Pretty good couple of days for me OP, have not been as hungry the last few days and have not eaten my calorie limit each day. I'm not going to keep eating just because the calories are available. Weight down again today -1, finally back to what my ticker says. Have not read my cards for a couple of days, I think I need to rewrite some of them now. I have to get my last 115 minutes of exercise in this weekend. My weekend Zumba classes are done and that easily filled 60 minutes. My plan is to ride my bike to the library tomorrow to return a book, I purposely drove past it tonight so I have to go back and do it. The weather is not going to be great for it, high tomorrow is forecast for 6C (about 42F), guess getting to warm won't be an issue. Got signed up for my boot camp class, first confirmed one is Nov 9, I'm on a wait list for Nov 5 and hope that clears so I don't have to wait as long.
va1erie I was thinking about your question of how my headache came on so quickly after eating a good dinner. I'm trying to remember if it was building through the day or not, I did have one for most of last weekend so that might have been a factor. When I look back at my tracker for that day I didn't have my normal oatmeal, yogurt and fruit for breakfast and I think that threw off my whole day. It looks like I ate a lot of the wrong carbs and not enough protein, fruits and veggies and the only thing I wanted more of was those same things like bread and cereal. I've really tried this last 3 days to get back to the fruits and veggies and have felt much better.
pamatga Thanks for the idea to try skim milk when I'm feeling a headache. I know my blood sugar dips around 10:30am and am prepared with a snack for that time. If I try the milk first without the addition of cereal it might be all I need. Big credit to you for your list of Beck tasks.
gardenerjoy I found your posting on your goal weight to be very informative. When I was deciding mine I wanted to be realistic and know that to get to an acceptable weight for me it may not be really low. I debated on putting 145 instead of 150 and the reason for that is based on the first diets I was on in my teens and I'm 49 this year so I've had lots of years doing this. I remember weighing back then, before the digital age of scales, and watching them move the big weight across the scale and wishing it would be at 125 so they could then move the little one. I never wanted it to be put at 150 to start with. So in my head if I could get to 145 and stay there comfortably (I know this is a lifetime process), that big 150 pound weight would not factor into it. Of course this is totally psychological. Right now I am really excited at the prospect of getting into the 160's!
Julie, na3309 welcome to the group
BBE Credit for only eating 1/2 your dinner and having the use of 1/2 of a car. It surprises me on how dependent we become on having 2 cars at our convenience. I have to take my car in next Friday to get the winter tires put on and have planned out my Sat on how I will take the train to my boot camp class, walk from there to get my haircut and then take the train to pick up the car. All because I want to be sure DH has his truck available in case the kids need to be transported anywhere. And I'll get a lot of extra walking in, now let's hope it's not a yucky cold snowy day. But once I have those new winter tires at least then it won't matter!
4EverLearning Robin, I know how frustrating it can be losing a post, I have found it happening a lot lately, even when I type short ones. I'm not sure if it would work on your computer but I just right-click on mine to copy it, not paste it anywhere but at least it's saved if I do get kicked out. I tend to do that a few times while writing. Maybe worth a try for you? Big credit to you for coming here to post when you are so busy with life in general. My thoughts are with you as you deal with your medical issues.
maryann I love the cool class art project you did in your DS class.
beverlyjoy I find it very enlightening that you tell your stories without the need for all the modern technology gadgets!
Have a good weekend everyone. I need to go and buy some Halloween candy for Monday but think that may happen late on Sunday. And I'm pretty sure it will be some type that I don't like!
Well glad I copied all this as once again it kicked me out!!
Tazzy, I wouldn't have thought of just right-clicking to copy a post but I will definitely try that. YAY YOU for eating less than your calorie limit when not hungry, not to mention for planning to ride your bike to the library to return a book when you've already driven right past the library! I was also impressed by your previous post in which you talked about stopping yourself from unplanned eating so quickly and saying NO CHOICE, which I suspect just might be the two most powerful words in the English language!!
