Depression and Weight Issues - Ups & Downs Support Group: April 2014




IBelieveInMe2
04-03-2014, 10:50 AM
Hello Everyone and :welcome3: to the April thread for the Ups & Downs Support Group! If you are new to the group, please post and tell us a little (or a lot) about yourself. If you are already part of the group, please post and let us know that you made it to the new thread! Everyone is welcome to participate. All that we ask is that you are willing to give and receive support in your weight loss journey. The name Ups and Downs reflects the ups and downs of life in general and especially life with depression and on medication, as well as the ups and downs in our weight. This is our space, so post away!!! Glad you found us! ;)


ohiofreespirit
04-03-2014, 06:46 PM
Hi friends.

I hope this post finds you well.

I have been feeling pretty good, my mood is up. My anxiety is so so. Overall I am doing well. I am very lucky. The meds are doing their job which is all I can ask of them. I have had 3 days of appts, 1 Dr's appt, 1 chiropractor appt, 1 appt with the practitioner who gives me my meds for my depression. I've had a busy week.

They have pulled me out of one of my client's homes. They have bed bugs there. I'm the one who found them last week. The people that lived there didn't even know they had them. I found them in my client's clothes. They called me today and told me that we aren't going back in the home until the bugs are all gone. I understand but feel bad for my elderly client.


I want to tell you something funny. I got my eyebrows done today. She got them way, way too thin. I should be upset but I look kinda funny. I'm not taking it that seriously, it'll grow back and it doesn't look that bad, just weird. :D


I will check back in a day or two until then much love to all.

Fiona W
04-03-2014, 10:17 PM
Howdy folks! I'm doing pretty well these days, churning out letters & postcards & original collage postcards at a decent pace, and digging back into my French reading and vocab. In reply to my long decorated letter in a handmade envelope, my Belgian friend Robine sent me a commercial card with one paragraph on it. I really expected a letter. She sounds like she's afraid of our relationship, at the same time she says she's "happy & proud" to be my friend. I'm still hopin' that she will get her pen and her heart moving across multiple pages for me, but I'm basically a hopeful person (when not depressed, of course). What can I do but write her back, say things to alleviate her fears, and see what happens from there...

I have another friend, an Aussie who lives near Sydney, who's bipolar, and I'm worried about her. She always gets a kick out of it when I send her batches of postcards in series, and she's fascinated by fonts, so I've been sending her an A to Z series of letter postcards, each letter in a different typeface. Sending one of them every postal day, I'm now all the way up to S and I haven't heard a peep from her. And she hasn't logged onto any of her usual Web haunts since late February. So I'm thinkin' maybe she's gone into a depression... =sigh=

Foodwise, I'm still undereating. I don't know why...I just have no appetite. I'm doing my leg exercises every night to try to jazz my metabolism. And I'm still struggling with insomnia. The only way I can get to sleep is to take a large dose of benzo, and my prescription is only for 15 of them a month. I don't want any more than that, 'cause if I took 'em every night I'd just get tolerant, and then they wouldn't work anymore.

But heck, if insomnia is the worst of my problems, I call that a good deal! =smile= What I do when I can't sleep is read detective novels until dawn, and there's no scarcity of detective novels in the world.

ohiofreespirit— Jeez, that's a bummer about the bedbugs. But I'm glad your mood is up. You sound like someone who knows how to count her blessings: I admire that!


1life2liv
04-03-2014, 10:56 PM
Happy April everyone!!!! Not much has changed sine my last posts... I weighed in for the week, my first week on the diet pills, and lost 7 pounds!!! I'm so happy to lose weight again. That puts me at a total of 25 so far since January .

On a personal note I have been told that my job will be having a full time position opening up soon (hint hint) as my boss put it. It would be so nice to have benefits and paid vacation but I'm still going to school so I'm not sure I'm up for working full time and going to school full time, all while trying to make time for my three year old. I'll have to weigh the pros and cons I suppose.

So I am bad about setting small goals and always want to aim for the big picture. For example instead of wanting to focus on losing another ten pounds, I want to lose 100 total by June of next year. Is that unreasonable? I was 150 a year ago so I feel like I should be able to lose it in a year and a half. I feel like I'm setting myself up for disappointment. I can say, though, this is the first time I have dieted and not tried to "cheat" the diet. Before I would work hard at it all week and then go crazy on the weekend. Or I would eat a salad but fill it with bacon, cheese, and ranch. Or add food into my fitness pal and put in one portion of something and actually ate double the serving. Also usually when I diet I seem to be hungrier than ever and crave ONLY the things I shouldn't eat. This time though, I am actually enjoy heating healthy, feel like it is a life change, and BELIEVE IN MYSELF!!! But I must remind myself, easy does it, one day at a time.

Until next time, stay awesome xoxoxox

Fiona W
04-04-2014, 06:13 PM
I had an astonishing experience today. There's this 7-11 I go by on my way back from the post office (and I go to the p.o. 3-4 days a week) where I used to buy diet soda and the cookies I used to binge on. They're those bakery-made cookies in packs of 3, fresh every morning, and they come in 3 different varieties. I used to think of them as A, B & C cookies, where I had a definite preference for the A variety, liked just fine the B variety, and really did not like the C variety. I knew the morning patterns of that 7-11 very well: when the cookies arrived from the bakery, and when the store got packed with Hispanic day laborers buying their provisions for the day, mostly bottled water and sweets. The workmen seemed to prefer the A cookies as much as I did, 'cause there were rarely any left by 9 AM, and definitely none left by the afternoon....except on the occasional days when the workmen didn't show up. Like rainy days, wintry days.

So here I was, today, coming back from the p.o. and needing to buy something that was easy to pick up at that 7-11. I've been to that 7-11 a few times since I became binge-free in November, but not since I gave up diet soda. Now the cookies are displayed right on the counter between the two registers: you can't avoid being confronted with them. This would be the first time I'd have to stand there in front of the cookies without having my hands full with 6, 10, 12 bottles of diet soda. But I figured, "No big deal. It's afternoon on a nice day: the day laborers will have wiped out all the A cookies."

Instead, what happened was, I had to stand there for a looooong time, right in front of the cookie basket, because the guy ahead of me was buying all these complicated lottery & keno tickets, and guess what....there were three packages of the A cookies in the basket (!), more than enough, when combined with a couple packs of the B variety, for a good ol' fashioned Fiona binge. I couldn't take my eyes off those cookies! I could smell them right through the plastic! My mouth was literally watering! They were burning a hole in my consciousness! It hasn't been that long since I last ate them...only about 4 months! I wasn't thinking about will power, or about "brain over binge": all I could think about was those cookies.

But I didn't buy any. I purchased my item and left the store. When I got into my car, I just sat there for several minutes, shaking my head in amazement and thinking, "It's over. It's really over. I am no longer the slave of cookies." I used to buy other cookies, too, at other places, but if I had consciously set out to do so, I could not have devised a tougher test than the one I had just gone through.

Now I may buy an occasional organic vegan cookie (only 1 to a pack), but that's not in the same league. My bondage is over!!

It's incredible, just incredible...

1life2liv
04-05-2014, 11:18 PM
Fiona!!!!! It is so great to hear that you overcame the cookie obstacle. And I know how hard it is to resist something when it is right in front of you!!!! Way to go girl and keep up the good work!!!!

so its a weekend and im really bad about splurging on the weekends because we are out and about so much and tend to eat most of our meals out. well guess what we did today??? we ate out for breakfast lunch AND dinner!! BUT guess what else..... I made healthy choices at all three meals. turkey bacon and egg whites for breakfast, salad for lunch and grilled chicken and veggies for dinner. I am so proud of myself! I feel like things are going too smooth this time, like its all going to fall apart at anytime. this is again where I have to remind myself, easy does it, one day at a time.

until next time stay awesome, xoxoxoxox

Fiona W
04-06-2014, 03:18 PM
Good for you, 1life2liv, that you had such a great day eating out with healthy choices at all three meals! I'm too much of a homebody to eat out that much, but I did go to a Thai restaurant last night with my husband's family. I got grilled salmon with a sesame ginger topping that was delicious, forced myself to eat a few boring broccoli florets, and didn't have one grain of rice. And my mood stayed good all evening even though the rapid conversation was challenging!

It's a beautiful day today and I wish I could say I'm going to take a walk, but I'm afraid I'm just dying to get in my collage room and work on my new piece....

fatchicslim726
04-06-2014, 05:52 PM
Hi y'all! I'm new to 3FC. My name is Laura, I'm 28 and I suffer from BDD, MDD, OCD and Social Anxiety. I am not currently medicated. I moved to Florida from my home state of Kentucky. I have yet to seek out medical help for my disorders here. Because of my social anxiety I have a hard time making appointments and following through with them. It gives me so much anxiety just thinking about having to call them to make the appointments, let alone leaving my home to go. My husband doesn't understand at all.

JElis017
04-06-2014, 06:02 PM
hello! I'm new to the site logged in a few months ago and then just got busy. I've been diagnosed with depression anxiety and add. I work with young adults with special needs and love my job. I have two daughters and a husband.
Back in my you get days I was very athletic. I still love working out to this day but life has gotten in my way. My weight gain if 40 pounds has increased my depression and it's just a vicious cycle I was put on Paxil a year ago for anxiety and the weight gain happened in literally two months. Now it's stuck!!
I'm hoping to just get support and ideas here. I need something different so I hope this is a move in the right direction.

IBelieveInMe2
04-07-2014, 12:24 AM
fatchicslim726: :wel3fc: and :welcome3: to our group Ups & Downs! So happy you found us! Sorry to sound ignorant, but please let me know what BDD and MDD are. I am so sorry that you are untreated where you live now. I hope that you will muster up the courage to call and make appointments, so that you can get on some meds that might help you get some relief from your disorders. I am also heartbroken to hear that your husband doesn't understand at all. That makes things even harder on you. :( Do you have any support people around you in Florida at all? I sure hope so. Even just ONE person that supports you can make a huge difference. Please feel free to share as much (or as little) as you want to here and we will all support you as best we can. I hope that you will consider making that call to have some professional support on your side as well. No pressure........ just hoping and praying for you! :hug:

JElis017: Hello and :welcome: to you as well! You touched my heart when you said you worked with young adults with special needs and love your job! I have a 14-year-old daughter who has Spina Bifida. I so relate to LIFE getting in the way of your workouts. I always seem to get sidetracked by all of the little things each day and find it somehow a challenge to get a workout in..... even though I am a stay-at-home mom and my kids are in school all day! I have to STOP what I am doing and let LIFE wait sometimes and make time for ME! I am no good to anyone else if I don't take care of myself first. But that is often easier said than done. I can also relate to weight gain with meds. I gained 60 pounds over a year's time on Zyprexa (dreadful drug!!!) years ago that I am still trying to get off of my body. I just found out that my thyroid levels were low, though, and got on a low dose of thyroid medication. So I am hopeful once again that maybe if I buckle down and eat healthy and exercise consistently, that I can finally LOSE some of this excess weight! Yes, being overweight is depressing in and of itself, and it does become a vicious cycle. BUT, with one another's help and support, WE CAN DO THIS!!! :D Thank you for posting. I wish you the best of luck on your weight loss journey! :hug:

