I think that even if the "real" stats of folks who lose on a healthy, lifestyle-based plan are close to the WW numbers, that's still pretty disheartening...only 1 in 5 still at goal after 5 years. And again, that's from people who have already reached a defined goal and maintained for some period of time - a huge majority of people don't achieve that. I'm pretty confident that if the statistic was "percentage of people who start a healthy weight loss program and are not within 5 lbs of their goal at the 5 year mark", you'd be very close to that 95% number, if not higher.
Which is not to say that aspiring to a healthier lifestyle isn't a good thing, or that more people ought not to do it. But, to me at least, saying "It's not OK to be fat" implies that there is a successful, reasonably achievable way that we/science/etc know and can implement to NOT be fat anymore, and I don't think the numbers bear that out.
I found your post by accident and it got me thinking as to why I was on this site and I just felt compelled to respond.
Why is it that we must all be boxed into categories? Male or female, young or old, short or tall, black or white, rich or poor, fat or skinny.........
More importantly, why are we so pressured into going along with "the boxing."
I'm just tired of feeling sick and tired. My joints hurt, my back hurts, I have no energy, I tire easy, my cardiologist is concerned because my cholesterol, triglycerides and blood pressure are alarmingly high, I'm pissed because I can't do the things I want to do and I don't want to feel like this anymore. If I felt good at my current weight, I'd be fine and accept it, but I don't. Therefore, I'm going to get healthy and feel good. This means losing weight.
Just my 2 cents.
Last edited by Chubbie Chick; 04-10-2014 at 12:07 PM.
I believe that if you sincerely have a problem with yourself being fat and it's causing you medical issues, that or you make yourself and everyone else around you miserable by talking **** about yourself then you need to do something about it. If you're fine in emotional, mental, and physical health and you're still considered obese or overweight, just be yourself. My weight just so happens to **** up all three areas in my life. Might make me shallow towards myself but I'm telling you right now that I wasn't meant to have this body. It doesn't match who I am on the inside. I think it's bullshit to be self deceptive if its ruining your quality of life. "Oh I'm okay with it I will accept myself even though I cry about my weight every day, I don't have much energy, my sex life is suffering, I can't have kids, but everything is a-ok!" NOT! it's cool to be yourself but if it's ****ing with your life you need to make a positive change for your own sake. Just my two cents lol
I think the focus should be on health. Obviously if you're morbidly obese, no matter how confident you feel about yourself, you're not healthy. If you're a bit overweight but your health stats are all amazing, then by all means! Let's accept fat! I always weighted 20lbs more than I was supposed to and was EXTREMELY healthy! I was very athletic, ate well, slept well... not one problem. So I don't see anything wrong with those extra 20lbs I used to carry around.
The problem came with the extra 20 lbs I put on during my first pregnancy, and the 20 more I put on between my first and second baby, and the other 10 I put on after baby #2. Those were unnecessary and not healthy whatsoever, and that's what I'm working on right now.
I'm rather sad to read so many people say that obese people should not accept their fat and that they should try to be healthier. Fat is hard to accept in ourselves and in others. We see it as a physical manifestation of everything that is wrong in this world.
But it is possible to love yourself at any weight. We can strive to be healthier but people overlook that fact that the most important step in good health is nourishing yourself with acceptance! You have to care about yourself, love yourself, enjoy yourself, feel confidence and ease within your mind. Otherwise, what's the point? "If I lose 30lbs I will love myself by default!" is getting us nowhere. Because people do lose that 30lbs and find out "Oh, I still don't really care much for myself after all."
Diets absolutely cause more gains, I see it on the boards every single unfortunate day. "Hi, I'm back, and I gained a bunch of weight again" is like a loop, let's see who's back with a regain today! We don't teach people how to eat balanced meals when they're young, we rely on processed foods to make meals easy and accessible, and then when they get big we tell them to stop eating the foods we offered them. School lunch programs are abysmal, health and physical activity are nearly non-existant and not emphasized as important and that is exacrcerbated by the overwhelming pressure of standardized testing and imbalanced emphasis on academic rigor, and stress levels of the average American far exceeds that of any nation, I'm certain of that.
And of course, the american health system is so expensive that preventative measures don't have a stab in the dark at taking their rightful place of primary importance. Basically, we set people up to be unhealthy and then judge and criticize them for not being healthy. The food industry spends gazillions of dollars making food unavoidable and then society judges us for eating it. When in NYC the mayor was trying to propose a tax on sweetened drinks over 16oz there was a huge uproar over it, we want to do whatever the heck we want and anytime the government tries to rectify the situation we won't allow it.
