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Old 03-24-2006, 08:06 PM   #61
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I forgot one thing, my little sister also has autism which helps me eat when Im stressed unfortudantly
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Old 03-24-2006, 10:56 PM   #62
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Kristen, thanks for sharing your story I'm so sorry to hear of the struggles you have had to deal with. I understand about that stubbornness, I went through that period too!! Blame it on youth, I guess. I always ate right after I got home from school too. We had alternating lunch periods and some days we had to eat lunch at 10:45 a.m. and other days it was 12:45 p.m. I was usually ravished when I had first lunch. It's great that you have an acknowledgemnt of your eating problems at such a young age! I think it's very advantageous to try to recover at a younger age. I was a mess in high school. I went through anorexia(10th grade)/bulimia(11th grade) and finally bingeing and compulsive overeating during my senior year and I gained 100 pounds in less than a year. And now after 5 years, I'm still struggling daily. I wish I had knowledge about ED's or nutrition and exercise then. But it's great you do!! You know your trigger foods and that's one of the first steps in combatting bingeing.

Be positive and keep your head up! Don't be shy on here, we confess everything!!
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Old 03-25-2006, 11:49 AM   #63
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Kristen thanks so much for joining us Hugs to you! I know how stressful it is to be a teen who worries about weight..I was 8 the first time I put myself on a diet and by the time I was 13 I was binging and by 15 I was bulimic....One tip for you NEVER go down that road!! Once you start that, your binging goes to a whole new level and it stays with you for life, just like a drug or alcohol problem bulimia eats at you your whole life, you constantly worry about slipping up. I am 29 now and am on day 5 of no binges and 3 months since my last bulimia slip up.

WAY TO GO on realizing that what you are doing is unhealthy and getting some exercise going! You have already chosen the right road, now just never look back.

My warning about bulimia comes from me because I have a 16 year old best friend (Yes its unusual for a 29 yr old to have a BF that young but we have a history together that bonds us) She knows of my bulimia problem and swore she would NEVER take that road, she called me a week ago (she lives in VA I am in MO) and tells me she binged and purged and begged me for help. It is so hard on teens these days, even harder than it was for me in high school. I am now trying hard to help my friend from this far distance and I am hoping she can beat this thing.

As far as the eating after school thing....If you like fruit you could try to come home and make you a huge fruit platter. When I am extremely "snacky" (aka BINGE INEVITIBLE) this is my first line of defence, I will peel an orange and seperate the sections and put them on a plate, then an apple gets cut up and on the plate, then a banana, and usually a salty treat such as mini Pretzels or something like that. By the time you are done fixing it the urge to eat everything in the house gives way to being ready to eat your fruit, and with this you get 3 of your 5 servings of fruit or veggies a day and fruit really fills you up. This is the only thing I have found to control my binges. If you prefer veggies get some broccoli, cauliflower carrots or whatever and a small amount of low cal dressing for dipping

No worries about long posts ok? Mine are ALWAYS long haha........

Good luck and make sure you drink LOTS of water
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October 19 2006....Posting tonight made me see that I am so in fear of bulimia that I am trading it for Anorexia....and honestly it scares me to death. Why does this world make us think we have to be perfect?
December 19 2006...I feel stronger. Not much but a little bit. Having my family and friends knowing my problem helps more than I thought it would. Anyone out there battling with me please KNOW my heart is with you!! We CAN GET THROUGH IT!
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Old 03-26-2006, 04:00 PM   #64
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I second Lealee's warning about bulimia. Never go this route!! I won't go into the problems the disease can cause (there are a myriad of them), but it isn't worth it. It's what really taught me binge eating in the first place. I never had a bingeing problem until I decided to shove my fingers down my throat when I was 16. And it's been 7 1/2 years and I still haven't broken the habit.

I kind of had a mini-binge on chocolate yesterday that made me sick almost all day, so I didn't eat anything else until last night when I felt better and that was cheetos and butter popcorn. So it really wasn't a binge (I didn't get full), but more like bad choices. I don't know what to classify that as. It was the same issue where I made bad choices and I would have had to force myself to eat more, because I had no cravings. I had thought about going to Taco Bell, but I really didn't want anything from there. It was weird. I guess it's a small victory because I didn't turn it into a monster binge. I don't know why I do that anyway. It's almost like I'm forcing myself, like I say, "you may as well get something else bad in because it's back on plan tomorrow." And then I don't even enjoy the food most of time. I've really lost a preference for fatty foods. I'd much rather have my teriyaki stir fry or fried brown rice than macaroni & cheese or a cheeseburger. Chocolate is a different story though. I still have incredible cravings. It's a hormonal thing, isn't it?
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Old 03-26-2006, 04:20 PM   #65
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I was pretty good this weekend

Although I did have like 6 brownies over the 2 day span
I LOVE CHOCOLATE!! It's so hard for me to not binge on it!