Pamatga, I'm impressed that you were a body-builder! To me that is about on a par with walking on the moon!! But I can certainly identify with those shoulder injuries. I loved what you said about how resolving your obsessive/compulsive issues frees up so much mental energy for more constructive pursuits. That is so true. I also really love your new advantages for losing weight--especially the one about knowing what it feels like spatially to move like a thin person (which has been such a revelation to me) and "healing and sealing that part of [yourself] that has been wounded and broken for a very long time." Amen to that. And I give you lots of credit for making such detailed and specific plans about what tasks you will work on. You appear to be really focused and committed to your recovery. Re: your plan to lose 10 pounds per month until November of next year--others have already questioned how realistic that goal may be, especially when you get close to your goal weight, and I definitely share that concern. But I would add another caution: don't focus exclusively on weight loss as a goal, because you can't always control how much weight you lose. What you CAN control is your behavior. So frame your goals in terms of healthy changes to your behaviors and mindset, and the weight will take care of itself! And finally, re: your confusion about Beck's admonition not to postpone your life "until you lose weight"--I think the fact that you can't identify with that tendency speaks volumes about your emotional health!
Val, I am impressed that you can do legitimate push-ups, since I can't even do the girlie kind very well! I hope your college visitations went well and that Jane is settling down a bit. That ED deadline of Dec. 15 will be here before you know it, and hopefully that will alleviate some of Jane's angst (and, by extension, yours).
Gardenerjoy, I love your attitude about food preparation (I would do well to emulate it). And I was intrigued by your comment about not having such a strong attachment to your weight if you measure it in kgs. I think that is very clever and smart!
Beverlyjoy, glad to hear that your stomachache is getting better and that your ghost stories went well. That sounds like fun!
fyreflie24, welcome! I smiled at your post about your Pandora bracelet, as I have a Brighton charm bracelet to which I added a new charm every time I lost 5 pounds! And, like you, I have met Judith Beck twice--once at the annual meeting of the American Psychological Association this past August, and then again at the Beck Institute earlier this month when Val and I attended her diet workshop there.
Julie, welcome to you, too! I LOL at your comment about the damage you could do in two additional weeks of not dieting, but I applaud your decision to follow Beck's advice to work on the critical tasks of her program prior to starting to diet.
I think there were other things I wanted to say, and did say in the long post that disappeared into thin air, but now I can't remember them all! Now let's hope I can post this before it disappears, too! (I did do the right click thing just in case!)
Good night, everyone.....and have a great OP day tomorrow!
Diet Coaches/Buddies - Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi. Picked up DW's car driving much better. I stopped by a supermarket on the way home to get my strawberries because of the threatened snow today. I was so pleased with myself last night when I left about a third of my dinner at the restaurant (CREDIT moi). Thought maybe I was improving in that arena, LOL. Then went to bed at 9pm and slept until 6:30am - an unprecedented long duration for me - wearing all the warm clothes currently available to me since I felt bone cold all over. Seems that I was sickly, not enlightened; Oh Well. I'm back in the grove this morning.
Joy (gardenerjoy) – Congrats to you, Pujols, and the rest of the Cardinals for a dynamite show last night and yet another World Series Victory. Aren't you getting tired of always winning?
Debbie (Lexxiss) – Kudos for choosing the CSA farm over Jeopardy. I know about those "have to do's" growing exponentially.
Beverlyjoy – Just love reading that you're back in the saddle telling your stories. I imagine it's an eye opener for them to hear you do it without an iPad prompter.
maryann - Love the thought of Cornhusk Dolls with those big, sophisticated 10 year olds. Kudos for moderating your calories after the cupcake frosting.
Robin (4EverLearning) - Sending supportive thoughts as you weigh your options - that's some tough decisions to think through and make. Given what you've written, I'm surprised that I don't read more often about prophylactic mastectomies.
