Going out with heavy friends...help! - Page 2 - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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Old 10-04-2011, 05:15 PM   #16  
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I didn't think she was a horrible person. My former friend is one of the sweetest people I know, it's just self-esteem issues have the tendency to bring out the worst in people.

I also like what Jay says - eating slower can cause the illusion of eating more than you are.
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Old 10-04-2011, 05:32 PM   #17  
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I like the suggestion of making food and treats for both of you to eat, and especially the ones about not making a big deal out of it. Just do what you would normally do with her, see how/if/and in what manner things unfold, and roll with it.

But ultimately, no matter how sensitive you are trying to be for her, you have to stay true to you and what you've committed to. No matter what happens.
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Old 10-04-2011, 07:14 PM   #18  
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I hope everything goes smoothly and I agree with what a lot of others have posted. Be sensitive to her needs, not talk about it a lot, etc.

I've been on both sides of this (although I'd never dream of cutting off a friendship if someone lost a lot of weight!) and I found the easiest situations are where you let the other person (the person who hasn't lost the weight) bring up the conversation of weight. Otherwise just enjoy the time with your friend as much as possible.

I think offering to cook a meal or two is a great one! You can definitely pass it off as helping out and I'm sure she'll appreciate the break. I normally tell people I'm fussy about breakfast (I eat the same thing EVEY single day! ) so I always use that as an excuse to cook for myself too (and others if they'll eat it). I'd also encourage eating out more because you'll have a wider selection of foods so you're more likely to find something healthy (and like mentioned above play the food up as being something you're into right now vs. something you have to eat). for instance, I went out for lunch at work today and they have a dessert buffet. I found myself raving about these cinnamon pears they had there (for only 15 calories each!), it makes me feel better about what I'm eating too.
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Old 10-04-2011, 08:46 PM   #19  
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Man, that sucks... really doesnt sound like a very fun person to hang with...

I cant believe im going to say this... but if it is a situation that you know will get out of hand if you tell her about your dieting... Lie. Tell her that you have had to take some medicine for a medical condition and it has made you not very hungry.. or maybe you can develop a certain allergy or something...

I am not saying that it is okay to lie to your friends... but I am saying that sometimes it is easier to just say something like that than it would be to deal with the truth. Especially if you are staying with this person and you cant escape it.

I have a family member who can be pretty hurtful... When i first started dieting they would almost make fun of me for it (not in a point and laugh kind of way but more of just a pointing things out that didnt need to be pointed out kind of way) And I never even said I was on a diet! They just noticed my portion control and everything. For me, it really was a medical issue. If I didnt lose weight I was going to get much sicker. I just ignored it and then the next time i saw them and they pointed out how much weight i had lost i said "yeah, I got really sick and my doctors put me on meds and this was a side effect!" for some reason they never have mentioned it again... Yes, it was part lie... part truth... but it ended the comments and that mattered to me.
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