Depression and Weight IssuesHave you been diagnosed with depression, are possibly on depression medication, and find it affects your weight loss efforts? Post here for support!
Honey, (((HUGS))) It's going to get better from here on in, please believe me. You did such a smart thing by going in to get some support from a counselor. Good for you, smart thinking!
I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. You're gonna be okay, you're gonna make it.
P.S. I'm guessing your icon means you like birds? You should see my front yard. I set up a couple of finch feeders and the finches just love it! The finches are kind of dull-colored for winter, but come spring and summer, they are the prettiest yellow you can imagine! And every once in-awhile we see an Eastern Bluebird, which is a real treat! Do you have a bird feeder?
Last edited by HealthierLori; 01-25-2010 at 02:59 PM.
I feel for you, I feel your pain but I refuse to feel sorry for you because pity is the last thing I think you need.
As a group we will grieve with you and support you in your depression, give us some time!!! You posted today, most of us only come here once a day in the afternoon.
That being said (and welcome btw)
I read most of your post and I seriously feel your pain and I understand the hole where you are right now.
I cant tell you what to do but I can tell you what I see. I see someone that despite they feel horrible and depressed, they are still seeking help both online and in real life. I see someone that despite they feel weak, they are not.
I know little task and little things seems overwhelming sometimes but I personally think you are doing great at dealing with all of it so far.
For that, I congratulate you and Im extremley proud of you.
Focus on the effort you are making and forget the husband a second. A lot of people are not able to show their emotions but it doesn’t mean they don’t feel. But right now I think you really don’t need to see his. I mean you already have your own emotions to deal with, do you really want him to start crying and feeling sorry for himself? You wouldn’t be able to help him much as you need to help yourself (which you are doing great so far) maybe it is the same for him to you know.. Maybe he cant help you cause he is helping himself.
All of this to tell you that you are welcomed here and if you give us a little bit a time, you’ll see that this is not high school and there is no click or group already formed. Just a bunch of chickies helping each other. I don’t remember half the names of the people here but it doesn’t mean I don’t care when I read the posts, like this one for example.
One thing I learned from my own depression was: Every seed must die before it grows.
It must hurt in order to improve, move on and be a better person. Without downs, there is no ups.
Depression is an illness, it is temporary and you will see the end of it, I promise you. Just hold on.
I'm with Zofia, you don't need pity right now. You do need someone to understand and support you through this time. I have never had anyone close to me die and I'm 45. So I can't imagine what my state of mind will be. I had one aunt die and it was painful for me because I didn't spend time with her that I could have because I was angry with my father.
As for your husband I have one that doesn't show lots of emotions. He got excited when I told him I was pregnant and that lasted all of 24hrs. He was excited at the wedding til we said I do and He was excited about the baby being born all of two days. He had three days off and since my parents were in town he went to work after a day. I've only seen him cry once and that is when he was telling me about the passing of his father. One of my aunts died and it hurt because I had some regrets and he told me I just need to get over it and let her go. REALLY??!! So your husband is just doing his thing. They are wired different and if he hasn't seen a man show emotion or teach him how then he doesn't know and probably won't.
As for the giving up...on what? You have come this far so keep going. I noticed early on this site that most responses and replies are in the afternoon or evening. Like another poster said, some people are lurking and can only read. I rarely come to this thread because I don't have issues with depression. If you need lots of support you can get it on here but consider where you post, try high traffic threads. Like "Weight Loss Support". I hang out there and Calorie Counters. I was here two weeks before I found a thread that had I known existed I would have been on there mostly. So search the site it is a wealth of information, support and love.
MRS. BRADY ~ I just come on here now, and saw your headline; and immediately came to it as soon as I saw it! Many people work and don't come until the evenings and weekends. I hardly ever come in here in the morning, if ever? Most times, I come here in the late afternoon or in the evenings, as I do all my housework in the AM; and my shopping, errands, and cooking in the daytime as well.