And Ouch for that lost post. After I'd done that a few times, I copy-paste into somewhere - always typing into the 3FC editor to get the bold and underline. Word works for me now, but on Windows machines I've used Notepad just fine.
Donamari (fyreflie24) – There seems to be some credibility to the notion that asserting a virtue can lead us to exhibiting it. Keep on trucking.
Julie (na3309) – Kudos for taking seriously Beck's plan that your first two weeks are spent learning the skills without the distraction of trying to lose weight. My take is that the skills are essential for staying the path - and surprisingly difficult to acknowledge that we aren't already doing them.
Yep, you post here and we're your online Diet Coaches and you ours. There are a few regular poster who have real life Diet Coaches, but over the few year's I've been here, not many. Perhaps that's a silly statement; those with real life Diet Coaches don't post here - Duh!
Readers -
Quote:
chapter 4Stage 1The Success Skills Plan Success Skill 6Overcome Hunger, Cravings, and Emotional Eating experiment 2Prove to yourself that hunger isn't an emergency. what to do . . .
Phillip was surprised that even his worst hunger was only mildly uncomfortable and certainly tolerable. He was also very surprised to find that even when he was intensely hungry, he didn't stay hungry for a full hour. In fact, his periods of hunger usually lasted about only 10 to 15 minutes and then disappeared. They went away even more quickly when he got distracted.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Complete Beck Diet for Life (Green book), pg 79.
Last edited by BillBlueEyes; 10-29-2011 at 09:57 AM.
Sorry for being MIA while on the road! Just very busy. Report: didn't read my cards (forgot to take them), didn't weigh until this morning and was a little worried because of all the odd choices I had while traveling, but I'm at 111 which I think is where I was Wednesday when I weighed. Visited Dickinson Wednesday (Jane liked it a lot), had half a burger and about 1/4 of a beer at a local pub, then drove to Philly and dropped Jane off for her overnight at Haverford. Got some exercise as the dh and I walked to a little Chinese place (Chun Hing in Bala Cynwyd, I recommend it) 3/4 mile from the hotel. It had come highly recommended. I ordered shrimp in tomato sauce which I think probably had a lot more oil in it than I'd expected, but it was delicious. Skipped the rice, even skipped the fortune cookie, but I did eat a few of the little fried wonton-wrapper apps they'd brought gratis, should have just sent those back as soon as they appeared on the table. By the time we started walking back the temps had dropped 20 degrees and it was raining steadily, so we had a warmer (two actually) in the bar back at the hotel while watching game six of the World Series but skipped the bar snacks which were being steadily consumed in a stealthy way by a very overweight woman sitting next to me. Every time her companion got distracted or left the room, she'd scoop out and gobble down a handful. It made me very sad for her. Then yesterday I got zero exercise as we were in the car for 9 hours, breakfast in the hotel of scrambled egg whites and a piece of rye toast, skipped the potatoes, stopped for lunch at a fantastic little place called The Green Harvest in Bedford PA (highly recommend) where I ordered a sandwich that turned out to be much higher in probable calories than I'd expected. At half, had unsweetened tea, ate a couple sun chips for no reason other than the fact they were there and I hadn't expected them; I don't even LIKE sun chips. Stupid, but I moved on. Back late last night, ate the other half of the sandwich. So not an over-horrible eating few days, but I was expecting to be up a bit with the higher-than-normal-calories-choices and the not-weighing-daily, so I'm surprised I wasn't. One more overnight visit next weekend (Bowdoin, in Brunswick ME) and then I think we're done until at least January.
Debbie -- Your smoothie sounds intriguing! Is everything raw? Do you put this into a regular blender? (I'm wondering about the chunk of beet and ginger in my blender!)