I wonder if they make somethign like fake chocolate?

Mmm! yummy
lol Ok anyway
I did lots of exercise and I was pretty god I had I'd say 2 semi binge free days because I didn't binge on the brownies technically because I made them really small like 2 inches on all sides, and I ate like 2 on saturday
and then 1 in the morning on sunday and then 2 with lunch on sunday.

I think I was upset and thats why I binged though because on friday I made plans with my friend to go bowling and I said call me when you want to go she said ok, and never called me! I don't know if she forgot but she was on AIM yesterday and she didn't even say anything about it! weird

Anyway I have spinning club with my Ms. D my coach who I just love, she's so positive and she pushed you to workout hard but she's still not mean.

Anyway I think I had like 2 binge free days if you guys consider the brownie thing not techinically a binge lol I don't know

I just feel like I need chocolate, the chemicals in it make us happy so how can It be bad right? lol

talk to all you ladies later
Love you all!
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Old 03-26-2006, 09:11 PM   #66
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i feel really bad right now. i had about 7 chocolate chip cookies (i'm at work) and there are still more here! i'm working for another 2 hours and i can't stop thinking about the cookies that are here... it's sick, like they are talking to me or something. The worst part is that i get such a sense of relief when i eat one, which just feels wrong somehow. Why does food have to make me feel better in such a pwoerful way.
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Old 03-26-2006, 09:55 PM   #67
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I don't feel so hot this evening. We went to MIL today and I had a large plate of lasagne and chocolate cake for dessert . I went with Dh, son and dog went for about a two mile walk this afternoon, then around 5:30 more lasagne! (consider that supper!) I hope I did not do much damage. I know it could have been worse, BUT I could have made better choices with the WOE I'm trying to follow. I'm also looking for TOM to visit in the next day or two, fun huh!?!
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Old 03-27-2006, 01:38 AM   #68
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I had all the cabbage rolls and lasagna you could imagine this weekend thought it went well with the chips I've been eating non stop


Tomorrow is a brand new day though and I have full intentions on eating well and staying away from the junk.Wish me luck.


Someday I will tell my story too, maybe if I write it down I will start the healing process and end the bingeing process

Take care, eat well, live each day like theres no tomorrow
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Old 03-27-2006, 06:32 AM   #69
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Big hugs, girls.

I haven't gone over my calorie count, but I'm way off track with my eating. I've started eating crap instead of healthy foods, and I'm so worried that I'm headed for a full-out binge.
I had popcorn with butter for lunch yesterday, and two packets of toffee for my dinner.
All I want to do is eat bad stuff... it's consuming my thoughts.
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Old 03-27-2006, 09:04 AM   #70
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Looks like we all had a bad weekend

Ellis I have been the same way. No real binges (except yesterday) but I am eating crappy food almost every time I eat.

I am looking foward to getting back on track today although with Spring Break and the kids being here that could be hard. I am going to do my best though.

Went to Long John Silvers Saturday and had a huge A&W rootbeer So I honestly think that started Sundays binge. BTW the new Butter Lobster Bites there are really yummy but ultra oily to me. Told you I have been eating awful. But it was good

Gave myself a reward for my little goal of being able to Jog now...I cut my hair...My hair was down to my waist and now it is barely brushing my shoulders. It feels SO awesome its unbelievable. I figured after a total of 27 lbs gone I deserved a treat (ticker is set at the weight I was when I got my treadmill, my highest weight was in late November and was 160)

Good Luck to all today on getting back on track!!
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September 7 2006: The first time I was happy with the way I look.
I feel great, I like my body shape. I feel in control.
October 19 2006....Posting tonight made me see that I am so in fear of bulimia that I am trading it for Anorexia....and honestly it scares me to death. Why does this world make us think we have to be perfect?
December 19 2006...I feel stronger. Not much but a little bit. Having my family and friends knowing my problem helps more than I thought it would. Anyone out there battling with me please KNOW my heart is with you!! We CAN GET THROUGH IT!
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Old 03-27-2006, 10:15 AM   #71
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Hey ladies!

I had an ok weekend with eatingas I probably told you, but my sister ( who has autism) was screami ng and having fits all weekend I have the same heachache from saturday afternoon and it just won't go away. She drove me crazy! So now Im exhausted and I think Im catching what ever she had since she was sick. So im home from school and Im missing my spinning club! Oh well. When I feel a little better I'll exercise this afternoon.

