before, yes, all the time. My aunts always make comment "i think you gain some weights", "you need to lose some weights", etc....
After doing this journey, the comments have become more pleasant, such as "you're getting thinner and thinner", and yesterday, one of my bf's friend said "you keep getting hotter".
So yah, at least I know that this journey pays off well ^^
My mom tells me constantly "you need to start exercising or something!" even though I exercise daily and am, in fact, losing weight. But NO, you can't point out the positives! Not to family members! [/sarcasm]
Also overheard recently: my dad referring to me as his "fat daughter."
I think they believe they are being helpful and this will encourage me to lose weight. I think they're going about it wrong, if that is their intent. Both are overweight, BTW.
This has gone on forever though. When I was in high school and weighed no more than 135, no belly to speak of, I thought I looked pretty good, my mom would look at my clothes and tell me my legs were too fat to wear dresses, or my ankles looked swollen, could I be pregnant? That sort of thing.
Oh the comments
1.A teacher called on me in 7th grade,I didn't know the answer,so he said that is why you are fat. You don't think you just keep eating,when you are not hungry.
2. You will always be fat,because you don't want to lose weight.{mother}
3.Don't you have any willpower,what is wrong w/you?{aunt}
4.Had a priest laugh at me,when someone made a comment about my weight.
Those are the top 4. Not to mention all the humiliation in front of people.{by family}
I've had all kinds of comments from all sorts of people:
#1: My most well remembered: I was at a picnic with a friend. It was his family hosting it. A friend of theirs, who happened to be a ministers wife, was sitting next to me. We were talking about pregnancies. Her daughter had just had her first baby. At some point she turned to me and said "No one would ever know if you got pregnant, your so fat!" Yeah... and get this... her daughter... was 15. CONGRATS Grandma, you must be soooo proud.
#2: My husband has been a constant source of irratation. Even before I gained all the weight he called me "Chubby." When I explained why this irratated me, his response was that he thought it was a compliment, "You know, like a cherub." Now its things like "Makes you easier to catch," "Hard to miss," ECT. Guess what... hes extremely overweight and was just diagnosed as diabetic too. Least now I can say I'm trying and that "Death to us part" will no longer be ME having a heart attack, so bite me!
#3: Family- my family has right out told me I'm fat and have no qualms about hurting my feelings so I've been the butt of their joke many times, even as a small child. And I wonder why I became an emotional eater? Yeah, I try not to talk those people anymore.
I added my two cents at the end of the each one because it makes me remember, these people are not perfect and have NO room to judge others, even though they do so anyways! I'm learning to ignore the negativeness of everyone else. I know me better than anyone else and I know I can do this!
My mother, she always comments about weight, no one is safe, she had made comments about my nieces and when we go out she always says you know you should do like I do and only eat half, after of course you ate the whole thing.
My mother in law said something so heinous to me today that I am struggling to not go on a killing spree.
She has gotten real nasty since I started working out more/eating differently because she has been a proud anorexic who thought the most important thing in her life was her 23 inch waist which has now gone to **** because she eats pounds of cookie dough in the middle of the night.
Today I mentioned that I skipped the gym because I was so exhausted (this is the first day I have missed in a long time) and she said "I don't know why you go, you could just purge and get the same result".
Boy, was I mad. I'm still mad. This is the latest in a series of nasty comments ("I don't know why you're bothering, you aren't going to be able to see any progress", "I'd kill myself if I looked like that", and so on) and I'm just so irate.
I know I should be understanding because she used to be super thin and now she's got a huge gut but isn't fat anywhere else, but I'm not understanding. I'm offended at how she treats me and I can't find it in me to be understanding.
I wish I could come to each of your houses and give you a big hug because NONE of you deserve to hear ANYTHING like this from ANYONE! How ridiculous!! And these are supposed to be from people who LOVE you?? Don't listen!! Those people are totally stupid. Seriously, love yourself, believe in yourself, lose weight for yourself, your health and your happiness, and just tune this rude crap out. Seriously!
