When I finished my morning coffee and realized I was not in depression pain—oh joy!—I immediately decided I should work on the BERP. Bad idea. I worked for an hour and then suddenly hit the wall: I froze up like a catatonic. I was apparently moaning, because Bob came down and rescued me, taking the scissors out of my hand and telling me it was obvious I needed to take the day off.

"But I'm not depressed," I said. "I should work on the BERP."

"You need a break during which you're not depressed," he replied. "It's June! We're not up against the deadline yet."

And so I relaxed, and felt good again, and just sprawled on the couch for over an hour—so happy to be not depressed, and not working on the BERP.

It's a beautiful sunny day. I hope y'all are having a good Sunday!

Hi everyone,

Sabrina, you will get better. I feel it in my bones. Just be patient, take care of yourself, go work out, let things work themselves out. You will be ok. Let yourself shine, just be your beautiful self. Your weight will work itself out. I'm sorry about your headache. :(

Amy, I am so happy about you and your date. yay!!!!!!

Worththeeffort2, I hope with all my heart that you get that open position. That would be fantastic. It would be so good for you!!!! I will say a prayer.

Fi, how are the kittens? I am glad your last post seems more positive and that you are feeling better.

I am going to spend today watching my Nascar race and studying math. I am going to take my Final on Wednesday. Please keep me in your thoughts. :)


Much love to all and positive thought for everyone.

Ohio- You like NASCAR??? So do I!!!

Who is your favorite driver?

Hello all! Hugs to those not doing so great. :(

I haven't been around the last few days because I've been working my *** off and finally got a much needed break with some family last night when my shift ended. Saw a Pink Floyd tribute band with my dad, his girlfriend, her friend, and my brother. It was really awesome, even though I was freezing and only semi-conscious for half of it. Then this morning we went to breakfast with my grandpa and my great aunt and uncle and played cards afterwards! It felt good to do something other than work and talk to the boyfriend. Tomorrow I'm back at work for 4 nights in a row. Father's Day rush is over though, thank goodness!

I'm going to learn how to golf soon, sort of.. My friend from work is going to take me to a driving range and he's gonna teach me how to hit a ball. We've never hung out outside of work, so it should be fun and hopefully will open the doors to us being more than just work-friends. He, and the job in general, have been so great for my depression. I'm so thankful that I met someone my own age there who I'm so comfortable with. I've desperately needed a good friend in my life for so long.

hello! sorry I haven't been around. I worked a couple of evening dining room shifts at work, and would spend the night there instead of going home late then driving right back to work early. My Kindlefire is not letting me get a connection while there, so I've been out of touch.

Fi, real sorry you've had some episodes of pain and hit the wall. Hope you're back on track with the BERP.

Lisa, so nice to hear you being so positive for everyone else! :) glad you had a good math night!

Amy, congrats on the move being over..and cool about the date!

Melarie, it sounds like the co-worker friendship could be a great thing for you, outside of work!

Sabrina, positive thoughts from me to you for the coveted position!!

Worth, also positive thoughts from me to you, for the transfer/promotion!

and Hi to everyone else :)

I haven't worked out in over a week :( I just can't seem to get my butt in gear in the morning. Even worse, this past week I think I've been eating everything I've wanted! I was doing so well for over a month and it was showing. Have got to get my head back in the game!

Positives are, the days of recent rain have made my flowers so pretty, along with the liberal use of Miracle-Gro. I cut the grass yesterday so the lawn looks beautifu. lAlso this week is payweek, I get paid every 2 weeks so it's like a celebration every other Thursday :D

today is my one day off...i WILL workout after I type this, then do laundry, then need to do some Presidential-duty-type stuff, then I really want to get out on my motorcycle but the road construction really puts a damper on it.

I had my tooth pulled Friday and ended up sleeping most of the afternoon. My diet was good over the weekend as I was limited in what I could eat. I'm hanging in there. Thinking of everyone here. We can do this!

Getting back into the BERP today, sort of doing stuff at random, tossing lots of magazines without clipping them...

My breeder sent me a new picture of one kitten—I don't know which one. She says the two who were slow to wean are now eating eagerly and gaining weight. I'm glad to hear that!