Pam -- I never really got into the 'enriching your life' section of the book. I don't really know if I was putting things off until I lost weight -- I don't feel like I really did that. I walked less when I was heavier.
maryann -- yeesh, 3.5 hours is a long haul for music lessons! Good for you for agreeing to let your dh sleep elsewhere so you could get a good night's sleep. I don't think it's a sign of unhealthiness in the relationship. My dh and I sleep separately occasionally, usually for various reasons to do with one or the other of us getting a good night's sleep, and our relationship has always been very good. It was 22 years last month. I smiled at you cuddling your DS' teddy bear. Maybe it smells like him? The first year my daughter went to sleep away camp I slept with her pillow. Good for you for being kind to yourself while you're feeling stressed.
Donamari -- It's definitely worth it! So do you want to talk about which book you're working on and where you are in it?
Julie -- welcome! We'll be happy to be your coaches, and you can be ours. It's important to commit to posting every day. Wow, I'm so impressed that you quit dieting! I bet not many people who pick up Beck after they've already started dieting can say that! Hooray that you have time to turn your prediabetes around -- from the things you are saying, it sounds like Beck will have a lot of things that will ring true for you. Where exactly are you in which book? Give yourself lots of credit for not "doing a lot of damage" while you wait to start dieting but instead watching what and how you eat. That's a GREAT start, and a really sane way to approach losing weight.
BBE -- so true that we can enrich our lives without spending a lot. Running the farmers' market enriches my life.
gardenerjoy -- Wow, I LOVE the idea of less emotional attachment to the weight when it isn't in pounds! I may start doing that!
Robin - so glad to see you. Bummer on the post -- I hate that. Hm, on getting to being able to eat half a burger. How did I get to that place? I'm not actually sure. I've recognized for a long, long time that a "portion" simply =can't= be correct for both a very small woman AND a large man, and yet in restaurants we both get served the same amount. As I've aged I've thought even more about that -- the idea that a small 50-year-old woman needs even LESS than a large YOUNG man. And as you know I love to try new foods. So maybe it's just that I've had a lot of practice from probably the age of 17 of sitting there with my Tab and half a delicious-looking burger left on my plate but thinking, "There's no way I should eat the same as (whatever boyfriend who was then finishing off his burger, fries and shake and starting in on my leftovers.)" Wow, I'm so sorry you felt so anxious over the idea of the singles cruise! (No, don't worry, I know it's not my fault -- I just feel concern for you.) I can understand how that might raise a lot of old issues on any number of levels. Major credit to you for recognizing what was happening and stopping, even after you'd gone so far you probably felt as if you might not be able to stop. But you DID! YAY YOU! And yay you for recognizing THAT for what it is: NOW YOU KNOW YOU CAN! THAT'S almost worth the 3000 calories!
The ED deadline is actually Nov 15 (should hear back by Dec 15) and this coming weekend she's going to make her final decision on going ED to what she right now believes is her first choice school. And, yes, I can't wait, tho if she doesn't get in it'll be a pretty crappy wait for April!
Oh, ai yi yi on the followup. Okay, screenings are no big deal, but the Tamoxifen...I think you need to get a second opinion, and preferably from someone who HAS done prophylactic mastectomies.
Beverlyjoy -- Wow, your performances sound wonderful! Do you have any up on youtube or anything?
Tazzy -- Okay, so your headache was probably from eating incorrectly rather than being actually hungry? I just want you to recognize that, because your solution to this headache was to eat a slice of banana bread and a bowl of cereal. I'm wondering if you were having a sabotaging thought that a slice of banana bread and a bowl of cereal were going to cure the headache when really it was foods like those that probably caused it?
