Ups & Downs Support Group: June 2014
 

:welcome3: to the Ups & Downs Support Group! Here is our June 2014 thread! Everyone is welcome to join the group, as long as you are willing to give and receive support in your weight loss journey. We named the group Ups & Downs to reflect the many ups and downs in our weight loss journeys, in our life with depression and (for some) on meds, and in life in general. If you are a regular, please post to let us know you found the new thread. If you are new to the group, please tell us a little (or a lot) about yourself. This is OUR forum, so post away!!! :D Group hug! :grouphug:

:D Happy June, everyone! We finally have beautiful weather here. Winter was l-o-n-g and spring has been wet and cold but yesterday and today have brought warm weather and cloudless blue skies. It has improved my mood so much; I feel spectacular!

Today will be a busy day for me. After more than a year without contact from any old friends, two college friends are stopping by the house for lunch and to catch up this afternoon. I informed them I'm on a special diet program, so there won't be any carbs or sweets but I've got some beautiful vegetables and will be making a lovely tossed salad. I'll mix up some tuna salad with low-fat mayo and have cheeses and a variety of raw nuts for protein. The friend who has hens is even going to bring some fresh, home-grown hard boiled eggs. :) They are not going to recognize me. :D The friends, not the hens. Just thought I'd make that clear.

Weights and measures this morning and I hit my 2-pound weight loss goal for the week. I'm 19 pounds away from Onederland and am thinking about changing up my schedule so to hit the gym M/W/F and take T/TH for rest days. My final decision on that depends on what the doctor says on Thursday. If she decides it is time for me to transition back to a standard diet, then I definitely will need to make the adjustment.

Have an absolutely beautiful Sunday, everyone.

Yay, it's JUNE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:carrot:

So to update everyone at once, I went to the store yesterday and fit into a pair of size 18 shorts! To add to it, they are a little baggy! I bought them anyway because I'll be in desperate need of them when it gets sweltering around here. I could fit into the 16's, but they were snug and would be pretty uncomfy to wear. I'm close though!!!

Sorry I've been MIA awhile, this week has been pretty busy. My government class is kicking my butt. It's both a boring and difficult class. :/ But I'm doing my best and I'm determined to get an A. I won't let this stupid class mess with my 4.0! If I got through math with an A I can get through this too!

Vermont- Awesome job on being so close to your goal!!!! Woot!

Ibelieveinme2- Your so very close to being in the 100's. I will include you in my prayers. God will see you through as he has so far on your journey! I worked with a trainer once for a free session at my gym. I didn't really like it. I'm a shy quiet person and honestly I don't feel like they understand me as a person and my workout routines. They push me in things that I know are terrible for my knees and leave me hardly able to walk the next day. I am really excited about our trip and yes it is to Nashville, IN. Really nice place I'm told. Another short week!!

lostbutstilltrying-I'm so very sorry for the rude remarks. It is a sad fact of our society. I wish more people knew the difficulty of losing weight. They think it is so easy to do but it is the hardest thing to accomplish.

worththeeffort- I love that quote! I'm going to write it down in my weight lifting journal that I take to the gym with me and look at it when I feel like I'm struggling. Awesome you'll be able to show off your hard work to your friends! I love seeing someone I haven't in a long time and getting the praise and encouragement that follows!

seabiscuit- Not sure if I've mentioned this or not, but I met my husband on an online dating site. It was a free one and I had to get through a lot of frogs, but when I found him, I can honestly say I knew I would marry him. That was almost 4 years ago. We began seeing each other around this time and officially called ourselves a coupe on June 8th I think. We will be celebrating 4 years together as a couple this weekend and two years together in marriage. I used to be embarrassed to say I met him online when we were dating, but now I couldn't be more proud!

I have been doing so well with my eating. I've stopped tracking calories and am really just trying to eat sensibly and watch my portion sizes. I've also learned not to go back for seconds and be satisfied with what I had. I treat myself so I don't go overboard too. I think it is working well. Right now my goal is to get into smaller clothes, I'm only using the scale to make sure I'm not going backwards. As I'm weight lifting, I know my body composition is going to be different than it was pre pregnancy. Thank you to whomever it was that mentioned it hasn't been very long since my pregnancy. This journey takes time and I've come to understand that! My husband is so very sweet and tells me constantly how beautiful I am, definitely a motivator and pick me up when I'm looking in the mirror and feel fat and ugly. It doesn't help I have terrible stretch marks, but he looks behind all of that and I know he loves me for me. He's also so very supportive in my eating and exercise. I love him so very much and can't wait to celebrate 4 years together and 2 years married this weekend. :dizzy::carrot::D

Well, I'm off to make a few more posts and then probably do some homework... ugh:devil: and some other things around the house. I hope everyone is having a wonderful first day of June and a great Sunday!

Hi there.

I just thought I'd pop over and check in. I'm feeling a bit fatigued from the head cold but it seems to be lessening in severity, I think the new antibiotic is helping.

Fleurdelis- thanks for your post. I think that this one guy seems very nice, I have my doubts about a few others.

I have to do more packing and I feel so drained from this cold...

Take care!

Amy

Hi ladies,


I have been working on math, getting ready for a math test on Wednesday. Just a a lot on my plate right now. I flunked my Unit 2 math review last Wednesday so I studied really hard for it and just now passed it today. (Sunday) Now I have to pass the Unit 2 test on Wed. I have 3 chances to pass but still I want to pass it with 1 or maybe 2.

