Thank you everyone for your support. I have gotten back to weighing myself most days. I am thisclose to wanting to buy some biscuits, but, they are too carby and I should just avoid them, sigh.

I still have the problem where if I get too full, I get sick, even though this kind of full is nothing like the amount of food I used to be able to pack in, ya know? So, I have to eat much smaller meals now. I just need to eat healthier smaller meals that snack-like stuff.

I need to lose more weight now because I gained like 10lbs in the past month or so, and I need to be below a certain weight before the holidays.

Been fighting the blues, so I am working on that as, when the blues are gone, then I have more energy to exercise, etc. I do notice that I am taking longer walks and getting around a bit better than before. Only a few people at my job noticed my weight loss, but, since some of the people there already look down on me for being fat, they are the ones who notice these things the least. Oh well.

I am just trying to keep my chin up and not get discouraged. The guy I was dating is ok, but, he doesn't seem interested, which makes me not interested, so, we only talk very rarely. It doesn't seem like we are progressing towards being in a relationship or even really dating for that matter. Oh well, maybe it would be better to just be friends.

I did ask the ex if he ever wanted to get together for coffee as friends, and he said maybe. Sigh. I don't want us to be in a relationship, because we aren't a good fit, but I do care for him as a friend. But, you can't force someone to be your friend if they don't want to.

I am getting older and I realize that it is better than not being here, and I am also trying to fight being sad about not being where I want to be in life. I have started to try and not focus on things that may upset me---like the 20 year old with the bmw who looks down at for having a non-glamorous car. Sigh. Who knows? Maybe a few years from now i will fall in love like never before, and make a ton of babies and be a stay at home mom and just be the kind of normal lady I want to be.

Nice to have you back

on your weight loss!

Thanks everyone. I greatly appreciate your support.

I have been up and down lately and trying to manage not overeating, and watching the amount of sugar I eat, etc. Some days I feel great, other days I feel kind of sad. Sigh. It is good to come here and express my thoughts and get other people's perspective.