We had a little "hiccup" last night that resulted in tears and a deep need of one of us jumping on the next plane!!! I went to bed in not such a good way! He worked the night shift last night and didn't fair well either.
Fortunately, we had a "reality check" conversation today. We realized all of this was based on the fact that we truly love each other, need to see each other, missing the **** out of each other and so on! The ultimate conclusion was that we need to take the advice we're always telling others to heart. To take one day at a time and to go from there.
I feel much better today. I was very busy on an assignment and was not able to receive his calls and texts. The alone time was good for both of us in this sense.
All I know is the love is real. Whatever happens from here on out is a mystery to us. As of now, we take this journey together one day at a time.
Oh god, those are the WORST nights to get through, seriously!
Me and mine have had several good ones over the past 6 months that resulted in that "reality check" talk, tears on both sides (and THAT'S saying something for a guy from a macho culture to do!), etc.... and of course, realizing that literally 90% of it is stemming from our frustration of wanting to be together, in person. *sigh* Each time it's happened, I've felt like my whole world was knocked for a loop during the hours (or days) that it took to recover and get over it completely. Like.... literally, it felt like everything was upside down, someone had removed my intestines, and I break into tears at any given moment including at work. And he always feels the same way.
For some reason... when we're fighting... it's like the world will never be right again unless we figure it out. Seriously. In all the many relationships I've ever had.... never felt anything near that!
One thing we've noticed though... each time this happens... for some odd reason... we're closer than ever. We kinda look at it as a learning process. Each obstacle we hurtle, the stronger our bond is.... each thing we get over... the more we understand and love about each other. Granted, there are a few things that we've come to impasse' over, but I figure that everything comes with time. In fact... there's so few of those, I figure I should probably count my blessings.
Sunshine..... one day at a time chica, one day at a time! When will you guys be seeing each other next?
Sunshine..... one day at a time chica, one day at a time! When will you guys be seeing each other next?
Once again, I totally relate to everything you posted.
We didn't have plans to see each other again until late July/early August. However, after our "hiccup the other day, we're trying to hook up within the next few weeks. We were on Southwests' website last night. Checked back tonight and they've already increased their rates!!!
His birthday is next week and I want to be his birthday present!!!
The weird thing is the last time we saw each other was as friends only. This will be the first time we're together as more than that. I can only imagine what to expect. Excitement is not enough to say how I feel.
Sunshine - You bring back a lot of memories for me. When my husband and I were talking at the very beginning of our relationship and hadn't seen eachother other than friends, I was very tentative. I probably hadn't seen him in nearly a year and there definitely wasn't any attraction between us at that point. I knew how I felt on the phone towards him but I wasn't sure if once I saw him again if I'd feel like he was just a friend or if I'd truly feel more for him. Once I saw him I knew though that I cared/loved him as soon as I saw him.
Are you definitely going to go then? You HAVE to keep us posted about what happens....! I'm so rooting for you! Can't wait to hear what happens.
And I feel you on the plane ticket thing... I'm going to be buying mine by this time next month, or Aug 1st at the latest... and my god, they're already about $1400. I keep on checking and praying they don't go up anymore! Yeesh...
Sunshine - You bring back a lot of memories for me. When my husband and I were talking at the very beginning of our relationship and hadn't seen eachother other than friends, I was very tentative. I probably hadn't seen him in nearly a year and there definitely wasn't any attraction between us at that point. I knew how I felt on the phone towards him but I wasn't sure if once I saw him again if I'd feel like he was just a friend or if I'd truly feel more for him. Once I saw him I knew though that I cared/loved him as soon as I saw him.
It's good to know there's hope. I so don't feel that way right now. We had another "hiccup" yesterday which resulted in us not speaking to each other all day! He cut his phone off and I was absolutely miserable! We spoke early this morning but it was really awkard. We haven't been in touch since.
Are you definitely going to go then? You HAVE to keep us posted about what happens....! I'm so rooting for you! Can't wait to hear what happens.
And I feel you on the plane ticket thing... I'm going to be buying mine by this time next month, or Aug 1st at the latest... and my god, they're already about $1400. I keep on checking and praying they don't go up anymore! Yeesh...
Thanks!
I honestly don't know where we are right now. At our last conversation this morning, it didn't feel very good. I actually text him this mornig after we hung up and I wasn't very nice. I typed, "After all this, I'm going to bump you back down to 'friend only' status!!!" I haven't heard from him since. Yet I'm stubborn enough not to contact him either!
We finally spoke to each other, well via text, since the ugly comments I made. It was kind of a so-so conversation. I was on an assignment when he first text me so I wasn't able to call him right away. When I finally was free to call, his phone was off again. I left him a message to call 'cuz we need to talk. Haven't heard from him as of yet. today
My one piece of advice is that sometimes you will make eachother angry but don't ever hang up the phone. Don't ever refuse to talk to eachother. You can certainly say something like "I don't think right now is the right time to talk".
Although I think this is an agreement that you both have to make. I think it is counterproductive to a long distance relationship to refuse to talk. As I said, its ok to take time to yourself but express that in a discussion.
We've spoken since the last time I posted. We hashed everything out and have squashed our disagreement. I think it all boiled down to the frustrations of not being able to see each other. We've made plans to see each other more often. I even have a few conferences/workshops scheduled within Louisiana and neighboring states. He's working on the same.
I was ready to give up on the LDR but because we've been friends for so long, I couldn't see life without him. Now that we've crossed the bridge to more than just a friendship, I value our relationship even more.
Again, one day at a time is what's going to help us survive. We're going to see where each day takes us into the future. As of this moment, all I know is that I truly love him and he loves me.
I'm glad I was able to express myself by posting here with others who understand what it's like to go through this. No matter what, we have to keep this thread going.
I was ready to give up on the LDR but because we've been friends for so long, I couldn't see life without him. Now that we've crossed the bridge to more than just a friendship, I value our relationship even more.
I know EXACTLY what you mean when you say that! I feel the same way! It's almost scary though, because when I think of us breaking it off relationship wise (god forbid that ever happens) I really get despondent thinking of losing him from my life. Unfortunately, by taking a friendship to the next level, the chance of losing that person from your life completely rears its ugly head.
I literally get that panic attack feeling inside when I think of losing him!
I'm glad that you guys worked it out Sunshine! And like everyone else said, the whole fight and hang up thing really IS sucky when you're in an LDR, but me and my guy are way, way guilty of that. Me much more than him. And we've had fights where it only lasted for one call and we straightened it out by the next.... and a few really hard ones that definitely took a few days to get our feelings out completely and make up. Those awkward, so-so calls that you were describing are horrible! You just feel so miserable and bottled up inside that you want to scream! At the same time, the whole LDR aspect of it seems to come out even more pronounced..... it always seems like GOD it would just be SO much better if you could just reach over and touch them or something. *sigh*
Last edited by starfishkitty; 06-20-2009 at 10:00 AM.
Today is his BDAY and I HATE that I can't be there with him. He decided to work today. lol I just hung up with him. We've been texting, e-mailing and talking on the phone since he showed up at 5-ish this AM.
Last edited by SunshineCA; 06-20-2009 at 02:41 PM.
I went to bed in not such a good way! He worked the night shift last night and didn't fair well either.
Can't wait to hear what happens. 