It is our personal responsibility to get healthy and stay healthy. But the odds are sadly stocked against us. And so we turned to a multi-billion dollar diet industry to solve our problems except that those tactics don't work either. If they did, they wouldn't be necessary anymore. We're being taught all the wrong things and then punished for not getting the right results.
I'm not huge on the fat acceptance movement because it so often turns into anti -skinny rhetoric. "Skinny *****" is not any better than "fat slob".
But: Devil's advocate; I'm 371 pounds. Even on a big frame, I'm carrying at least 150 extra pounds, but my blood work is perfect. I can run, do long laps in the pool and I spent a week last fall hiking Yellowstone with no ill effects. I do not suffer depression, blood sugar issues or joint pain, and even before I lost the first 100, I was in good health. Could I do more with less weight? Most likely. But at this point because I am actively taking care of myself, why wouldn't I love and be proud of what my body can do, especially when I can do more and have better health stats than many of the "just a little overweight" or "perfect weight" people do?
Burl Ives spent most of his 85 years at over 300 pounds and wasn't sick until the last years of his life. My grandfather weighed the same thing his entire adult life, 60 pounds over what was considered a "healthy weight". He was 90 when he died, and he died in his sleep. It's not an automatic death sentence, and it's wrong to assume that anyone carrying extra weight is living on jelly donuts and not getting any exercise. Every once in a while, somebody is just "built like that".
Again - I'm just showing another side, because I have no desire to remain this big. And I think if you start screaming 'fat acceptance' and run out of breath in the middle of your rant, you need to reevaluate your priorities. However, society did this. WE NEVER MADE IT ABOUT HEALTH. We made it about appearances. We told people (women especially) that they weren't as valuable or beautiful if they didn't fit a mold. And people are sick of it, and they're fighting back. Unfortunately instead of throwing out the scale and focusing on proving what they can do (and getting healthier in the process), they're just raising a middle finger to world.
I'm rather sad to read so many people say that obese people should not accept their fat and that they should try to be healthier. Fat is hard to accept in ourselves and in others. We see it as a physical manifestation of everything that is wrong in this world.
But it is possible to love yourself at any weight. We can strive to be healthier but people overlook that fact that the most important step in good health is nourishing yourself with acceptance! You have to care about yourself, love yourself, enjoy yourself, feel confidence and ease within your mind. Otherwise, what's the point? "If I lose 30lbs I will love myself by default!" is getting us nowhere. Because people do lose that 30lbs and find out "Oh, I still don't really care much for myself after all."
Diets absolutely cause more gains, I see it on the boards every single unfortunate day. "Hi, I'm back, and I gained a bunch of weight again" is like a loop, let's see who's back with a regain today! We don't teach people how to eat balanced meals when they're young, we rely on processed foods to make meals easy and accessible, and then when they get big we tell them to stop eating the foods we offered them. School lunch programs are abysmal, health and physical activity are nearly non-existant and not emphasized as important and that is exacrcerbated by the overwhelming pressure of standardized testing and imbalanced emphasis on academic rigor, and stress levels of the average American far exceeds that of any nation, I'm certain of that.
And of course, the american health system is so expensive that preventative measures don't have a stab in the dark at taking their rightful place of primary importance. Basically, we set people up to be unhealthy and then judge and criticize them for not being healthy. The food industry spends gazillions of dollars making food unavoidable and then society judges us for eating it. When in NYC the mayor was trying to propose a tax on sweetened drinks over 16oz there was a huge uproar over it, we want to do whatever the heck we want and anytime the government tries to rectify the situation we won't allow it.
It is our personal responsibility to get healthy and stay healthy. But the odds are sadly stocked against us. And so we turned to a multi-billion dollar diet industry to solve our problems except that those tactics don't work either. If they did, they wouldn't be necessary anymore. We're being taught all the wrong things and then punished for not getting the right results.
I see what you're trying to say, but I think we all have to be realistic with ourselves. Sometimes it's NOT okay. If you have 5 kids that need you around but you're just so into yourself at say like 300 lbs, that's unhealthy for anyone! You have to have some responsibility for yourself and your children because it gets to the point where it's not all about you. And let's be honest. If we decide to make a change to our bodies can we say that we were satisfied originally with it? Sure, you have to accept the situation but the acceptence...If you accept anything less than the best for yourself in your eyes you are only cheating yourself. I'm not saying this to be politically correct LOL just trying to be honest here.
Another point i'd like to add real quick; Obesity is a disease. A disease that can be controlled and even cured. I'm not sure about you all but when i hear disease, I'd want to rid myself of it, that's just me! So that being said, if you are informed on your health and health in general, yet you choose to continue going down the path to self destruction, that's pretty ignorant in my opinion.