Tazzyerrific Idea to buy candy you don't like. It really helps so much in the struggle. A few of the gals on site Beverleyjoy, Gardenerjoy and Lexxiss taught me other good tricks like throw food away and put SOAP in it so I wouldn't pick it out of the trash or put salt in it or ,one that works surprisingly well, put it in a brown paper bag, stapled in the back of the frig. Robin: Ouch for the lost post. I like the idea of the Brighton bracelet. I love their stuff and it serves as a powerful tribute to your success. Valerie: Congrats on the weightloss and the awareness of eating pitfalls all around you. I must say I am jealous of your travels around the East Coast. I am California born and bred. It takes hours just to get to Nevada and hours to get from there to another state. My first real experience back East was this summer at Goddard in Vermont. I passed through about six states in about 3 hours. Terrific. I hope to explore more this next couple of years while I'm i n school. BBE: Sorry for the sick. It still counts leaving the extra food. I have often cleared a plate with a temp of 103!
Yesterday was a fine day. Did a little work, did some household business, took a nap. DS and I are on our own this weekend as DH tries to get the nuts in. I just want to enjoy down time with DS and putter. Weight 2 pound from ticker which is normal for TOM. I am sloppy with my food. I readily admit it. I am maintaining by adjusting calories to compensate for all the carbs I am eating and that means fruits and veggies are going out the window. I seem unwilling to stick to a food plan right now so I am taking a different approach. Five fruits and veggies today. Eat only!!!! sitting down. I have double exercise class planned to catch up on mins.
Have a good weekend.
Tazzy: I feel the exact same way! I don’t want to eat when I’m not hungry b/c that’s kinda how I got into this predicament to begin with! Good for you!
Bill: I was raised by depression babies so that whole concept of cleaning your plate was very ingrained into me as a kid, so kudos! I know how hard that can be, though I keep reminding myself how much I enjoy yummy left overs the next day!
I actually have a coach, my sister who is a cognitive therapist. She also has a ton of knowledge about health and nutrition as well so a great resource!
4Everlearning: Thank you for the reminder about non-weight/scale related goals. I’m SO bad about that!! My husband just bought me an out of this world, amazing bead for my bracelet... if that dang scale starts moving again! Oh wait, what did I just write about non-scale goals LOL. I’m originally from Philly, mIss the resource of Beck Institute.
Julie: Congrats on doing the upfront work!
Va1erie: OMG you’re making me so homesick LOL!
Pam: I need to look at that enriching your life part of the book. That’s me to a fault; postponing until I lose the weight. Very pertinent conversation!
My biggest roadblock here is dancing. I am a trained dancer and just despise the way I look trying to do even ballroom stuff at my current weight. I think I look ridiculous. But I love it, deeply. I started taking Zumba classes so that’s a step in the right direction, but that’s pain avoidance lol! I’d rather jump around like a dork than run cardio machines. Lots of work to do in this area.
Maryann: Credit is hard for me too; thanks for being an inspiration!
Va1erie asked where I was in the book etc so here’s a quick update. I’m on Day 13 of the pink book but I took a bit of a break. I wanted to digest to this far. I’m doing my cards (all programed into my phone so they’re always with me) and I have the workbook. I think I’m ready to start charging ahead again. I’ve been very motivated and staying on plan with either amazing or frustrating results. That’s me, all or nothing girl lol!!
Gm or afternoon...lol everyone, You are right my life doesn't need to stop just because I have gained weight. I have a lot of social anxiety thin or fat. I have read all the posts and I can identify with a lot of you. I think I may be emotionally eating. I think it is my way of hiding and making myself unattractive to others to avoid possible pain and rejection. I have hidden behind prescription drugs and alcohol for most of my adult life. That quit working a long time ago. I am now in recovery and have 2 1/2 yrs clean. I don't want food to be my new drug of choice. But it just may be becoming that whether I want it or not. That is why I'm so grateful to have found this website and beck. I have been married for 25 years but separated for 9. Talk about codependency! I want a better life for me, I want love, but I seem to do the very things that probably block it. Like isolating, getting fat etc...Time to make some real changes in my life. Even tho I don't do well with them I still try. My way is obviously not working for me. Just sharing this much about myself is a little bit uncomfortable.
So anyway, i still need to get the next chapter in beck done and I will get back with you then.