Hi there...

Today has been a very long day, I've been up since about 6am. I went to my old apartment and the cleaning crew came, they were excellent. Then, I showed my apartment to a tenant down the hall because he may move in there, he is very nice. After that, I had my first knitting lesson which was a lot of fun but difficult to learn, although I think I finally got the hang of the English knit stitch closer to the end of the lesson. My teacher is very sweet and I enjoy her company.

On the way home riding the train, I thought about W, my date and I just felt that something was off there. We were similar in many ways yet also very different. I called him when I got home and he said that he has some psych issues, his psychiatrist told him that he's not ready for the relationship. I felt sad but relieved in a way too. Then he said something that really took me by surprise, about hospital staff charging him with assault, I was floored. I told him I had to go and I felt very unsettled getting off the phone. I texted him that I couldn't make our next outing together and I blocked his number. It's sad but we weren't meant to be.

Sigh, I am exhausted, I'm going to bed.

Thanks for listening.

Good night.

Amy

Lilturtle: Hope your mouth is healing quickly after having the tooth pulled. Hopefully by now, you are without any pain.

Fiona: It sounds like your cleanup project is picking up steam if you're getting to the point you can toss magazines without going through them individually to clip. That must feel really good.

Amy: I'm sorry that things didn't work out with the gentleman you met but how fortunate for you that you followed your instinct and got all the information you needed to make a decision. Even though it makes you sad, I'm going to say good on you for making a quick decision to avoid a potentially messy situation.

Holly: It sounds like you are having a really busy summer. Hope you're able to get back into the swing of things with your exercise.

Ohio: Thanks for the good wishes.

I've been struggling emotionally since Sunday. I visited my parents on Father's Day and it was a bit stressful. As you know, my mother can be difficult. After thoroughly explaining that I'm buying only what I minimally need for clothes as I drop sizes, in order to save money, she got all over me about the fact that my pants were all baggy and looked terrible. Hello. It's the weekend. I'm not wearing my best fitting work clothes. It didn't matter.

Driving home, I was nearly hit head-on by a black jeep that was out of control and in my lane of the road. I swerved toward the ditch and they swerved away from me at the last second. I managed to pull it out of the ditch without rolling my vehicle and continued on my way home.

I was shaken and, of course, despite trying very hard to head it off, the episode has triggered even more post-traumatic stress symptoms. I'd been experiencing symptoms on Saturday but thought I had it under control. Now, my head is all over the map in terms of thoughts and emotions. I'm trying hard to use all the cognitive behavioral therapy lessons I've learned but I'm feeling myself slide down. I'm hoping if I get to the gym this afternoon, a hard workout will release some brain chemicals that will turn things around for me.

This is day 230 without a binge.

Melarie- Glad to hear the rush is over and that you're going on an outing with a work friend. I think it's important to develop friends that are both co-workers and friends outside of work.

Vermont- I hope you're able to get that workout in! I know how it is when you get in a slump and can't seem to get on track. Hope you get some riding time in, but I know that construction is frustrating!

lil turtle- I hope your mouth is doing much better. Getting teeth pulled is no fun at all. When I was in middleschool I had to have several teeth pulled in order to have braces put on.

Fiona- Such a cute kitty cat!!! I bet seeing the kitty is extra motivation for you and the BERP.

seabiscuit- Sorry to hear about how the person you were dating turned out. That's a bit scary. I think it is a blessing that he was open with you about it. I once had a guy whom I was head over heals for. He pretty much strung me along and made me think he liked me. One weekend he didn't talk to me at all. It wasn't until the next week he told me that he was in jail, but he wouldn't tell me why. I did some snooping and found that he had been arrested for attempted rape. I was hurt and scared. I ended up cutting off ties with him. Those situations are scary when they happen, glad you are avoiding it.

worththeeffort-Sorry to hear about your weekend. It's frustrating when mom's can't just be the loving supporter they were created to be. Just remember you are doing what works for you, don't worry about how other people see it. I think getting in a good workout today will do wonders for you. Just the other day I was feeling a bit down, but my workout really pulled me through it. I have found weirdly that if I'm depressed, weight lifting really helps me get out of that slump. Cycling on the other hand is a bad idea if I'm depressed. I just don't end up having the energy to get through the class. The last time I went to a class sad, I only stayed for half of it. It was ever more depressing knowing I wasn't going to finish the class. So I've just started skipping it if I'm really feeling bad, because going will just make me feel worse. I hope you have a workout that really helps you when you're feeling down.

