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Old 08-16-2002, 09:30 PM   #16  
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Love the question! I don't think as a kid I was fat but I was the tall kid, the tomboy. I was a size 10/12 in H.S. but was always told I was too fat and grilled on what I ate since I was in the 3rd. grade. I look back now at all the damage and am able to just now comprehend it all. I didn't get into plus size till college. I know I gained the weight because when I was in college my parents couldn't grill me on what I ate so I ate everything bad. Just like I did as a kid when I would sneak food. The problem was I did this at all meals and that's how I got to be a size 22. I still struggle that I'm an adult and I don't need to eat crap when I think nooone is watching. So I guess after all this rambling I was the kid who was told I was fat but I didn't feel fat till I truly was fat (227 lbs)
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Old 08-19-2002, 12:02 PM   #17  
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This is my favorite quote now (thanks to anagram)

"Isn't it strange how a number that felt so bad on the way up can feel so good on the way down?"

It's amazing how capable we are of self-loathing and how much it aids in the cycle of gaining weight. I hated myself right up to 274lbs.
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Old 08-19-2002, 01:44 PM   #18  
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I never considered myself fat until right around when I got pregnant. Even when I weighed my largest, I never looked as big as others who weighed less. I am tall 5'9" and pretty big boned so I could hide the weight some. In high school and college, I was always surrounded by petite people making me feel self conscious about my size, but not simply because of my weight. I weighed a total of 175 when I graduated from high school and 190 in college, but ballooned after my kids. I would love to be back in the 190 level again, but according to the charts that is still overweight!
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Old 08-19-2002, 05:40 PM   #19  
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This really is a good question. I fit into the always been fat, but like the majority of the other postees, what we considered "fat" in high school was more like--could stand to lose a few pounds.
My senior year I got down to 175 and wore some 14's and mostly 16's. I gained the freshman 50+ my first year of college and started my sophomore year at 236 (and I was active in college, playing most intramural sports.) After that I maintained 215-225 until I quit my standup job for a nice comfy office chair in 1997. Then I ballooned out and never saw it coming until I had to weigh at the doc's office. Up to 256. I made them reweigh me 3 times before I would believe it. I've topped the scales so far at around 304.
I never reallly saw myself as fat. Even when I weighed 256 I still saw myself as very beautiful with some weight to lose--most that know me will tell you there's no way I weigh 292 now--until I saw a pic of me in 1999 and I was HUGE...I had no clue where my slightly overweight person went to. I've always had a great self esteem and I think that's what's kept me from feeling sorry for myself.
Just my 2 cents.
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Old 08-19-2002, 09:30 PM   #20  
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i've been reading this thread, and trying to avoid it. that means it's an excellent question and i SHOULD pay attention to it!!!!

ok. let's add me to the long list of those who were very tall in school and those who developed early. and to make things a little worse, i was a year younger than everyone because i had skipped a grade.

i was pretty normal until my sophomore year in HS, when i was placed on a now-off-the-market antihistamine, teldrin. didn't learn for years that it messed up serotonin levels, which play a role in appetite control.

started gaining weight. lost 70 pounds my senior year. gained 25 or so freshman year of college. lost it. gained another 70. lost it on WW starting after graduation. and was exhausted at my goal weight. felt lots of energy and looked great at 170-180, but could barely move at 150.

and then the cycling got worse. about 5 years ago, i hurt my knee and couldn't move for a few months. 100 pounds. then dad got sick, i kept getting pneumonia and bronchitis, and couldn't move. so, add stress to a 2-hour one way commute, a sick dad, and lots of lung problems.

so i couldn't move. and kept gaining weight. on august 13, 2001, i stood up, and immediately collapsed. couldn't breathe, couldn't move. couldn't walk. and spent the next 5 weeks in the hospital, and then 3 in a nursing home learning to walk again.

i hit my highest weight in the hospital on an 800 calorie diet: 506. i gained several pounds a day on this, until they put me on a diuretic.

thank goodness things are better now. my life is getting back to normal, and i'm aiming for the 170-180 range again. and i'm really working towards it.

but i can't 'see' myself. i've never had a concept of my body size, thin or heavy. we've touched on this several times, but it's something i really have to work on [and sundrop, i keep meaning to make a new thread out of some of your comments].
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Old 08-20-2002, 11:51 AM   #21  
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Well, I have always been fat. I suppose there was a small window there where I was "normal" (looking at pics from preschool to first grade, I was tall & bigger than the other girls, but not fat). But, I have been overweight since about the 2nd grade. I was fat through gradeschool, jr. high school, high school, & college. It is amazing the damage the comments of other kids can have on a person (still dealing with some of that ) I was lucky, though. Most of the comments came from people that I didn't have to see every day (kids from other schools, the mall, etc.) My school was really small, & I was in the "popular" group.

Anyway, I'm 24 now, & finally doing something about it... and it feels GREAT!
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Old 08-20-2002, 01:58 PM   #22  
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I'm like a lot of other who have posted here. I was always the tall, big girl in school. (I'm 5'9" also). So when I compared myself to the little size 6 girls, I was "huge" wearing a size 12/14. I look back at high school pix now and think I looked pretty good.

I hated getting weighed in gym class. It was always humiliating. And it was hard to see the skinny girls "pinch an inch" and complain about being fat. If they were fat, what did that make me?

I could always eat more than most of my friends too. Now I realize that it's because I was 5 or 6 inches taller than they were! Of course my caloric needs were greater but I always felt like a pig because I would get hungry.

I really started packing on the pounds after I got married. We were both students and stayed up late studying and of course eating.

So I guess I would fall into the I always thought I was fat category but it wasn't really until my 20's that I became obese.
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Old 08-20-2002, 03:47 PM   #23  
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Was a chubby child, until I started to exercise... while I was doing daily exercise (until early teens) I was definitely NOT fat, although like many of you, because I was taller/bigger built/more womanly than other girls my age, I thought I was FAT. I only actually BECAME fat when I stopped the daily exercise. Since then I've constantly struggled until my weight got out of control. Guess that tells me what the key to controlling my weight it... the dreaded E word!!!! (How I hate to admit that!!!!)

I still think I'm fat now... and maybe even if reached goal, I still would. Isn't that what they say... once a fat girl, always a fat girl - in your head at least?!

Karen
260.5/168.5/140
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Old 08-20-2002, 05:50 PM   #24  
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KarenUK, I feel the same way. I will always consider myself fat. Not always in a bad way (i've always been the type of person who finds herself pretty darn amazing therefore should not be defined by size) but I worry that even if I get down to my goal weight, I won't be able to maintain it because I'm still a fat girl in my head. Fat girls have desert. Fat girls don't run. etc etc.

It's good to be able to relate. Scary that my fears might be true.
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