Did you ever "feel" fat before you got fat? I have been helping my son gather up old family pictures so he can put them on disk. I have always told my kids "I've always been fat". Finding and looking at pictures of myself as a child and teenager these past couple of weeks, I can see with my own eyes, I wasn't even close to being fat or even chubby, but I always "felt" fat. It makes me wonder if I'm just insane, or has this happened to anyone else. I'd be interested to hear what you all have to say about this. Maybe I am just insane. Or maybe I turned it into a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's amazing how gaining a lot of weight can change your perception of "fat." I've always been overweight since pretty much birth. I look back over my childhood pictures and yes I could've stood to lose a few pounds but I was in no way obese at the time.
When Kirstie Alley was one Oprah, she told her that when she was skinny she had always felt fat and found fault with her body and it wasn't until she lost her 75 pounds to learn to appreciate what she had.
I definately did! And now when I look at myself now I just shakes my head and wonder what I was thinking!! I usually "felt fat" when the time of the month was coming. I retain water like a lake and so every month I definately felt fat!
I think my mom created a lot of my fat "feelings" before it was ever an issue. I remember we'd be shopping for a swimsuit or even just clothes and I'd try a bunch on and she'd point out that one was so "flattering" and "really made me look thin" (as if it was an illusion or something). I've carried that "looking thin" mentality into dressing rooms ever since then (and I'm talking as a 10-11-12 yr old). So I make it a POINT to NEVER mention "flattering" or "good coloring" or "looking thinner" or "makes you look chubby" or ANYTHING like that to my daughters (14 and 9) when they're looking for clothes. I want them to ENJOY their clothing...and get what they like just because they like it and feel fabulous in it.
So yes....I completely felt fat LONG before I was fat.
PS..I have great kids with great self confidence...I'm so proud of each of them. It's very important to me that they grow up loving who they are not for what they do or what they know but because they are beloved children of God.
I have the opposite problem, I feel thinner than I am, I don't feel skinny, but I don't feel that I am a size 24, I feel more like a 18, until I put on clothes, or look in the mirror, then the fantasy ends,lol. I need a full length mirror in my house bad, to remind me of my body.
cheryl
my life exactly! when i was around 160 lbs and a size 10, i thought i was huge and couldnt live with myself and now that i look back at those pictures.. i want to cry! how could i have thought i was fat? i agree with the girl who says that being overweight now actually changes views on things,.
For me, it was the messages I received from my family. All tall, uberthin and small breasted. I'm tall, no curves and large breasted. I think the early development of my breasts also aided in my fat feelings, noone in my family had more than a B cup and by age 12 I was in a D. I stuck out like a sore thumb and I think my family, especially the women thought forcing me to lose weight would make my breasts go away. It didn't and now I'm truly fat and unhealthy. Looking back at old pictures, I get angry at the messages, subtle and in your face I got about my weight issues. 5'11" and 127-150 lbs is NOT and will NEVER be considered overweight. Yet, thats what I was told. Anyways, yeah I felt it.
Now, when I think about it some more, I think a lot of my feelings were guided by family comments. I had a cousin who WAS obese as a child, and my mom commented on every bite I put in my mouth "you don't want to end up looking like C., do you?" The funny thing was, my mom was overweight too. Yet at the same time, my dad was the kind who made you eat everything on your plate, or be punished. eeeek, how was a kid to know what to do? No wonder I had self image issues (and still do).
Yup - I was another who was average-sized and fit and was (forcibly) convinced I was fat! Starting around age 12 or so, my mom's mantra was how "lucky" I was that SHE didn't tell me I was fat, when I weighed 20 pounds more than SHE did at my age and her family teased her about it. Yeah... somehow, all that came through was that a) I was fat, and b) I was SO fat that my mother needed to comment even though she didn't want to. (Nevermind the fact that I had 4 inches on her and a totally different build!)
I actually came across an old picture of myself at about age 14 this weekend. I know I probably weighed about 150 or so (at 5'6"), (and I only know this because my driver's license weight STILL says 140, which was what I was LYING about at age 14!). I thought I was hideous and fat and all sorts of things - I'm holding my arm in front of my "belly" and was uncomfortable in the sleeveless shirt:
I literally cried when I was looking at this picture - how I wish I could tell that poor girl what I know now!