Fi: I am SO happy for you and proud of you that you RESISTED those cookies at the 7-11!!! :D You are TRULY binge-free and it must feel incredibly wonderful!!! Brain over binge, baby!!! :carrot: On another note, I am sorry to hear that your current relationship with your Belgian friend, Robine, is not going as you had hoped. That must be difficult to accept. I sure hope your Aussie friend is okay and that you hear from her soon. I have a friend who I met on the internet years ago who I corresponded with on a regular basis. Suddenly, she seems to have disappeared from the face of the earth. I am beyond worried about her, but I just pray that she is okay. It is all that I can really do. I do hope that one day she will surprise me with an email. Last I knew, she was gaining weight and not doing very well emotionally. :( Is your appetite back yet? I hope you can manage to eat several small meals (or healthy snacks) during the day to keep your metabolism going for weight loss. I also hope that you get relief from your insomnia. A good night's sleep is so important! Hang in there, my friend! :hug:

ohiofreespirit: I am happy to hear that your mood is up and your meds are doing their job! Sorry about your client who has the bed bugs. I understand you feeling badly for your client since they are elderly, but it truly is in your best interest to stay away until those darn bed bugs are gone. From what I understand, they are extremely difficult to get rid of. That is a funny story about your eyebrows being too thin. :lol: At least you have a sense of humor about it. That is awesome! :)

1life2liv: Congratulations on losing 25 pounds since January!!! That is fantastic!!! :D You should really be proud of yourself! Have you decided if you will go for the full time position at your job? Good luck with whatever you decide to do. That is wonderful that you enjoy eating healthy this time around and really feel like you are making a life change..... AND you believe in yourself. All three of those things are so crucial to success. Keep up the great work! :D Good for you for eating healthy at all three meals OUT yesterday!!! We eat out way too often, so I know how difficult this can be. You sure seem to have your head in the game right now. That is great!

As for me, I have been a bit loose with eating lately. :o I'm not eating terrible things, but just not being as careful with my choices as I should be. I need to refocus my efforts and make healthy eating at each meal a PRIORITY in my life right now. Still exercising twice a week with my trainer and trying to get in at least 2 other days of cardio on my own. Still doing mostly the bike due to plantar fasciitis. I follow up with my podiatrist in the morning (Monday) and will most likely get another steroid shot and get fitted for professional insoles. I will be so happy to get back on the treadmill without pain!!! Hope I look as forward to it when I can do it again as I do now! I have already noticed an increase in my energy level since I began taking the thyroid medication. Fatigue is something I fight very often, so it is a great relief to me to have some energy for a change. :) Waving hello :wave: to everyone!

MonteCristo
04-07-2014, 01:49 PM
Hi all. I'm new to this forum, but I think it may be just what I need.

I was a very dedicated member of 3FC back a few years, losing from 220 to 155 over the course of 2 years. And then a pretty serious family crisis hit, which lasted about 3 years, and completely upset my apple cart. It has been resolved now, but the anxiety issues that I developed during that time got steadily worse and worse. I've always disliked crowds and unexpected changes in plans, but it got to the point I was having panic attacks on a daily basis for apparently no reason, and if a room I was in was small or got crowded things were immeasurably worse. I'm very short tempered anyway, and the constant state of anxiety caused me to be basically vicious all the time. I self medicated with food causing my current weight problem. Finally, enough was enough, and my doctor put me on an anti-depressant, which was awesome...like I was a whole new person.

However, over the past 2-3 years I've gotten in the habit of doing nothing, mainly because it was all I could do to just get through the day at work, and then just sit on the couch the rest of the time. I'm having the hardest time getting back to exercising or cooking or just about anything. I don't "feel" depressed, I partially think I'm just lazy, but I'm ready to start taking little steps towards being "normal" again. I've started cooking again, and started back with some hobbies (finally finished a headboard I started 1 year ago), so I'm feeling good about that, but I know I have a ways to go.

Anyway, so that's my story. I want to lose weight for general health reasons, and specifically because I have severe neck and back pain when I'm heavier, and it is gotten pretty bad since I've been over 220. More energy is another goal.

Thanks for reading all that...felt good to type it out. :)

IBelieveInMe2
04-07-2014, 08:48 PM
MonteCristo: :welcome: to our group! I am happy that you posted. Congratulations on your incredible weight loss from before the family crisis! The fact that you did it before means that YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN!!! It sure sounds like you've had a rough several years, but YOU SURVIVED and you are here reaching out for support!!! That is wonderful! I hope you will find this a safe place to come and give and receive support from others in the group. I wish you the best of luck on your weight loss journey! :hug:

Fiona W
04-08-2014, 09:49 PM
Howdy folks! It's really starting to be gorgeous here: daffodils, forsythia, redbuds, magnolias, dogwoods, the famous DC cherry trees...I could go on and on. The colors of spring where I live are mostly yellow and pink and white, and of course that heartbreaking soft green of the tiny new leaves on all the deciduous trees...

But have I gone for a walk lately? No, no, no. I've been cooped up inside, working like a fiend all weekend and Monday, too, on my biggest collage ever: 11" x 16", both sides. Zillions of gnarly little bits to cut out, layers and layers of background and foreground, and even an elaborate border design. All, I repeat, on both sides.

'Sounds weird, I know...why would anyone make art on both sides of a piece of paper? Because it was for a fold-n-mail project, where you fold your art into thirds, so that the inside becomes the "message" part and the outside becomes the decorated envelope part. You tape it together, arrange a little collage of vintage stamps for the postage, and in the only spot you left bare, write the recipient's address. I took it to the post office today to get the stamps hand-cancelled: it's on its way to Maine.

I'm not complaining about all those hours and hours of work, though. Not in the least: I loved every minute of it! I'm so happy to have enough energy to do this kind of stuff. I used to be depressed about three days out of four—not big-time painful depression, usually, but draggy and low, especially in the afternoons. But not now! I don't know quite why I've entered into this phase of being a driven artist, but I'm betting that being mostly off carbs, especially 100% free of sugar, has a lot to do with it. I seem to have a brain that functions best on a diet of protein and fat, especially butterfat. The only downside is that it's taken me nearly 60 years to figure that out. Better late than never, I guess.

And of course the other part is finally figuring out what brings me the most joy. I've had a lot of different jobs—everything from legal consultant to brain researcher to sailing instructor to book reviewer—but none of them compare to the nonstop pleasure of being an artist.

Am I losing weight? I have no idea. I've stopped over-indulging on the muesli, and in fact am limiting myself to a quarter cup a day. I apparently need just a little bit of carbs to keep from getting jittery & generally off-kilter, but I refuse to eat any more than absolutely necessary. Only time will tell whether this diet that fuels my brain so well will start melting off the pounds again.

I'm doing my leg exercises every night, and I can really tell because running up and down the stairs is very easy. But I need to pry my hands off the scissors, paper & glue long enough to start walking on a regular basis.

Sorry if I sound a little scattered...I'm doin' so much art, I'm gettin' out of practice at writing. It's great to see the new folks here! Keep posting, y'all, and you'll find this is a very supportive group.

MonteCristo— I've got a similar story: I lost 100 pounds back in 2007-09, then a long & arduous family crisis hit, and I gained it all back plus 20 pounds more. I'm slowly working my way back down, and I'm determined: this time I make it all the way to goal weight. We did it once, we can do it again, right? Right!

We don't seem to have heard from Holly in a while...I hope she soon will escape from that dastardly boss, and be into the pleasurable phase of the year. Maybe she's not posting because she's in transition?

Anyway, I'm wishing everyone well! =big grin=

mb2004
04-08-2014, 10:04 PM
Hey everyone! Im here because After having my son after (a very traumatic birth) I developed late onset Post Partum Depression (It didnt hit till he was about 6 months and it was a huge battle till he was about 9months), along with the post partum depression I went from being 270 (below my pre pregnancy weight!) to 315 the biggest I have EVER been (minus when I was hospitalized for pre-enclampsia, and swelled majorly due to pre enclampsia). I decided I want to be healthy. I want to show my son what a healthy parent looks like. I'm currently at 299. working towards my next goal. I just got word today that I have health insurance once again! Can't wait to go to the doctor and get back on my ADHD meds and talk to him about my goals in losing weight.

IBelieveInMe2
04-09-2014, 09:20 AM
mb2004: :welcome3: to our group! I am sorry that you had to go through post-partum depression and gaining weight. Great news that you have your health insurance back! Hope you will get your ADHD meds soon and be on your way to the weight loss that you desire! So happy you posted. :)

Fi: Sounds like you have been a very busy artist!!! Glad you enjoy it so much. Good for you for doing your leg exercises every night. I hope you will allow yourself the time to get outdoors and walk and enjoy all of those beautiful trees and flowers that you mentioned. You will be glad you did! ;)
I am wondering how Holly is doing also. Hope no news is good news!
Did you ever hear back from lilturtle? I didn't. I am worried about her. Haven't heard from her in a month and a half. :(

I had my appointment with my podiatrist on Monday and he gave me a shot of steroid in my heel for plantar fasciitis. Thursday, I go back to get casted for professional orthotics, which is the "cure." I did the treadmill for 30 minutes last night without much heel pain, so I am excited about that. I like the treadmill much better than the bike. Eating has been pretty good, but there is room for improvement. Exercise has been fairly consistent, but room for improvement there, too. Focusing on progress and not perfection! Hope this post finds everyone feeling renewed and ready to tackle this weight loss thing! Hope to hear from some of the "regulars" soon! Until then, I am sending everyone some :dust: and sunshine! :sunny: WE CAN DO THIS!!! :D

Fiona W
04-09-2014, 11:49 PM
Do y'all know about the importance of inefficiency in weight loss? They've done studies of how fat people go about doing stuff—in the house, in the office—versus how skinny people do the same things. They've documented that fat people tend to be very efficient in their movements: if they need to carry three things from one room to another, they gather up all three things in their arms and move them all in one trip. A skinny person, by contrast, will grab one item and carry it to the next room where it goes, then go back for the second thing and carry it to the other room, and so on.

The same goes for going up and down the stairs to their apartment, or up and down the stairs in their house. The fat people, when documented over time, make fewer trips up and down than the skinny people do. If they're wearing pedometers, the skinny people take many more steps a day than the fat people.

So the next time you're picking up a room, or carrying stuff around the office, or bringing the dishes from the dining room into the kitchen, or moving the laundry from point A to point B, think about doing it inefficiently. The job gets done just the same either way, but if you take more steps, and climb more stairs, and make more trips from your car to where you live, you're living the life of a skinny person—moving about more and burning more calories.

'Sounds counter-intuitive, I know. Why would anyone want to do more work than is necessary? Why would anyone want their chores to take twice as long to accomplish? But just like waiting to eat until you're hungry, instead of eating at defined meal times, if you move inefficiently, you're changing your lifestyle.

I practice this as much as possible, telling myself the job will get done just the same if carrying in the groceries takes six or seven trips, than it will if it takes three trips.