Oh and i'm still sitting and eating slowly. Its kinda hard to do. You would think that it would be easy! Giving myself credit!
Bye for now,
Julie b
Our travel was uneventful this morning although quite dark. Lots of exercise at work and ample opportunity for strengthening my resistance muscle. *credit* again for not one bite during an 8 hour shift. I can have a meal so today I brought a thinly sliced ham sandwich on rye bread home. I'll add RF swiss and grill it, make a nice salad and DH and I will split it. Easy and OP. Tomorrow will be cleaning at both mom's and our house as we prepare for the arrival of my sister.
Hi friends/coaches/beckies... yesterday went pretty well. My stomach is still not right. Today I am back to gingerale, crackers, toast & jelly, banana's & I did have some cheese for protein. Hopefully, it will calm down soon.
Friday night I fell asleep in the easy chair at 6:30 pm!!! I slept till about 2am. Later, I fell back to sleep about 4am. I was really tired.
Tomorrow morning my college roomate is stopping by while she is in town. We've been friends for 40 years..... kind of amazing. I get to see her once in a while when I visit my sister in California. I'll make some coffee, put out some fruit and bagels. I can have a half of a bagel for two starch exchanges..
Ack - I didn't use my word proscessor and lost the personals. I didn't follow my own advice of using my word processor. oh well... my fault for not using it.
Good night friends.
Last edited by Beverlyjoy; 10-29-2011 at 10:52 PM.
my report: weight was up .6 this morning (not sure why; didn't overeat at all), stayed OP, ate slowly and mindfully, made sure my kitty got a bite of everything, did not read my cards, did spontaneous but no planned exercise.
Julie, you will find lots of good company here! You are certainly not alone in your social anxiety; nor are you the first to use unhealthy and self-sabotaging strategies for coping with it.
fyreflie24, if you love dancing so deeply, DO IT!!! Just DO IT!! Be proud of being able to move your body in such a beautiful and expressive way. Honor yourself by doing what really makes you feel alive. Treating yourself well in that way can generalize to, and motivate, treating yourself well in other ways--and that can only help your dieting efforts!
Val, so basically you are saying that you figured out long ago that it didn't make sense for a small female to be eating the same portion sizes as a large male. That is just so darned RATIONAL!!! LOL!! We would all do well to be that rational!
Hope everyone has a lovely, relaxing OP Sunday. Mine will be more productive than relaxing, or at least it had better be--still have a bunch of projects to grade.
Yay for the Cardinals! That was quite a ride. Spontaneous exercise yesterday was jumping up and down. Snack calories went for a bit of bubbly! Credit for enjoying every sip!
WI: +0.3kgs, Exercise: +90 875/1000 minutes for October, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes
4EverLearning: That's a tough call, Robin. Good for you for working it out for yourself and deciding what risks make sense to you.
Diet Coaches/Buddies - Well, I'm not exactly back in the grove; I spent most of the day in bed avoiding the world, staying warm. Food was about at half plan - a sure sign that all's not right in this world.
We've got some snow out there now, but I've got power and don't see any tree limbs down. Wet snow on trees with leaves challenges the system.
Joy (gardenerjoy) – LOL at "Spontaneous exercise yesterday was jumping up and down" - I can well imagine. Kudos for getting in your 90 minutes of planned exercise.
Debbie (Lexxiss) – Continues to blow my mind that you've done another 8 hour shift without taking one single bite; Kudos, Kudos, Kudos.
Beverlyjoy – Ouch for some serious tired - I know about that. That's one lean diet you're describing.
Robin (4EverLearning) - Love your advice, "DO IT!!! Just DO IT!!" Can use this in several places myself.
Donamari (fyreflie24) – Ouch for the lost personals - that's a bummer. Yep, "either amazing or frustrating results" - it just doesn't go in a predictable straight line.
Julie (na3309) – Neat to so clearly see the overview of your life, yet to be so aware that this program is about small strategies, today, per, "still sitting and eating slowly." It's amazing how the small tasks build up to grand results.
