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Old 01-31-2016, 11:02 AM   #166  
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Good morning all. Just a fly by this morning as I need to get dressed and take Toby out for his morning romp and get me cleaned up and and and. I'm picking up my nephew and we're driving up to look at another town that I'm considering. It will probably be at least a year before I would even try to move, but I'm trying to cruise the towns and determine if it's some place I'd like to live.

Hope everyone has a great day and tomorrow will be a fly by as well -- have to run into town to get a bone density scan done. So, Tuesday I'll be back to my old wordy self.
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Old 01-31-2016, 11:20 AM   #167  
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Hello everybody,
So I am still in a bit of a funk but am making myself post and know I will feel better afterwards....you don't even have to read it......I just have to type it!
Had a meltdown at church today. You know how it is when people come up and say " Are you OK???" and that's it.......tears and snot all over the place! I have made a new friend though. She is a curvy lady who has a boy the same age as Sam and has only just started to go to our church. Well bless her I was blubbering about the ever present mould and she offered to lend me a dehumidifier until I can afford to buy one....blow me down if she didn't turn up with it this afternoon. Isn't that kind? I am so rubbish at asking for help....I hate feeling like a " charity case" even if nobody else makes me feel like that...it is all in my head! I am so used to being in charge...in my work especially...that the vulnerability that comes from being unwell is almost unbearable at times.
I am aiming to swim tomorrow and carry on with the gentle dog walks if I can....will keep you posted. Thanks for being there everybody.....I really appreciate it.
Donna
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Old 01-31-2016, 05:19 PM   #168  
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Good Afternoon all,

Sam- Glad to hear you had a good time at the baby shower. Trust me when i say "wait" on the baby thing. I had my baby girl when i was 23. I so wished i had waited till i was older and more together and free of the excess weight. I was close to 270 when i got pregnent and ended up over 300 pounds after having her. It was a traumatic, difficult experience due to complications. I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy and..i looked HUGE. I didnt enjoy it like i wanted to. My dh and I were wanting to try again now but put it off because i realized that if i had gotten pregnent even at this weight, i dont think i would enjoy my pregnency being plus sized. I want to fit in pretty preggo clothes and not have it be so hard on my body in carrying the pregnency.

Tootsie- I hear ya. This journey of weight loss can be depressing. It was hard for me for a lng time cause my dh would sabatoge my efforts. He would bring home junk food or cheer me up with a treat. One day i sat down with him and said " i cant do this weight loss thing without you. Its like trying to swim up a river when you keep doing this. This is beyond a vanty thing..its a health thing. I want to live the rest of my life with you but wont be able to if i dont lose some weight". It was a hard conversation to have. However he finally realized that it was true and since then, has changed. He only buys me treats that are diet approved and he denies himself what he loves to eat in order to see me succeed. I hope that your dh will understand one day too. Its hard though when he deals with depression too. Our coping skills go sideways.

Mountain- Yah i felt like that today at church too. Today i was questioning why i bother coming. Today just felt like one of those depressing days where i would rather hide than admit im not happy to anyone.

Betsy- Glad you have spring your step! At least we have someone here who is having a positive day today!
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Old 01-31-2016, 05:30 PM   #169  
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Well Good Afternoon All,

Last nights Birthday party was fun. They served foods i couldnt eat like bread, corn, stuffing ect, so i brought my salad to eat. I am glad i did. You know, the nice thing is, i dont think anyone cares what i eat. I think that the fact that you are eating, is all that counts. People like to eat together! Yes, the food fight was epic. Me and my dh were covered in colorful mashed potatoes, cream of wheat and whip cream. It was tons of fun. Cant say i had this much fun in a long time. The only downside was my gluten issue. My body doesnt like wheat or gluten and i got covered in cream of wheat and i ended up being itchy the whole night all over my body. No rash or anything..just itchy itchy itchy. So im going to go slather myself in coconut oil after i shave my legs.

To be honest, today was a depressing day. The more i swim, the more i want to swim, the harder it is on me when i dont swim. It becomes my lifeline. So..i come to church in the morning which starts at 10:30 am and the service goes till 12:30. I sit there watching the clock tick by, thinking out how i want the service to end now so that i can go for my swim which is only available from 12-1pm. Sure enough, church finishes lae and i miss my swim and then i become depressed about missing it and how i just want to go now but i cant...sigh..

Anywho.. today ive set myelf a new challenge. The challenge is to convert daikon radish into french fries. Im looking a little hopelessly at my daikon saying "i dont know if its possible you can fill that fry void in my life but i will try". Ive got a gluten free low carb chicken strip recipe and low carb sugar free sweet n sour sauce recipe..now i just want those fries!!