It's a mellow way of doing things, too. Oddly enough, inefficiency is much less stressful. I feel more relaxed as I'm moving about, because I'm not all bothered about getting things done in a hurry. I park as far away from the post office as possible, stretch my legs and work my muscles, before gettin' back in the car to run the next errand. If it's a nice day in the spring, I get more opportunities to appreciate flowering trees, see a bird, interact with a neighbor.

I don't always remember, though: sometimes it seems like the right thing to do to take the elevator instead of the stairs, when I only have to go up one or two floors. But I'm trying...trying to make myself into an inefficient person.

VermontMom
04-11-2014, 07:29 AM
Hello!!! thanks for missing me :) I have been functioning with the basics but not much (any) joy. The deal at work, with the idiot boss/groping customer/no satisfaction from the Civil Rights Unit got me so down. But I know alot worse things have happened to people and i need to get over it. Wrote out a succinct resignation letter and did not mail it...felt good to write it though.

Been bingeing and that is so awful, especially when I thought my mindset was on 'spring' and trying to get weight off, I think I've gained :(

I have only 3 more days of the idiot boss and then I have almost 3 weeks off and then start the good summer job so I have that to look forward to.

:welcome: to the new folks!! this is a very supportive group and it does help to know that some people care. :)

Fi - it is wonderful to hear of your energy and joy when you are creating!

IBelieve - I am glad the steroid shot gave you at least some relief for a while, and best wishes on the orthotics fitting. I am sending :dust: for both (and all) of us!

Ohio - Hi :wave:

1life2liv - congrats!!!! 25 down since January is stupendous :D

IBelieveInMe2
04-12-2014, 05:51 PM
Hello from the lake! :sunny: I am so happy to be back up at the lake for another season, but I forgot how tempting it is to munch constantly up here. I need to work my RESISTANCE muscle often up here! I can do it, though. Just need to have the right foods around..... and stick to those foods! We go to Florida the week after Easter and I am soooooooooooooo much bigger than I wanted to be by now; as in, haven't lost ANY weight (just creeped UP) since I set out to be thinner by Florida. :( I will NOT let it ruin my time, though I will feel like a beached whale in a swimsuit. :o Gotta practice POSITIVE self-talk and work on at least maintaining while in Florida!!! Then, back ON BOARD with weight loss when we return!

Fi: Thank you for sharing about being INeffecient in weight loss. Very interesting perspective! Glad that you are getting so into your art, but please do make time for the outdoors, too! It is so good for your mind and body....... and even your creativity! Hope this post finds you well!

Holly: It is so great to hear from you!!! Sorry that you have been down. Forget about any bingeing and make it through these last few days with the IDIOT boss and you will feel renewed and ready to take on the challenges of weight loss once again! I can't wait for you to start your summer job!!! Enjoy your days off between jobs!!! You most definitely deserve it! :D Thanks for checking in. ;) BTW, have you been out on your bike yet??? :bike:

Waving HELLO to everyone else!!! Please check in when you can! :wave:

1life2liv
04-13-2014, 01:12 AM
Hey everyone!!!! I don't have much for tonight just want to wish everyone well,check in and add an update . I had my weekly weigh in and I am down another pound. I feel like I slacked l bit last week and definitely did today. I don't know why I do this. I always feel so rotten after making a poor diet choice. I started a little bet with a friend with some money involved. We both set small goals and if we both reach our goals the. We just add to the money. If only one person meets the goal, they get the money. I think it will help me stay motivated.


Until next time. Stay awesome, xoxoxoxo

worththeeffort2
04-13-2014, 10:25 AM
OMG, people. I've bought a swimsuit. Actually, I placed an online order today.

Last week, I activated my new, free fitness center membership provided at work under our new employee contract. Prior to this, we were encouraged to use the facility but were expected to pay around $300 for the privilege. That's a week's salary, thank you very much.

Anyway, this week I took the very scary plunge and activated my membership, then scheduled an appointment to learn the equipment. Then, I went back on Friday to workout all on my own. The more times I go, the less scary it will be, I think.

Since I know that swimming laps is a good, low-impact, full-body, cardio workout, I debated with myself about using the lap pool. The first, big scary move was to take my measurements and figure out what size bathing suit to order. I picked out a style yesterday and slept on the idea overnight. This morning, I pulled the trigger and ordered the suit and a pair of women's swim shorts to give me just a little extra coverage.

Once the outfit arrives, I will continue to operate under the premise that, the more times I do it, the less scary it will be but I'm still facing that first frightening moment of putting on the suit and walking out into the public pool area to swim laps. :o You can't truly die of embarrassment, right?

Fiona W
04-13-2014, 01:41 PM
KITTENS!!! The breeder from whom we'll be getting our next pair of oriental shorthair kittens just told me: our kittens were born last night! The litter has one male and three females. Once they're old enough to tell what they're gonna look like, Julie (our breeder) will pick out one of the females for her breeding program. Since I'm first in line to get kittens from her, we'll get the male and our pick of the other two females. Yay!

Colors: in the picture I'm about to link, the two on either end are called red spotted tabbies, and the two darker ones in the middle are red ticked tabbies. The male (I don't know which one he is) is spotted, and I want one of the ticked females. They're only 10 hours old in this picture. (http://oceanstar.com/cherry_newborns--crop.jpg).

Just to give you some idea, here's what a young red spotted tabby oriental (http://www.fotothing.com/photos/c28/c281bba006d4edb5e254d4c5689eebf0_42e.jpg) looks like, and here's a young red ticked tabby oriental (http://www.google.com/search?q=oriental+shorthair+red+ticked+tabby&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=H8FKU-jDBtfMsQS6tYK4Cw&ved=0CDEQ7Ak&biw=768&bih=902#biv=i%7C186;d%7C_ce__Gk4NTwfPM:). The latter is called "ticked" because even though the coat in the picture looks like a solid color, it has darker guard hairs—the "ticking." The eyes for both colors are green.

We love this breed because they're very sociable, affectionate, and playful all their lives. They play fetch, they come when they're called, they're devoted and sensitive like you wouldn't believe...in many ways they're like dogs. They're the polar opposite of an aloof, independent cat. And with a good breeder like ours, they're raised with lots and lots of TLC.

They don't leave the home they were born in, and they don't leave their mother, until 12 weeks of age, so we'll drive to New Jersey to pick them up in mid-July. We did this same thing before, with the same breeder, in 2001, and those cats were fabulous.

And yes, I already have names picked out, but I've gone on too long already...I'm just SO excited!! Since we don't have children, these cats are our kids!

IBelieveInMe2
04-13-2014, 11:11 PM
Hello Everyone!!! We came back home tonight from the lake. I am anxious to get started on a fresh new week of healthy choices!!! I ate pretty well today and we got some walking in over the weekend, so I am on my way!

worththeeffort2: :welcome: to our group! Do I remember you from a post a little while ago, or does your "name" just ring a bell with me? Congrats on taking the plunge and buying a swimsuit (and swim shorts for extra coverage)!!! And for activating your gym membership and following through so far. You are on your way to better health!!! :carrot: HOORAY FOR YOU!!! :D

1life2liv: It is great to hear from you! Thanks for checking in! Congrats on losing another pound!!! Best of luck with your bet and staying motivated! YOU CAN DO IT!!! :D

Fi: Those kittens are adorable!!! Bet you can't wait to have two of them!!! Come on, share your names! I'm listening/reading! :)

Waving HELLO to everyone else! :wave:

VermontMom
04-14-2014, 09:23 PM
worththeeffort2 - :welcome: ! I also applaud you for taking the plunge :D (bad pun huh) about swimming, I think that is great! I also agree that even though the first time might be challenging, each time will be less scary and I bet you'll get such a great workout.

1lifetoliv, CONGRATS on getting rid of a pound! seeing the scale go DOWN instead of up is so great isn't it :) :cheer2:

Fi, congrats on the kittens!!

IBelieve, you and I need to focus on what we want so much...and not get derailed. You are right, that now I am out of the dastardly boss place, I can be much more positive, and just being away from the odors of deli/bakery food has already helped, I am not 'starving' feeling all day because I'm getting aroused :D

I have almost 3 weeks off! :carrot: Because the dastardly boss and wife close the store for over 2 weeks, that means I can file for some unemployment benefits, and then there is one more week before my return to work date at the fun summer job.

I have been pretty 'blah' for the past few weeks, not excited about summer job or even my motorcycle...just had to get out from the jerk boss and I think I just physically don't come alive til mid-to-late April and definitely having the snow go away is helping! though we still have snow in the lower reaches of the yard, and the driveway is a mud pit..the bikes have to wait til the driveway firms up.

I have to work on my dinner portion being reasonable; not eating anything after dinner; and not be bothered by my spouse eating dessert or seeing what he has in the daytime by the wrappers and crumbs in his car. That sounds awful but I am worried about our life together. that is a big deep thing for me to reveal.

So :wave: to you all and :hug: and I WILL be here more!! :D

ohiofreespirit
04-14-2014, 09:44 PM
Hello ladies,

I am doing well. My mood is good. School is good, next session I go to 2 classes. Business and math, it should be interesting. I take math in person and business online. I am very excited!!!!!!!

It is so good to see everyone and to all the new girls welcome to the thread.

Holly, it's great to see you. I'm sorry you have the blahs though. That sucks.

IBelieveInMe2, Congrats on walking. That is awesome.

Fi, congrats on the kittens!!!!!!!! wooooo hoooooo

Worththeeffort2, congrats on the new swim suit!!!!!! I have a new one too. I can't wait to wear it this summer. Maybe new summers will be smaller????

1life2liv, congrats on losing a pound. yay!!!!!!!! It's always great to see the scale go down. That is awesome.


Much love to everyone.

1life2liv
04-15-2014, 12:07 AM
hey everyone!!! So yesterday my small dog bit my daughter. she drew blood and left about 6 puncture holes in her face. the bite is located right by the eye, too close. so long story short I have been under so much pressure and stress trying to figure out what to do with her. do we put her down, keep her, or have her adopted? anyways when this happened the first thing I caught myself doing was shoving something in my mouth!!! of course!!!I talked my self down from that before I had way overdone it. THEN I felt guilty for eating so I immediately had a thought of wanting to purge. OMG!!!! THIS CANNOT BE HAPPENING! I have not had thoughts of purging in forever. it almost killed me before. not to mention I now have issues with my teeth, taste buds, stomach lining, and throat because of it. All I can think is how stupid am I for even thinking about doing that again!!!I didn't end up doing it but it still really bothers me that those thoughts are creeping up. ok enough with the griping!!

worththeeffort2- good to meet you and have you in the forum!! Congrats on taking soooo many chances. At this rate you are going to make leaps and bounds in getting healthy and losing weight!! WAY TO GO!!!!

Fiona- congrats on your new kittens being born!!! animals are at times a lot of work but totally worth it if you ask me!!

ibelieveinme2- glad your back from the lake safe and sound (: we camp everyother weekend during the summer months. I have not been camping while on a diet. I think it may be very difficult because we go with several other people and there is constantly a buffet table full of food sitting out. and trust me its not healthy food either! I think this year I will make sure to take plenty of healthy options for my self and instead of hanging out at the campsite next to the food the majority of the time, I will get out and be active by fishing, hiking, swimming (maybe), and taking my daughter to the park. anyways way to go on making healthy choices!!

