through the thread, caught my eye.
If I were you, I would use this. I am not sure what it is about your health that prohibits meat, but I would use it to your advantage. Make sure all these people judging you KNOW what is wrong.
I have ulcers. I had my gallbladder removed a couple years ago and it still gives me fits. I CANNOT eat anything greasy, tomato sauce.. stuff like that. Pizza can make me super sick. There are foods that if I put them in my stomach will make me curl up in a ball in pain. I cannot have caffeine regularly due to my heart issues, although I will have a soda on occasion.
Everyone knows it. If I am offered something to eat now, it goes like "Do you want some ________________, or can you eat that?" Nobody is shitty to me like they have been before when I was just dieting. I was actually very sick though and the people around me saw me go to endless doctors to find out what was wrong. Nevertheless, nobody questions my food choices anymore. Maybe it will work for you, too.
I have gallbladder stones and possible other issues with food that are being tested currently, the people around me know this but unfortunately that doesn't stop their rants if I don't eat what they are eating
My sister in law is a gorgeously proportioned, beautiful skinny blond. Even at my tiniest, I will never even come close to looking as good as her. Since I've started to lose weight, she's become downright nasty to me. She's threatened. Why am I a threat? Because at a high weight I was a "Safe look down", and because no one handles change well
Everybody does this. Well, most. Even I've done this. It's human nature to look for ways that we can "one up" others. You feel a little "better" than someone if you're lighter. So in some very shallow people that are missing the guilt switch that's supposed to be tripped by this feeling, it brings out some really nasty.
For a lot of people though too, it's just change. You've changed your body, so maybe you've changed the type of person you are. Maybe you will think you're better than them. Maybe you'll start to judge their habits. Maybe you'll just pull back and be out of their lives.
Just politely refuse to engage, and reassure those that are closer to you that you're not going anywhere.
My response would be, "Cool story, bro." and move on with my life.
Don't waste your time on idiots. Life is too short for that.
Additionally, this would make me question my "Friends" because true friends support you and want the best for you (regardless of what they want for themselves.)
I agree with Bargoo and the others who have said that these people are just in denial and are deluding themselves. Your weight loss exposes the giant cracks in their flawed viewpoint, and they don't like it.
Just one question: I know you said that the community in which you live doesn't consider your starting weight "fat", just "extra" -- whatever that means. If 335 pounds is "extra", what weight do they believe IS bad? Does one have to lose the ability to walk - and have to resort to the use of a mobility scooter to get around, in order for it to be a problem? Or would that be ok too? Would you have to be bed-ridden and completely unable to leave your house? I mean, really?
I agree with Bargoo and the others who have said that these people are just in denial and are deluding themselves. Your weight loss exposes the giant cracks in their flawed viewpoint, and they don't like it.
Just one question: I know you said that the community in which you live doesn't consider your starting weight "fat", just "extra" -- whatever that means. If 335 pounds is "extra", what weight do they believe IS bad? Does one have to lose the ability to walk - and have to resort to the use of a mobility scooter to get around, in order for it to be a problem? Or would that be ok too? Would you have to be bed-ridden and completely unable to leave your house? I mean, really?
Lol. It can be pretty terrifying whats considered normal here. Diebetes is rampant as is high blood pressure and numerous cancers and its not uncommon to see people in their 40s in a scooter. We are the fattest province in Canada. :P it means 'extra to love' Lol. Generally here if you can still walk people don't mention weight
When i was 335 I had a bad liver, high blood pressure, blood sugar problems, couldn't breathe right at night or if I walked, I couldn't go up stairs, my chest hurt all the time. Now I'm not perfect but I'm feeling better than I did then. So the whole its just junk science that weight hurts you just blows my mind.
well, to the extent that you *want* to make any response, this would be a good one.
But I also agree that people who are rude and nasty don't really deserve much of your time and energy, so I probably wouldn't even bother and just try to avoid these conversations and spending time with these people as much as possible.
Wow ... makes me want to move there so for once I can feel "fit"!
Anyway, sorry you are dealing with this stuff. Sounds to me like its other people's insecurities projecting on you. They probably feel like you are judging them with every healthy choice you make (even thought you are not). I would just chalk it off to them having their own issues - but if it gets to you, find new friends to spend time with.
I would advice first just honestly telling them those comments hurt in a polite way and see if that stops it.
My response would be, "Cool story, bro." and move on with my life.
Don't waste your time on idiots. Life is too short for that.
Additionally, this would make me question my "Friends" because true friends support you and want the best for you (regardless of what they want for themselves.)
that made me lol!
Too true. I might start thinking about finding new people to hang out with. These ones sound like negative duds. Like honestly, who SAYS that? There HAS to be someone in Newfoundland around your area that's a normal, kind, supportive, positive human being that you can hang around with?
Too true. I might start thinking about finding new people to hang out with. These ones sound like negative duds. Like honestly, who SAYS that? There HAS to be someone in Newfoundland around your area that's a normal, kind, supportive, positive human being that you can hang around with?
Theres a few that aren't like that, mainly my best friend and fiance. So lately ive been sticking to them more and more. Like a barnacle :P
I would be more than irritated if that was the case here, but seriously, good job sticking to your plan when everyone around you is trying to stop you. 
that made me lol!