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Old 08-21-2008, 02:05 PM   #16  
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Compared to what they can hear on network t.v. any given day I'm not sure that was too horrible a slip. I remember when I was a kid "bad" words were so much fun because such a big deal was made about saying them. If it's a one time thing, I'd let it slide and the kids will probably forget all about it.

But then, I live in a town where our mayor once told a class full of 9 year olds that if he could only take one thing with him to a deserted island, it would be a bottle of gin so what do I know
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Old 08-21-2008, 02:14 PM   #17  
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I agree with Mandalinn.

Also, I think there is a little bit of a difference in a High School or College setting. Not that I am condonning anyone cursing in any school. But especially in grade school. I know teachers slip up but they should always be aware of the little kids regardless of whether they hear cursing all the time or not. A teacher is supposed to set an example for the kids, just like a parent so I would let it slide this time but if it happened again I would be calling the teacher.
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Old 08-21-2008, 03:13 PM   #18  
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I just think it would be very unfair to go right to the principal. If you are so concerned and believe that the teacher is wrong, you should not have a problem openly discussing this with the teacher. If it occurs again after the initial conversation, then you could bring it up with the principal.
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Old 08-21-2008, 03:43 PM   #19  
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I just picked up my daughter--no "bad" words today
I'm sure she'll tell me if it happens again. Yesterday when I picked her up, it was the first thing she told me and she spelled it out- h-e-l-l , not saying the word herself.

Thanks everyone for your input.
You gals are great
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Old 08-21-2008, 07:50 PM   #20  
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I think you have an awesome daughter -- my son did the same thing in 1st grade -- came running off the bus, spelled a bad word another child had said and asked me what it meant. I think the most imporant point is that your child feels comfortable to discuss anything with you. There are so many issues that will come up over the next few years, having open communication is so important.

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Old 08-22-2008, 02:00 AM   #21  
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As a mother of 3 and as a former educator, I'd say let it sly! Not a biggie! Really!!
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Old 08-22-2008, 07:10 AM   #22  
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There are guns in schools, there are drugs, there is bullying and all sorts of awful stuff that could be going on, and you're upset because the teacher said h-e-l-l?

I think some perspective would be good here. Just my opinion.

Jay
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Old 08-22-2008, 09:35 AM   #23  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Here we go again View Post
I would talk to her politely. And if it doesn't improve take it to the principal. You have a right as a parent to not have to worry about your child hearing any kind of profanity in school.

I remember I was in high school and my teacher started cussing at us. Told us we weren't going to amount to anything and I stood up to him. I told him that if we can't cuss at him he can't cuss at us. He then preceded to say "B*itch I mean Beach get out in the hall. My last name is Beach, it wasn't a mistake. In the hall he said that he should send me to the principal's office. I said go a head. It was his first year teaching and I was a senior. I was an honor student and never been in trouble before. The principal believed me over him and I got signed statements from the class. He was put on teacher probabtion and was fine for the rest of the year. I love this quote, "Evil triumphs when good men do nothing."

We have a right to stand up for justice even if it's in a small way. She might have just said H*ll but what happens if next time she says something worse? It's just my opinion.
I don't think that the OP's situation, and the one that happened to you, are the same at all. Your former teacher cussed AT the class, and then AT you. This was a deliberate act, and was directed AT the students.

In the case of the teacher of the child of the OP, it wa an accidental slip, and it was not directed AT any of the children. It's isn't like she told a child to "shut the ____ up" or "get the ___ over here".

It is a different situation entirely. In the incident where you were in high school and the teacher was deliberately swearing AT you and the class...I agree that going to the principal was the right thing. In the case of the OP, I say give the teacher a break, and let it slide. She didn't do it on purpose.

The difference is one situation was an accident and towards herself, and the other deliberate and directed towards someone else.



I agree with Jay-with drugs, pedophiles, guns, bullying, and all of the other potential issues in schools, an accidental "****" is the last thing I would cause a ruckus over.

(I have three kids, BTW, and two of them in elementary school.)
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Old 08-22-2008, 10:05 AM   #24  
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I wouldn't make a big deal about it either. As usual, I agree with Kaplods -- there's a big difference between letting something like that slip one time in response to a mistake or dropping something or whatever, actually cursing AT someone.

Also, the word she did let slip, ****, is far from obscene. I know you don't want your daughter to say any of those kinds of words, but it really isn't an obscene word. And chances are, if you brought it up to her, she might not even remember saying it (esp. if you wait til your next meeting with her to bring it up), at which point you'd be accusing her of something.