I am getting over a really bad cold. I was so full of crap. I was taking DM pills to break it up so I could breath and I was taking cold pills so I would stop sneezing. I was miserable and I also missed some work.

My weight has gone up a bit but I am still happy. Life just has so much to give me and I am so lucky. When I am ready, I will shed some weight.

I got my left ear pierced a while back. It looks pretty cool. It's called an industrial piercing. I have it in both ears now. I love the look but I need another piercing to go with it. Google Industrial piercing and it'll show you what it looks like.


I hope you all are well and you are in my thoughts.

Wow, it sounds like everyone would be doing real well if it weren't for those nasty spring viruses. Hang in there, folks: the summer will dry those suckers into non-existence.

Ohio— Hey, I like the look of those industrial piercings! Anything with the word "industrial" in it sounds awesome to me anyway, because I used to be really into industrial rock music. Good luck in all your math efforts! =smile=

Amy— I'm glad you got the antibiotic, but don't forget that it will add to how drained you feel, for a while, until the virus is gone. Gook luck with your packing!

Fleur— Size 18 shorts—how fabulous! Especially because they're comfortably loose! I haven't worn a pair of shorts in so many years...but I'll get there, one day at a time. Here's wishing you great weather to wear your shorts in!

Worthy— 19 pounds away from Onederland—how exciting! No wonder you want to hit the gym more often... you go girl!

Kathleen— What's goin' on in your life? How's your eating been lately? Do tell...I'm ready to listen. =smile=

Here's just a little photo of the kittens: the solid-color adult you see is their mom, Cherry Bomb, and the striped adult is her mother, Penny. Apparently Grandma's been hanging out with the litter, who are now 6 weeks old. They've just been weaned onto solid food, and are doing well. I think that's my Oscar whom you see lolling around on the leopard-print blanket. 'Still don't know which female will be mine: the breeder will be picking one of the 3 females for her breeding program, but she won't know which one until they're about 8 wks old.

Hi there!

Ohio- good luck with math! I struggled with math for years, then I had my teacher and a fellow student tutor me which made all the difference. Keep at it!!!

Fi- thanks, I am on the new antibiotic for the second day, I feel better and less fatigued, so that's awesome! Your kitties are cute!

I would write more but I'm exhausted, gonna hit the hay!

Take care, good night!

Amy

Hello! thank you Kathleen for starting the June thread in such a timely fashion :D

I am SO impressed with you ladies who are in school..I am too lazy to do such a thing and I admire you having the courage to do so.

thanks for the cute kitten pic, Fi!

I hope Ohio is getting over her awful cold, and I hope you feel better too Amy, especially that you have to attack the moving/packing deal. Congrats on your kewl piercing, Ohio!

Fleur, congrats on fitting into a smaller size, and having them BAGGY to boot!!! baggy feels so good in the butt doesn't it :D

I worked hard on Saturday to prepare to have off yesterday, because it was forecast to be absolutely gorgeous, and it was. Spent all day on our motorcycles, over 200 miles, my husband has the 'raccoon' look with the sunburn, my face is still pale because i put so much suncreen/product, I don't want any more wrinkles than necessary.

I might not be as close to my goal as I was a few days ago, have been eating too much, gotta get back to the straight and narrow!

Hi to everyone else :hug:

I'm new to the group, so I'll explain a little bit why I'm here. I've dealt with depression since around age 13 (I'm turning 19 this summer) and it is especially bad in the summer. I do not enjoy the heat, picnics and parties make me anxious and most importantly, I don't normally do anything since I'm not in school. However, with this being my second summer out of school and my first summer having a job, I'm really thinking that this year will be different since I won't be bored and feeling lazy every day. :D

I'm an emotional eater for sure, in both ways. I eat a lot when I'm really happy, and when I'm feeling depressed. And my weight has gone up and down and up again from 220-205 so much over the last year and nine months (I started when I met my boyfriend) so this group feels like a perfect match for me.

Fiona- Adorable kitties! I've always wanted an orange one. I have 8 cats and aside from one brown one they're all mixtures of black, white and grey. I'll have to share a picture of my babies some day.

Fleur Congrats on a size 18! I'm trying to get out of that size myself and down into a 16 for the first time since starting high school. Good luck!

I'm feeling good today. Yesterday was a rough day of work as I was on the floor - I should mention I work at JCPenney - instead of the register and was the only one doing actual work to boot. So I was running all over trying to do everything. It was great exercise! Today though I only have a 5 hour day, so it'll be much lighter than my typical day. I'll have to make up for the shorter shift somehow.

Hi there.

I'm starting to panic because my landlord wanted to show my apartment today but I think he's going to show it Wednesday. I'm frantically trying to clean. Does anyone know how to clean marble countertops?! There's some water that splashed back and there's a rusty residue, ugh. I can't wait to move but dealing with this landlord in the mean time is a bit stressful.

Thanks for listening.

Amy

Hi all!