Anyway, I am going to have to restrain myself from eating everything in the house today!
Wish me luck
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Old 03-27-2006, 10:40 AM   #72
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Yesterday was as close to bingeing as I've come in quite a few months. I had a good breakfast, but ran into problems at lunch. I made a turkey sandwich, but apparently I've had them too frequently recently and just couldn't make myself eat it... I kept getting grossed out. So, half a sandwich down and I threw it away, had an apple and then a carrot, as I was still pretty hungry. Two hours later the other people in the house decide they're hungry too, so we go out for Chinese. I knew I shouldn't eat a whole lunch, but I did anyway, and was way too full after. Couple hours after that, the one guy who didn't eat lunch was suddenly starving, so they ran out to the grocery and got some yummy chicken fingers - buffalo and regular. Still not hungry after the big lunch, but managed to scarf down several chicken fingers (BIG ones, too) anyway. Enough was enough, I didn't eat "dinner" proper, at least, nor did I allow myself an Oreo snack pack... I had been kind of looking forward to that...

So, it's nice to know that I've managed to gain at least some control. But, my triggers are emotional and not sugar/carb related, and since I was in a good mood, that may have made the difference.

And, the weekend was The End of a whole week of general overeating. Not bingeing, really, just too large portions at each meal. I was getting a little out of hand. But, this is a brand new week, the last week of the month, and I am due to measure and take progress pics at the end of March soooooo... time to quit leaning over the side of the wagon and settle back firmly into my seat!

-Lala
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Old 03-27-2006, 11:14 AM   #73
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Finally feeling in better control in the past 5-6 days...lots of reasons are playing into this:

1) I participated in a garage sale this past weekend and sold a lot of my 'fat' clothes...bye-bye fat jeans...no turning back so I have to make sure I keep at my current weight (I did keep a few of the nicer things. DH and I hope to start trying for baby #1 next year so I will need a few bigger items)

2) I saw a family member this past weekend who has been doing a super job with her weightloss and it has helped to get my rear back in gear.

3) The biggest emotional trigger the past 6-7 weeks: my MIL is a very difficult person to get along with. Long story short - she wasn't a mother, she was a birth giver...that's basically where her mothering stopped so DH basically raised himself and is an awesome person. Because of their past, DH basically makes sure she has what she needs (shampoo, etc...) and that's just about the extent of the relationship. She has MS, lives in a nursing home and is in a wheelchair so every once in a while we would take her out to eat. The problem is, she's always pushed people away and DH and I are the only people in a 500-mile radius that give a darn about her and she is extremely disrespectful in public places and generally makes us miserable during the course of our outings. An incident happened about a month ago that was the last straw for me. Since then, I have chosen to not be around her because it always causes conflict. The nicer you are to her, the worse it comes back to bite you.

Anyway, her sisters and mother came into town this past weekend and they were aware of the 'incident' I referred to earlier. I like the rest of his family very much and did not want my feelings for MIL to affect how they feel toward me or act toward me so I have been binging ALOT over the past month or so - either out of worry or that they wouldn't accept me anymore, I don't know why...

The good thing is DH does not force me to spend time with MIL. He is completely supportive of my decision to 'remove myself' from situations with her.

After the 'incident', I told DH that MIL would never have the opportunity to treat me the way she treated me. I was not raised in a family that is hateful to one another on a day in/day out basis. That's NOT the way family should treat one another. But that's the way she treats everyone - like dirt (to push them away). I do not let people treat me like dirt and I do not let people treat my DH like dirt.

I think I just decided last week that if she or her family do not want to spend time with me, then that's ok. They are her blood and I am not. But DH knows that it is me, not her, that is his future. I have no problem with him spending time with her if he chooses to, but I have made the decision to spend minimal amount of time with her so that she doesn't have the opportunity to create the conflict that she wants to create. I do want to add that in his family's visit they have been nothing but nice and caring toward me. MIL pretty much ignores me, but that's ok because the feeling is mutual.

Thanks for reading...
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Old 03-27-2006, 11:58 AM   #74
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Hi all...

I think I might start to join you on this thread. I usually do okay during the week, absolutely no problem. I train, I eat well, enough for training and other things, then the weekend hits and either because I've been "good" all week or because I'm tired, or because I'm bored, or because I'm out in town and I don't take healthy food with me or we're out for a meal I tend to eat like there is no tomorrow.

Sometimes it's that there's a trigger food, like a peanut butter kitkat or pizza. But some times I can take them or leave them, or have just a small portion and be completely satisfied with that. I don't understand how sometimes I can eat one cookie, or one creme egg and be fine, then the next day it turns into a binge. I can even binge on apples and crackers!