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Old 08-22-2008, 10:14 AM   #25  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JayEll View Post
There are guns in schools, there are drugs, there is bullying and all sorts of awful stuff that could be going on, and you're upset because the teacher said h-e-l-l?

I think some perspective would be good here. Just my opinion.
Jay
AMEN. I am reading the thread with my jaw hanging to the ground.

You'd really go to the principal and file a complaint against a teacher for mumbling "oh ****" under her breath when she made a mistake???????

Wowza.

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Old 08-22-2008, 10:44 AM   #26  
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I guess I just hold teachers to a higher standard.

I know there are alot worse things going on in school, but kids look up to their teachers and if a teacher thinks it's ok, then the kids might think it's ok. Luckily my child knows the difference.

No, I'm not going to say anything, that's why I was asking for your opinions.

Oh, and I clarified the story with my daughter. The teacher had misspelled a word on the board, erased it, and was rewriting it and said "Oh, what the ****". Maybe she couldn't spell it correctly???? Maybe I should be more concerned about that??? The demographics of our school is very different and I think alot of parents would be concerned about her saying that in front of the class.

Anyway, thanks again all
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Old 08-22-2008, 11:03 AM   #27  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aphil View Post
I don't think that the OP's situation, and the one that happened to you, are the same at all. Your former teacher cussed AT the class, and then AT you. This was a deliberate act, and was directed AT the students.

In the case of the teacher of the child of the OP, it wa an accidental slip, and it was not directed AT any of the children. It's isn't like she told a child to "shut the ____ up" or "get the ___ over here".

It is a different situation entirely. In the incident where you were in high school and the teacher was deliberately swearing AT you and the class...I agree that going to the principal was the right thing. In the case of the OP, I say give the teacher a break, and let it slide. She didn't do it on purpose.

The difference is one situation was an accident and towards herself, and the other deliberate and directed towards someone else.



I agree with Jay-with drugs, pedophiles, guns, bullying, and all of the other potential issues in schools, an accidental "****" is the last thing I would cause a ruckus over.

(I have three kids, BTW, and two of them in elementary school.)
I agree that it's a different situation, but I also still believe that it starts somewhere. If a parent is concerned about what a teacher says, they have EVERY right to discuss it with the teacher. I'm not saying accuse her and make her feel awful, just bring it to her attention. Maybe next time she'll work extra hard not to let anything slip. It doesn't matter that kids could hear h-ell anywhere.

The bottom line is that it's not appropriate in a classroom. I'm not judging the teacher, we all mistakes I've slipped up and said something I shouldn't have, but I have never done it around children. We all know that children are very impressionable and if we can do one thing to protect their ears let's do it.

I don't mind being the odd ball here. I think there's a big difference between being a concerned parent and bringing it up to the teacher versus accusing the teacher. It could all be a big misunderstanding, but if the parent doesn't mention it to the teacher that it will just remain that, a misunderstanding. I just think that communication is key in this situation and if a parent has concerns to inquire.
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Old 08-22-2008, 11:13 AM   #28  
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I'm glad to see you chose to let it slide this time. We do all make mistakes. And, of course, if it continues to happen, then it should be addressed. Your daughter sounds like a sweetheart.
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Old 08-22-2008, 11:37 AM   #29  
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I agree that bringing it up would not be a bad idea IF (and it's a big IF) if you can do it in a very diplomatic, completely non-judgemental (at ALL), maybe even a little bit of a joking way. (Oh, you must have been SOOOO embarrassed).

Picking battles is very important, and I look at what goes on in any school (private or public) with teachers being sometimes blatantly unfair, demeaning students, being harshly critical, .... that if you're going to call a teacher on a mild swear word slip, you might want to ask your daughter which teachers are mean, which are unfair, which assign a lot of silent reading in class (so they don't have to teach), which aren't paying attention to kids cheating on tests, which teachers allow or ignore kids bullying other kids, which teachers get angry and inpatient easily, which teachers leave the classroom alot during class....

Because if you're calling a teacher on a mild swear, and not calling a teacher on other, more severe abuses of power what message are you really sending your daughter?

Last edited by kaplods; 08-22-2008 at 11:41 AM.
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Old 08-22-2008, 11:38 AM   #30  
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When my doctor told me that she treats more teachers
for anxiety disorders (I'm one of them) I wasn't surprised.
You've got 25 bosses (times two if the kids are from intact
families), the principal, the school district and NCLB on your
back. Give the teacher a break, or she WILL break.
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