Honestly, there is no conspiracy here ... I respond to those that I hope that I can offer some support or help to as I am doing now. Some people may be just guests who cannot post; but others may not know what to say. I am so glad to hear that you are seeing a counsellor becuz that was the first thing that crossed my mind -- you will likely find that very helpful.
Everyone grieves in their own way; it is a very personal thing. You know that your DH does understand how you feel, but that isn't going to take the pain away; and he may not know what to say to help you. Is there really anything that can take the pain of grieving away? Only time ...
I lost both my grammies and my mother many years ago, plus some aunts; and I was very close to one gram as she was like a surrogate mother for me too. Everytime we had holidays, I would go and stay with her and she even looked after me for a period of my life when I was young, and I remember it all so well.
I think of them often with fond memories and some sadness, but I know that they are at peace and not suffering down here anymore; and I'm glad for that the most. They were awesome people and helped so many; and I hope that I may have gleamed some of that from them. We have taken some nice happy pictures of them and had them blown up; they are in my livingroom now, and I find that helps so much to remember the wonderful, vibrant people they were/are ...
^Sending up some prayers^ for you that you will have some peace and comfort during this challenging time in your life. There are lots of people here that care, and soon you will know that for sure ...
I'm so sorry about your grandmother and your aunt. I can tell from your posts that you are in a lot of pain.
Please don't take the number of responses as any reflection on you. It's easy to infer that various things that happen on public forums are personal, when it really can be as simple as more people saw one post than yours. Or the titles attracted different amounts of attention. Or the titles were so similar people thought they had already read that one, when it was really different. Me, I consider myself a thread killer. A thread can be super active and then I post and all you hear are crickets. I know it's not me, it's just timing or people decided right before I got there that everything that needed to be said was said and abandoned the thread.
Depression makes me assume things are about me when they aren't. I assume that everyone is judging me when I'm out running errands or I think that because a friend hasn't called it's because they don't like me. But that's just projection. I'm projecting how I feel about myself onto those around me, when in reality, they either aren't even paying attention or at the very least not thinking anything negative.
Please don't give up and please keep posting here. We'll get to know you well if you stay, but you have to give it time. Anyway, I'll be thinking about you and wishing you and your family well.
Not going to let you be the thread killer on this one, CLC. I've done that too, had the last post in a thread, and wondered the same thing: Hey, where did everybody go? Is it my breath?
Thanks for everyone's support. Not quite out of the woods yet. My psychiatrist's appointment got bumped up to tomorrow, and we're trying to move my routine therapist's appointment up some time earlier than 3/2.
Man, I could highlight and quote EVERY single poster here, because I could have said all those things too what a bunch of wise ladies here! to you Mrs. Brady...I'm so sorry about your grandmother.
And please do know that 3FC chicks are the most supportive people anywhere. I have felt rejected in my own m'cycle forum, where I am the mistress of the darn place some days I don't get a response to something insanely brilliant that I've said and it puts my nose out of joint for the day. But then the next day is better (that's about how my depression runs also)
and I don't know how we live with our chosen mates sometimes They seem SO callous to our feelings sometimes. Their wiring really needs work
Hi, Lovebirds! I'm so glad to see you posting again! I've been watching for your posts because I'm worried for you and hoping everything will be okay!
I lost my Mom 8 years ago. That first year especially was pretty hard. I'd be in a store and there would be some song on in the background that she used to listen to and it would remind me of her, and I'd start crying and have to leave the store. It's rough when you lose someone. Time makes things a little easier, but you never totally stop missing them.
I wanted to say, you have such a delightful sense of humor! That's a good sign of the spark of life, when you still have a sense of humor!
Anyway, just wanted to say, I'm pulling for you and I'm here.
ok so wow....a lot of reading!! Love I know you have been in the monthly chat and the more you post there the more we can get to know you and help you. I did the same thing as you. I couldn't find my way in that people would talk then I went to the monthly chat and just started postin EVERY day sometimes more and then everyone usually does personals and we reply to each other. I honestly most of the time go right to that thread read and post and exit..LOL. I just happen to not be able to sleep and decided to look down thru the list! SO KEEP POSTING in the monthly!