As for me, I went to my interview yesterday. The facility is beautiful and the woman that interviewed me was very nice. It was one of those meet and greets to get to know you a bit more. Which is nice, but also worrisome. Basically, if I don't get a second interview it will be because they don't like me. I'm praying I get into the next round. It is a social services assistant position and I really feel like I can make a difference in the position. Also, it would be a great place for me to begin my social work career. I'm praying for God's will to be done, no matter the outcome, but really want this to work out. I'm scared of how I will react if I don't get a call back. It's just so depressing being in a job that depresses me and not getting many bites on the job hunt. :/

Hope everyone is doing well. I'm really trying to wrap my head around nutrition. Yesterday I definitely ate too much. I just don't know much about how I should be eating to lose weight. Anyone have any ideas? I'm trying to watch portions, eat when I'm hungry, drink lots of water. I guess I just don't know if I'm eating too much or too little.

I got dry socket which is very painful. I went back to the dentist today and they packed it with something that made it feel better instantly. No sleep again last night.

I'm so sorry to hear that. Was it a wisdom tooth that was pulled or just a regular tooth?

That's pretty funny, Worthy, that you think pitching magazines without clipping them is such a big step forward. It was pretty f***—umm, let me rephrase that. I'll say it the way I said it to a friend on the phone: "That was Evil Fiona. She did that to me the day we put out the recycle bins, so I didn't get to un-do that particular act of self-destruction." Yes, friends, the BERP is back to normal again, so I spent the day clipping magazines. And oh boy, I am so sick of clipping. We're talkin' massively, colossally sick of clipping.

But that's the whole thing with this project. I did not believe I was capable of doing this at all, but it is in fact happening, one magazine page at a time. All during the first 5-6 weeks I thought I was going to just get overwhelmed one day and quit. The fact that I haven't stopped doing the BERP is way more amazing to me than losing weight. Not because losing weight isn't hard—no, not at all—it's just that I have lost more than 100 pounds before, and I have lost all the way down to goal before, multiple times in my adult life. I haven't maintained my weight at goal for very long before, but I'll climb that hill when I get to it. I do think my approach is different this time round: This is the first time I've gone six months binge-free and sugar-free, that's for sure.

So anyway, I have a track record when it comes to losing weight. I have NO track record when it comes to tidying up my environment. Bob does the housework in our family. He even does my laundry for me. And he's doing every bit of the actual cleaning involved: he's been following me around with a vacuum cleaner and dust rag, as I move from one section of the BERP to another.

So this is totally amazing to me, that it's happening at all—let alone on a time table to be done before the kittens arrive!

But all is not completely peachy: I have, temporarily I assume, lost the ability to make a collage. I tried to make one over the weekend, and I couldn't do it. I couldn't do the picture-making that happens in my head, with my eyes closed, for at least a day or two before the picture-making that happens with paper and glue. My brain is too fried by clipping! =big sigh=

I know it will come back. I just need to get a chance to rest my inner eyeballs.

Anyway, maybe that was TMI, but I just don't want anyone thinking it was a good thing that I recklessly tossed a lot of the raw material for my work. That was impulsive and wrong-headed, and it won't happen again. The BERP moves onward—constructively, not destructively.

It was a regular molar.

Not much to report. I was supposed to weigh in today but didn't. I'm nervous since I didn't lose any last time.

Worth, I read of your PTS incident in the other thread..so that incident with the Jeep must have been terrifying. Congrats on not losing it!!!

Sabrina, I hope so much you get that phone call for a second talk!

Fiona, WTG on your focus on the BERP!

Amy, sorry the relationship will not go further, but maybe for the best . Hope you're enjoying the new digs!

lilturtle, sorry about no sleep again! no fun.

and Hi to everyone else, hope Kathleen is having fun in Ireland!