Will let you know later whether it worked out.. Anyway.toodaloo
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Old 02-01-2016, 06:52 AM   #170  
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I'm not doing very well. I'm still waking up at 5 AM, still suffering from depression pain. And Bob is so touchy, he wounds me two or threee times a day.
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Old 02-01-2016, 08:22 AM   #171  
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Hi everybody,
Apparently today is the day that people are most likely to ring in sick to work even though they just want a duvet day. Reading most of the posts....we all seem to be struggling at the moment. The issues are varied but we are all struggling none-the-less. If we lived in the same village we would get together over coffee and cry and moan at each other and we know that we would always feel better afterwards.
I sometimes worry that the friends I have in the real world dread asking " How are you?" because my chest is perpetually blinking awful and my mental health has wobbled significantly lately too.
Fi.....I can't imagine your pain and distress at having Bob add to your suffering but I do know that doing it alone isn't easy either. Over here there are chronic pain programmes that help families cope with that type of thing. Thinking healing and calming thoughts for your my lovely.
Porthardygurl.....yes it is still raining here...although we did have a couple of hours on Saturday where the sun shone and I pegged washing on the line...then we had hailstones!! I know what it is to sit in church and feel totally apart from everything. Our pastor is an absolutely amazing preacher and time always flies but on the odd occasion we have the junior pastor...well he waffles on and on...and repeats himself and so I sit mentally writing a shopping list! Two weeks out of 4 I am in the worship band...singing.....so the other 2 weeks it is nice to sit back and enjoy.
Betsy.....prepared to be grossed out. I let the cat sleep in with the dogs the other day and he sprayed ( he needs to be neutered!) so all the dogs have a hint of cat pee about them. I just haven't felt up to showering them all !!!

Well today was Welsh Class and then later debating club and swimming. They have changed the pool opening times which means we will have to hang around for half an hour....which is a bit of a pain as it is so tempting to slink off home! Especially when the weather is pants!!
I am aiming for swimming twice this week and 4 dog walks which I can easily fit in to my schedule....it's a start!
Hang in there chickens and please keep posting.
Donna
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Old 02-01-2016, 10:21 AM   #172  
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Wow. It's February already. Ended the month at the same weight as the beginning of the month, but at least I've stopped that slow creeping upwards. Now to get my mojo working.......mojo on a senior is not always a pretty thing to view.

Ubee -- Still stringing those days together?

Sam -- So glad you enjoyed your baby shower. I think the next thing you will inspire us to do is to be more social.

Fi -- Hope that today goes better for both you and Bob. Maybe it's time for a heart-to-heart with Bob to tell him how what he says affects you and listen to how your health issues are affecting him.

Porthardygurl -- I always appreciate it when people who have special dietary needs (whether it's for medical or personal dietary reasons) just bring their own food. I've had a couple who have provide me with a menu and expected me to in essence prepare a second and separate meal just for her (it always seems to be a her......). I did it once, but the second time I just told her that she should feel free to bring her food with her. She did and even admitted that her mother had bawled her out for sending any hostess a menu with her eating "needs." I put the needs in parentheses because they weren't for medical or weight loss reasons -- she's just an extremely picky eater. Anyway, glad you enjoyed the party. The food fight sounds like I would have enjoyed it about 40 years ago when I was your age. Now, probably would have enjoyed watching from the sidelines.

Donna -- Did we get separated at birth and are really twins? Asking for help is almost impossible for me -- too much pride (which cometh before the fall!). Yet I'm the first one there trying to help others. It sounds as though you've met a wonderful new person at church -- so happy for you. Hope you're able to get those swims in and keep up the walking as exercise seems to lift our spirits. On a side note, I love the way you phrase your sentences. Just differences in how English is used in our countries, but I find your speech patterns charming. I have to admit that I'm somewhat chuckling over the cat and dogs -- oh my.

Nice day yesterday with getting to see my older nephew and family. I took everyone out to lunch, sat between the younger boys and we solved all of the world's problems (they're much easier to solve when you're 8 and 5 since they revolve around what the other brother did or didn't do), and then went to look at the latest town on my list of possible places to live. I won't be living there! I got home and Bill had gotten home. He'd gone hunting and just forgot to tell me. For the newer chicks, Bill is my brother-in-law which I type in as BIL. Ubee thought I was referring to some guy named Bill and just didn't know how to spell his name or else he was really spectacular since I always capitalized the letters. Anyway, he lives across the street from me and was gone for 5 days and forgot to tell me he was going hunting. He swears he did (and maybe he did), but I'm just glad that he's home safe and sound.

I have to run into town this morning for a bone density scan and then will go to Costco for a few supplies. Then home to work on the photo albums some more. Nothing too exciting, but it will keep me busy. Have a good day all.
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Old 02-01-2016, 12:45 PM   #173  
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STOP! Please join us in the February 2016 Chat Thread.
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