Had a busy weekend again. Finally got my lousy tenant evicted, but she was dragging her feet getting the last of her stuff out. Fortunately I've already rented it to a new tenant, but they are on a governement program that requires certain things done to the house, like screens on all windows, double vented h/w heater, etc. So I spent most of Saturday over there working on the punch list while the old tenant got her stuff out. Didn't get done until 8pm and I was SO sore and hot (the a/c was out). I kept having to stick my head in the freezer. Then the old tenant "accidently" locked herself out of the house after she had gotten out everything she wanted to keep, but all the junk was still there. So I had to go over Sunday afternoon and finish cleaning out all the trash. Thankfully Dad is supposed to fix the A/C today and the tenant will start moving in tomorrow and the hopefully the drama will cease!

I've been letting my house go to pieces lately, so I went in full out attack mode last night. Scrubbed the bathroom from top to bottom, washed all the curtains, rugs, & throw pillows, dusted, vacuumed, mopped and scrubbed the kitchen and living room. I didn't get to bed until midnight, but I know if I start the week with a messy house, it will stay messy the whole week. I still have the bedrooms and my workout room, but I'll get to those tonight. Hopefully once workout room is inviting again I'll use it! lol

So, that's what's been up with me. Exciting as all get out, istn't it? :D

I posted in the wrong thread.

My eating was very good over the weekend. Under 1000 calories both days. I'm really feeling motivated. Today I go to the grocery store. I go once a month. While I didn't get any junk food, the temptation is going to be there to binge on some of the healthier snacks I got. If I do that just means no snacks for the rest of the month as I won't be going back to the grocery store.

Welcome!
 

Melarie: :welcome: to the group! Glad you posted! Best wishes to you in your weight loss journey. I hope you will find the group to be supportive of your goals. :)

Hi Melarie, Welcome to the group. Sounds to me like you are going to fit right in here.

Hi lilturtle, man, it sounds like you are right on track and focused. That is fantastic.

MonteCristo, it also sounds like are focused. that is wonderful.

Amy, it sounds like you under some stress with your residence. I hope that in time, it will resolve itself. Now about my math, I may need a tutor too. This stuff isn't for the weary of heart.

Holly, it's so good to see you sweetie. I hope you are well. Hope you are riding your motorcycle as much as you want to. My cold is finally breaking up and I am back to work. This last cold was a wicked one, I'm still trying to get rid of the gross crap.

I have to take my Unit 2 Math Test on Wednesday. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers, ladies. I need all the special thoughts when it comes to math, that I can get. You wouldn't think percentages would be that hard but there are so many formulas to learn. *sweating* The Unit test is over 3 whole chapters and there is a ton of info to memorize.

Nice to meet you, Melarie! I think you'll find that if you post here often, daily if possible, it will really help you stay motivated. Amy, I'm sorry to hear your landlord is making your packing so stressful. Lisa, I'll have you in my prayers: good luck with that math! Kathleen, I miss hearing about what's going on in your life. Everyone else: I'm thinking about you!

Well, I had a nice day off from everything. I had to stop myself several times from doing things for the BERP (Big Entropy Reduction Project), that's how much it's become my life. I wrote one postcard, but other than that I didn't do anything for anyone else. I mostly worked on decorating the front and back covers of my art journal. I want to be ready to show it to my great-niece Grace on Saturday, when she's supposed to have her own art journal decorated, too. I have a few more things to add to it, but the bulk of the work is done. My collage studio is filling up with piles of books that I've moved up from downstairs, so I gotta get those squared away before Saturday, too.

I did have a significant mood slump in the afternoon: depression pain, pretty bad. Maybe my brain is feeling all the stress from the BERP, and it needed to take a dive for a few hours. But tonight I'm good, and I got my leg exercises done without too much strain. I've been slacking off on those for a while, so I needed to get back with the program. I plan to make an early night of it, and attack the BERP with a vengeance in the morning.

good morning ladies!

Fi, I'm glad you gave yourself a day off from your big project. But sorry to hear of the afternoon slump. Great to tackle your leg exercises, that can only help us :)

Lisa (Ohio)- I am sending you math power thoughts :D hoping you ace it! I'm not a lover of numbers, I am a word lover, haha. Again I am so impressed by adults who work to improve by further education, as that's something I've not done, cause I'm a scaredy-cat :devil: so I am in awe of you :love: I hope you're getting all the crud out of you from your wicked cold! Oh and yes I am riding alot :moped: and loving it.

Amy (seabiscuit) - Oh I wish I had advice on how to clean marble countertops, I have nothing so nice here, LOL. But I'm sorry you're feeling stress from knowing the landlord wants to show your place.

Lilturtle - wow congrats on being so on-program! and buying wisely at the grocery store. I forget if I congratulated you on losing 100 pounds in a year...CONGRATULATIONS!! :D :cheer2:

Monte Cristo - I'm glad the lousy tenant is finally gone! it must have been so hot working without the a/c. And jeez, you sound like a cleaning dervish :devil: I hope your house stays clean :D

Worthy - congrats on your 2 lb week loss AND being so close to Onederland!! I hope you had a nice visit with your college friends. Isn't some nice weather EXACTLY what we need :D I'm so glad you are feeling as spectacular as the weather!!

Melarie, - Hi and :welcome: to our group! I'm so sorry that you've suffered from depression at such an early age. Congrats on already being down 25 pounds!! And I hope your job doesn't tire you out too much, but i have found that a job that MAKES you stay on your feet does strengthen you, even though it makes us feel tired.

