[KLK]

Now that you're older, have you ever talked to you dad about how his well-intentioned bullying made you feel as a kid?

My father (and mother) are both heavy, so theres no room for them to talk to me about how fat and gross I was/am.

Personally, (not related to your story, just generally), I'm SO SICK of how meek and apologetic heavyset people are supposed to be -- I was obviously unhappy at 264lbs and I'd still like to lose weight, and being obese is a health risk, etc. but I really don't think anyone should just quietly accept bullying, from anyone, ever. I've seen other shows about similar topics, and the whole show was full of these @sshole guys who call their wives fat and disgusting and the crying wives saying things like, "I KNOW I have to lose weight! But it's hard! I have to lose weight!!!" instead of saying, "Listen bro, I'm your wife and I demand your respect -- give it to me, treat me like a human being, or good bye. Go find someone more up to your standards." (Yes, i would break up with someone for chronic disrespect and bullying).

Originally Posted by SephyFowl

Wow great insight KLK. I do believe that is true. I can remember my Dad saying somethings like, "Look at what you are doing to yourself, you are eating yourself to death", or "You know you need your ankles taped because the weight on them while you are tumbling and pounding on them is too much for them to handle". That was all when I was like 160 and wearing a size 12/14. As a teenager I hated it, thought he was the worst man alive for commenting on my weight. lol Now I see that those comments were meant to help me and shock me into reality. I would never ever allow anyone to talk to me about my weight using name calling and abuse..

[SephyFowl]

Originally Posted by KLK

Now that you're older, have you ever talked to you dad about how his well-intentioned bullying made you feel as a kid?

My father (and mother) are both heavy, so theres no room for them to talk to me about how fat and gross I was/am.

Personally, (not related to your story, just generally), I'm SO SICK of how meek and apologetic heavyset people are supposed to be -- I was obviously unhappy at 264lbs and I'd still like to lose weight, and being obese is a health risk, etc. but I really don't think anyone should just quietly accept bullying, from anyone, ever. I've seen other shows about similar topics, and the whole show was full of these @sshole guys who call their wives fat and disgusting and the crying wives saying things like, "I KNOW I have to lose weight! But it's hard! I have to lose weight!!!" instead of saying, "Listen bro, I'm your wife and I demand your respect -- give it to me, treat me like a human being, or good bye. Go find someone more up to your standards." (Yes, i would break up with someone for chronic disrespect and bullying).

Yes I would break up with someone for chronic disrespect and bullying as well. I don't do well with that or the whole passive agressive approach either. My ex hub (I'm still on good terms with him) tried once to approach it like that, saying that I love you the way you are I really do, but you should lose a few pounds. I actually laughed at him and was like if you have something to say just say it. No hinting no bull just say it and he said well I think you should lose weight you gained a lot this year. I gave him the stank eye and told him that if he wanted to find someone that was skinnier he could and I would find someone who appreciated me the way I was. He never mentioned it again after that. lol

I have talked to my Dad about it and in no way did I think he was trying to be mean. I think with our families health risks and him having a 4-way bypass at age 41, he wanted me to know it wasn't healthy just went around it in a bad way. I told him you don't know how much your words just hit hard and in my teenage mind it seemed like you wouldn't love me if I got heavier. We talked it out and he apologized and has been nothing but supportive now. I am really happy about it too because he compliments me when he sees how much I've lost since I don't see him that often. It's good. I'm glad we talked about it and worked through it.