[ruby2sday]

No pun intended!

For the last few years I've been working for my husband's business from home. I got to my highest weight ever, and started working on losing it. I've lost some, but am not anywhere close to where I would like to be, but hey, every little bit helps.

I am in the process of looking for a job outside of the home, as a second income would definitely help out right now.

I am feeling so self conscious and weird about this whole thing! The last time I worked in an office, I was a size 12 and felt comfortable around other people and in a work environment. I currently wear a size 22 and feel so sick with myself and hate looking in the mirror. Not sure how I am going to face co-workers!

I want to work because we can use the money, and also I actually think it would be good for me .. just concerned about being so heavy.

I know that lots of overweight people work and manage. Am I just being silly about this and the fear of being judged? How do you all do it that work? Does it bother you at all?

I think I am just stressing more than I need to about this. I don't know!

I would love to hear anyone's thoughts on this.

[sakurasky]

I'm in the same situation you are. Looking for a job and being terrified.
I'm a student, and I want to get a job for the summer so I can start saving some cash again, but the thought of how potential employers and co-workers will look at my weight really to be honest scares the crap out of me, so I don't think it's that odd at all.

I guess it depends on how big the company is, really. In huge companies, like the call center I used to work for, I didn't really care, and there were a lot of people around my weight range, so whatever. On the other hand, if it's a small environment that's prone to gossip, I'm afraid my weight and I will be a prime target for gossip.

The only "advice" I can think of to give myself (and you) would be to just suck it up. I mean there's no way you can really avoid what other people think or say about you, so we just gotta ignore that and do what's going to benefit ourselves (like making money). :P

Also, let's just focus on our personality. People give a lot more respect to big women with great personalities than shy big women who come off as "stuck-up" simply because they're too self-conscious to really talk to anyone and come out of their shell.

A long time ago, I worked at a place for about 3 years where, on more than one occassion, a friend/co-worker would say to me "You know, when I first met you, I thought you LOOKED mean/stuck-up/too serious. It wasn't until I really got to know you that I thought you were cool." And the thing is, I wasn't that kind of person, I was just shy and self-conscious and kept to myself hoping not to be noticed. But that's the thing, you will be noticed no matter what, so just remember to give an impression of who you really are, not your fears that cover that personality up.

[ruby2sday]

Thanks so much sakura! Good to know I'm not alone in feeling like this.

You are absolutely right .. there is always going to be someone that will think and say things. I need to just go and do this and not focus on that.

Thanks for sharing! It helps a lot

[AmyMW]

Something to remember... in most offices, the sedintary life takes precidence. I know where I work, I would say a fair majority are overweight and some obese. Even at my highest weight I never feel like eyes are watching me. You deserve to be there as much as everyone else. If you hold your head high and know your own abilities you will be amazed at how the rest of the office will respond. People come to me often for my help, because I am good at what I do... weight has never been an issue. I actually met my best friend at work (and she is one of those skinney work out all the time people). Go for, just know you are worth it and it will come through to others as well. There is a stigma, we all know it, we have lived it for a long time, but your attitude can trump it just believe in yourself!

[ruby2sday]

Thanks Amy!

You ladies are the best!

I really know it's true what you are saying. I do feel better.

[neonwildflower]

I literally stumbled into a hiring fair for Starbucks, that's how I got hired. I know it's not some prestigious job or anything, but it was something I'd wanted to do for a long time (I LOVE Starbucks! Have for years!!!) and I'd been too scared to apply. Even when my two interviews at the hiring fair went amazingly well, and the second interviewer said I as good as had a job he just needed to work out which store I would work at, I felt like I wasn't going to fit in there. There's this "image" of a Starbucks barista (or so I thought) and I was sure I wasn't it. However, nowhere along the line did anyone treat me as anything other than a confident, well spoken, Starbucks addicted university student. That welcoming, non-judgemental atmosphere is what kind of made me go "hm, seems like all these reservations were in my head!" I still feel like I stick out like a sore thumb sometimes, but I know I'm the only one at work who feels that way. The biggest obstacle to overcome when it comes to feeling like I fit in is myself, and I'm sure you can relate to that feeling too! It's not easy, but you just need to keep telling yourself that you DO belong there (wherever "there" may be) or you wouldn't have been hired! You'll do great

[sakurasky]

I used to work at Starbucks... when I was like 100 lbs lighter. It was the most fun job I ever had! I've always wanted to go back, but yeah, I have a fear that I was too fat for the "barista image". So thanks for the confidence boost neon! Maybe I'll apply after all. I mean, I CAN whip up a mean cappuccino.

[ruby2sday]

Thanks for sharing neon! Good for you for going for it. And I'm totally envious ... I love Starbucks!

I've really been letting my weight stop me from lots of things, and I know it's silly. People will think what they like and judge me if they choose, but I think it's probably worse in my own head than reality.

And in the end, so what? I can ignore them and go ahead and work because it helps out, and because I want to!

I'm so glad for all of you that have posted your stories. It's really helping me so much!

[Vortex_VVV]

I teach college, and there was a time (long ago) when I felt worried about standing in front of a bunch of 18-22 year olds all the time. They're not exactly the most forgiving group. I find that if I just focus on what I'm doing--in this and other situations--they do too.

Strangely enough, in fact, although many of my (thin) colleagues get comments about their appearance on course evaluations, I never do. DH used to get flack about wearing his belt buckle on the side, which many students found "really distracting"--another friend was told he should never wear black since it makes his head look disembodied against the blackboard; my DF who is built like a supermodel gets comments all the time that she needs to watch "What Not to Wear." But no one has ever told me to lose weight--at least not on course evals. I think setting a tone and expectation that my focus is on the work in front of us helps them keep the focus in the same place. But maybe I'm fooling myself, I dunno.