Hi to Kathleen, Sabrina, Chelsea, Lost, and I haven't forgotten about projectjudi, 1life, alita, and my friend from YEARS here Ms. Hope

I have to take my car to a collision/body repair shop, a man rolled right though his stop sign and collided with my car, the jerk :devil: I yelled at him, 'I am usually on my motorcycle, this could have been so much worse!" It happened like a mile from my work. Very minor damage, but I want my car exactly as it was BEFORE his error.

I also am LOVING our late spring weather (our lilacs just bloomed; my irises have not bloomed yet) I am just so much happier about everything. I am such a different person now, than in winter.

Been trying very very hard to stay on the straight and narrow diet path, it is difficult wtih my summer job..yesterday I made a batch of coffee ice cream, a batch of lime sherbet, and only allowed myself a tiny taste of each to correct flavor.

Emotionally drained!
 

Today, I am emotionally drained. I had a run-in with my mom over the weekend and again yesterday. It was about our trip to Ireland. Did I already mention that my family is traveling to Ireland with my parents for my niece's wedding there??? Well, the run-in was a typical attempt by my mother to manipulate and be passive-aggressive with me. This has gone on my entire life. And, at the age of 47, I have FINALLY had enough of her b.s.!!! I decided that I am going to be honest with her as much as possible now, because I do not want to have regrets and unspoken resentments toward my parents when they "move on." (My dad is 85 and my mom is 80.) Anyway, I won't bore you with the details, but I am very proud of myself that I didn't emotionally eat over this latest episode. (However, I was thinking, "No wonder I have issues and I'm overweight!") It is so difficult to break free of the "chains" that bind me from my childhood, mainly because the same dysfunctional patterns and behaviors still go on with my parents, especially my mom.

Walked a bit at the lake this weekend, but didn't get a lot of exercise in. We were busy celebrating my daughter's 15th birthday. She took a friend to the lake. The weather was PERFECT again this past weekend!!! :sunny: This morning, I am back on board. I worked out with my trainer and will be going to the gym twice tomorrow (once for strength training and another time for cardio while my daughter strength trains with our trainer). I went to the store yesterday and stocked up on healthy foods, so food has been really good the past few days. I stepped on the scale last week and have basically stayed at the same weight. I need to get that d@mn # on the scale to move DOWN!!! I am driving myself crazy about it! :dizzy: It seems that something always comes up and/or I get derailed from my weight loss efforts, but I am NEVER giving up!!! I just won't!!!

Worthy: I hope your visit with your college friends went well. Congrats on hitting your 2-pound weight loss for the week and being 19 pounds away from ONEderland!!! That is great and really exciting! :D

Sabrina: HOORAY for a baggy size 18!!! That is awesome! So is your 4.0!!! :carrot: Hope you get that A in your government class. Keep up the great work with your healthy and portion-controlled eating! Thank you for keeping me in your prayers. I am close to the 100s, but my weight has been stalled here for SO VERY LONG, so I feel a bit hopeless about it. I DO have faith that all things are possible with God, though, and believe me, I have been asking for His help. I keep reminding myself that it is about God's timing and NOT mine!

Amy: I hope your packing is coming along okay. Sorry you have been so drained from your head cold and allergies. My allergies have bothered me a lot lately, too. Hope your landlord gave you more time before showing your place. Not sure how to clean marble countertops. Sorry! You have a lot of stressors in your life right now. Be patient with and kind to yourself! :)

Lisa: Good luck with your math!!! I will keep you in my prayers on Wednesday! Let us know how your test goes. I certainly do not envy you. I would hate going back to school after ALL these years!

Trish: So happy to hear that your eating has been well and you are feeling very motivated! :D

MonteCristo: Sounds like you have been incredibly busy cleaning your house and fixing things for your new tenant! Hope you get some "down time" (as in relaxation) soon. :D

Fi: So sorry to hear that you had a mood slump and depression pain again yesterday. Glad you recovered by evening and got your leg exercises done. I hope that as you attack that BERP today, you are remembering to take your necessary breaks! What a relief it will be for you once the BERP is complete and your kittens have arrived! OMGosh, btw, those kittens are so darn cute! :love:

Holly: So sorry about the jerk who rolled through a stop sign and collided with your car. Glad you weren't on your motorcycle and that you are okay! Hope you can get everything repaired and back to its previous condition soon and without event! Happy to hear that you are much happier now that the nicer weather has finally arrived! Enjoy your bike riding and be careful!!! :D :bike:

Waving HELLO to everyone else!!! :wave:

Kathleen - OH I am so sorry to hear of the strife with your mom!! You did mention the trip to Ireland but I didn't know it was to be with family..hmmm..yes there is strong possibility of tension there! If you want, please do type out what you are feeling, you will not bore me at all..or type it out and delete it..or send it PM. If it would help you . HOwever how GREAT that you did not 'eat your emotions'!!!

I can only advise, about making the scale budge, that what is working for me, is eating so much less than I want :( sad face but I am getting 'kinda' used to it. What I thought was unbearable hunger pangs before, I know that I can get through now, without dying :D

a thought ...baring our childhood demons here, that have affected us our grown-up lives?? some have already mentioned child abuse :( :( :( I had nothing that awful, thank goodness..but I was scarred, I know, from growing up without a father. At my age now, fifty-stinking-three years old, :D I still YEARN for a dad to 'take care' of me, you know, take care of my car, I don't know, things a dad would do, protect me..I also want to be an independent woman, who can do things for herself/on her own...conflicts! .I was watching the movie "Grease" recently, and when a girl said to Sandy, 'the only man a girl can trust is her father' just made me tear up. Because our dad did visit us, but sometimes he would miss a visit.