I love summer with the beautiful green, and my flowers, and my motorcycle, and my summer job. I have been avoiding the construction due to truly hazardous road conditions for a motorcycle and i go a total of 22 miles out of my way to avoid it. Eh, not that bad since I love riding, even on dirt roads.

Hi there...

I had a good day! I've moved on from my date, thank you for all of the support. I'm not sure if I am going to pounce back into the dating arena just yet, at least perhaps not the online one.

Tonight, I went to a WW meeting and I am thrilled that I weigh 21 lbs less than I did at my last WW meeting, yay! I truly connected with the leader which is a big thing for me. I bought the calculator for counting points so I am going to try that out. I think I will succeed this time! :D

I'm headed to see family this weekend and then I leave again next weekend to head to Nantucket to see family and friends. Yay!

Have a great night!!!

Hugs,

Amy

I really need to get on that scale but I'm scared. It's like my future happiness rides soley on me losing weight. I'm scared I can't lose it. Not enough anyways. I like to eat and I have a lot of trouble controlling it. Some days I can, some days I can't. I try and make up for it when I can by eating very little. I'm frustrated and scared. I never follow through on long term goals. If something takes longer then a day or a week, I give up. So much rides on this. I am disgusted with myself. How hard is it to eat and exercise like a normal person?

lilturtle: I'm sorry to learn you had a painful dry socket but glad the dentist was able to help stop the pain. I hear you on being frustrated about not being able to eat "like a normal person." I think a lot of us have been in that place. I think each of us comes to the place we're ready to make a serious change in our own time, too.

I know I was scared to give up sugar and carbs for a very, very long time. They were my only 'friends,' I believed. Sugar was my drug of choice. Bingeing caused me to 'numb out' so that, for the period of time I was bingeing, I didn't feel or think anything. My brain was just blank. Of course, as soon as the binge was over, shame, regret, self-hatred all came flooding back.

I was emotionally scared when I started my medically-supervised weight loss program in November of last year, but I'd also reached the place I was ready to make a permanent change. Do I still struggle with wanting sugar? You bet! The difference now is that I am strong enough to weather emotional storms and resist the urge to 'numb out' using sugar. I hope things get better for you.

Amy: Congrats for the successful weigh-in at WW.

I have a couple days off from work and we have beautiful weather! I'm shocked that the two things coincided! I made a trip into town this morning with the intention of going shopping. I hate shopping but I thought that it would be some "me" time. After 45-minutes and two stores, I was ready to head home.

Before leaving the house, I decided I would take a long walk in one of our large, local cemeteries as my exercise for the day, since I won't be going to the gym. I started for home but turned the car around and went to the cemetery and walked up and down the rolling--some really steep--paths for an hour. My Fitbit recorded that I burned 337 calories, so I'm happy with that.

I just asked my husband to pull his bike out of the pole barn and put air in the tires so I can try riding it. I haven't ridden a bike in more than 20 years. This is my reward to myself for sticking to my fitness program for the past several weeks. I use to love riding a bike but haven't done it because I was too fat and would have looked utterly ridiculous, I believed. Now I've almost reached Onederland, I'm going to give myself another chance to ride.

I did it!
 

I rode a bike! I rode a bike! I fixed the height of the seat all by myself and rode my husband's bicycle about two miles. My steering was quite shaky. I had completely forgotten how much upper body strength it takes to steer a bicycle. I'm going to have to find a safe, empty parking lot somewhere to practice.

AND, the other excitement...my new pants arrived today. The size 20 is now too large but the size 18 fits.

I'm so excited. :D

Couple of rough days there: Tuesday & Wednesday I had lots of depression pain. I thought today was going to be more of the same: that's how it started. But after taking two Geodon, this morning's pain blew completely away. (Geodon doesn't often work that well.) I was able to get some critical pieces of mail en route, plus run a couple of tedious errands, without much stress.

I'm certainly hoping that's the end of my depression problems for a while, because I have a busy weekend ahead, with my niece Margaret coming over for dinner tomorrow night, and my great-niece Grace coming over on Saturday to do more sorting of clippings.