Vermontmom- sorry your a little down right now! here in Kansas the weather keeps going from one extreme to the other. today it was 35 degrees and two days ago it was 84!!! my depression and mood do not like this type of weather. also on the bike subject.... I have now been banned by my father and husband from every riding a motorcycle again because just about every time I get on the back of one, I fall asleep. FOR REAL!!!! it happens in cars, on boats, anything with a rumbling engine. anyways thought you might enjoy hearing that. lastly I am the same. I want my husband and I to both be healthy and active!! we have been together for 5 years and he has only gained 10 pounds in that time. I on the other hand have gained about 100 pounds. It makes me sick lol. he has always been a little over weight though. but he deffinately has some toning and general exercise that he could be doing. what makes it even worse is that he has a degree in health and exercise science and chooses not to utilize it to his advantage. but we cant let the choices and lifestyle of others interfere with our own success.

ohiofreespirit- I glad to hear you are doing well!!I was a business major for a while. Actually thinking about it, I have been just about every major at one time or another. Anyways I enjoyed business classes and hope you do too!! MATH on the other hand, OH BOY!! Not my best subject. put it this way , I'm 229 pounds and would get a better grade in running a marathon than I would in math, especially algebra lol. Good luck to you though!!!

well folks that's all ive got for tonight. until next time, stay awesome, xoxoxox

Fiona W
04-15-2014, 12:01 PM
Thanks, y'all, for wanting to know the kittens' names. The boy is Oscar—for Oscar Wilde, one of my favorite writers and definitely the person in history I would most like to meet. The girl is Nénu (pronounced "nay-noo")—short for "nénuphar," the French word for water lily, which is a loan word from Arabic. I love water lilies and lotuses of all kinds.

I'm having a rough time of it, depression-wise, because one of my medications didn't get refilled by mail-order as it was supposed to have been. The government has done a lousy job of handling Bob's transition to disability retirement: they owe us tens of thousands of dollars, and now our health insurance and pharmacy claims are screwed up. I'm more upset about all this than I should be, because I've been without that medication for two days, waiting for our local pharmacy to get it in stock.

Last night I overindulged on muesli. I'm really worried that I'm not losing weight, because I don't feel like I'm getting smaller, but I won't know for sure until my weigh-in on the 22nd. But other than last night, I'm on plan for my food, and I'm doing my 600 leg lifts every night.

I'm sorry I can't do personals. I feel really crappy, and when I go to pick up my medication at the Co-op, I'll have to grocery shop, too, since I'm out of some regular items. I hate doing anything out of the house, like grocery shopping, when I feel so bad, but I have no choice. =sigh=

VermontMom
04-15-2014, 12:55 PM
hey everyone!!! So yesterday my small dog bit my daughter. she drew blood and left about 6 puncture holes in her face. the bite is located right by the eye, too close. so long story short I have been under so much pressure and stress trying to figure out what to do with her. do we put her down, keep her, or have her adopted?

OMG that must have been so scary!! :( How is your daughter doing, after the initial shock, is she old enough to 'forgive' your dog? I would hope that it being a once in a lifetime occurrance (or have there been close calls?) that maybe there were factors that instigated it, or do you think your dog just lost it for no reason? I want to hope that you don't have to have her adopted, but I myself would choose giving her away over the final ultimatum..wishing you strength to deal with this!!

and I love how you end your posts, telling us to stay awesome :D

You are not the only one to fall asleep on the back of a motorcycle!! I have done that..and I know at least one other biking lady who rides her own but has also fallen asleep behind her husband. But it doesn't make it any safer does it! Short from bungee-ing oneself to the seat or to the rider, it is serious because we're not in control when asleep..

Ohio, congrats on doing well in school and feeling good about it! :carrot: Will your daughter come home from college soon?

well I did very well on eating yesterday, healthy food and correct portions, one day down, and hope I can do the same today..and the next..and the next... :D

I have had times in my life where the depression is really bad, when I was suicidal, thank goodness I haven't had that in a long time, but I think I just might be the kind of personality that can so very easily, slip into negative thinking/apathy and I find that if I FORCE myself to just do something, literally get up, i can kinda propel myself into activity. Definitely the 'fake it til you make it' deal. But if it works, it works.

I know I've touted this website before but I really like their workouts, www.fitnessblender.com I find them on youtube through our TV. I've also been doing Jillian Michaels' Banish Fat Boost Metabolism workout.

HI :wave: to everyone and as 1life2liv says, keep being awesome :D

VermontMom
04-15-2014, 01:08 PM
I'm having a rough time of it, depression-wise, because one of my medications didn't get refilled by mail-order as it was supposed to have been. The government has done a lousy job of handling Bob's transition to disability retirement: they owe us tens of thousands of dollars, and now our health insurance and pharmacy claims are screwed up. I'm more upset about all this than I should be, because I've been without that medication for two days, waiting for our local pharmacy to get it in stock.


that's crummy!! sure hope they clear that up SOON! and :hug: for getting through the rough time.

worththeeffort2
04-15-2014, 08:55 PM
Thanks for the welcome, everyone. I've started my Tuesday/Thursday schedule of going to the gym after work. After a 45-minute workout, I chugged a bottle of water and headed for home. Leaving the gym, I walked smack into a wall of grilled beef and fried onions smell from the dining commons across the road from the gym. It was mouth-watering but I simply enjoyed the delicious smell, knowing it wouldn't taste as good as it smelled, anyway. :) No calories wasted there. Stuck to my program but I really do need to do better at eating vegetables.

projectjudi
04-16-2014, 08:12 AM
Hi everyone!
Hope it's ok for me to join this thread.
I am bipolar but have more downs than ups. Right now my meds are keeping me pretty stable (for the first time in 25 years)
I have lost quite a bit of weight over the past 7 years but not in a healthy way. Starving then binging Starving and binging and repeat.
I joined weight watchers several months ago and it has worked for me although it has been slow.
I look forward to joining this thread!
hugs Judi

IBelieveInMe2
04-16-2014, 09:27 AM
Wow, lots of activity here in the past few days! I love it!!! I am pretty much back on board with healthy eating and portions, but haven't exercised for several days. Getting ready to go on Spring Break vacation. Not sure if I'll be in touch via the internet, so please forgive me if I can't post until the 26th, and please everyone else, keep posting and supporting one another!

1life2liv: How SCARY about your dog biting your daughter on the face!!! :( So sorry that happened!!! I, too, would opt for adoption over euthanasia. Maybe the dog needs to be in a home without children. What does your vet say? Is your daughter okay? Understandable that you found some comfort in food. Good for you for talking yourself down before way overdoing it! I can imagine how uncomfortable that must have been to have thoughts of purging, but the important thing to focus on is that you did NOT purge, even under pressure. Maybe journal about the whole situation to help yourself "debrief." Good luck with everything! BIG HUGS :hug: to you!!!

Holly: Sorry you have felt blah the past couple weeks. That is no fun! I hope you get your energy and spirit back soon, "Cupcake!" ;) Yes, we both need to work on keeping our focus on the positive and making healthy choices in order to get to what we truly want ~ a slimmer and trimmer body! WE CAN DO IT!!! :D I hope you will thoroughly ENJOY your 3 weeks off before you start your summer job!

ohiofreespirit: Happy to hear that you are excited about school and that your mood is good! Best of luck juggling both Business and Math! It is kind of nice that you will have one class in person and one online. Keeps it interesting!

Fi: Love the names Oscar and Nenu and your reasons for both! Can't wait until you can hold your sweet kittens!!! So sorry that your meds got screwed up and you are having a rough time of it depression-wise. That should not have happened with your meds! I can understand your frustration and irritation. I hope you are back on meds and feeling better by the time you read this post. Hang in there! BiG HUGS :hug: to you!

worththeeffort2: Good for you for getting your gym schedule started!!! YOU ARE DOING IT!!! WooHoo!!! :carrot: Are you swimming in your new swimsuit?!? ;) Good luck on getting in those veggies!

projectjudi: Of course it's okay for you to join the group!!! :welcome: We are happy to have you here with us! That's a bummer that you have more downs than ups, but glad to hear that your meds are keeping you pretty stable at the moment. Good for you for joining Weight Watchers. Remember, slow and steady wins the race! Slow weight loss has the best chance of staying off, so you are doing well! Focus on the POSITIVE!!! :)

Hey, Chelsea and Trish and shr1nk1ngme, are you gals still around?!? I hope you are at least reading along. If so, please post and let us know how things are going for you! We care! ;)

MonteCristo
04-16-2014, 11:33 AM
Hi everyone. Things have been going pretty well for me lately. On my medicine, mood staying pretty level (have bitten anyone's head off). Haven't lost any weight this week, but that was expected. Starting tomorrow I'm going off sugar for 30 days to try and "reset" myself...I been drinking too many sodas (sugar free ones set off my anxiety) and eating other sweet things, and I haven't had much luck in just cutting back, so I thought I'd try this. Have a nice 3 day weekend to get through the initial cravings.

1life2live - Wow, having your dog bite your daughter must have been terrifying. And now having to decide what course of action to take...you have my sympathy.

FI - Cute names for your new cats. I love cats, mine have been a huge blessing to me...and they can always tell when I need snuggles. That is terrible about your medicine. My insurance company had some kind of major snafu a while back and I got a total run around from the pharmacy / insurance company / doctor for 6 weeks while waiting for them to let me have my prescription. I mean seriously, I take this medication so I don't loose my temper and punch someone in the face, and they give me the run around for 6 weeks? It was not a pretty picture. They eventually fixed it after I planted myself in my doctors waiting room and pretty much had a complete meltdown. Hope things go much smoother for you.

projectjudi - I'm fairly new myself, but welcome!

I'm terrible about personals, but HI! to everyone else. I may not always remember to speak to you directly all the time, but I read your posts, and it is comforting just to know others are going through the same things.

VermontMom
04-16-2014, 12:30 PM
but we cant let the choices and lifestyle of others interfere with our own success.


This really resonated with me! I've been using the excuse of 'well my husband doesn't even try to limit his desires' because he will bring home ice cream, or other bad treats.

I have been holding this in for a long time. My email is completely open to him so I don't write about this because I don't want to hurt his feelings or have him get defensive but I don't know what to do.

thanks for the vent opportunity.

VermontMom
04-16-2014, 12:33 PM
Hi everyone.

Hi and :welcome:

'sokay at not doing personals, everyone does what they can and we just hang together :)

best wishes at kicking sugar!! I went without for about 2 weeks last year and that was quite an accomplishment for me.

