[Sockerton]

I can't go on Facebook anymore. I friended all these people I went to school with. I get so jealous and mad and sad when people say they are pregnant. I know I should be happy for them, but I can't help it.

I haven't been officially diagnosed with PCOS because I don't have insurance. I have all the symptoms and am having a hard time getting pregnant. I confered with a doctor who is a friend of mine. I don't want an official diagnosis because it would be considered a preexisting condition if I eventally get insurance. He said I have all the signs and symptoms of PCOS and my heart sank.

I just spent a half an hour crying because of all the people online who are pregnant or who already have a ton of kids. I am jealous and I feel horrible that I feel that way. I came here because there are people in this forum who might know what I am going through.

I want kids. I want them so badly I am crying right now writing this. I am 29 and single. I feel that with my weight issues, I will never find someone in time to have a family with. I don't know what to do.

I am living my life like I have PCOS. I started a diet that deals with insulin resistance. Hopefully I can drop the weight and these fertility issues will resolve without medical intervention. Or I can get insurance soon

Sorry for the long "feeling sorry for myself" rant. I just don't know where to turn to when I feel like this.

[chikygrl13]

<<HUGS>>
I know EXACTLY how you feel!!
Now I don't have PCOS, I don't think. But my weight has become such an issue that I just don't ovulate... (hence the trying to lose weight!)
Add the fact that although I LOVE my boyfriend we both know that kids would be a VERY BAD idea right now, we're having a hard enough time with his 13 year old daughter.

IF PCOS is your only issue, don't get too discouraged. It is relatively commonplace nowadays and is not necessarily the problem it used to be. I know SEVERAL women who have PCOS and have gone on to have healthy, happy babies. SOME of these women needed a little extra help (Clomid) but NOT ALL of them.

My friend Lori was diagnosed with PCOS about 3 years ago, shortly after she got married. Within 3 months of her diagnosis (and several second and third opinions) she was pregnant with no help, Alexander will be 2 in May, fast forward to 9 months ago... and Lori, who STILL has PCOS goes on Birth Control to regulate her periods... She misses ONE pill and gets preggers! (Rielly should be making his appearance any day now...)

My best advice would be to get insurance, if possible. And get it checked out.

As for weight effecting your ability to have a relationship... BOLLOCKS!
I've been where you are, and I've felt the same feelings. Lose weight for YOU, not to get a man. In the mean time, there are PLENTY of men out there who like women with a little meat on their bones.

[Sockerton]

Thank you so much. I needed that.

[Nicoyaangel]

I know how you feel. When my dr told me to try without anything for a year I said ummm I'm giving it 6 months and if nothing I'm getting help. I didn't want to go to my boyfriends friends baby shower party. Why?! So I can be depressed even more. He really wants kids. His hints are now bold statements. LOL So we are trying. Plus I feel like the scale is moving the wrong direction. I went from 239 to 242. Ugh! Guess I'm doing something wrong again!

Im always here if you need to vent. But you are not alone. I know you will did someone to accept you for you. I never thought I would. Come to find out I found someone and the man I dreamed about my entire life (no joke scary yet long story LOL)

I know that didn't help much but it will happen

[Sockerton]

Right now, I don't have any desire to go out to meet people. The last time I went on a date was 6 months ago. It ended when he told me his views on marriage.

What makes it worse is that I am unemployed. I used to have a really good job and made a ton of money. Now, I have nothing. I have $20 in my bank account. I am trying to get something. Anything. The sad part is I have 2 bachelors degrees and I can't find anything. I have a degree in Exercise and Sports science. But the only thing I can find around here to do with that is being a personal trainer. Who the **** wants an overweight personal trainer? I am 6'1" and 258 pounds and have a bad back. Not my dream job. Oh, did I mention that I broke a tooth. Right in the front. Not only am I fat but I am toothless. As soon as I can get the money, I am getting an implant. But until then, I am stuck.

I am rereading this as I type it. I am sorry I am going on about everything. But I don't know who else would understand. All my friends are married and have cute little kids. And if I have to go to one more baby shower, I just might actually scream.

[Nicoyaangel]

Have you tried Google-ing free clinics in your area? When my boyfriend started his job he had to find a dr fast for something. I for what buy anyways he went to a free clinic. I mean FREE. They just had him fill out basic info and was seen by a dr, given meds and walked out of there without having to pay a dime. Or a penny

Maybe you can look for a free clinic about checking you out for PCOS or refering you to low cost or free dentist.

I will pray/chant for you to get a job & that everything you ask for you get.

[Sockerton]

I'm afraid to go somewhere and they say I have PCOS and put it in my medical records. Then it might be considered a preexisting condition. My friend was a few weeks pregnant and didn't know it when she got a new job. A month later, she ended up having a miscarriage. The insurance did not want to cover it because it was a preexisting condition. I know that sounds crazy, but if I didn't read the letter myself, I would have never believed it.