The BERP has been semi-stalled for a few days, but I have managed to clip some more magazines, including a very demanding one that took two & a half hours to plow through. I'm hoping I'll wake up tomorrow in fine fettle and can kick things back into high gear.

Worthy— Congratulations on riding a bike! And on being down to size 18! Wow, you must be on top o' the world.

Trish— Sorry to hear you're in the weight-loss doldrums. But you've achieved a whole lot already: don't forget that fact! It's just a matter of getting your focus back. I call it doing a re-set, like sometimes you do with a piece of electronic equipment to make it function again. Give yourself a date—could be tomorrow, could be Monday, whenever—when you plan to do a serious re-set on your weight-loss effort. Get back on plan in your eating, do some walking if you can, and wait to weigh yourself until at least a week after your re-set. How does that sound?

Hi...
 

I'm popping over to say hi! Thank you for the kind words, which reminds me to go track my points. It was rainy here today yet I still managed to get a lot done.

I'm excited for my trip to NYC this weekend!

There's plenty more unpacking to do!

Take care!

Amy

Hi. I read lots of posts here. Thanks for the good reading. I am new here at 3FC. SO relieved, excited and happy to have found you all. I have lived a yoyo life. Sometimes being around 200 lbs and other times being much lower. Always depressed with a large serving of anxieties.

Right now I am sort of maintaining weight. BUT I have had a slip that seems to be lasting too long. My digestive system is wrecked due to the sort of dieting i used to do along with the depression and anxiety. I always know that gaining weight is just a slip away. If I am not vigilant, then its a one way ticket to a larger wardrobe. I have 5 sizes in my closet. Although the larger sizes are folded up and away from the front.

Like VermontMom, I live in VT. Or as I call it, the land of the often frozen tundra. I still am trying to recover from last winter, lol.

I loved reading the words of worththeeffort who rode a bike. Thats so awesome. Actually i was just glad to read everyones posts. I am grateful to have found this community. Thanks :)

Welcome!
 

flower123: :welcome: to our group! So happy you decided to post after reading along. Sorry about your depression and anxieties, but at least we can all relate in this group! Please feel free to continue to post. I hope you will find some support and encouragement here! :hug:

I'm back!
 

Hello Everyone! I had a bit of spotty wifi and internet while in Ireland, so I have kept in touch a little, but need to get back in the groove! We had an absolutely wonderful time on our vacation, but today it is back to reality! I am afraid that I went completely off my "diet mode" most of my vacation, so I am going to try hard to get back on board with healthy eating and exercise as quickly as possible, too. I need to move along right now, but I will check in tonight and try to write some personals. Hang in there, everyone, and know that I think of you often and keep you all in my prayers! :hug: WE CAN DO THIS!!! :grouphug:

Hi again!

Welcome Flower123 and welcome back believe!

I'm tired, I'll post later maybe.

Have a good day!

Amy

:welcome2: Welcome to the group, flower123. Glad you enjoyed my post.

I wore myself out this morning. I rode bike for about 40 minutes, then did a 40 minute walking interval workout. I'm ready for a nap!

My niece Margaret was a no-show for our Friday plans. =pout= I think what probably happened is she got home after work, thought she'd take a quick nap, and was out for the count. I called her cell, which is always near her, three times—no reply. But she's slept through its ringing before. The evening was a bummer for me: expecting to see someone, drink wine with them, get a little loose...and then it didn't happen.

As for my great-niece Grace coming over on Saturday to sort clippings, have dinner, and then play with our art journals, she had to cancel: a critical Girl Scout meeting took precedence. =pout again= Her mother is distinctly cool to me on the phone, too, so it's a bummer when we converse about Grace's schedule: it's like pulling teeth to get information out of her. I'm probably being paranoid, but I feel like I'm this weirdo art person whose social cues and social mores are way distant from hers. Oh well, it's Grace I want to be friends with, not her mother. I've known her mother since she was like 3 years old, and I never have understood what makes her tick. I've been attracted to Grace since even when she was a bratty two-year-old. Funny how chemistry between people can work that way.