The funniest part is that I have the opposite experience now - I think I'm thinner than I am until I see pictures! Back then, I thought I was a cow and the pictures show otherwise - now I think I'm pretty darn hot (and, frankly, I am!) but occasionally a picture shows I'm bigger than I realize.
Last edited by Rock Chalk Chick; 05-15-2007 at 06:38 PM.
I definately felt that way when I was younger.My kids have looked at pictures of me before I had them and my oldest says I was so skinny.If only I had felt that way back then!
Now I have the opposite problem though.I know I am really overweight,but I don't feel like I am...that is,until I look at pictures.Then it hits me.The mirrors aren't as tough on me as pictures,but I sometimes wish they were.
Yes, I can relate. My mother dragged me to Weight Watchers when I was fourteen because she was afraid I'd get fat. I was five feet seven and weighed 128! I'll never see that number again-I'd look ill. Up until that year, I had no problems whatsoever with overeating, and walked and rode my bike everywhere. After I lost seven pounds weight watchers said I "needed" to lose, I started on a cycle-went from 121 to 142, back to weight watchers, gained it back plus ten more pounds, then gave up and started on a horrible cycle of sneaking food. I stopped my long walks/bike rides. In college I was around 155, and felt like I was so fat. Now that's lower than my goal weight!
Yes, I can relate. My mother dragged me to Weight Watchers when I was fourteen because she was afraid I'd get fat. I was five feet seven and weighed 128! I'll never see that number again-I'd look ill. Up until that year, I had no problems whatsoever with overeating, and walked and rode my bike everywhere. After I lost seven pounds weight watchers said I "needed" to lose, I started on a cycle-went from 121 to 142, back to weight watchers, gained it back plus ten more pounds, then gave up and started on a horrible cycle of sneaking food. I stopped my long walks/bike rides. In college I was around 155, and felt like I was so fat. Now that's lower than my goal weight!
Sherry
My mom "offered" weight watchers to me, too! I was in 8th grade and developing hips. I weighed under 120 and was probably a size 5. The sad thing is my mom has ALWAYS been obsessing about her weight and always is on a diet. She has never been really thin. I vowed not to be like her so I didn't obsess at all...hahaha....and gained up to 261!
Sherry - I don't think Weight Watchers should have even taken you! What were they thinking???
I am in the same boat. I don't remember ever thinking I was skinny. I compared myself to my older sister, who is several inches shorter than I am and has always been petite. I remember going shopping with my mom when I was around 13 and getting a pair of size 10 jeans. I remember this trip because my mom said that I had to get them (they were Calvin Kleins too) because it was hard to find clothes that fit me. But I don't remember her ever saying I was fat or that I needed to lose weight. After high school I went to visit my sister, and we went shopping. I was mortified that I couldn't fit into a juniors size 13. My troubles began then. I had no clue how to cook or eat healthy and no one to show me (my mom died when I was 14). I also couldn't stick to an exercise program and didn't ride my bike everywhere anymore.
I found some high school pictures last fall and I couldn't believe I was that thin! I framed one and it is hanging on my living room wall for motivation. I'll never be 18 again, and don't want to. But that skinny girl is inside me, and I am going to set her free!
Oh how I can relate to this one. I've felt overweight ever since I hit adolescence. I think it wasn't my family that made me feel that way so much as what I saw in magazines, movies, the "perfect" body images around us. As I look back on it, I also think a lot of my negative self-thoughts in my teens and twenties had to do with my chest size - I am indeed well-endowed, and I don't think I knew how to deal with that in comparison to what I saw around me.
My mother put together a photo album for me last year for my 40th birthday, and I was shocked at both ends of the spectrum - first, I couldn't believe how much I had let weight add on in recent years (and that's what jump-started me on this journey) and second, I couldn't believe that the girl I was in my younger years was not overweight in the way I recalled, but was an attractive girl, with an absolutely normal body type - how I wish I could talk to her now! Well, life is a journey and we all learn along the way.
Yes, I can relate to that thought. Another thread got me pondering the same question. I remember in about 5th grade thinking that I was fat. I don't know what made me think that. I look back at pictures now and wonder "what was I thinking"? I wasn't fat. I don't know at what point in time, I became what I had thought I was.
"Feeling" fat question
Or maybe I turned it into a self-fulfilling prophecy.