VermontMom
04-16-2014, 12:36 PM
Wow, lots of activity here in the past few days! I love it!!! I am pretty much back on board with healthy eating and portions, but haven't exercised for several days. Getting ready to go on Spring Break vacation. Not sure if I'll be in touch via the internet, so please forgive me if I can't post until the 26th, and please everyone else, keep posting and supporting one another!)

congrats on getting back on board with healthy food and portions!! Work the exercise in when you can. I will try to be as good as you, here, with posting and encouraging, if you can't check in :)

VermontMom
04-16-2014, 12:37 PM
Hi everyone!
Hope it's ok for me to join this thread.
I am bipolar but have more downs than ups. Right now my meds are keeping me pretty stable (for the first time in 25 years)
I have lost quite a bit of weight over the past 7 years but not in a healthy way. Starving then binging Starving and binging and repeat.
I joined weight watchers several months ago and it has worked for me although it has been slow.
I look forward to joining this thread!
hugs Judi

Hi and :welcome: and of course, you are welcome here. Also sorry about more downs than ups..hope your moods can keep at pretty stable :)

VermontMom
04-16-2014, 12:40 PM
Thanks for the welcome, everyone. I've started my Tuesday/Thursday schedule of going to the gym after work. After a 45-minute workout, I chugged a bottle of water and headed for home. Leaving the gym, I walked smack into a wall of grilled beef and fried onions smell from the dining commons across the road from the gym. It was mouth-watering but I simply enjoyed the delicious smell, knowing it wouldn't taste as good as it smelled, anyway. :) No calories wasted there. Stuck to my program but I really do need to do better at eating vegetables.

congrats at starting your workout routine! AND for drinking water...AND for ignoring the wafting temptation !

IBelieveInMe2
04-17-2014, 01:07 AM
Hello Support Buddies! This morning when I stepped on the scale, I showed a 2.5 pound weight loss!!!!! :carrot: I am soooooooooooooo excited because I think it might be due to the thyroid med I began earlier in the month. Oh how happy I would be if I could begin losing weight consistently again!!! :D

MonteCristo: Great to hear from you again! Best of luck to you going off sugar for 30 days! Hope it helps.

Holly: Thank you for being willing to help "hold down the fort" while I am away. I leave early Friday morning and will return the 25th. I think hubby is taking his computer, so I might touch base while gone, but not sure. Regardless, I will be thinking about everyone and wishing you all well! I will do my best to make healthy choices and get lots of walking (on the beach!) in! But I am also not going to be too hard on myself if I slip. It IS vacation, after all! But I am excited about this little weight loss and hope to keep the trend going DOWNWARD!!!

Hello :wave: to everyone else! 1life2liv, I hope your daughter is okay!!! :hug:

worththeeffort2
04-17-2014, 06:23 AM
Back to the gym today for me. Thanks for the encouragement, everyone. I really appreciate it. The swimsuit has not arrived in the mail, yet. It should be here--maybe Saturday? I'm not sure. I'm hoping it fits properly and, if so, I may add a third day to my workout schedule in order to add swimming without taking away from my strength training.

My doctor recommended I use the rowing machine, which I have been doing but I'm finding it is one of the most boring pieces of exercise equipment I've ever touched. Think of what it would be like to be sitting on your butt, trying to start a giant, pull-start lawn mower without spark plugs. Endless cranking without even the frustrating engine sputter that drives you to pull again. Thank heavens for my iPod Shuffle. I'm up to 15 minutes, which is about 2800m of rowing for me, according to the machine's readout. The trainer recommended I do no less than 3000m each session, once I work up to that point. I do think I'll need to get a pair of workout gloves to protect the inside of my knuckles from fiction against the pull bar.

I have a cute story to share. When I got home from work last night, my husband gave me a big hug and a squeeze. I was hugging him and rubbing his back, enjoying the attention when I realized he was quietly testing to see if I've lost enough weight that he can make his hands touch behind my back! ;) That made me smile because he never said a word. Soon! Just give me a few more months, sweetheart! :lol:

Have a wonderful day, everyone.

worththeeffort2
04-17-2014, 06:27 AM
This morning when I stepped on the scale, I showed a 2.5 pound weight loss!!!!! :carrot: I am soooooooooooooo excited because I think it might be due to the thyroid med I began earlier in the month. Oh how happy I would be if I could begin losing weight consistently again!!! :D

:congrat: That is exciting! Good job, and have a wonderful Spring Break vacation. Hope you get to do lots of fun, active stuff!

VermontMom
04-17-2014, 08:01 AM
one of the most boring pieces of exercise equipment I've ever touched. Think of what it would be like to be sitting on your butt, trying to start a giant, pull-start lawn mower without spark plugs. Endless cranking without even the frustrating engine sputter that drives you to pull again. Thank heavens for my iPod Shuffle.

LOL great description :D pull to that music! I agree gloves would be good to protect your hands. If I had a cardio/strength machine at home I guess I would force myself to use it, but I would also need to be driven by music. I do search out vids that use bodyweight exercises for my cardio.


Hello Support Buddies! This morning when I stepped on the scale, I showed a 2.5 pound weight loss!!!!! :carrot: I am soooooooooooooo excited because I think it might be due to the thyroid med I began earlier in the month. Oh how happy I would be if I could begin losing weight consistently again!!! :D

CONGRATS!! :cheer2: YAY you! :D

I am also optimistic, I changed my ticker 2# down, it might be water weight as I've only 'buckled down" on my eating for about 4 days...but I'll take it!! It is SO encouraging isn't it!!

HI :wave: to everyone else :)

I am cautiously optimistic that my funk might be over. I have gotten out of bed at a reasonable time and not gone back to bed for a few days in a row..and I find myself looking forward to the day, or the next day, as opposed to 'meh, whatever'.

Fiona W
04-17-2014, 09:48 AM
Well I had to charge an ungodly amount of money on our credit card for only a month's supply, because we are temporarily without pharmacy coverage, but I finally got my meds and am feeling like myself again. I sure hope we get reimbursed...jeez...

Thanks, y'all, for the nice words about the kitten names. I'm pretty stressed out about the big change that will be coming up in July, when Bob and I will be parents of felines again. The house has to be absolutely squared away and spic-n-span before the wee ones arrive, and there's a WHOLE lot to do. I won't be making many collages for a while! One of the things I learned in med school that has really stuck with me over the years is that positive stressors, like new fur-kids to love, are just as hard on one's body and mind as the negative stressors we usually think of when we think about stress.

I had something happen yesterday that almost brought me to tears: all of a sudden, totally out of the blue, my beloved iPad2 has a crack in it—right down the middle, all the way from top to bottom. It doesn't alter the images very much, but it's most unsettling, because I was handling it with the same TLC I always do. I have no idea how it happened. Ever since my iPad2 arrived in the mail on April 14, 2011 (you see I remember the exact date), it's been my ever-present companion, basically surgically attached to me from dawn 'til midnight. I only use my laptop for scanning art & letters and uploading my collages: everything else, including reading books, writing the rough draft of a novel, painting portraits of our last pair of cats, learning French, and so much more, I do on the iPad2. I wouldn't even want an upgrade if someone gave it to me for free, because the subsequent iPads weigh a good bit more. So I hope this crack isn't the beginning of the end of what has been a lovely relationship...

Holly— Good job on starting to pull yourself out of your funk! "Fake it until you make it" is the attitude I embrace when I force myself to smile sometimes, just because exercising those side-of-the-mouth muscles is good for one's overall perspective. Just think about how much better things will be soon when you're doin' your fun job! And I agree: it makes a big difference when you get to change your ticker.

worththeeffort2— How great to hear that you've got yourself started on the rowing machines! And I really look forward to hearin' about that new swimsuit when it arrives, and the first time you get to use it.

Kathleen— All righty then about the 2.5 pounds!! And way to go on eating smaller portions: are you using a smaller plate than the rest of the family? I find it makes a big difference to me to use a luncheon-size plate rather than a full-size dinner plate, because then I can load up my plate and clean it entirely. Don't have a luncheon-size plate? Get a nice one, just for you: you're worth it, girl! I just ordered a small pottery dessert bowl to have my daily muesli in, to keep myself from being tempted to overindulge. Where are you going on your spring break vacation? Do tell...

MonteCristo— Great idea about going off sugar for 30 days! I think you'll find it makes a big difference in your energy levels. The last time I had any sugar was one dark chocolate bar on my birthday in late February, and I feel terrific!

projectjudi— Welcome on board the Ups & Downs thread! This is a very supportive crew: post every day if you possibly can, and you'll feel the love. I, too, am bipolar with lots more downs than ups, and I've also had problems with binge behavior. But I've been 100% binge free since last fall, thanks to a fabulous book, Kathryn Hansen's Brain Over Binge (http://www.amazon.com/Brain-over-Binge-Conventional-Recovered/dp/0984481702/). Her website is also very useful: Kathryn posted my own story about how I've used her book in the followup to the "Tips for Beginners" section. Google "brain over binge blog" and check it out.

ohiofreespirit— It's really inspiring to read about how you're doing in school. Keep up with the great work!

1life2liv— Gosh, what a difficult decision to make about your biting dog! I hope things work out OK. I love your overall attitude, and get a lot out of reading your postings!

I hope not many of y'all are having to deal with temptations from Easter candy. Remember, if you have to indulge, it's far better to plan in advance for one dark chocolate item or the like, then take the time to savor every bite. Eating dyed hard-boiled eggs is also a way to go: healthy, and no sugar!

VermontMom
04-17-2014, 12:03 PM
"fur-kids" :lol: but sorry to hear of that crack! I sure hope it doesn't progress or do damage to your CC! (Constant Companion :D ) and very glad to hear you got your meds, though at a high cost >:(

I agree what a good idea, for us to have smaller plates/bowls. I have little sherbet-type glass bowls, well they were what everyone used about 50 years ago :rolleyes: but now seem tiny, but that's what I have my yogurt, or sugar-free treat, in..and I eat that with a tiny long-handled baby spoon :D

Instead of starting a April Exercise thread so late in the month, maybe I'll just post here daily what I've done for exercise...today was a www.fitnessblender.com workouts, a Core/Cardio HIIT workout, 40 minutes. It made me sweat in a cold room so I know I worked hard :D

IBelieveInMe2
04-17-2014, 08:27 PM
This will be my last post until possibly the 25th, as we leave for vacation in the morning. Please keep posting and supporting each other, everyone! We have a GREAT group going here! :hug: I will so miss my pups (3 dogs), but thankfully they will be comfy in our home with a dogsitter and good friend of the family! She loves the pups, too, so all is good! :D Fi, we are going to Marco Island, Florida for Spring Break. :sunny: We have been there before, but not since the kids were little. I can't wait! My hubby really needs a break from the stress at his job. It will be fun to have some special family time. My dad has always called vacations "an investment in memories," and that is how I look at them. One of my nieces is getting married on the beach on Easter Monday, and we will be joining them at the small private ceremony. Looking forward to making new memories this year! :)

Wishing all of you a very :easter2:

VermontMom
04-17-2014, 09:22 PM
This will be my last post until possibly the 25th, as we leave for vacation in the morning. Please keep posting and supporting each other, everyone! We have a GREAT group going here! :hug: I will so miss my pups (3 dogs), but thankfully they will be comfy in our home with a dogsitter and good friend of the family! She loves the pups, too, so all is good! :D Fi, we are going to Marco Island, Florida for Spring Break. :sunny: We have been there before, but not since the kids were little. I can't wait! My hubby really needs a break from the stress at his job. It will be fun to have some special family time. My dad has always called vacations "an investment in memories," and that is how I look at them. One of my nieces is getting married on the beach on Easter Monday, and we will be joining them at the small private ceremony. Looking forward to making new memories this year! :)

Wishing all of you a very :easter2:

that sounds wonderful!! and so glad your doggies will be happy at home with a family friend. Enjoy the sun and warmth, girlfriend! :hug:

VermontMom
04-18-2014, 03:05 PM
good afternoon chicks :) I am happy to report that I am happy! OMG isn't that such a simple thing but such a huge thing. Even though I am dusty / dirty / tired (I am cleaning out a junked van that has been in our driveway for flippin years and I decided today is the day!)

