I am occasionally a compulsive overeater. I know when I'm doing it that I am looking for something - a feeling, a relief, a satisfaction. But although I see it happening, and I know I'm circling the kitchen like a vulture, what can I do to STOP the compulsion? Stop the want? Fortunately this doesn't happen to me often, but it does sometimes and I never talk about it, I just torment myself until it's over and then I can go on with life. But right now my only choice is to go to bed. Which I'm going to do right now.
Jennifer,
I suppose I need advice on the same thing. I don't know how to stop it. Sometimes I feel like I have a brain disorder, because normal don't do this. *sigh* I know I don't have a brain disorder, but when I don't binge eat I get on the computer, play with my little boy, call a friend, or get on the good ole' geek box. Maybe I need to pin point what I feel I am missing when I am "circling the kitchen like a vulture"(I love how you stated that!)
I don't know about how to stop the compulsion, but you definitely can get rid of the food in one swift moment of rational clarity. It's a small window, but when that moment comes (It usually goes like this ~ "What am I doing to myself, this is insanity!!!"), I quickly ruin my binge food by putting salt, sugar, hydrogen peroxide, bleach, etc. (whatever is around really ~ I've used a few squirts of soap). I used nail polish remover one time. Anything that risks certain death if you try to eat the food is good. But salt & sugar really ruin food too.
As for the compulsion itself, I can't help you there. I don't understand my compulsion, because it comes along so sporadically regardless of my emotional state. When you are 'circling the kitchen like a vulture', how are you feeling? Sad? Stressed? Anxious? I'm sure since you said this only happens occasionally, I bet if you did some serious self-analysis, you may figure out what causes your compulsion.
I too have this problem. Its terrible, while I was at school I starved myself without a problem and finally at the end of the year got to eating healthy to lost weight. Now I am home and I find I cant just eat normally, if I eat anything it has to be everything because I have already failed at starving myself. Lame, I know. Then theres the fact that my job for the summer is in a bakery, and even though as a kid I never liked sweets at all, now that I have gained weight it seems like it doesnt matter if I dont like it so much or not, just the fact that its there.
Sorry I had to vent. I like this website, I just wish I could make myself stick to it more..
I think one of my main problems is, as much as I try to be healthy, while living at home it seems like I am in a vaccum. My mother is overweight and doesnt make attempts at losing it, and my sister has always been a stick without effort. I never had an issue with my weight until a few years ago, and this on and off starving and binging has made me fatter than I ever was. I hate it so.
Jennifer, the sad thing is most of the time I don't even try to stop it. The majority of time I just give in to it and I can't seem to stop myself. I have avoided sometimes it if I head out the door and go for a long walk until the feeling pasts.
HarpoChicoGroucho I love this idea because there is always that few seconds when I think I shouldn't do it. This would be the perfect few seconds to ruin the food. I'm going to use this one, thanks
I'm so sorry you had a rough time last night, Jennifer. I think you did the right thing... you used a coping mechanism. Going to bed isn't always the most ideal solution, but it's one of many we can use when we need to.
I agree with Harpo... there's "a small window of ration clarity" (love it, Harpo!), and if we can use a little bit of extra energy to act within it, we can usually deal with the feelings.
You know how people have all these "great ideas" like going for a walk, having a bubble bath, etc to stave off the binge? I think it works for them because they ARE being rational when they make that choice. They're not sitting on the couch thinking, "I should really go for a jog. But I'm pretty tired. And it's a lot of work putting on my running shoes. And it's raining." They're not waiting to allow their emotions to overcome them.
Like Christine when she goes for a walk... they're just DOING it, you know?
hi Jennifer I too get these compulsions. I try to walk away and take some deep breathes go outside or anything to get out of the kitche. I give myself 10 minutes and if I still want it I have a small portion of something. Of course, this does not always work but it does a good amount of time.
Hi Jennifer,
I feel you. I have circled, gone in and out, opened and shut cupboards and fridge, opened containers, picked it up... put it down. Obssessd about what could I eat? What ? What? what? I have prepared something and thrown it out { damaged, so I wont try to get it later... gross I know} Somtimes I am victorious. Sometimes [ not as often] I cave and sometimes I have a reasonable amount. I have had a spoonful of jam to stem a sweet craving. I keep next to nothing in the house. This is not the answer but I know myself at this point it is what I need to do. Maybe later I can be around my "drug"
Despite all this I am getting stronger. I mean really! I find a HUGE motivator is exercise. I do NOT want to undo all my hard work so I stay away or make a very smart choice.
Find your satisfaction in your will, find relief in your successes so far. Look deep inside and KNOW this is not who you are. This is not all you were meant to be. Try writing on paper or here. I find so much relief in all of you that I am not some kind of freak. That others are going through this and making it.
In the end just turn away and you CAN do it!! I know you can .. cause I have. All the best . Rowan
If I'm at home, I jump on the computer and come here and read. That helps me soooo much, I'm 11 days binge free. I think that's the longest in 22 years!
If I'm away from home, I take a walk. No matter what I'm doing, I get up and walk a few minutes and remind myself why I'm doing it. It's helping a great deal.
If I'm having that feeling that I can't quite get filled....I'm not so sure I binge so much, but I do the vulture thing ( I still have three qt sized bags of my Homemade Choc chip cookies in my fridge and I have touched not one) I am prepared. I keep three different kinds of SF jello in the fridge cubbed ready to go (sweet are my nemesis) with Cool whip free. You can honestly eat a grip of this with no real consiquence. Or a choc protein shake works too but the calories are higher.
Thank you all! I'm going to attack my naughties with salt or something else that doesn't match.. ON the bright side, I was feeling so weak today. I was stressed and I wanted to drown it in some ice cream. I got in line at the DQ today and I was wrestling with what to order because nothing was good for me. The cashier was getting frustrated with me and I finally just blurted out DIET COKE! Ha! Now let's do that for the next 364 days!
One thing I have done is use hot coffee or broth to stave off that feeling of just needing to eat anything. Other times, I sit down and journal my food and exercise and come to the realization that I dont want to cave in. This is at times that I really shouldn't be hungry. If I really have to have something, I go for fruit and usually the sweetness will satisfy my cravings.
Way to go Jennifer each time you do that you get a little bit stronger at resisting. It feels so good when you are victorious over food and don't let the binge monster get control.
Besides getting out of the house and going for a long walk I have also done a few other things. Telling myself that the kitchen if off limits after supper helps. In some of those crazy, I want to eat moments I make myself down 16 oz of water. Making my stomach feel full sometimes is all I need.If choose to eat at least I won't be able to eat as much after drinking the water.
I have taken the advice of my dr who gave this advice to my husband when trying to quit smoking. He told him, change your habits. EX: If you get up and the 1st the you do is smoke (or in our case Eat), then don't. Wait a few minutes or so. Do something else first.
So change your habits. Write down when you have these urges and see if you can see a pattern. Such as if you get the "munchies" while watching tv, then get up and walk in place or go outside or do something else. I am going to try this. I have to do something here.
Only toughie for me is work. I can't exactly get up and walk out everytime I have a craving. lol. So I think I will just have to be sure to drink lots of water and bring some healthy snacks to snack on and avoid the vending machine! (they even have icecream in there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Jennifer, that's wonderful!
I can relate. One of my girlfriends and I get so stressed going through drive-throughs. Our blood pressure almost goes through the roof as we're trying to quickly read the menu and make our choices while 39 cars are lined up behind us and the cashier is grinding his/her teeth over the speaker.
Sassy, the "changing your habits" idea is excellent!