Good Morning,

I just gotta say it is sooooooo cold here in NJ. 20 degrees this morning, windy and raw. We usually don't get this until January/February <--- burrrrrr.

Did rather well with my food Monday and Tuesday, hope I can do it again today. Gotta work on the water. The colder it is out the less water I want to drink.

Whats shakin with you guys ?

Love, Leenie

I is pretty mild here. Kind of yucky though. I heard on the news that over where Cathy lives they got 7" of rain in the last 24 hours. No metter how much I hate our weather just a couple of miles away from her I see it could have been worse.

My mom had a long phone convsation w/ me last night. She really wants me to get off my meds and is thinking or everything to try to do this. She thinks I need to talk to someone but I don't think she understands that I am not ready to do that. She suggested that I write a daily journal b/c it worked for her. She did bring up the fact that I havn't been the same since my dad died and that was a couple of days before my 14th birthday. She said that she had never seen me grieve and that concerned her. I don't think that I have either now that I think about it.

Leens it is chilly here too....minus four celsius! Of course it could be far colder so I shall not complain.

Fianlly a day off! Though I got called 3 times to work since I got off work yesterday at 330...it is nice to be wanted but please.....

I worked 8 of the last 10 days with about a trillion other things thrown in there! I am off now until the 11th of Dec unless I give in but I will try not to ! I am going to clean my house today, finish up with the decorating, take on mount laundry, go pick out my table and chairs for the kitchen, tidy my girls room, fold and put away about 4 loads of laundry that are on my bedroom dresser, make stew for supper and maybe do my cards tonight with a nice bottle of wine.

DD 10 turns 11 on Monday so I have to organize her party this weekend with family and get her gifts ogrnized...she is getting her hair highlighted today as part of her gift from me.

DD 4 gets the day off kindergarten so I will let her sleep in for awhile.

There are some wicked flu bugs around...put knock on wood we are ok for now.

Well I have to go see DD 10 out the door to the bus...hope everyone checks in...come on you lurkers, at least say hi!

Bye for now! Eliz

Hello!!

We woke up to snow this morning...with ice underneath. People are slipping and sliding. Dad was going out for coffee and thankfully his pickup doors were iced shut. He has no business out there. Went to Stillwater yesterday to the lawyers...an hour after we got home they were losing power lines due to ice.

I rented 3 movies last night to watch today. They had a special of 89 cents per movie. I will crawl under the covers and enjoy them and stay warm. Chris is in bed for the day so I will inflict him to watching MY type of movies.

Saturday is Dad's 75th birthday. Thinking I will make a chocolate peanut butter pie for him. He loves pb. Mother had bought a 2 piece cake topper of a man sitting in a chair watching tv. So fitting of him. She never got to use it before we lost her so think I will put it on his pie. He will love it knowing Mother had bought it to use on a cake for him.

I splurged yesterday and had a Buger King Whopper. They were 99 cents. Boy did it taste good. I had not ate all day so it didn't do any major damage. A chocolate malt would have made it even better!!

Chris' caregiver brought lights over last night and put them around his windows. Sure looks nice and seasonal. Kinda makes me wish I'd went ahead and dug my stuff out and decorated the house.

Due to the ice and cold, I won't be doing laundry today... guess that's one good thing about cold weather. I don't want to burst my pipes. So glad we are not as cold as you are Liz!! brrrr

Well it's time to go aggravate Chris so will catch you all later

DO any of your guys have to run your water when it gets cold or do you have good insulation? I have to run mine when it drops below 32. That really isn't to often here. I have never been anywhere but here during winter so I have no idea what other people have to do. I was in Denver last year in April but it was only cold at the Winter Park ski resort. Thank god we were only at the park for one day. I can tell I have southerners blood. I was freezing up there!

Hope you all had a nice holiday. I got sick the last day of the vacation and missed the last couple of days from work. This sucks when you are a contractor, because you don't get paid. Anyway, the tum is feeling better and I am back to the salt mines.

Not much else going on here besides work. I do wish that the girls would get the chat room here open again.. I miss it! *Some* people on here don't turn on yahoo when they are online so the rest of us can'te tell when they are here.

Kem, ask your mother if you were a diabetic, if she would be telling you to get off insulin? Its the same THING! That just burns me up when people say that sort of thing. Meds are NOT the "easy" way out.. take it from me who has been dealing with this for 8+ years now. But, she does have a point about therapy. Meds are not going to fix everything in your life. When you become depressed, you start to have negative thought patterns. Meds can help alleviate the initial depression, but they do not change your negative thought patterns. That takes a lot of hard work on yourself and sometimes that means therapy. It has been statistically proven therapy and meds working together are far more effective than therapy or meds alone.. ask your doctor for confirmation of this. Much like quick fix diets.. this isn't going to work unless you do something to help yourself.

It's not cold here .. yet. Going to be in the 60s today, which is fine and dandy with me. It gets cold at night, which makes sleeping easier. Of course, it would be far easier if kittycat didn't walk all over me most of the night....

I am debating on when to start the cookie baking orgy. And before any of you ask, NO they do not ship well!! There really are only 2 weekends to cook before the company shuts down for the holidays, so I think I need to get cracking at this. I need to review my recipes and see how many I need to bake.... mmm the smell of cookies!!

Have a nice Hump day

I didn't want you to think I had ignored your post....I find that others and especially my mom are not very helpful when it comes to me......unresolved grief of any kind is a huge cause of depression...grief in itself can cause depression....tell your mother when she tells you things like you "should get off your meds" that it is not very supportive....my mother and I had our last major falling out after my son died....she said that it was selfish of us to want him back as he was in a "better place"....so I told her that I was selfish then because there is nothing more that I wanted then to have my baby back in my arms....my mother plays a huge role in my depression in that I always have so many expectations that she will actually be loving and supportive in my life and she is NOT so it feeds my feelings of inadequacy and low self esteem...it is my fault for allowing myself to expect more than she is ever going to give me....I have to find these things within myself and not look outside of myself.