This is the exercise I did this morning, plus about 6 minutes of Cathe abwork.

http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/workout-detail/Fat-Burning-Cardio-Workout-37-Minute-Fitness-Blender-Cardio-Workout-at-Home/fg/

Today is my FIFTH day in a row staying on plan!! whereas before I could not stay ONE day on plan. I'm on the change for good honeymoon :D

HI to everyone and say hello back :)

lilturtle
04-18-2014, 05:53 PM
Hi everyone! I'm back. I got sidetracked with my posting but not with my dieting. I need to update my ticker. I am down and out of the 4s. I'm going to keep up with you guys now. No more long breaks.

VermontMom
04-18-2014, 06:20 PM
Hi everyone! I'm back. I got sidetracked with my posting but not with my dieting. I need to update my ticker. I am down and out of the 4s. I'm going to keep up with you guys now. No more long breaks.

:cheer2: !! That is awesome lilturtle! about being down and about being here :D

ohiofreespirit
04-18-2014, 10:01 PM
Hello ladies,

I hope this post finds you all well.


Jennifer is home for a few days for Easter, she has to go back on Sunday. I am so glad to have her here with me.


School is going pretty well. I will wait until I get my final grade to tell you what I wind up with. I am enjoying my class. My next session I have a math and business classes to tackle.

lilturtle, it is great to see you back posting again.

Holly, hi sweetie, good to see you, as well.


IBelieve, hope you had a great time on your vacation.

Fi, sorry about your i-pad.


I had a birthday back on the 7th of April, i turned 47. I did not have a good birthday this year.


Much love to all.

VermontMom
04-18-2014, 10:06 PM
I had a birthday back on the 7th of April, i turned 47. I did not have a good birthday this year.


aw, Happy Belated!! and sorry it was not a good birthday this year, sometimes they suck, sometimes they're great. Hopefully this means 48 will be GREAT :D

Fiona W
04-19-2014, 01:16 AM
Thanks for the concern about ny iPad, y'all, but I'm not sweating about it. The crack really doesn't change the images hardly at all, and it's functioning just fine.

Yesterday I felt really stessed out and overwhelmed by the disaster area that is our house. Every time I tried to focus on dealing with just one pile of stuff, I'd keep being distracted by all the other piles. And I've been feeling kind of like a plant uprooted from its comfy bed: instead of reading, writing, and making art, I have to get the house in shape before the kittens arrive in July. I've been calling this long-postponed endeavor the BERP, for Big Entropy Reduction Project. So if you hear me talking about the BERP, you'll know what I'm talking about. The whole BERP, which will take at least several weeks to complete, has to be finished before Bob and I can pitch in together to actually clean the house.

Today went much better, though, I've been steadily working on "clipping" magazines and catalogs. When I "clip" a magazine, it means I go through it page by page with scissors in hand, and clip out any images, or even just areas of pattern or color, that I may be able to use in collage. I put the clippings in low, open-topped boxes, and eventually take the boxes up to my collage room and sort the clippings into other boxes in categories like people, animals, landscapes, etc. It's a process that eats up a lot of time, but there's no other way for me to tackle the piles of paper that are choking our space, and toss 99% of it into the recycle bin. At least I get to think about collage when I'm doing it, and I like the feeling of creating order out of chaos.

Trish— It's wonderful to see you back on the thread! I missed you, girl. Major congratulations on being into the 300s: that's terrific news!

ohiofreespirit— Belated Happy Birthday! I wish you had told us earlier—'sorry to hear it wasn't a very good day.

Holly— Way to go! It sounds like you've got a real streak going of consecutive on-plan days. And it's fantastic to hear your mood has improved!

MonteCristo
04-19-2014, 08:47 AM
Hi all. Loving the energy right now, so upbeat.

Still no weight loss (stupid TOM), but I have 2 days of my 30 sugar free days under my belt. So far no hideous cravings, but I did have a spectacular headache yesterday, but thankfully a couple of exec drink knocked it out. I even did some long overdue yard work yesterday, mulching my leaves into the front yard (I have a weird thing about not raking feels like I am stealing nutrients from my yard). Even trotted out my blower and made everything look pretty after. Gave me a much better feeling than my usual sitting around. :)

worththeeffort2
04-19-2014, 10:03 AM
Well, if the worst thing that happens to me all weekend is sneezing when I have a mouthful of chewed up protein bar, it should be a pretty decent weekend. Starting my new strength training routine has helped me work off two more pounds this week. Yay! I'm focusing on cardio this weekend. Still waiting for the arrival of the swimsuit in the mail. When I wear it the first time at the gym, I'm mentally bringing all of you with me for support. :D

Holly, it's so great to know you had a happy day yesterday and were feeling good. I hope it spreads throughout the weekend for everyone on the forum.

lilturtle, way to go. Keep up the fantastic work. You're doing great.

Ohio, Happy Belated Birthday. If you didn't do something special for yourself on your day, do something special for yourself today!

Fiona, just keep chipping away at the piles and don't feel discouraged. When my brain is scattered and I'm facing a project that feels overwhelming, I stop and make myself a list of even the most obvious steps that I need to take. That way, I can stay focused by referring back to the list, crossing things off, then moving on to the next task on the list. That way, when I've finished the list, I feel a sense of accomplishment.

Have an absolutely spectacular weekend, everyone!

VermontMom
04-19-2014, 12:38 PM
Yesterday I felt really stessed out and overwhelmed by the disaster area that is our house. .......

Today went much better, though, I've been steadily working on "clipping" magazines and catalogs.

sorry you had an overwhelmed day..and then the next day you made progress!

Hi all. Loving the energy right now, so upbeat.

Still no weight loss (stupid TOM), but I have 2 days of my 30 sugar free days under my belt.

CONGRATS :cheer2: on 2 full days of no flippin' sugar! :) and yay for the yard work! must look really nice. I bet your lawn loves your for your leafy mulch :D

Well, if the worst thing that happens to me all weekend is sneezing when I have a mouthful of chewed up protein bar, it should be a pretty decent weekend. Starting my new strength training routine has helped me work off two more pounds this week. Yay!

LOL at the sneezed-out protein bar :rofl: and WTG (way to go) on 2 pounds GONE!
do you have the protein bar as a meal substitute, or work it in as a snack? I tried a Clif Chocolate mint protein bar, 270 calories, so I made it my lunch, not sure if I should do that much though.

I just did this workout for my exercise today - http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/workout-detail/Comprehensive-Total-Body-HIIT-Cardio-and-Core-Workout/dq/ It... was...brutal! This 53 year-old had to adapt alot of the high impact moves, and the 'star jumps'?? you gotta be kiddin me :D I did my best though, and had to tissue off the sweat from running in my eyes (in a cool room, 62 degrees, with a fan on!)

I might come back later this afternoon to chat :) What a difference in my mood..all for the better!

lilturtle
04-19-2014, 12:56 PM
ohiofreespirit - Happy belated. Mine was March 7th. It was a struggle for me too this year.

Thanks everyone for the support and welcome. I'm going to try and post every day even if I have nothing to say. I need to stay connected. I am reading along with everyone too. I'm going to Florida next month to visit my mom for a few weeks. I had to get two plane tickets. Talk about embarrassing. I haven't flown since I was 10 so I am kind of nervous. More so of the airport then the actual flight itself. I don't like new places and I don't know my way around. I will be alone too. I usually take the train but my mom is paying so she gets to pick my mode of transportation. We are driving back.

Tomorrow is Easter. I will be with my family here in Pennsylvania. My stepmom usually makes peanut butter egss and gives me a gallon sized ziplock bag of them. I hope she doesn't this year. I also get other candy. It's going to be hard to turn down candy. I have been eating a lot of pickles and carrots and keeping my calories under 1000 each day. Sometimes under 500. I went through a period of not wanting to eat. I have my heart set on being down 40 more lbs by the end of June when I go back to the doctor. That is about 13lbs a month. It's hard to tell if I am making any progress. But I am hanging in there.

worththeeffort2
04-19-2014, 01:02 PM
do you have the protein bar as a meal substitute, or work it in as a snack? I tried a Clif Chocolate mint protein bar, 270 calories, so I made it my lunch, not sure if I should do that much though.

It is a meal replacement. I'm doing a medically supervised weight loss program, so I'm in ketosis. I'm using Nutrimed bars, which are prescribed and have 15g of protein @ 160 calories. Although you need a prescription for this particular brand, a comparable bar is available through bariatricchoice.com. They are called WonderSlim meal replacement bars on that site. Look up item# WS114, if you're curious. And, yes, they are expensive but really no more so than a Clif bar and they replace other foods, so it balances out in the end.

And, yes, it was the graham protein bar that I sneezed. It stings to do that, so I recommend against it.

My doctor allows me to eat as much celery, lettuce, and cucumber as I want, so if I'm feeling really hungry, I can have a protein bar AND a rather dull salad of lettuce, celery, and cucumber with fat-free dressing. I usually just sprinkle it with red wine vinegar and some salt and pepper. The salad provides bulk and something to chew. The protein provides something that is filling and takes time to digest. Since I eat every three hours between 6 a.m. and 6 p.m., I don't typically get physically hungry on the program. The challenge is the psychological "hunger" but I'm using Fiona's favorite book, Brain over Binge to change my habits.

Well, my lunch break is done. I just finished 30 minutes on the elliptical. For the first time since buying the stupid machine, I did 30 minutes straight without having to get off for a break every 10 to 15 minutes. Plus, I upped the level of the workout two notches. Endorphin high! :dizzy:

ohiofreespirit
04-19-2014, 01:11 PM
Hi ladies,

I turned in my big project for my class today, it wasn't due until next week but I had it done so figured might as well turn it in. Pretty much done with my class.:cp: On May 5th, I have 2 classes to take. :(


I hope you all are well. I will check back in again soon. Until then, much love to all.

lilturtle
04-19-2014, 03:59 PM
worththeeffort2 - I am going to look into trying some of those protien bars. I have not been eating healthy. Thanks for the tip.

seabiscuit
04-19-2014, 05:22 PM
Hi there!

I'm sorry I haven't posted for awhile, I am about to move and I have been busy!!

I miss all of you! How are all of you? How are you Holly and Ohiofreespirit?

I'm currently in NYC visiting family for Easter and I am having an awesome time! Today my Mom and I saw a Broadway play called A Gentleman's Guide to Love and Murder. It was wonderful, so engaging and funny. Tonight I am having dinner with my Dad and his wife, and my brother. I love NYC, and I saw a friend for lunch today, that was a lot of fun. I leave on Monday to go back to PA.

I got my hair colored and cut on Thursday, I really love how it came out! I had been looking for a new stylist and I found a great one! When I look good, I feel great!

