You know, as a woman it just irritates me to no end when women engage in catty behavior that completely plays into the stereotype of "*****y jealous petty women can't get along in the workplace." Ugh.
I agree with most of these ladies, you definitely are being targeted by this woman, and she is completely out of line with these comments. I've had comments made to me before at work and I've found great success with a little humor (granted, you'll have to fake it), something like "Oh, Jill, you're so goofy. I'm just not going to talk to you about anything but work until you're supportive. Weight Watchers would call you a saboteur!" And then roll your eyes, laugh, wave her off, and walk away. Next time she comes up, cheerfully smile and say, "Now what'd I tell you? I'm not talking to you about anything except work!" Then walk off or shoo her away. You're getting your point across, nicely, you're not letting her respond, and you're controlling the situation. Most of all, there is NOTHING you are doing that could be called misconduct or harassment. And if you do it in front of other people, she'll be self conscious and maybe censor herself a little bit more. But do NOT sink to her level with catty comments back, as difficult as it may be.
And Kudos to you for not clobbering her upside the head with a 3-hole punch!
Being polite and professional is always the best option, but if she keeps pestering and probing you can try drowning her in compliments. Not sarcastic ones, but the kind that will really throw her for a loop and give her the attention she's apparently craving. She makes a comment about being able to breathe in jeans? "Yes, I'm so excited to be wearing these after all this time. But they're only size 12. You must be, what, a six? You're so petite!" Brings in pizza and shoves a slice in your face? "It's really generous of you to do this for all of us, but I can't. We don't all have great metabolisms like yours." Makes a nasty comment to your bf? "Oh, don't worry. He watches me at night, and you watch me during the day...it's so great to have everyone supporting me. If I'm lucky I'll be as small as you in no time!"
She probably won't keep being nasty after you're so nice, but if she does (a) she'll look like a complete jerk to everyone in the vicinity and (b) the documentation of what you said vs. what she said will be that much more potent.
You know, I really love people like that. It really gives me some appreciation for myself to hear about people like that.
When I encounter someone like that, I honestly feel pity. I think of how horrible this person must feel to NEED to be such a jerk. I encounter this kind of stuff daily teaching 8th graders. Sometimes people feel so bad about themselves that they just need to take it out on an innocent bystander. When you think about it in that sense, I think it makes it much easier to deal with people like that.
Anytime she's getting ready to indulge in something extra tasty, I'm sure it would feel good for you to walk by and say, "Man that looks delicious! Enjoy!" and just get back to work. You'll know she's busy packing on the pounds, while you're melting them away.
Wow thanks for all the advice. I will say something to my boss once she gets back from vacation. not simply for her catty comments, but for her poor work ethic as well. I haven't been indulging her lately (past two days) but today she was talking about putting her two weeks in because she felt everyone ganged up on her and hates her. (ha!)
And the next time she says something, I'm just going to kill her with some kindness. Let's see how she handles that!
I will say something to my boss once she gets back from vacation. not simply for her catty comments, but for her poor work ethic as well.
I highly suggest you don't say anything to the boss about her work ethic, unless asked directly by the boss. Unless you are responsible for training her, or are her supervisor, it's not your place and it may appear that you are trying to be vindictive.
Last edited by recidivist; 02-24-2009 at 12:11 AM.
I agree with recidivist on that point- it's not your job to notice if people aren't doing their work or doing it properly.
I had a job once where the supervisor flat out told me to tell her if people aren't doing something- and I did what she asked and then she had the nerve to say "yeah that's my job to know, you don't need to tell me."
After that I was like okay that's your game (she hated me and was just trying to get rid of me)- after that I didn't say a word to her or anyone else for that matter and when I found my new job I was out of there.
Hopefully she leaves and the problem will be over.
I will say something to my boss once she gets back from vacation. not simply for her catty comments, but for her poor work ethic as well. I haven't been indulging her lately (past two days) but today she was talking about putting her two weeks in because she felt everyone ganged up on her and hates her. (ha!) 