One of my sisters and I went to a bank and we had to talk to the bank manager. My sister does look somewhat like Reba McEntire and the bank manager always laughed and called her Reba. So this day when we go in, my sister says "Hey, it's Reba and I brought my sister Roseanne." In reference to Roseanne Barr-Arnold. I wanted the floor to swallow me up but of course it didn't.
The other day while I was snacking on cucumbers and hummus my sister-in law asked me why I wasn't having any crackers. I told her I'm on low-carb and I've been avoding high carb food. She said I was sick in the head and I had problems.
I don't know why people can't mind their own business. If I choose not to eat carbs (I only get my carbs from fruits&veggies) it's my problem.
ugghh im angry..
My family would do the "you would be s0o pretty if you just lost x-amount of weight".
Kind of strips you down, you know?
I got this ALL the time from family. My sister used to say "when you lost that weight, you were breathtakingly beautiful, I was sssssooooo jealous of you!" and other lovely comments about when I was thin, which was for 3 years out of my 45 years of life on this planet.
I always got as a child "someday, you'll be beautiful if you could JUST get the weight off!", "exercise some more, you're too beautiful too hide behind all that fat!", "how did you end up with such a weight problem with skinny parents and family?", "you'll be beautiful someday when you lose that baby fat!". Oh, there were numerous comments.
Nice ones in front of the families friends, such as "I don't know where she got her weight problems, but I was NEVER that big as a child!" and "she don't take after our side of the family for her weight problem, as we're all thin on my side!" and so on.
I ate too much, didn't exercise too much (as opposed to family members who sat in front of the boob tube eating fattening foods all day while not gaining a pound thanks to great metabolisms) even though I was outside all day, everyday, rain, sleet, hot weather, running around and playing hard. I was lazy, I didn't care about myself, I was an excuse maker.
Oy, these are the kinder comments. Thin cousins, mostly boys, had some really mean comments to say to me during family reunions. That's probably why I don't have much to do with them anymore.
I also got to hear about a cousin of mine and how beautiful she is- her and I are close in age. Yeah, she's a drug addict, alcoholic, abandoned her two older kids, had another one with a guy who has nothing to do with her or her daughter, abandoned her own mother when she needed her the most. Yeah, she may be beautiful, but if all I had to do was party and play all day and shun my responsibilities while family, friends, and boyfriends paid my way, I'd be a beautiful toothpick, too.
This kind of felt good to get this off of my chest, I must say. Especially since I declined going to a family reunion due to the fact that the 40 pounds I lost I gained back thanks to Grave's disease. While I am slowly losing some of it now, I am very disheartened that all of my hard work went down the sewer because of illness, and now my family just has that fat eyesore to look at once again stuffing her face across the room..........nah, I'll skip this reunion, thanks very much.
When I was a teenager, my dad would sometimes comment on what I was eating, i.e. "you're really going to eat that much [insert junk food]?" just little comments like that. It always hurt, but you know what, it didn't stop me from eating the junk. I just wanted more. Then from about 18-21 when I was home from college, whenever I'd mention I was thinking about going to work out or go for a walk or something, he would act shocked/in disbelief that I, the lazy one, would even think about working out. He never believed I would do it, or stick with it. and I never did, because heck if my own dad doesn't believe I can do it, I probably can't.
It sucked, and thinking about those little comments still hurts, but I think dad was just trying to get me to stop eating junk and work out more, albeit in a messed up sort of way. He was probably afraid I would gain a load of weight and get diabetes, which happened to my mom. I don't know what I would have said if I were in his position, because really anything he would have said to me when I was a teenager would have hurt my feelings, but at the same time he probably didn't want to say *nothing*.
So, at any rate, I've gained a load of weight, and I want to lose it before I develop diabetes as well. I just won't tell anybody but internet strangers and DH I'm doing it, because I don't want to hear the slew of hurtful comments.
Yes, my dad and my grandmother mainly. It really bothers me. I know they just want me to be healthy, but in reality it makes the situation worse and makes me feel even worse about everything. My mom does too, but it doesn't usually bother me when she does.