I'm actually considering going to school for cosmetology, I think I would really enjoy that!

I just started working with a new therapist, he is very nice.

Take care and Happy Easter!!!

Amy ;)

projectjudi
04-19-2014, 10:20 PM
Thanks for the warm welcome.
Fi I checked out the site you recommended and am trying to track down the book in Canada.
What you wrote on the site was very well articulated and made me really want to get it ASAP

projectjudi
04-19-2014, 10:33 PM
I hate myself so much today! My mood is so low and I am totally disgusted with myself.
I have gone 5 months without binging and since Tuesday have done nothing but eat. I feel like **** physically and mentally. I was doing so well. I can't believe what a loser I am.
I'm so all or nothing and obsessive. I really thought that when I started eating healthy after all the years of starving myself that the binge eating would stop. Wrong! Have been in tears since this started but does that stop me?? What is wrong with me?
I went to the book store today looking for Brain over Binge but they don't have it and can't order it in Canada. Bought 3 books on EDs but am not in the right mental state to read them.
Sorry for being so negative. Not trying to bring anyone down...just needed to vent

Chubbie Chick
04-20-2014, 12:51 AM
KITTENS!!! The breeder from whom we'll be getting our next pair of oriental shorthair kittens just told me: our kittens were born last night! The litter has one male and three females. Once they're old enough to tell what they're gonna look like, Julie (our breeder) will pick out one of the females for her breeding program. Since I'm first in line to get kittens from her, we'll get the male and our pick of the other two females. Yay!

Colors: in the picture I'm about to link, the two on either end are called red spotted tabbies, and the two darker ones in the middle are red ticked tabbies. The male (I don't know which one he is) is spotted, and I want one of the ticked females. They're only 10 hours old in this picture. (http://oceanstar.com/cherry_newborns--crop.jpg).

Just to give you some idea, here's what a young red spotted tabby oriental (http://www.fotothing.com/photos/c28/c281bba006d4edb5e254d4c5689eebf0_42e.jpg) looks like, and here's a young red ticked tabby oriental (http://www.google.com/search?q=oriental+shorthair+red+ticked+tabby&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=H8FKU-jDBtfMsQS6tYK4Cw&ved=0CDEQ7Ak&biw=768&bih=902#biv=i%7C186;d%7C_ce__Gk4NTwfPM:). The latter is called "ticked" because even though the coat in the picture looks like a solid color, it has darker guard hairs—the "ticking." The eyes for both colors are green.

We love this breed because they're very sociable, affectionate, and playful all their lives. They play fetch, they come when they're called, they're devoted and sensitive like you wouldn't believe...in many ways they're like dogs. They're the polar opposite of an aloof, independent cat. And with a good breeder like ours, they're raised with lots and lots of TLC.

They don't leave the home they were born in, and they don't leave their mother, until 12 weeks of age, so we'll drive to New Jersey to pick them up in mid-July. We did this same thing before, with the same breeder, in 2001, and those cats were fabulous.

And yes, I already have names picked out, but I've gone on too long already...I'm just SO excited!! Since we don't have children, these cats are our kids!
I'm rockin' my 60s and like you, we don't have children either, or at least the 2 legged kind! We have two small terriers; the female is 5 lbs and the male is about 8. THEN, we have a big male cat that just towers over the two dogs. He was orphaned and we adopted him when he was just 6 wks old. He doesn't understand that he's not a dog, so the three of them run in a pack from one french door to another chasing the squirrels that tease them on the patio.

Congratulations on the birth of your "babies." People who don't have pets don't know what they're missing; they make a house a home.

Or as Will Rogers said, "If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went."

Chubbie Chick
04-20-2014, 01:43 AM
Thanks everyone for the support and welcome. I'm going to try and post every day even if I have nothing to say. I need to stay connected. I am reading along with everyone too. I'm going to Florida next month to visit my mom for a few weeks. I had to get two plane tickets. Talk about embarrassing. I haven't flown since I was 10 so I am kind of nervous. More so of the airport then the actual flight itself. I don't like new places and I don't know my way around. I will be alone too. I usually take the train but my mom is paying so she gets to pick my mode of transportation. We are driving back.


lilturtle:

I can understand being nervous about a plane trip. It seems things are so complicated today! My Honey and I travel quite a bit, so maybe these tips will help. You can check out the layout of the airport by going to the airport website. Then you can determine where you check in and what gate you'll be departing from. You might find it easier to do a curbside check in. That way your luggage will be taken care of and you can go directly to security and then to your gate. If your departure gate is a trek from security, call a few days ahead and arrange for transportation from check in to your gate. It'll make things easier for you. Check the airport website to determine if you have to remove your shoes as you go through security and wear easy-on, easy-off footwear if you have to remove your shoes. Try to think of this as an adventure and enjoy the departure from your regular daily routine. And don't forget to pack a few snacks in your carry-on bag. And gum! You'll want chewing gum to prepare your ears for the change in altitude as you land.

So relax and enjoy. You've prepared and now, you're ready for an adventure!

Chubbie Chick
04-20-2014, 01:55 AM
I hate myself so much today! My mood is so low and I am totally disgusted with myself.
I have gone 5 months without binging and since Tuesday have done nothing but eat. I feel like **** physically and mentally. I was doing so well. I can't believe what a loser I am.
I'm so all or nothing and obsessive. I really thought that when I started eating healthy after all the years of starving myself that the binge eating would stop. Wrong! Have been in tears since this started but does that stop me?? What is wrong with me?
I went to the book store today looking for Brain over Binge but they don't have it and can't order it in Canada. Bought 3 books on EDs but am not in the right mental state to read them.
Sorry for being so negative. Not trying to bring anyone down...just needed to vent


You are not a loser - if you were you wouldnt be on this site. You'd be sittin' on your couch, snacks all around, and chowing down. We're all in the same boat and we have to realize that not all days are going to be sunny and fluffy. Take it a day at a time and breathe............IT WILL GET BETTER!

VermontMom
04-20-2014, 10:03 AM
I hate myself so much today! My mood is so low and I am totally disgusted with myself.
I have gone 5 months without binging and since Tuesday have done nothing but eat. I feel like **** physically and mentally. I was doing so well. I can't believe what a loser I am.
I'm so all or nothing and obsessive. I really thought that when I started eating healthy after all the years of starving myself that the binge eating would stop. Wrong! Have been in tears since this started but does that stop me?? What is wrong with me?
I went to the book store today looking for Brain over Binge but they don't have it and can't order it in Canada. Bought 3 books on EDs but am not in the right mental state to read them.
Sorry for being so negative. Not trying to bring anyone down...just needed to vent

Oh, I am so sorry you are going through this :( Five months without a binge was spectacular!! and still is!! Please hang in there..and don't apologize for being negative, come here to vent and try to feel better :carrot:

So good to hear from Seabiscuit!

Hi Chubbie Chick and :welcome:!

My exercise this morning was Jillian Michael's No More Trouble Zones, boy it was hard!! I wanted to quit after 20 minutes but I stuck to it and did it all :cheer2:

worththeeffort2
04-20-2014, 10:32 AM
I hate myself so much today! My mood is so low and I am totally disgusted with myself.

Judi: I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I've been where you are; we've probably all been where you are. It is hard to be a Type-A, all-or-nothing, obsessive personality because it leads to a lot of negative self-talk when you don't meet your own expectations.

You're not a loser. You're human. We're all just human. Each tick of the clock is a chance to start fresh. You don't need to "wait until..." to start over; you just need to start again. Acknowledge that you didn't make good choices, then let it go. Don't keep beating yourself up because it only makes you feel worse and that low mood will help fuel your desire to binge in order to make yourself feel better.

If you have an e-Reader--like a Kindle or Nook--you can get Brain Over Binge that way. You can order it on Amazon. Or, hit up your local library on Monday and request the book through Interlibrary loan. Another resource that has helped me is Pema Chödrön's Don't Bite the Hook, on CD. I've listened to that CD hundreds of times and each time I start to slip back into self-punishment, I put it in the car CD player and listen to it on my commute to work. It will help you learn why beating yourself up is counter productive and provide suggestions for alternative thoughts to follow when you start to slip. Bonus: you can listen to it even when you're not in the mood to read anything.

Hang in there. We all need to vent. That's what the forums are for. Deep breaths. This moment is the perfect time to start new.

MonteCristo
04-20-2014, 11:49 AM
I hate myself so much today! My mood is so low and I am totally disgusted with myself.
I have gone 5 months without binging and since Tuesday have done nothing but eat. I feel like **** physically and mentally. I was doing so well. I can't believe what a loser I am.
I'm so all or nothing and obsessive. I really thought that when I started eating healthy after all the years of starving myself that the binge eating would stop. Wrong! Have been in tears since this started but does that stop me?? What is wrong with me?
I went to the book store today looking for Brain over Binge but they don't have it and can't order it in Canada. Bought 3 books on EDs but am not in the right mental state to read them.
Sorry for being so negative. Not trying to bring anyone down...just needed to vent

You are not a loser. :hug: 5 months is awesome. So you had a little slip, but I bet you are going get right back up and continue eating healthy. We all have slip ups.

Fiona W
04-20-2014, 01:29 PM
I was going through some old photos for an online friend who wants to know what I look like, so I thought I'd show you what I look like as an adult. I'm very averse to cameras, so I don't have much. This one (http://www.oceanstar.com/pics.htm) was when I was close to my current weight, somewhere in the 280s, I think. This one (http://www.oceanstar.com/fiona_at_wils.jpg) was when I had starved myself down to 230 in 2001. My eyes are sort of a slatey-blue with a darker blue ring around the iris. And I can't resist showing you my favorite photo of Bob (http://www.oceanstar.com/graphics/rgk1.jpg) (isn't he a cutie?), taken in the 1980s. Like most men (what is it with them?), he's barely aged a bit, except that his beard is now mostly white and his long hair shot through with lots of silver. My own hair is usually shorter than his, but always long enough to be down over my shoulders. It has a few dozen white hairs in it, but no one can ever see them, no matter how hard I try to point them out, because I have so many shades of blonde mixed together, they just look like the blonder hairs. (By the way, not a drop of peroxide or the equivalent has ever been near my hair. I have a thing about being a natural blonde, even if that blonde gets rather dark when I haven't had it in the sun for a while. My genetics are Scandinavian...)

Now come on, y'all: share some photos! Or at least describe what you look like....

I'm doing well, taking time off from the BERP today for some collage work.

VermontMom
04-20-2014, 04:46 PM
worththeeffort2, that was some very great words of wisdom and then advice (recommended reading) for projectjudi!

Fi, how nice to have the pics of you! I knew you didn't look like Else Lancaster! You do have beautiful hair! I am NOT a natural blonde :o I have medium brown hair but have enjoyed highlights and then alot more highlights in the past 6 years or so.

If I get these in the right order, they will be - from August 2012, when I had to speak in front of about 700 bikers, gathered at the Statehouse, for our annual Toy Run; then last year, feeding the fire in our redneck fire pit :D ; then me on the road, maybe 3 or 4 years ago .

ohiofreespirit
04-20-2014, 11:32 PM
Hey everyone,

I took my daughter back to college today after Easter dinner. It is a 4 hour round trip, I am tired. She comes home for the summer, in 2 weeks. I am excited.

