[Totally Neck-ed]

Thanks Kim,

I do or I would just see faults. lol

Take care

[Lafayette]

How about asking him to help you? Explain how his habits and comments aren't motivating to you. Make him work for what he wants- he'll be healthier and better looking, too! Or at least he'll watch the kids and throw in a load of laundry... He needs to learn that honesty is not the same as shutting up. It sounds like his support would get you much further faster!

My boyfriend is 6'3" to my 5'5" so I tell him I can't see the hair loss and he claims my chest blocks his view of my belly. We are working out together and eating better together- it's hard but it's easier than the alternative. Is it honest? Yup. We will both need to get stronger glasses so I'm sure we are never going to wrinkle, either.

[blues4miles]

Originally Posted by Lafayette

My boyfriend is 6'3" to my 5'5" so I tell him I can't see the hair loss and he claims my chest blocks his view of my belly.

I love it Lafayette!

And actually, I think his comment about being in the doghouse was more hurtful than his initial comment...that kind of talk reinforces a man's complaining about his "witchy" wife. However, all of this overheard or repeated stuff is hard to understand out of context. Perhaps in both cases he was trying to defend you, but it came out wrong.

[Totally Neck-ed]

The Doghouse comment.. See I didn't see hurtful at all.. to me was guy talk for .." I screwed up again. .. help me!"

[BrunetteChic_2000]

OMGosh! If I heard my husband say that to me we would not be sleeping in the same house. What a TERRIABLE thing to say!!! I am 27, 5'7" and started my weight loss when I went to the Dr. and weighed in at 202. I am down to 190 after a month and a half of work, it is slow but it is coming off. If I didn't have my husbands total support - meaning he will love me and treat me like a sexy, desirable woman pounds on or pounds off - I wouldn't be able to lose weight and stay in the relationship with him.
I started weight watchers a week before New Years and he was VERY supportive - he even bought me a nice scale that stores your info and gives body fat and stuff. So I could tell that he was happy I was ready to really commit to weight loss - which made me feel a little bad because I felt a little like I had been a bad wife for being overweight, but on the other hand it made me feel SO GOOD that hadn't ever said anything to me or even let on that he was turned off by my weight.
I know that I have the best husband in the world. I am begining to think that he should give a class on how to love your wife properly!
You need to lose weight for you, not for anyone else, and I am sure that you know this.

[Lafayette]

I have one thing for you to think about: a lot of people- men and women- lose weight and gain the self-confidence to see that their partner is an ***. Some partners are right to worry that their mate will leave when he/she loses weight. Talk to him about it and how he makes you feel or start arranging your finances and retain the nastiest divorce lawyer in your neighborhood.

[liz321]

I agree! I was starting to feel like some sort of alien.

Truthfully my husband wants me to be happy. He knows I don't like it when I have to buy what fits not what I like, or when I am down on myself for my extra weight etc. He supports my weight loss attempts for those reasons. He is happy for my successes but never loves me less, or comments unkindly and certainly never to his friends in the "locker room". When I make comments about his attraction to me based on my weight he is shocked......but it is his behavior that reminds me the most that his feelings for me are genuine...no matter how I look or feel. Frankly it is my unhappiness that is hardest on him......not his desire for me to be thin.

Hope that makes sense.

Liz

[happydaisy]

Totally agree layfayette and liz... I had a husband that made comments like that and it wasn't the only thing he was mean about...