Thanks everyone for all the support. I haven't slept hardly at all the last two nights. I feel bad physically and everytthing I eat is making me sick. I hope I sleep tonight.

Thanks for all the welcomes guys!

seabiscuit - when we had marble counter tops we used baking soda, a teaspoon of cream and tartar and just enough peroxide to make a paste. Use an old toothbrush to rub it on, let it sit for 30 minutes and then wipe it off with a wet cloth. I feel your landlord pain. When we moved out of our apartment we cleaned for 3 days straight and still didn't get our deposit back. Good luck.

fiona - glad you got through your slump! And an art journal soundss like an awesome idea. I've been wanting to get back into drawing and other arty things, maybe decorating a journal would be good project to get me moving on it.

IBelieveInMe2 - Sorry about the stuff with your mom. Hopefully the honesty thing will improve your relationship in time. And great job not giving in to the emotional eating! Not an easy thing to resist I know.

Holly- Thank God you weren't on your bike! Hopefully the nice weather you're having keeps up so you can ride. My mom and step dad ride, but the weather here hasn't been great and when it is, he's on the road. So you have your own bike? That's awesome. I'd be way too afraid to drive one. I can barely even drive a car without panicking.

Speaking of driving, I need to get out and drive again. My mom had me drive like half a mile the other day and I started crying when we pulled into our driveway, just from nerves lol. But I hadn't driven in a year, in my defense.

And if we're airing or childhood issues here, I guess I'll mention that I've been feeling down about my relationship with my dad lately. A new friend of mine at work was talking about fishing with her dad and it reminded me of how close we used to be. We would always go fishing and wash the cars together on the weekends and then when I got a bit older it stopped. When my parents divorced it totally ruined our relationship. Now that I'm an adult, he doesn't even invite me over anymore.. I haven't seen him in months and it bothers me a lot more than I expected or like to admit. I wanted nothing to do with him as a teenager, so why am I so bothered?

Because it is his DUTY to love and care about you!!! :mad: I am sorry to be so abrupt but holy heck. Hey, we are all awful as teenagers, we should not be held responsible for our teenage years :devil: but you are a young adult now. I am so very sorry that he is missing from your life. That is not right. I hope he realizes SOON that he needs to keep in contact with you, before you get jaded and write him out of your life completely.

Okay I am off my soapbox, lol. Yes I have my own bike, I was scared at first but wanted to conquer it more than the scaredness, so I had to force myself. Now I love it more than anything! I'm really lucky because we'r quite rural, and I can ride to work, so it's a 46 miles round trip of beautifullness. You're in Ohio? One of our favorite biker parties is in Chillicothe, and we have friends near Columbus.

I'm sorry driving gives you such anxiety :( Hopefully if you go for short drives in low-traffic areas, that will help ?

Lilturtle, so sorry to hear you don't feel well. I hope you can sleep tonight!

Fiona- Those kitties are so cute!!! Do you have any other cats besides the two you will be getting from the litter? Glad you were able to get out of the slump from earlier.

Ohio- Good luck on the math test. I finished a statistics class a while ago and man was it challenging.

Vermont- What an awesome day! Glad you got to get in a lot of miles. I remember riding with my dad on perfect days like that. The best part of summer! Glad your a stickler for the sunscreen, I am too when I'm going to be outside a while. I burn so badly if I don't. I'm glad to hear you weren't on your bike during that accident! Also, in regards to hunger pains, it helps me a lot to drink a lot of water when I think I'm hungry. Gives me that full feeling. I eat a lot less than when I was pregnant and actually feel content with it, guess it's because Isabelle isn't siphoning all my energy and calories!

lil turtle- I hope you feel better!

Ibelieveinme2- I rely so very much on God's will. He has a plan for all of us and his timing is truly his own. Sorry to hear about the issues you've been having with your mom. Definitely a good thing that you are making a chance so you don't regret anything later. And two a days at the gym??? GO YOU!!! It's neat you're working out with your daughter. It's always nice to have a buddy in the gym.

Melarie- Welcome to the group! Hopefully we will get into size 16's together! I always think of myself as being young, but when you say you've only been out of high school for two years, I realize I'm not as young as I feel. haha! I'm 24 btw, but it feels like yesterday that I just got out of high school. I'm sorry to hear about your relationship with your dad, maybe you could write him a letter to tell him how you feel?

Went to the gym today and had a really good weight lifting workout. Benched 50lbs which is my highest bench press to date. Pretty exciting for me! :) Did well with food today as well.

Got to work on some homework now!

seabiscuit- I hope your landlord lays off!

Monte- Sounds like me when I go on a cleaning binge!

Hi there!

I went to volunteer work at the hospital today but I didn't stay for my shift because I have been fighting a sinus infection. I gave out cards to my co-workers and I gave and received lots of hugs. I will miss them so much. I had a lot of laughs with them, and one of the CT scan techs brought in cookies and brownies for me. I was so touched! :D. I have found a lot of my co-workers on Facebook, so I sent a few messages.