Just my two cents worth! Eliz

OH, did I give the wrong impresion about my mom? She is a great mom and has always been supportive but she would much rather me not have to take the meds. I think she thinks if I journal my feeling that I will be able to fix myself. I don't hink I would know where to start. She also thinks that a lot of the issues that I am dealing with stem from an old boyfriend. He didn't treat me very well and I put up with him for 3 years. Boy that was a waste of my time.

Oh Liz, my heart ached for you when I read about your mother. I had a mother who was completely non supportive, very self centered and downright mean 95% of the time. She died two years ago and I have yet to mourn her.
Kempyd, perhaps your mother feels somehow responsible for your depression. (Mothers tend to blame themselves for everything concerning their children.) You, though, are an adult and know what's best for you. Perhaps, meds, therapy and journaling combined would be a good idea.
I woke up today feeling like cr*p. Am cold and achey. Gosh, I hope I don't get the flu that's going around. I hear it's terrible. I hear that it's going through school like crazy.

WAAAAAAA!!! I fell on Chris' ramp and have a 6" cut just below my knee. The kneecap is all black and blue. I got it to quit bleeding but may have to have stitches if it starts up again. I came down on the edge of the ramp with my full weight. Luckily the ramp is still in one piece. Bruised and cut knee, broken nose, what else can go wrong.

Kempyd I open up the cabinet doors under my sinks and let the tub drip and the faucets. And I don't do any laundry. I had pipes freeze up once and don't wanna go through that again.

Linda I am glad you feel better. Hate that you missed your pay though. Dang, there goes my Christmas present.

Kempyd I don't think anyone is saying your mom is not a good mom. Linda was saying that not being on insulin while a diabetic is the same as not taking your pills when depressed. If pills make you feel better, use them. Only you will know what your body and mind need to get you through the day.

Liz that had to have been horrible with losing your son and your mom doing what she did. Wow. My heart goes out to you.

Linda I come under the "some" who doesn't turn my Yahoo on. Sorry. I will try to get in tonite. I too miss chat and seeing everyone.

Linda you tramp!!! Make cookies that ship well !!!

WOW mothers & ex-boyfriends !

I have to agree on what lizzy and linny say about the meds. Stay on them. When Mom gets her degree and becomes a Dr. then I might listen to her. I think all mothers are kinda like that in one way or another, but you know we still love them dearly. Give her a big hug, I think she only means well but doesn't realize what she's saying.

Boy I'm hungry today.

Getting over the death of some one is one of life's hardest things to do. Like you all know I've lost my dad, brother and a few years ago one of my sisters. I don't think I'll ever get over losing her. I'm just learning how to deal with it better and thats all I can do, I guess thats all anyone can do. Every day for over 2 years I would cry like crazy on my way to work. I got so depressed I crashed right back into that pit and ate & ate. Now that the habbit is formed it is very hard to break, but I'm trying.

Boyfriends..........uhhhhhhhhh we all have horror stories, don't even get me started

LINNIE !!!! cookies growl !!!

Did I mention I was hungry ?

TTYL, Love Leenie

Leen are you hungry? lol

Thanks guys, I needed to hear that the meds were good for me. I think that my mom does blame herself in a way for what I am going through. Maybe that she couldn't protect me from my fathers death and save me from my evil ex. She did point out that my dad was the center of my universe and when he died I just gave up on everything. One good thing that has happened is the I found an awesome husband. Mom said he reminders her of dad. All the good things about him are in Joe. That made me feel good. I guess subconsiously I still have my daddy around by being with Joe. (Is that sick?)

Sweet did you fall after you talked tous this morning? Was it due to all of the ice around. My mom slipped once on an icy step and broke her arm. I know that stuff can be dangerous.

I don't know if I told you all this but you guys are my rock. You make me see things in a different light. I am forced to review certain things about me. I am soooo thankful for you guys and that you let me join in here.

2 movies watched, small nap, Dad fed, dishes washed..whew. Now I will go lay back on the bed and watch movie 3 and whine about my knee to Chris.

Yes kempyd, I fell after talking to you all this morning. I hate ice, unless it is in my tea. It's finally quit snowing. Don't think we got a whole lot but hate it nontheless. The next snow will be better as then I can make snow icecream. I've always heard not to use the first snow of the season...wonder why.

A lady from LifeLine called this afternoon to see how Chris was doing after his call to them a couple days ago. I told her he was fine at the moment but if I beat him up would she take care of him...that he gets to be such a MAN when the weather is nasty and/or he can't get out. She laughed and said to just call them up. She was from Massachusetts and said they were really getting snow today. I have no doubt that they get worse weather than we do.

Linda I am gonna send snow your way. How dare you sit in 60* weather!!! Not being used to the snow and ice I bet you'd call in sick just to keep from having to drive in it. THEN you'd have time to find recipes for that ship well and would send us all a few dozen.

Later chickies.....

Hi everyone,

I was reading your posts. We don't have snow here & I live in the northern part of western Canada. It has been a lot milder than usual....but we always have snow for Christmas.

I have been doing better since Monday...so I will see how I do in the next week before I see the Dr. I do have to see him this month for renewal of my meds anyway.

Kem....I live in a place where it can go down to -40C or colder. I do laundry even when it is that cold. Our houses are very well insulated.
They say that subconsiously we end up marrying spouses like our mothers. It was on the news lately. So we all want our mothers!!!

I did get out today...went to my Wednesday A.M. coffee with friends. Then I ran a few errands.

It is getting colder...it was -4C...but we have no snow on the ground.

April