I think for right now, I am just going to stick self help. The whole insulin resistant diet thing and some homeopathic care.

Thanks for the reply and the well wishes. I hope you get your little baby soon, too.

[Dab52776]

Sockerton... I'm another PCOSer who can completely understand your desire for having a child and the frustration over not being able to. Even though I've resigned myself to never having kids, I still cry every time I hear of someone new becoming pregnant. I also know that I should be happy for them (and on some level I am), but it's so hard not to feel sorry for yourself when that happens. We are here for you, and we definitely understand

I too will pray for your job/ insurance situation. Take care!

[HeatherMcG]

I totally understand. I have family members who are due within 2 weeks of each other this summer. I want to run away screaming every time someone asks what is taking us so long, and when we are going to start trying. Its like, shut up people, I'm not barren by choice.

[MakingSkinny]

I just wanted to chime in to let you know that having PCOS and being overweight does not necessarily mean you are destined to be child-free!

I got married in May 1999, and we started trying to get pregnant right away. I was somewhere around 200lbs (at 5'0"). My periods were sporadic, at best. I charted religiously, and rarely, if ever, ovulated. I went through so many tests, and was diagnosed with PCOS. I started Chlomid in Dec 1999. It took until Sept 2001 for me to finally see the + pregnancy test. I totally empathize with you on how hard it is watching everyone around you get pregnant. Especially hard was hearing about those "oops!" or "accidents" or unwanted pregnancies. My first son was born in June 2002.

After baby #1 was born, I ballooned up to my all time high weight of about 260lbs. We started trying for baby #2 pretty much right away, knowing if we were able to get pregnant again, it would likely take some time. During this time, I lost my family doctor and was unable to find another (we've had dr shortage problems). That meant no referral to an OB/gyn for another Chlomid prescription. So I started a strict low-carb diet, managed to drop back to around 200lbs and we were totally shocked when I got pregnant in July 2004. Son #2 was born in April 2005.

After baby #2, we decided we wanted to try for one more, knowing that the odds were against us. I still had never ovulated with any regularity or predictability. I clawed my way down to about 180lbs, got pregnant again in November 2006, but lost the baby early on. The depression from that threw off my weight loss and I went up to around 195. Then in July 2007 we were shocked to find out I was pregnant again. Son #3 was born in April 2008.

So I went from being told by a fertility spcialist in 1999 that I was infertile and would likely never get pregnant, to having 4 pregnancies and 3 beautiful children by 2008. My husband even got a vasectomy in November, just to be safe LOL


I also want to say that being overweight absolutely does not mean there aren't great men out there who are willing to look beyond that and see the beautiful person you are! When I met my then boyfriend (now husband), we were both in high school. I was smaller than I am now, but I was still quite overweight at about 160lbs. That was in 1997. By the time we got married in 1999, I was around 200lbs. I thought I looked like a fat cow in my wedding dress, especially next to my scrawny-butt husband-to-be (LOL), but the way he looked at me made me feel beautiful. His love for me is not bound by my weight. He tells me every day with his looks, his actions and his words that he thinks I'm beautiful and sexy and desirable. He's my best friend and my biggest supporter.

Be confident in yourself and the awesome person you are. Don't hide behind your weight, embrace your inner beauty and it will shine through no matter what size the outside package is. And any man worth being your husband will see it and love you and desire you the way you deserve to be

[Nicoyaangel]

Just found out today - on the famous Facebook - that my friend from highschool is Pregnant AGAIN with a boy. I didn't even know she was pregnant. Seriously?! This blows!

[Sockerton]

I just saw another picture of an old friend on Facebook who is about 8 months pregnant with her 4 year old daughter touching her belly and smiling.

I have to stop going on Facebook. It just makes me feel like **** every time I see these things.

Glad to know I'm not alone.

[Nicoyaangel]

Ugh! I know what you mean. Maybe having the updates sent to my phone isn't such a good idea. That's how I find out. I have all the updates sent to my phone.

I have pcso's diagnosed late last year and am now on clomid to try and make my cycles more regular.I have had 6 miscarriages each at about 7-8 weeks but every time there has been nothing which makes them think that they have all been chemical pregnancies.
Nearly all my friends have babies, there is a woman in work who has just said she is preggers and doesnt want it everywhere i look there are pregnant women and it hurts so much.

i know how you feel...its rubbish, its like a tight feeling in ur chest every time you hear about it. my best friend has just had a baby she wants me to be as close as I can but despite me playing it over and over I cant. simple, selfish and simple! i have lost 6 and cant give much love to anyone elses im afraid....

stay off facebook its good for nothing except making u feel low.

[HeatherMcG]

2 more facebook announcements for me.... sigh....