Readers -
Quote:
chapter 4Stage 1The Success Skills Plan Success Skill 6Overcome Hunger, Cravings, and Emotional Eating experiment 2Prove to yourself that hunger isn't an emergency. what to do . . .
During the experiment, if you experience substantial discomfort, it's probably not from true physical hunger. Make sure you are rating your hunger discomfort and not your craving or negative emotions. For example, during the experiment or at other times, you may experience the discomfort of anxiety if you have such sabotaging thoughts as, Something bad will happen to me if I don't eat. You may feel tense and frustrated if you think, I can't believe I can't eat whenever I want to. It's important to recognize sabotaging thoughts such as these and to respond effectively to them. When you train yourself to think differently about hunger, you will actually feel proud of yourself for experiencing hunger and yet waiting for the next scheduled meal or snack.
Judith S. Beck, Ph.D., The Complete Beck Diet for Life (Green book), pg 79.
Julie: All the best! You've had a road and good for you for being honest with yourself by recognizing your areas for growth and doing something! It's not easy AT ALL!!
Robin: Remember the film When Harry Met Sally? "You're right, you're right , I KNOW you're right!". You are.
Bill: But I want a straight line! I FAST straight line! Wahh LOL! As my son's kindergarten teacher used to say, "it's nice to want things" LOL
Beverly: Have a great visit!
Debbie: great packing your lunch!
So my credit is that I went to a lovely restaurant with a friend last night for a beautiful dinner, was thrilled with what I hate and didn't gain weight! We had mussels and then a salad and I had a linguini with seafood and some wine. Was very sparse with daily calories and watched the pasta consumption. Had sorbet as desert... so a full happy meal that evidently worked! Yay me
Diet Coaches,
Up too early this morning - 4 am. Yesterday I ate five fruits and veggies but did not sit down and eat everything. I was, however, better. Weight the same. 105 mins of exercise, plan for the same today. DS is looking forward to Halloween. We will walk in the park today and read some.
Joy (gardenerjoy) – congrats on the baseball triumph. We had that kind of jubilation going on here in the Bay Area last year.
Debbie (Lexxiss) – congrats on your continued restraint at work. I know I tend to eat less at work because I am busy every minute.
Beverlyjoy – Cheer for seeing an old college friend. I see my buddies often and they are precious. They are my life's memory keeper.
Robin (4EverLearning) - good luck on the grading. It can sure be tiresome.
Donamari (fyreflie24) – How wonderful that you are a dancer. I was a swimmer , an ocean swimmer. I could swim out beyond the breakers and stay for hours. Then I stopped allowing myself to go to the beach when I got over 200 pounds. It took years of healing and work to realize - I just wasn't that important. Nobody thinks about me that much - a quick judgment, a quick sneer and then they are back thinking about themselves again. I was giving up something I love so dearly for nothing. You should dance!
Julie (na3309) – as you said in your post, this is your next step. There is freedom to be found here. It is scary and uncomfortable without food - just like it was scary an uncomfortable without mind altering substances but it is possible and it is wonderful to be at peace. Congrats on 2.5 years. I just took my 24 yr sobriety chip on Thursday. What do they say in the meetings "This program doesn't promise you get to heaven, it only promises to open up the gates of ****." That is true for me because food was my first and final addiction.
Got signed up for my boot camp class, first confirmed one is Nov 9, I'm on a wait list for Nov 5 and hope that clears so I don't have to wait as long.
Saturday - Waiting for the first snow
errific Idea to buy candy you don't like. It really helps so much in the struggle. A few of the gals on site Beverleyjoy, Gardenerjoy and Lexxiss taught me other good tricks like throw food away and put SOAP in it so I wouldn't pick it out of the trash or put salt in it or ,one that works surprisingly well, put it in a brown paper bag, stapled in the back of the frig.