Sorry to be so downbeat. My monthly weigh-in is Sunday, and I don't give a flying f*** what the scale says. I'm just focused on the BERP. I intensely, desperately, want for the BERP to be over... but it's not. Weeks to go yet! Arrrggh.... I hope all this effort feels worth it, once the changes are really palpable, and the kittens have arrived and are exploring their new territory. Otherwise, it'll just be a bad memory, something to be well shut of, something I'll never do again—no way, no how. I hope our life never gets that cluttered again, but if it does devolve into that, maybe Bob is just going to have to live with it.

Every collage artist I know is a hopeless magpie, and their houses are full of stacks and stacks of paper and books, and their studios are messy middens like you wouldn't believe. Why am I working so hard to buck the trend and get all my stuff neatly squared away? One simple answer: Bob. He wants an uncluttered house, and I love him deeply, passionately...so I'm going to try my darndest to give him what he wants.

Hey everyone,

I haven't received a call back yet for another interview... Unsure if that's a bad sign, because I can't remember if she said I'd get a call this week or next. Trying to stay positive and not get bummed out.

I finally finished my government class with an A. :) Started my economics class which is actually interesting.

Went to Joes Crab Shack today and had a lobster and crab steam pot. It was so yummy! Hubby and I got up early today and cleaned the house, went to lunch, then took a long nap before going to mass. Came home and had some wine, ate dinner, and will having another glass here shortly. Ah, the relaxing weekend. :)

Hey everyone,

I haven't received a call back yet for another interview... Unsure if that's a bad sign, because I can't remember if she said I'd get a call this week or next. Trying to stay positive and not get bummed out.

I finally finished my government class with an A. :) Started my economics class which is actually interesting.

Went to Joes Crab Shack today and had a lobster and crab steam pot. It was so yummy! Hubby and I got up early today and cleaned the house, went to lunch, then took a long nap before going to mass. Came home and had some wine, ate dinner, and will having another glass here shortly. Ah, the relaxing weekend. :)

Thanks IBelieveInMe2, seabisquit and worththeeffort2 for the warm welcome. Reading them actually makes me feel welcome. So I DO appreciate it.

I want to shout from the rooftops to those folks who struggle with weight issues. telling them about this place. But of course I cannot tell anyone unless they bring up their weight loss struggle in the moment.

Reading what people post here ispires me. It helps me to be more mindful of eating. And the support is great. I believe that i can settle back into a more secure maintenence routine again. But I am not there after the series of slip ups. Right now its battling that food craving gremlin that woke up when I slipped so many times. Trying to get it back to sleep again :)

Reading peoples words helps. I have been looking for this community (one like it) for a long time. Dont know why i never found it. Until now. Forgive me if I am repeating mysef. I am just so grateful.

Today wasnt half bad with the eating. While I ate 4 oz of mariaded mozerella balls (excess oil blotted off), it was not high carbs. Except for the cocoa powder which is my downfall. I have to be careful of both carbs and calories. But the cheese slip could have been worse.

Tomorrow is another day. I hope it will not be too hard. My goal now is to get that gremlin back into a sleep state. I think this depression and weight issues area will be a home base for me. I probably will feel most at home here. Thanks again !

a very quick pop in to :welcome: flower! (yes I am also still recovering from that LONG winter! :D ) and welcome back to Kathleen :hug:

Happy Solstice!
 

:bike: I'm feeling so happy about my mini-vacation this past week. Impulsively, I asked my husband to clean off his mountain bike and put air in the tires on Thursday. Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, I went for bike rides. Saturday was my longest ride, so far. Even wearing bike shorts (which I bought for a spinning class), I am definitely saddle sore today. :o

Since the bike shorts are in the laundry--I didn't do a load of wash after getting home again yesterday--and I'm sore, today's workout will be accomplished standing up. I haven't decided yet, if it will be the elliptical or walk/jog intervals but I suspect the latter, since it is a beautiful sunny day. I would burn more calories on the elliptical but I want to be outside enjoying the sunshine and fresh air while we have summer. :cool: All too soon, these beautiful days will be ice-bound memories! ;)