My apologies for not writing personals tonight but I am very tired from the antibiotic and I am trying to get my apartment tidy for my landlord showing it tomorrow.

I'm considering doing a hospital based outpatient weight loss program. I'm going to check out one of the sessions, the first one is free!

Take care!

Amy

Helloooooo friends.


It has been a rather long day. We tried to get Jennifer's car tires balanced. I won't go into details but we were there 2 hours and nothing happened. I am pooped.


Jennifer and I came home and ate pizza, then we cleaned the living room and kitchen together.

I need to study tonight. I have my Unit 2 test tomorrow. I have hope I will pass. I have been studying my arse off and I have a tutoring session tomorrow.

I am still trying to get over my cold. I know it's TMI but blowing my nose is always interesting. Jennifer said to me today, "aren't you over that yet?" I just can't seem to get it to break up.

FleurDeLis, I evidently have to take a statistics class too. bleh

lilturtle, feel better soon, hon.

fiona, an art journal sounds like a great idea. yay!!!!

Kathleen, I am so sorry about not getting along with your mom. I used to not get along with mine, she used to be so manipulative. She's kind of quit. I like her a lot more now.

I'll write back more to the rest of you later. I'm really tired. Much love to you all.
Malerie, Holly, seabiscuit hugs to you all.

New to all this sharing, sorry if I come off like a whiner.
 

This is my first "support group" I've joined. I've had a problem with depression ever since I was in middle school, I'm 23 now. Last June I was 160 lbs and I got down to 122 by December from exercising and eating healthy. I was surrounded by friends in my home town in Iowa and wanted to surprise my husband who is in the military and was gone at the time. Since then, we have been relocated to San Diego, California where I have no friends or family, although I have tried, maybe not hard enough. Anyways, my husband left for 3 months to North Carolina and I've fallen into a slight depression, missing him and my mother and aunt who I am extremely close with. I've gained weight and am depressed every time I look in a mirror at my body. I'm currently 132 bs (I know, I should be happy, but this body image ordeal kind of messes you up and all I can picture is myself gaining weight back to 160). I try to exercise but it's just not the same alone and none of my work peers are into exercising so I barely work out. Have any of you experienced a similar situation and do you have any advice?

Oh man, folks, this BERP (Big Entropy Reduction Project) is the biggest sustained decluttering effort I've ever done in my life, by a long ways, so I'm really working hard. I had a very productive day today, and I'm exhausted. Because we need more boxes to move the rest of the unwanted books out of the house, I switched my efforts to the kitchen, where I've had three full boxes worth of papers stashed, plus some stuff that wasn't boxed. Most of it dates back to 2008 & 2009, but I was surprised to discover that back then I was still hanging onto stuff from '00! Whoa, and even a letter from my father in the second box: that was stressful for me to see.

Y'all will probably think I'm callous to say this, but I'm not sorry at all that my dad is dead: he really tortured me psychologically right up 'til the very end, by refusing to let me fly down to Texas and say goodbye to him before he went. And then at the very last minute he did a number on me by telling my mother that he wished I were there with him! After he insisted on my not coming down! Fortunately my sister knew he had ordered me not to come, so when my mother started laying a guilt trip on me about not saying goodbye to him, she helped me convince her that it wasn't my fault...sheesh. He had really interesting handwriting, so I'm saving what was probably my last letter from him for use in collage. I may never use it, but that's better than just consigning it to the recycle bin.

I did have another dip in my mood in the late afternoon, probably because I was processing all that stuff. It wasn't as bad as Monday's, though. All the same, I thought sundown would never come and bring me relief. I like the longer days, for sure, but my diurnal rhythm is such that if I have a mood slump like that, I crave night time, which pulls me out of it. Just lying in the darkness and listening to my favorite deejay's rock-n-roll show was really restorative...

And I did my leg exercises tonight—my left leg, which is always tougher than the right. They weren't bad at all: even though I don't have time to walk these days, I'm moving around a lot and going up & down the stairs more frequently and lugging around heavy boxes & heavy bags of stuff out for recycling, so I'm a lot more active than I was before the BERP started.

I need to go to bed, so I don't have time for extended personal comments, but I want to say to Kathleen that I'm so glad you're talking to us about the family issues coming up before your trip to Ireland for your niece's wedding. It sounds like a bunch of us had dysfunctional experiences growing up—not surprising, given that we have problems with mood and with our weight. Good for you for standing up to her this time, and for not giving in to emotional eating! SL36, welcome to the thread! We all try hard to be supportive of each other here, so I think you'll find this a great place to hang out. Holly, so sorry to hear about that stupid jerk messing up your car. I definitely understand what you're saying about wishing you had a dad, but as you can hear from my own experience and other people's, fathers are a mixed bag just like mothers are. Fleur, I want to answer your question about these kittens we're getting in late July or thereabouts: so far we've had two consecutive pairs of oriental shorthairs, both times male & female littermates, but they're gone now. These new kittens will be our third pair. We're childfree by choice, so cats are what we do instead of having human kids. That's why I'm pushing so hard on the BERP, to get the house in decent shape before our new fur-kids arrive! Orientals are very social & affectionate, and also very active, so I want them to have a wonderful home with lots of room to run and play.

