Do what you feel is right and go with the flow. Don't worry about how your thighs look, he won't care. I'm sure you look great.
There is nothing wrong with groping, kissing, fingering, etc. If you are attracted to him and know that this won't ruin the friendship by going farther, then do it. But, if you held onto your virginity for this long ,just give it a thought before you give it away. I agree with everyone and make sure he's tested. That is so important.
No decent guy will ever think you not having experience is a bad thing. I personally waited because I couldn't see myself doing anything without an emotional attachment. My husband was my first and only, same for him. If you can have sex just to have sex and enjoy it, and he's clean, go for it. But make sure it's what YOU want to do. It's your life, and only you can decide what's right for you.
Reverend Boteright: You know, Rory, being a young lady comes with many gifts. Your virtue, for example, is a gift, a precious gift, possibly the most precious gift you possess.
Rory: Uh huh...
Reverend Boteright: You want to give this gift very carefully. It is a gift you can only give to one man. Once you give it, it's gone, you cant re-gift it. If you give it away too soon, to the wrong man, then when the right one does come along, you have no gift to give... you'll have to buy him a sweater. Do you understand what I'm saying?
Rory: No.
Reverend Boteright: Think long and hard about when and to whom you want to give the ultimate gift you have to give away.
Rory: Oh.
Reverend Boteright: Yes.
Rory: Oh dear...
Reverend Boteright: Oh dear indeed.
Rory: Um, well, listen, reverend, I really appreciate you taking the time out of what I assume is a busy day to come here and talk to me about... all of this, but I'm afraid the ultimate gift ship has sailed.
Reverend Boteright: What?
Rory: A while ago... it's probably in Fiji by now.
I know its from gilmore girls, lol, but its true. Once you go down that path, once you "give that gift", there is never any going back. EVER. Make sure you are ready to go. And that you're "all packed up" if you know what I mean. A lot of times one thing, ie: fingering, leads to another... I'd want you to be prepared for.. another.
Good luck.
Haha good one!! I was thinking of exactly the same GG scene when i read her post on giving a "gift".
to the original poster - look he can tell what you look like with clothes on and he obviously finds you attractive. So find yourself attractive and relax and go as far as you are comfortable. Good luck!!
I felt the same way when I first started doing the naughty. And 10 years later I am still a little uncomfortable with my body, but it gets better. And if a man is with you it means he doesnt care about a little chub lol. I would lay down rather than sit down, and I would first start with some teasing and forplay to get yourself loosened up and feelen good about yourself. Go on girl get you some.
I'm so curious to find out how this all played out! I'm so nosy!!! My opinion, for what it's worth, is to forget about it. The FWB thing never works out the way you think it will ( I have no experience with this personally, just have comforted a LOT of girlfriends who've been heartbroken). Besides, why waste messing around with someone you're not totally bonkers and hot for?? seems kinda boring without the crazy passion!
I'm one of those crazy late bloomers myself! I had zero experience when I met my hubby, but I was insane for him (still am!!) so the fireworks were amazing! I say wait til the right one, it'll be worth it!
I'm so curious to find out how this all played out! I'm so nosy!!!
Ha, I'm curious too! I didn't comment earlier, but I'm one of those women who does like the FWB situation because I don't like being in a relationship, but I still have a sexual appetite.
I find that many of my friends are absolutely not the same way. They do want a relationship and therefore get their feelings hurt when they ignore the "friends" part and think that the "benefits" make a relationship.
Until you know how you feel toward sex and dating, this is a situation you may want to avoid.
*You're insecure about your body with this person. If you had stronger feelings for him, and him for you, you probably wouldn't. You'd know that the size of your thighs wouldn't make a lick of difference to him.
* You're worried that he'll perceive you as a tease now. People can change their minds, even at the very last minute, so certainly it's okay at this point. If there was mutual respect in this friendship, you wouldn't give it a thought.
* You're a virgin. You have probably had other opportunities to engage in this type of casual encounter in the past 5 years, and you haven't. Probably because that little voice inside you has been whispering that you want it to be special the first time. That probably hasn't changed.
Just my thoughts... my last bit of advice is to listen carefully to your own inner voice and you won't go wrong. You already know what you want to do.
Ha, I'm curious too! I didn't comment earlier, but I'm one of those women who does like the FWB situation because I don't like being in a relationship, but I still have a sexual appetite.
I find that many of my friends are absolutely not the same way. They do want a relationship and therefore get their feelings hurt when they ignore the "friends" part and think that the "benefits" make a relationship.
Until you know how you feel toward sex and dating, this is a situation you may want to avoid.
This is very good advice. No point getting your feelings hurt and possibly besmirching your entire outlook on sex from a bad or anticlimactic experience.