I think the issue is that while some overweight and obese people may be in good health, others just THINK they are - and either they don't get an annual physical to find out for sure, or their doctors aren't being honest with them about how their weight is affecting their health. From personal experience, my doctor has never so much as even mentioned the fact that I am obese. Even when I started experiencing asthma again, they didn't talk about physical activity with me, they just prescribed an inhaler. When my BP was a little high? No mention of my weight or nutrition.
It's an embarrassing thing to bring up to a doctor. I can understand why so many of us put our blinders on to the whole thing and just go on like everything is honky dory until we have our personal wake-up call.
Hope I didn't go too off track there...
Edited to say...my post didn't take appearances or loving oneself into account at all. I'm just speaking to health. I am jealous of women who love their bodies at ANY size and think that is an incredible thing to be able to do and something that should be encouraged.
Last edited by nonameslob; 04-11-2014 at 12:49 PM.
I think the issue is that while some overweight and obese people may be in good health, others just THINK they are - and either they don't get an annual physical to find out for sure, or their doctors aren't being honest with them about how their weight is affecting their health. From personal experience, my doctor has never so much as even mentioned the fact that I am obese. Even when I started experiencing asthma again, they didn't talk about physical activity with me, they just prescribed an inhaler. When my BP was a little high? No mention of my weight or nutrition.
It's an embarrassing thing to bring up to a doctor. I can understand why so many of us put our blinders on to the whole thing and just go on like everything is honky dory until we have our personal wake-up call.
Hope I didn't go too off track there...
Edited to say...my post didn't take appearances or loving oneself into account at all. I'm just speaking to health. I am jealous of women who love their bodies at ANY size and think that is an incredible thing to be able to do and something that should be encouraged.
We would all be way better off if the prescription was more often physical activity and better diet than beta blockers and steroids. An ounce of prevention still is worth a pound of cure.
I see what you're trying to say, but I think we all have to be realistic with ourselves. Sometimes it's NOT okay. If you have 5 kids that need you around but you're just so into yourself at say like 300 lbs, that's unhealthy for anyone! You have to have some responsibility for yourself and your children because it gets to the point where it's not all about you. And let's be honest. If we decide to make a change to our bodies can we say that we were satisfied originally with it? Sure, you have to accept the situation but the acceptence...If you accept anything less than the best for yourself in your eyes you are only cheating yourself. I'm not saying this to be politically correct LOL just trying to be honest here.
I'm curious, what did you infer from my post? Because I wasn't saying that people should live their fat. I dislike the fat acceptance movement because of the reasons radiojane listed - it emphasizes loving fat, hating skinny. Not for me.
I was advocating that people approach themselves with kindness. The pressure to diet and lose weight has caused a lot of self loathing. Dieting instructs us to avoid certain foods but if we dare to cheat we tend to feel awful about ourselves. Constantly checking out process on the scale can cause major giddiness if the scale is moving the right way and extreme self loathing if it went the wrong way. We are so self critical, there is no room in our consciousness to anything other extreme success or extreme failure. That's what yoyoing is all about.
If you're anything like me you've got torturous negative thoughts about yourself. "I'm so far today" "why can't I stick to this diet?" "Look at how huge my a$$ is" "I'm the fattest person in the room!" I've found that a little work towards countering these negative thoughts goes a long eat in helping me build a better self esteem. And because my self esteem is better I'm making better and more rational food decisions. Think of a child, how do you motivate a child? You tell them that can do it, they're talented, they're worthy! You foster their self esteem and then they feel nurtured and secure enough to believe in themselves.
But what do we do? We punish ourselves, tell outselves we deserve to be ft and then we wonder why we continue to fail.
I'm curious, what did you infer from my post? Because I wasn't saying that people should live their fat. I dislike the fat acceptance movement because of the reasons radiojane listed - it emphasizes loving fat, hating skinny. Not for me.
I was advocating that people approach themselves with kindness. The pressure to diet and lose weight has caused a lot of self loathing. Dieting instructs us to avoid certain foods but if we dare to cheat we tend to feel awful about ourselves. Constantly checking out process on the scale can cause major giddiness if the scale is moving the right way and extreme self loathing if it went the wrong way. We are so self critical, there is no room in our consciousness to anything other extreme success or extreme failure. That's what yoyoing is all about.
If you're anything like me you've got torturous negative thoughts about yourself. "I'm so far today" "why can't I stick to this diet?" "Look at how huge my a$$ is" "I'm the fattest person in the room!" I've found that a little work towards countering these negative thoughts goes a long eat in helping me build a better self esteem. And because my self esteem is better I'm making better and more rational food decisions. Think of a child, how do you motivate a child? You tell them that can do it, they're talented, they're worthy! You foster their self esteem and then they feel nurtured and secure enough to believe in themselves.
