I read this line in a WW magazine in my break room at work. I've tried to use it a few times when potato chips (my absolute weakness) are around and it's worked a few times...
Instead of saying 'I can't eat potato chips' you should say 'I don't eat potato chips'
Since 'can't' implies it's forbidden, making it more appealing
Whatever works, right? "Don't" wouldn't work for me. (I've never been good with the idea of never again.) I prefer won't, as in "I won't eat those chips right now."
Whatever works, right? "Don't" wouldn't work for me. (I've never been good with the idea of never again.) I prefer won't, as in "I won't eat those chips right now."
F.
"Don't" doesn't really work for me either.... even though there are a lot of foods that I "don't" eat... and thankfully there aren't any foods that I "can't" eat (say, because of some sort of actual food allergy or underlying medical condition) so I like being in the camp of "I won't eat those chips right now."
And anyway... If I were to actually say "I don't eat chips" I would run the risk of being struck down by lightning since that would be a bald-faced lie...
I use both phrases. I can't eat pizza or anything greasy. They physically make me sick. I don't eat meat, as I choose not to. I understand what you are saying that "don't" is more empowering (as a choice) than "can't" as a limitation.
I agree with you, it works for me. When you say "don't" or say "i'm not the kind of person that eats this" it works for me; it makes me believe that I am in fact the type of person that doesn't eat junk food.
Doesn't work for me either, just because it feels untrue. If there is a food I love and am struggling with it, it would feel like a lie to say I don't eat that food. I may not eat it then, but that doesn't mean I don't eat it.
"I won't" is a good one that I hadn't thought of though. Feels true. And empowering.
"I don't (want to)" is also something I found useful when eating with other people. If you say "I can't eat (this or that", it tends to prompt questions, at least from some people, and rope you up into discussing losing weight, dieting, why can't you make an exception for today (yeah, and then tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow too...), etc. When you say "I don't want to eat pizza now", usually nobody bothers you.
As for "lying", I don't know... Would it be worse than when we lie to ourselves with all those nice "I'll start tomorrow" and "I'll never eat crips again after such a binge", for instance? ^^;
As for "lying", I don't know... Would it be worse than when we lie to ourselves with all those nice "I'll start tomorrow" and "I'll never eat crips again after such a binge", for instance? ^^;
But you guys have to realize that we HAVE To "lie" to ourselves for this to work. It is a such a common practice in psychology counseling too for confidence (which I've went through). You go in a mirror and tell yourself what you love about yourself. You tell yourself you are beautiful and some other things EVEN IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IT and you feel like it's a lie. becuase that's how our minds WORK - if you tell yourself something over and over, your mind will begin to believe it and SO WILL YOU! It's a matter of wanting to do it. This practice works. There is data to back it up. I even read about it in some health magazine, that they did a study and it worked.
It's not a matter of lying, it's a matter of CHANGING your mind to believe what you tell it. Unless of course, you don't actually WANT to change and you don't want to "become the person who doesn't eat that". That might be the issue here, now, huh?
I read somewhere (wish I could remember where) that our brains respond better to positive statements, so rather than saying. "I won't/don't/can't" do something, you should choose statements like "I WILL stay on plan/ I CAN resist this temptation.
I don't know whether it REALLY works or not- but I do like the idea of staying positive.
There are a few phrases I remember as being helpful and also somewhat funny like, say for chips, "I'm allergic to chips, I break out in fat" also if you don't want to "lie" you can say "Thanks, I've had enough" they don't have to know you mean you've had enough for a lifetime...lol
Sensualappeal reminded me of 12 step programs that tells you to "act as if" until your behavior changes. It's like telling yourself you can have something tomorrow to get you past the immediate craving, then maybe tomorrow you have it or don't have it, you sometimes need to trick yourself a little bit to get out of a situation that might throw you off your program.
I like the idea of saying I don't eat that, because for the time being I don't eat (at least i try not to) what's off my program.
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It's not a matter of lying, it's a matter of CHANGING your mind to believe what you tell it. Unless of course, you don't actually WANT to change and you don't want to "become the person who doesn't eat that". That might be the issue here, now, huh?
Actually I think we both meant the same thing but I probably worded it ambiguously, sorry. I meant that even if it feels like a lie ("I won't say I don't eat pizza because it's a lie, actually I do, I love pizza"), it doesn't matter, and it's no worse anyway than when we fool ourselves with thoughts such as "this is my last binge" or "just one more cookie and I'll stop".
Personnally, I don't care about "lying" to myself as long as it works. I lied to myself for years while suffering ED, so now I can well darn do it to be healthy, too. (And I also "lied" to myself to convince myself I loved fruit and veggies, and... it worked so well that people curse me now because I've also come to love fruit like durian. )
I personally love this. I'm not sure where I heard it first but it's so much easier to say, "I don't eat sweets" rather than "I can't eat sweets". People also don't ask as many questions when you say, "I don't eat that...". I read an article in Essence a few months back and Jada Pinkett said that she doesn't eat for pleasure. That really sparked something in me. It's a philosophy that I have successfully adopted for the last 4 months. I eat delicious foods that I enjoy but I eat them for sustenance and not pleasure. I have given up sugar which has made my physical cravings completely disappear even though when I see something that I used to eat I have pangs of wanting it.
Use 'don't' instead of 'can't'
but I probably worded it ambiguously, sorry. I meant that even if it feels like a lie ("I won't say I don't eat pizza because it's a lie, actually I do, I love pizza"), it doesn't matter, and it's no worse anyway than when we fool ourselves with thoughts such as "this is my last binge" or "just one more cookie and I'll stop".
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