Getting outside to exercise everyday for the past three days has done wonders for my mood. I feel so totally normal. No sign of my depression anywhere. I love it! :cloud9:

At the lake
 

Back from Ireland and up at the lake for the weekend. I feel super spoiled, but I am loving it all!!! :D The sunshine is doing wonders for my mood, too. :sunny: I absolutely LOVE it! Makes me want to get outside and walk, walk, walk! In fact, we just came back from a walk with the pups here at the lake. Food has been better than in Ireland, but I find myself snacking here and there..... on Doritos, my downfall at the lake. :o I need to improve my snack choices, even here. Looking forward to getting back into our pool and doing laps during this week, amidst appointments and housework. I just need to FORCE myself to STOP and make time for exercise. Otherwise, the days fly by and I don't get it done.

Amy: Happy to hear that you survived the move! I hope you are enjoying your new home!

Fi: Sorry that your plans with both Margaret and Grace fell through. That is a bummer! Sounds like you are plowing forward with the BERP. I am in awe of your determination and the progress you are making!!! I need to do the same at my house. Hubby is so sick and tired of the clutter everywhere. I made a lot of progress with my organizer in my 2nd floor office, which was piled high with STUFF, but now the first floor has become all cluttered again. I won't be working with the organizer again until summer is over and kids are back in school, but I hope to get some things cleared on my own. I am happy that you are taking breaks when necessary, but you continue to move forward and make progress! WAY TO GO!!! :D

Sabrina: I hope you get the call back for another interview. I know that you are unhappy at your current job, and I hope something right for you will come along soon. Could you call and just say you weren't sure if they were going to call this week or next? The waiting is agonizing, I'm sure. CONGRATS on your A in your government class! That is awesome!!! :D

Holly: Thanks for the welcome back! How have you been?!?

flower123: So happy that you posted again and really like the group! There is so much support here, which helps in the weight loss journey. I sure hear you regarding the food craving gremlin. I think about food and crave it WAY to often. I need to tame my gremlin and put it to sleep as well. We can do it..... together!!! :hug:

Worthy: I am so happy that you enjoyed your mini vacation!!! HOORAY for YOU with all of the bike rides and exercise you are getting in! You inspire me to do better with my own exercise. :)

Waving HELLO to everyone else! :wave:

Hi there!

I'm writing from NYC, I'm heading back to Philly tomorrow. I've had a great weekend with family. I'll be glad to get home! I have had a lot of fun though and I head to Nantucket with family next week.

I am glad that I rejoined WW but the online program with meetings works best for me so I'm hoping to do that. I think I overate a bit this weekend but it wasn't terrible.

Take care. Have a good night.

Amy

First, have you tried popchips? They are so much lower in calories. No, they do not have all that cheesy goodness. But they crunch.
Second, the wild food craving gremlins. Yes. Perhaps we all could create a large orange poppy field like in the wizard of Oz. Where they fell asleep. And then.... well it could be a food gremlin sleeping area. Sugar and peanutbutter are amongst the countless foods that wake my gremlin up. Perhaps orange poppies will get it back to sleep. I am not talking about ingesting opiate poppies of course. But rather sending the gremlin over to the field. Hey, at this point I would try anything. :yawn:

:( I'm headed back to work today. My mini-vacation is over. Boo. :p I have another mini-vacation the first week of July, so I guess I'll survive until then.

Received a link to a blog post from MyFitnessPal that describes how to get the most out of a walking workout. I thought it might be of interest to some folks here. I do a form of the interval walk, described in number 2.

Hi Everyone!