Good night, y'all!

good morning

! SL36, :welcome: and nice to meet you. First, getting from 160 to 122 is amazing!! I'm sorry you are not happy with your current weight, many of us would love where you are :D but I completely understand about YOU not being happy where you are weight-wise. Must be very lonely being transplanted in a new place and once you're an adult, it IS hard to make friends. I guess I would try to concentrate more on diet, to lose, if you are having a hard time finding the time to work out. Are you interested in home dvd's or youtube for workouts? that's what I do.

Fi, you are so committed to your project! And thanks for sharing your view of dads..you're right, I should be careful what I was wishing for :D just having a father isn't the same as having a good father.

HI to everyone else. As it's early summer, I am in my element!! enjoying watching my deck flowers thrive, transplanting seedlings, adoring my motorcycle :D and liking going to work. I wish SO much I could feel like this all year, not just from May to September.

I finally slept last night! I feel a bit better. Will write more later.

Hi there,

I just want to pop in and say hi. I'm doing ok, I am frustrated with trying to renew my Medicaid and food stamp benefits. I had my last session with my therapist today, I will miss him.

I'm still fighting this cold but it's getting better.

Take care everyone...

Amy

:o I forgot to subscribe to the thread so have fallen behind. I've got to go back and read everyone's posts. I hit the gym Monday and today but it is definitely more crowded than on Tues/Thurs. :( I did manage to find a free crossramp machine and proceeded to do a 90-minute workout, including a 30-minute speed interval routine. I'm wiped out. :yawn:

Welcome!
 

SL36: :welcome: to the group! Happy to have you here! :) I'm sorry that you have struggled with depression for such a long time. Many of us have. Congratulations on buckling down and losing almost 40 pounds last year!!! :D I would KILL for even the 160 weight right now, but I understand your concern that you will regain all of the weight you lost. It is scary and frustrating! I lost over 35 pounds about 4 years ago and did gain that and more back. The POSITIVE thing you have going for you is that you KNOW what works for you: exercise and eating healthy. It worked before, so it will most likely work again ~ to help you to lose the 10 extra pounds you've put on and STOP the weight gain. Do what you can to stop the gain NOW, so that you won't have to lose all of it again. I know that is easier said than done, but we will cheer you on all the way!!! :cheer2: Since you had the courage to post here, you are no longer alone on this journey! :hug: We all stand together with you and have weight loss as our goal, too! WE can ALL do this..... TOGETHER!!! :grouphug:

I'm afraid I had a rough day. I had to deal with a full box with lots of images needing clipping. All the decisions I'm making are wearing me out: at one point I calculated that I was making some 200-400 decisions an hour. What to keep, what to toss. What to clip, how to clip it. Over and over and over again.

I had a pretty bad slump into depression pain that lasted far into the evening. It was especially frustrating because our niece Margaret and her 7-yr-old son Gavin came over, and sort of spontaneously they ended up staying for dinner. Eventually I couldn't take the socializing anymore, and had to excuse myself to take some extra Geodon and curl up in a ball on the couch. Embarrassing...

I can't believe I have to face the BERP again in the morning. I'm starting to hit the wall...

Fleur: Yay! Congratulations on a baggy size 18 on your way to 16. How I look forward to the day I can say the same! Keep up the good work on your classes. You won't regret that, either!

Amy: Hope the cold is much better. I'm not sure about rust stains on marble. Try Googling it?

Ohio: Keep up the hard work on your math courses. I hope your cold is much better by now. How did the math test go?

Fiona: The kittens are adorable. I bet you are so excited to add them to your family. Keep BERPing!

Holly: Good on you for using sunscreen. Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize! I hate that I'm reaching the stage that wrinkles are becoming visible. Of course, the weight loss only accelerated that process. I admire you for being able to do your summer job and not spend a lot of calories "testing" your final products. ;)

Melarie: Welcome to the group! You're lucky to have a job where you can move around a lot. On those days with shorter shifts, you'll have time to get even more exercise in.

MonteCristo: Sorry about the crappy tenant but at least she's out. Definitely keeping the exercise room neat and inviting is the way to go! :)

Lilturtle: Your trip to the grocery is long-since over but you can always try the trick of eating a meal before going shopping so you're not hungry and will stick to your grocery list.

IBelieveInMe: I'm very sorry to read that you had a trying run-in with your parents. Parents do have a way of pushing buttons. I'm proud of you, too, for recognizing your triggers and staying in control of the emotional eating. Congratulations for getting back on track at the gym and grocery store. Never give up!

SL36: Welcome to the group. It must be very difficult to relocate away from friends and family. I'm not sure if you're in military housing or if spouses have access to a fitness facility. If you're a sociable person, you might make new friends by hanging out in places where other military wives hang out. I, personally, live and work in a place I've been for years but all my close friends have married and moved on to other areas of the country and other ways of life so I have been doing my weight loss program without support. It can be very difficult and lonely. The best thing you can do is get yourself a good pair of sturdy sneakers and head out the door! Get walking and explore your new city. And don't forget that sunscreen! :D

The male cardinal is sitting outside in the yard singing away like crazy. Some of you are probably surrounded by cardinals all the time and think they make a racket but where I live, they are a rare bird so we're very excited to have a nesting pair who call your property home.