But what do we do? We punish ourselves, tell outselves we deserve to be ft and then we wonder why we continue to fail.
some of what you are talking about is called internalised oppression. We take in the monster who beats up and it takes on our own voice.
and we don't even know it is happening.
and we oppress each other when we point fingers and whisper or say, 'she is so fat,' 'she is such a failure'...
Love -- real genuine love of self and other -- has the capacity to change the world.
If we can begin to genuinely love ourselves, take responsibility for ourselves, be kind and when needed firm and/or forgiving with ourselves, the world really can change.
I'm curious, what did you infer from my post? Because I wasn't saying that people should live their fat. I dislike the fat acceptance movement because of the reasons radiojane listed - it emphasizes loving fat, hating skinny. Not for me.
I was advocating that people approach themselves with kindness. The pressure to diet and lose weight has caused a lot of self loathing. Dieting instructs us to avoid certain foods but if we dare to cheat we tend to feel awful about ourselves. Constantly checking out process on the scale can cause major giddiness if the scale is moving the right way and extreme self loathing if it went the wrong way. We are so self critical, there is no room in our consciousness to anything other extreme success or extreme failure. That's what yoyoing is all about.
If you're anything like me you've got torturous negative thoughts about yourself. "I'm so far today" "why can't I stick to this diet?" "Look at how huge my a$$ is" "I'm the fattest person in the room!" I've found that a little work towards countering these negative thoughts goes a long eat in helping me build a better self esteem. And because my self esteem is better I'm making better and more rational food decisions. Think of a child, how do you motivate a child? You tell them that can do it, they're talented, they're worthy! You foster their self esteem and then they feel nurtured and secure enough to believe in themselves.
But what do we do? We punish ourselves, tell outselves we deserve to be ft and then we wonder why we continue to fail.
That's why it's best to consider your changes in activity and eating as a lifestyle change not a diet per say. People take the whole diet thing as "Okay, I have to do this for a set number of days or so then I can be skinny and then go back to my old ways". No, it's got to be a complete transformation the way you go about things. Just because you might mess up one day doesn't make you a complete failure because we're all about the indulge sometimes. I think it has to do with personality as well. I was never the type to feel sorry for myself (not inferring you do) I'm just the type that sees yes there is a problem, it needs to be fixed, I wont be perfect at it, but it will get done! I mean for anyone out there reading this, im just 20 years old and I don't know it all but what I do know is it doesn't help feeling sorry for yourselves. Acknowledge you have a problem, disregarding the fact how you might "feel" about yourself. And that's another issue as well the harder you are on yourself, the more guilty you feel and if you're an emotional eater, you're ****ed so...yeah I can see what you mean by being kind to yourself, but never expect perfection and don't wallow in self pity when you fail, get back up and fight like a ***** so you can be proud of what you see in the mirror. This is coming from someone who still is never easy on herself but I am realistic and determined. again, it goes back to personality.[/B]
I think the issue is that while some overweight and obese people may be in good health, others just THINK they are - and either they don't get an annual physical to find out for sure, or their doctors aren't being honest with them about how their weight is affecting their health. From personal experience, my doctor has never so much as even mentioned the fact that I am obese. Even when I started experiencing asthma again, they didn't talk about physical activity with me, they just prescribed an inhaler. When my BP was a little high? No mention of my weight or nutrition.
It's an embarrassing thing to bring up to a doctor. I can understand why so many of us put our blinders on to the whole thing and just go on like everything is honky dory until we have our personal wake-up call.
Hope I didn't go too off track there...
Edited to say...my post didn't take appearances or loving oneself into account at all. I'm just speaking to health. I am jealous of women who love their bodies at ANY size and think that is an incredible thing to be able to do and something that should be encouraged.
You made amazing points! I think sometimes it just helps being honest with ourselves. When I was in the 7th grade I started noticing my periods were disappearing, and so became the starting of my PCOS... THEN there came a time when my friends mom randomly checked my blood sugar and lord behold my rating was sky high and she was surprised I wasn't admitted into a hospital but for real after I lost a significant amount of weight my sugar is great and periods have returned! But I hate it when people try to tell you nice things just to keep your self esteem intact but I find a swift kick in the rear is a great motivator lol
I don't wallow in self pity. And I think "lifestyle change" is just another word for diet. I don't fall of horses or get back on. I can't relate to that mentality anymore in any way other than I used to do that.