Hope everyone is doing ok, and staying cool! :)

I have recently come to realization that I'm so overweight that is is really having a negative inpact on my life. I just hadn't realized just how out of shape I was. I mean I guess I knew theoretically, but I'm so much fitter than other people around me (I know, I know, don't compare yourself to others) that it seemed ok. But then I got on the elliptical after months of inactivity...did 20 minutes at lowest resistance and never even got to 3mph. I was exhausted and felt terrible for quite some time after. That is just ridiculous. Less than year ago I could do a really tough hour long interval workout on the elliptical followed by 40 mintues of yoga with no problem. Anyway, time for drastic measures. So the elliptical workout I can do now isn't much, but at least I'm doing something every day. And I'm restarting the Atkins diet. I did this before when I lost the 70lbs, and it worked really well for me, as I'm really carb sensitive, and I love meat and cheese. I weighed today (it was bad :() and I'm not going to weigh again until the first two weeks of induction are finished. I seem to have gotten my depression and anxiety under control, so it is time to start working getting my body in shape too. :)

Well, my weigh-in on the 22nd was boring: 272 again. Same as last month. But I don't mind boring. Looking at my graph on the fridge, I see that I'm still on track, following a steady downward line in my weight. Last month's 10-pound loss was unusual. This month's 0-pound loss is unusual. But when you look at them on the graph, they balance each other—if that makes sense. That's why I like weighing just once a month, and also having a graph.

Today I had to return to doing the BERP, which was hard. The only way I can make myself do it is that after I have my breakfast (2-3 cups of coffee w/ cream), I lie down on the green futon and do that slow-breathing exercise. Sometimes I count the breaths, sometimes not, but I do it for about 10 minutes, which is approximately 40-50 breaths. While I make those slooooooow inhales and sloooooooow exhales I picture myself doing whatever is the next step in the BERP—what I plan to start the day's work with. After those 10 minutes, I'm calm, focused, and magically in action—doing exactly what I visualized.

Tomorrow will be easier because it will be the second day of BERP-ing this week. No days off until Saturday, though. I'm working on a tough area: the dining room, which used to be my studio until I filled it up with crap such that I couldn't work in there anymore. Now my collage studio is upstairs in what used to be my writing office, so the dining room needs to become very tidy so either Bob or I can use it as an auxiliary work area. (We have no need for a formal dining room.) At least I got all the unwanted books out of it already, so I have a bunch of empty book boxes where I can stow stuff like my stationery collection. But first I have to get all the loose rubber stamps off the table and find accessible places for them to live—easier said than done!

I'm sorry I'm not writing personal comments. I'm just too overwhelmed by the BERP these days. =sigh= I think I'm going to have to do some more slow breathing, because right now I have no desire to wrestle with those rubber stamps.

Well, my weigh-in on the 22nd was boring: 272 again. Same as last month. But I don't mind boring. Looking at my graph on the fridge, I see that I'm still on track, following a steady downward line in my weight. Last month's 10-pound loss was unusual. This month's 0-pound loss is unusual. But when you look at them on the graph, they balance each other—if that makes sense. That's why I like weighing just once a month, and also having a graph.

Today I had to return to doing the BERP, which was hard. The only way I can make myself do it is that after I have my breakfast (2-3 cups of coffee w/ cream), I lie down on the green futon and do that slow-breathing exercise. Sometimes I count the breaths, sometimes not, but I do it for about 10 minutes, which is approximately 40-50 breaths. While I make those slooooooow inhales and sloooooooow exhales I picture myself doing whatever is the next step in the BERP—what I plan to start the day's work with. After those 10 minutes, I'm calm, focused, and magically in action—doing exactly what I visualized.

Tomorrow will be easier because it will be the second day of BERP-ing this week. No days off until Saturday, though. I'm working on a tough area: the dining room, which used to be my studio until I filled it up with crap such that I couldn't work in there anymore. Now my collage studio is upstairs in what used to be my writing office, so the dining room needs to become very tidy so either Bob or I can use it as an auxiliary work area. (We have no need for a formal dining room.) At least I got all the unwanted books out of it already, so I have a bunch of empty book boxes where I can stow stuff like my stationery collection. But first I have to get all the loose rubber stamps off the table and find accessible places for them to live—easier said than done!

I'm sorry I'm not writing personal comments. I'm just too overwhelmed by the BERP these days. =sigh= I think I'm going to have to do some more slow breathing, because right now I have no desire to wrestle with those rubber stamps.

Oh gosh, I'm worried. The reason why I haven't gotten new photos of the kittens is that they're sick. They have "a respiratory infection," Julie tells me. I hope it's just a cold and not something worse. =furrowed brow=