I head back to the doctor this morning. I think the decision will be made today about whether or not I should transition. I go back and forth. One minute, I think it would be best to transition to a non-ketosis diet now, while the weather is good and I'm doing so well with my fitness. The next minute, I'm afraid that if I transition, my weight loss progress will slow to zero. Oh, I wish I didn't over-think things! What must it be like for people who just make a decision, boom, just like that, without agonizing over it? :?:

just wanted to post that I am still alive, and while I haven't been doing great on the eating front, things are getting better and I will probably pop in this weekend and catch up with everybody - have a good rest of the week all!

Hello everyone.


I passed my TEST!!!!!!!!


Now I am onto Algebra. booooooo LOL Does anyone on here know Algebra???:?: I think I'm going to need help. Actually I have a tutor once a week. I'd go more often but my class is only once a week.

SL36Welcome to the group. I feel so badly for you. It is awful when you don't feel like you have a support system. I don't have a lot of friends either. I have once good friend and I have my family. Just try to get out and make new friends. I usually make new friends at work. Just lean on us here for support. We are always here to listen.

Fi, good luck with your kittens. I totally understand what it is like to have pets that add so much to your life, that they are family.


Worththeeffort2, holymoly, girl you go. You are doing so good!!!! I wish I could work out like that.


I have bad news. My cell phone has been acting up and it might be going bad. If it does, I am sunk. I guess at some point i got pop inside it, it was all sticky when I took the back off it. I wiped it with a damp cloth but it may be ruined. I'll let you know if it continues to act up on me.



Much love to all you girls.

Fiona - I am sorry you are struggling. Go easy on yourself a bit. The slump will pass and you'll be back to BERPing again.

I do my grocery shopping online. It gives me time to think about what I am ordering, check calories and compare things easier. Plus no impulse buying. It also saves time at the store. I just go and they come out and load it into the car.

I am OLD!!!
 

Well, today was my 8th graders LAST day of grade school. She is now officially a FRESHMAN in HIGH SCHOOL!!! The graduation is tonight, but they held a really nice candle ceremony along with a school mass this morning that was a real tear-jerker! :cry: The graduatiing 8th graders light their candles and then pass their light on to the upcoming 8th graders. Then the 8th graders all sing together, "Take Your Candle; Go Light Your World." It is really beautiful and so touching. I can't believe that BOTH of my kids are now in HIGH SCHOOL. I am feeling quite OLD today. But I am very happy for both of my children and feel blessed that they have both come SO FAR! My now SENIOR in high school was 2 lbs, 3 oz at birth and my now FRESHMAN was 3 lbs, 5 oz and has Spina Bifida. (Yes, I had trouble carrying my pregnancies to term! All of my children were born very prematurely and my son's twin died 14 hours after birth, for any of you who didn't know.) My kids mean THE WORLD to me, so today is a very emotional day for me. I will be somewhat relieved after the 8th grade graduation tonight. On to high school. Unbelievable!!! My "babies" are growing up so fast!!!

Lisa (ohiofreespirit): CONGRATULATIONS on PASSING your test!!!!!!!! :D That is wonderful news! :carrot: I am very happy for you! :)

Fi: So sorry you had a rough day yesterday!!! :( You have worked so hard on the BERP. Maybe you need to take more than one day off right now. Your body seems to be telling you so. Listen to it's signals. I just don't want you to overdo it and then set yourself back in the depression department. I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. I know how difficult clearing clutter can be (believe me!!!). You can do it! Maybe you just need a little BREAK! And that is OKAY!!! Take good care of yourself first! The clutter will wait!

lostbutstilltrying: Thanks for checking in. Glad to hear that things are beginning to get better for you.

Worthy: Best of luck deciding if you should transition in your weight loss program yet or not. Tough decision! Hope your doctor will provide you with good guidance.

Trish: Online shopping for groceries is a great idea! How convenient to make the decisions at home ~ without temptations ~ and just go and pick everything up.

Waving HELLO to everyone else!!! :wave:

:congrat: Congratulations, OhioFreeSpirit! Excellent job. :hug: Hope you take time to feel really proud of yourself and give yourself a pat on the back.

Khan Academy, free online, is a fantastic resource. 60 Minutes did a segment about the quality of the lessons posted on the site. You have to register to use the site but the courses are structured to walk folks right through them using video and audio.

Congrats Ohio! Algebra is my specialty, so feel free to ask any time you need some help! Seriously, I won't mind - it's fun for me since I don't get to use that kind of math much these days :)

worththeeffort2 Thank you, and yes I am lucky. I feel so much healthier getting all that exercise and it's really helped my depression so far too! Unfortunately though, I can't work out on my short-shift-days because they're evening shifts, and I worry that exercising in the morning will have me tired halfway through the night. Maybe once I get more used to the activity though! Right now though, I don't think I can handle more exercise than work. I still have my newbie feet and back. :P

I'd write more but I'm beat and I have to be up early in the morning. Just wanted to check in and update. I'm feeling great today! I went shopping earlier and while I didn't find what I was looking for, I found a great dress for $8. It's from Nicki Minaj's line and the way it's cut is perfect for my big butt :D On top of that, I get to work with this awesome guy-friend of mine tomorrow for most of my shift!

No sleep again last night. It is stress related and I don't know how to manage it. I haven't seen a psych since March. I'm on a waiting list for a therapist who once I see them will refer me to the doctor so it will be God knows how long until I see one.