Does anyone else get a really weird twinge of guilt when they eat on occasion, even if it's just a normal portion of a normal food? I ask this because I still believe that it's important to protect ourselves from ALL disordered eating mindsets on all ends of the spectrum.
It seems sometimes like I still have a "food is the enemy" mindset floating around in the back of my head, and it's hard to eradicate that because, whether we like it or not, not enough food or too much food makes us ill. You can't ever completely stop food... or thinking about it. Anyone care to discuss this?
I used to feel embarassed to go to a marble slab cremery and order an icecream, and then eat it there. I used to think that people were looking at me and thinking "see, that's why she's fat" I felt that way when I went out to eat everywhere, but mostly to the dessert places. It's a mental complex because I sometimes still feel that way.
The other day I went to Olive Garden by myself to treat myself on a good meal! So i ordered an appetizer, an entree', and dessert. I heard the overweight people say at the table next to me "Look, she has to be buliemic" Haha, if they only knew! I'm anything but! Sure that was the first splurge I've done since weight loss, and the last since, but the moral of the story is, society is so judgemental. Your either fat because you over eat, or you have an eating disorder when your thinner and caught actually eating. We can't please everyone. We really only need to please ourselves. And I do, and that's why I make the choices I do.
Yes, I still feel guilty when I eat cake, I still worry if I'll be able to maintain for the rest of my life, and I will always wonder if I'll ever fall off the wagon. But in the mean time, I'm going to enjoy my new body, I'm going to enjoy the food I want, I'm going to enjoy what makes me happy. Most importantly, I'm going to enjoy myself!
Food is a necessity to survive, but sometimes I find myself struggling to find the will power to control what food I eat. It used to be my main enemy, but I've had to befriend it in order to maintain my new lifestyle. I see it as, "keep your friends close, but your enemies closer" So i've learned all I can about foods that I can safely, happily eat!
I hope both of our guilt goes away one day. Sometimes I still see myself as the 250 Sam that was here just a year ago. Body dismorphia is CRAZY! But when I feel that way, i just compare my before and after photos. Then I snap out of it. We need to be reminded sometime.
Didn't mean to get on my soap box and just ramble!
I don't feel guilty about anything I eat, but certain foods trigger my binge eating disorder. So I don't feel bad about having a slice of pizza. But I can't stop at just one and I end up eating the whole pie. When I binge, I feel a lot of shame. So, for now, I don't eat pizza.
Actually, I feel more guilty when I eat something I don't want to eat. If I'm out with people, I feel like I have to prove that I'm normal. So, I'll have a bite of things I don't want to have. Like a sugary dessert. Or a couple bites of deep fried calamari. I feel like I am betraying myself when I don't eat foods that are healthy for me.
I am trying to expand my list of allowable foods so that I can learn to eat anything and not binge. It's hard, but I'm making progress. This week, I "legalized" sunflower seeds. Yay.
Guamvixen, thanks for sharing that story -- what an awesome perspective. This reallys helps to know that people are going to comment even when I become as beautiful as you are!!!
I have always felt shame in eating while obese. When I lost 120 pounds in the late 1980's, I found I STILL felt shame when eating in front of others, like they would view me as a pig, even if I ate a salad.
I have felt guilt with food in a shopping cart, feeling like I needed to pretend the binge foods were for a slumber party for the kids! I would imagine the conversation in my head, as though I was justifying it if asked. Of course no one asked. Still, I was ready with a lie and I felt guilty about that too!
I have always been a closet eater, I would never eat a second helping of cake in front of someone, but didn't hesitate to eat an entire cake by myself in secret.
I am better now. I eat what I want and in front of people, but still feel strong emotions about not overeating in front of them. Since I started this diet, I don't overeat anymore, but the guilt and shame do sometimes pop up in my head, even when there isn't anything provoking it.
Hello all,
I was always a thin person and only started having weight problems after my first pregnancy and when started aging. For me, the problem was backwards, I didn't accept the fact that I could not continue eating as a 15 year-old forever!!
Nowadays, and after working on not only on losing the excess weight but also getting in shape, I do feel a wave of guilt once in a while when eating something that should be off limits, last week for example, I took the kids to local pizza place, I loved pizza and hadn't had any for almost a year. My 13 year old ask me if I would have at least one slice, and I say "hey why not?". So I allowed myselft to enjoy that slice of pizza in the company of my kids!!!!
I think it's all about balance, right?
im in france right now and wind up binging on brie and bagettes. i try to justify it by saying, "you're in france! its ok!" but it really isn't. When i go to the bakery to get bread (which is how you buy bread in france), i usually get a couple of different types of loafs, mainly cuz i can't choose. I pretend i'm getting them for a family or group, not just me in my apartment eating two loaves of bread. i feel disgusting.
I definitely have "food guilt." Not all the time, but definitely more so if I eat something high calorie, or if I eat more than I feel I should.
Whereas people who have a problem with alcohol or cigarettes are able to totally AVOID their vices, unfortunately we cannot do that with food. It can make it hard. Not that I would want to never eat, but sometimes I feel like if it were not such a necessary thing, and I could just completely remove the temptation completely, that it would somehow be easier.
I feel like I sound anorexic in saying that. Actually I have more of a problem with over-eating though.
@JennyGirl, every time i compare overeating to alcoholism or drug abuse, i think the same thing - they just have to avoid forever, while we have to figure out how to incorporate food into our diets moderately. not that either one is easy, but it's kind of frustrating. although i'm obviously not anorexic either, sometimes i feel happy when i haven't eaten in a while/fast because i don't have to make the choices of eating healthy vs. badly.
I feel incredibly self conscious eating out, I've definitely improved with restaurant eating with people I'm close to though. I'm fairly capable of enjoying that.
But I don't recall the last time I ever ate a random snack when I was out/in college etc. It doesn't matter if it's really healthy or junk food, I just have the irrational fear people will be thinking 'She shouldn't be eating'.
But I'm sure that's more of a reflection of what I'm actually thinking about myself.
I don't tend to really eat any food that is really high calorie now (full fat ice cream etc), since it's a guaranteed trigger for bad eating habits with me. It can also make me incredibly anxious for a week or so after-It's just not worth it.
It makes me feel better knowing I am not the only one that feels this way. Sometimes I will feel really guilty right after I have eaten something I know I probably shouldn't have.
Food Guilt
