Granted, but he is personally training you on washing out public toilets.

I wish I was at the Tiger's opening game today.

Granted, but you are sitting in the stands naked.

I wish I could run super fast.

Granted, but you needed bionic legs to do so and during your first run there was a huge downpour and they rusted up so you can't use them anymore.

I wish the housework could do itself.

Granted but the housework decided to evict you for not doing a good enough job.

I wish it was warmer today.

Granted. You find yourself in the middle of the Sahara with nary an oasis in sight.

I wish I didn't have to go to school (to work) today.

Granted, you no longer have to work Mondays, but you have to work every Saturday and Sunday.

I wish my daughter wasn't looking at colleges 1000 miles from home.

Granted, she has decided to live at home for the rest of her life rent free and job free.

I wish I had a new bike.

Granted, it's a top of the line 10" bike for a 3 year old with training wheels included. (You probably won't need the training wheels ;-)

I wish my laundry was done, folded and put away.

Granted your laundry is all done and put away,, To bad you left the red lipstick in your pocket now it's all over everything.

I wish I had a new puppy!!

Granted: But, your puppy is really a 120lb Great Dane that will pee lakes in your house everyday for the next 10 years.

I wish my husband was home from the war.

Wow how can I corrupt that wish. I can't.

Aww, I can't corrupt that one...He surprises you tomorrow morning by kissing you awake! (Maybe you have dragon breath, there, I corrupted it) Thank you for a brave husband!

I wish I knew how to play golf with my son.

You do but hit a golf ball through a 100,000 dollar stained glass window. Wish granted but it may take some time to pay that off. :)

I wish I could lose 100 pounds overnight.

Wish granted but now none of your clothes fit and you have to go shopping wrapped in a sheet!

I wish I had a real espresso machine in the house.

Granted, you get your'e espresso machine only to find out the price of coffee has skyrocketed and is more valauble than copper.


I wish my hubby would let me have a dog.

Wish granted, but that dog won`t stop barking!

I wish I had a brand new car.

Wish Granted, but your brand new car is pictured below

http://www.oddee.com/_media/imgs/art...6780_Regal.jpg

I wish I owned a pet.

Granted but it could be lethal.

http://www.themagazine.ca/cms/wp-con...orScorpion.jpg

(Emperor Scorpion) - can u believe ppl have these as pets OMG!

It's a nice day outside, I wish I wasn't stuck inside doing paperwork Grrrr....!

Wish granted, but you got a nasty sunburn and can't sleep tonight.

I wish my daughter would move back to the US from Australia.

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/780.gif







http://www.smileycentral.com/sig.jsp...p=ZNxdm824CLUS

Granted, but she moves to Anchorage.

I wish I could have a week off.

Granted, but you get life off as you're fired.

I wish I could have an orgasm.

Granted, you develop Persistent Genital Arousal Syndrome and now orgasm at the slightest vibration.

I wish I had more money!

Granted, but you cannot buy anything new or go on any expensive vacations because your friends and relatives would hover around you constantly asking for help. (At least you could pay off all of your bills and no one would know!)


.

Rose Centered- you forgot to make a wish!

I wish my room would stay organized.

Rose Elizabeth :) - Granted, but living in severe organization stiffles your creativity, and you spend all of your spare time trying to keep things in order rather than going out and having fun.

Now my wish...My daughter and her boyfriend would finally become engaged and set a wedding date. :flow1:

I feel bad about corrupting this one. It's so sweet! Granted, but the wedding is in Japan and you can't find an airline or a cruise line company to get you there in time!

I wish I had a concert grand piano all to myself.

Granted, it falls on you looney-tunes style.

I wish all my packing and moving was done!

Granted, but the moving company took your stuff to the wrong place!

I wish I was really good at chess.

But then you develop arthritis, making it difficult to play.

(no pain, no gain :P)

If I had a hammer...

Granted, but it's made of porcelain.

I wish my new shoes were already broken in.

Granted, but you can never take em' off ;-)
I wish I had a ginger cat, like Garfield

Granted, but it's a taxidermied cat. (too dark?)

I wish I never have to wash dishes again.

Granted, but the new dishwasher is some creepy guy who moves into your house, sleeps on your couch, and smells like cheese....

I wish to win the lottery!

Granted, but you lose the ticket before you can claim the prize

I wish my Christmas shopping was done

Granted! But the gifts are all wrong! Wrong size, color, style, game, etc.

I wish I could say what I wanted & not loose my job!

Granted. Now you are the boss, and because of what you say, all your employees quit.

I wish I had a closet for my clothes.

Granted! But it has a monster in it & it likes to grab you & tickle you so badly that you can't breathe!

I wish I could meet & have dinner at a table surrounded by my favorite actors & actresses!

Granted! But they all talk nonstop about themselves and end up in a fight about who is the most talented.

I wish it were spring.

Granted! But now your hayfever is soooo bad, you can't enjoy a moment of it!

I wish I owned a home, free & clear, over-looking the ocean.

Granted, but the ocean is too cold to swim in so you have to mortgage the house to build a swimming pool.

I wish I could move to Greece.