I tried spreading my treats through the week and it worked to the extent that I didn't stuff my face too badly on the weekend - but I still ate beyond the overflowing tank position (food is fuel, eating when you're full is spilling petrol onto the garage forecourt floor!).

Yesterday was a bit strange on the old eating front. It always is when we go for a day away. We went to Brussles on the train, so we got up at 6am, had breakfast, then at 8am I got a huge bag of maltesers which we ate on the train. We also ate apples, cookies and granola bars. Then we got to Brussles and had a BIG bread and cheese feast! Oh and we had some more chocolate! Then later on in the day I had a HUGE piece of quiche with fries, then apple pie with custard and ice cream to finish it off. Oh I shared the pie On the train home we dug into a big bag of chips as I was reading Shape

So that's probably a typical weekend day! I was eating yesterday because I was tired, and because we were travelling and didn't have "proper" meals or meal times.

But today I'm sorted, and I know I will be for the rest of the week.. I just can't manage the weekends. Maybe that's cool, maybe I should start feeling like I just have to "diet" at weekends - the rest of the week is easy!

Expect to see me around here on a Monday!

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Old 03-27-2006, 10:17 PM   #75
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NOOO, I've binged the past three days. I'll spare everyone the despicible details. Out of control once again. There must be something in the water . . . Maybe end of the month blues . . . Ah, Spring is here though. Can't wait for my flowers to begin to bloom and wonderful weather to exercise in.

Girls, we need to join together and pull ourselves up and brush ourselves off.

I'm finished tonight. I'm going clothes shoppping tomorrow to spend the extra money I've stupidly been spending on junk food. I went browsing today and discovered I fit nicely into size 14's now! YAY!! I even managed a 11/12 but they were bigger than the 14's, so I think that was a factory error or misprint. It was a great fantasy though.

2frustrated, welcome to the thread!! Ah, how jealous am I that you get to live in Europe and take a few hours to visit other countries . . . How I miss Paris . . . Okay, what are maltesers? Are they the British version of Whoppers (malted milk balls)? I understand bingeing on fruit; I once ate 3 lbs of tangerines in one sitting. I ate 6 today, because they are out of season, and I have to peruse every grocery store in town to find decent ones! And I still got a couple dried ones, darn it!

Lucky13, you're MIL "incident" has intrigued me, and I the nosiest person in the world, but I'm also very courteous as well, so I won't ask . . . I'm not married so I only have to deal with my own mom and she's a plentiful handful. I'm still hanging on to my "fat" clothes (although I'm still in them), but I plan to sell mine on Ebay as a lot, because I think I could get more for them on there than I would at a garage sale.

dalai_lala, I have a problem with the last week of the month. I usually say, "Let me blow this week because I can start fresh on the 1st." But I'm with you. I'm back on plan tomorrow. I want to end March on a high note since it's been such a struggle. I should start the measurement taking and photos at ends of months too so I don't have the urge to lose control. I only have one pic of myself about 4 pounds ago, so there won't be much of a difference. I've got to find some of when I was over 300, although I'm not sure any exist. I know I trashed some of them. I would love to show everyone progress pics.

KristenElizabeth, I hope you restrained yourself!! I've worked with an autistic child before, I know how stressful and frustrating it can be. Stay strong!!

LeaLee

ellis, I hope you managed to get your thoughts off of food. I've been there countless times. I usually crack though and binge, because it's the only thing that gets my mind off of food. Ironic, huh?

Wide in Winnipeg Hey, I'm Polish, so I know the power that cabbage rolls can have over a person . . . Except we usually only have them around holiday time, so I don't have to face the temptation but a few times a year. I hope you got back on track today. Although that's what I said yesterday as well and I failed miserabley. I hoped you fared better.

ThinWithin225 I'm looking forward to the same visit, so that's why I think I'm having a hard time with control. Actually I know why. I always have the hardest time around the end of the month because of it. I wish it was warm enough to start walking again in KS. Our weather is freakish. We just had snow last week. I bet it's already warm in Georgia, isn't it?

eadavenp I think we all understand how food "talks" to us. It not only cries "EAT ME EAT ME," but you won't believe what else it does. It jumps up and down, chases after me, duct tapes me to the floor, forces my mouth open, and cha-cha's down my throat. It REALLY does. See, it isn't my fault at all. It really does have all the power. I'm defenseless, and what kind of person would I be if I maimed a poor cookie, even in self-defense?

Ahh, girls. I'm coming on here and doing this every night. At least my fingers are not putting things into my mouth. And my WPM is bound to improve.

I just want to thank everyone. This actually helps me and makes me feel better. You gals inspire me, you really do. You know I'm a bit strange anyway, but I love you all. You are all in my heart. I hope we can all heal some day.

Take care and much peace.
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