My first class is over, as I said, my second and third class is math and a business class. My Major is Multimedia Design and Development. I will be able to do web design, graphic design, 3D graphics and many more things.

I'm really sorry some of you are struggling. I wish I could help somehow. Just hang in there, please, things will get better. I know they will.


Much love to all, you are in my prayers.

worththeeffort2
04-21-2014, 09:21 AM
The first photo is me at 292 pounds on Nov. 1, 2013. The second photo is me after losing 60 pounds, April 1, 2014. The journey continues.

MonteCristo
04-21-2014, 10:34 AM
Here's a few picture of me....first one is at my lowest adult weight (155) in 20010. Second is last Christmas (2012) at about 220. I'm on the far left, and those are two of my sisters, my dad and my uncle. The last one is recent, from just a month or so ago, though I cheated and didn't do full body. :)

http://i60.tinypic.com/fapvup.png
http://i60.tinypic.com/2jb9uag.png
http://i57.tinypic.com/300trhx.png

MonteCristo
04-21-2014, 10:35 AM
I have no idea why some of them are so gigantic...sorry.

Also, the scale finally moved!! Not only did I lose the 3lbs I gained at the beginning of TOM, but another 0.5lbs went too! So excited!! And 4/40 days sugar free completed. :D

ohiofreespirit
04-21-2014, 11:34 AM
You ladies look great in your pics, so pretty. Keep up the good work. Here I am yesterday at Easter with my daughter and my mom. I look really bad, no makeup on but I will post it anyway.


How is everyone today? I am off work. I really need a day off. As I said, I took my daughter back to school yesterday. She will be home in 2 weeks for the summer.


I am currently at 255 and seem to be stuck there. bleh My moods are good but I am under a lot of stress. I am doing my best to stay positive and upbeat. My meds are really helping.

I hope you all have a great day and I will check back in soon.

http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b131/kara_CM/26f3cc6d7c98472faad7171f960456df_zps7ab92f44.jpg

Fiona W
04-21-2014, 12:48 PM
I'm pushing hard on the BERP (Big Entropy Reduction Project) today, clip-clip-clipping away through stacks of magazines & catalogs. This is going to be my life for quite a few weeks to come—maybe I should call it the Huge, or the Ginormous, Entropy Reduction Project!—but I'm settling into the rhythm of it. I listen to rock-n-roll, of course, and at least while I'm clipping, I'm sitting down, so my back doesn't hurt. My right shoulder is complaining some from all the scissors work, but yesterday's break seems to have allowed the muscles to recover & strengthen. I may end up looking rather lopsided by the time this is over! =laugh=

Today was my weigh-in: since I bumped up to 286 in March, today's 282 is a loss of 4 lbs. for the month. That may not seem like much to show for all my low-carb days, but I cheated a few times by overdoing it with the muesli. Atkins works well when you stick to it, but when you add additional carbs, it comes to a screeching halt. I know this from experience. There's nothing to be done for it but to stick to my guns about having only 1/4 cup of muesli a day. It would be so much easier if I could just drop the muesli entirely, but I've tried that twice, and both times I developed bad depression pain. =sigh= So I'm having to learn moderation, which is much harder to master than abstaining entirely. At least I got to change my ticker.

But you know what? I hate to admit it here, but weight loss is not even close to being my #1 priority. Maintaining an even keel, mood-wise, is always #1—since I become totally useless when depressed or manic—and now the kittens are a strong #2. They won't have room to run and play in a house choked with paper, so...there you go...I got a new batch of pictures from the breeder, too, who says they're "growing like weeds and opening their eyes." All I have to do is think of those cute little orange fur-balls, and my focus on the BERP is laser-sharp.

Thanks so much for postin' pictures, y'all! 'Love that red hair, ohiofreespirit: do you have green eyes to go with it? Your family looks Irish. MonteCristo, wow, you're a babe! 'Love your eyebrows...and your hats! worththeeffort2, you're lookin' gooooood, girl! Congrats on losin' those 60 lbs. I suppose if I had a picture of me at 351...oh never mind, it would've been too hideous to post: just a huge round face on top of black, black, & more black. And Holly...oh man, you were born to be wild! I'm so glad to get to see you on your wheels, and I love your look, with the basic black (or white) over well-broken-in jeans. Classic, totally classic. Pretty face and nice waistline, too! I hope our fearless leader, Kathleen, will show us her smiling face, when she gets back from vacation.

projectjudi— I've thinkin' about you and wishin' you well. Did you check out the Brain over Binge blog? Lots of good info there: start with "Tips for Beginners."

Happy Earth Day, everyone! I've been celebrating it ever since the very first one, in 1970, when I was a silly-billy teenybopper.

lilturtle
04-21-2014, 01:26 PM
seabiscuit - I am from PA too. Where abouts are you? I'm in Harrisburg.

Judi - Hang in there. You are not a loser.

I am camera shy so I'll have to dig around for pictures or post one of the awful selfies. I just hate having my picture taken.

I am thinking of doing Wonderslim in June. I will be away most of May. I'm not sure I can afford it. I am still doing research. I need to do something more healthy then what I am doing now. I'm not getting enough protien most days.

CDubsGotGoats
04-21-2014, 02:44 PM
Hi All,

Sorry to have been away most of the month, I have been following. I have been having really bad depression problems so it is all I can do to manage the necessities; getting up in the morning, making it through work, taking care of the critters. How great to see everyones faces! I will see if I can find a picture somewhere around, we don't take a lot. Anyway, not a lot to say just wanted to check in.

Chelsea

Alita
04-21-2014, 03:52 PM
I've been away from this forum for a while, my weight has gone up and I don't seem to be able to stop it...I feel awful even though I do a lot of exercise, I can't stop eating. I'm hoping posting on here again will help :(. Hope everyone's doing ok!

projectjudi
04-21-2014, 04:20 PM
Thanks for all the encouragement and recommendations everyone!
So far today I am eating healthy. Praying I can keep it up. So sick of feeling so sluggish and ashamed.
Fi I did check out that website and you did an amazing job on the introduction. I am having difficulty getting the book in Canada. I don't have an e reader and that seems to be the only way I can get it. May have to take a trip across the border.
Worth the effort I will definately check out that Cd. Sometimes I really struggle with concentrating enough to read so this would be a bonus.
Thanks all for listening to me and supporting me. It means the world to me
hugs
Judi

seabiscuit
04-21-2014, 06:06 PM
Hi there...

Lil turtle - I'm in Bucks, moving to Philly in June. I'm not sure if I've ever been to Harrisburg.

I got back from my trip last night, I'm tired and my mom and I got into a huge fight, she never apologizes. I try to repair things when they go wrong but she is very difficult at times.

I'm thinking of rejoining WW, but the idea of getting on the scale scares me a bit, any ideas?

Thanks.

Fiona W
04-21-2014, 10:59 PM
Welcome back, seabiscuit! Sorry to hear about your difficulties with your mother. Sometimes those of us who try to fix other people, or fix our relationships, have to just back off and say, "This is beyond my power to fix." As for being afraid of the scale...why do you need the scale right now? The goal is longterm change in your eating behavior, right? You can get back on track toward that change right now, without the scale, and without the structure of a program like Weight Watchers. You've come a long way so far and accomplished a lot of weight loss. You can do it!

Welcome to the Ups & Downs Support Group, Alita! The first step is to start posting here—every day, if you can possibly swing it. You start being more accountable to yourself if you're posting about your daily struggles.

Judi— Thanks for your kind words about my article in the "Tips for Beginners, Continued" section of the Brain Over Binge blog: you're talking about my "yappy dog" story, right? I'm sorry to hear you're havin' trouble getting a copy of the book. I read one comment that distilled the essence of Kathryn Hansen's technique like this: Make a clear distinction in your mind between You, the "higher" brain, the person in charge of what you eat, and It, the thing in your "lower" brain that wants to binge. Every time you catch yourself thinking, "I want to binge," stop immediately and change that to "It wants to binge." And remember that You are the person who controls your hands, not It. And then use something like my "yappy dog" scenario to help you visualize that distinction. Does that make sense? (And here's the link to my article (http://brainoverbinge.blogspot.com/2014/01/tips-for-beginnerscontinued.html), in case anyone else wants to know what we're talking about.)

Chelsea— I'm so sorry to hear you're in the grips of the Big Bad D. Please know my thoughts are with you, as you struggle through this time. I've been there—oh man, have I...

Oh, and by the way, folks, I screwed up about what day it was: I was so eager for my weigh-in on the 22nd, I weighed myself a day early, on the 21st. Why is this of any interest to anyone? Because tomorrow, Tuesday, is Earth Day.

I was wondering why my radio station wasn't playing Earth-related songs all day like they had announced they would! Duh...

worththeeffort2
04-22-2014, 06:33 AM
I'm thinking of rejoining WW, but the idea of getting on the scale scares me a bit, any ideas?

If WW works for you, just do it. Don't let fear of the scale stop you. You need to do what is best for you and only you can decide what that is. Remember, it isn't about "can" and "can't," it's about "will" and "won't." When you start thinking in those terms, you'll start to reach your truth and you know what they say about the truth setting you free! :D

It's back to the gym for strength training today. No swimsuit, yet. Maybe it'll arrive in today's mail? The long weekend was all about cardio for me. I'm going to keep dogging it this week with hopes of seeing another 2 lb loss by Saturday's weigh in.

VermontMom
04-22-2014, 09:45 AM
So good to hear from Lil'turtle!

Chelsea - thank you for checking in..we are so sorry to hear that the big D has got you down, sometimes the next day can be so much better, so hang in there :hug:

Seabiscuit, real sorry about the fight, especially when it seemed there was a good time going on! btw, we used to live in Bucks County!

MonteCristo, you are so young! :D and cute! and where was that fabulous location, of the family pic?

worththeeffort - wow you are soooo much happier and smiley in your 60-flippin-pounds gone pic! :D :carrot: hope your swimsuit arrives soon and WTG on your cardio and today, strength.

Judi Hi :wave: and I hope your control goes back to how strong it was for so long :)

Alita - :welcome: Kudos to you for all your exercise! sometimes it just takes the brain a while to realize you're trying to do good things and then maybe the eating less mentality kicks in.

Fiona, Kathleen will be so happy on your exemplary role in commenting and helping everyone here! :) I'm glad you were eager for your weigh-in and now you can celebrate Earth Day again :D

Ohio, I love the 3 generation pic! and I'm glad that tho' your daughter went back to college, she will be back soon with you.

I feel I have to confess on a minor binge last night. I'm embarrassed to even say what it was, food-wise, maybe I can just calculate calories and I guess it was probably 500 calories. But sugar and fat. I've done very well at no sugar for almost 7 days straight. I've just got to suck it up and go on :) I let myself have 2 small cupcakes for Easter dinner dessert, and i wonder if that was what woke up the Sugar Craving monster.

Yesterday was also the first day in a week I didn't do a workout..I wonder if there is any connection. I was active outside, raking and picking up about a thousand sticks, but I didn't do a 'real' dvd-type workout. I will post back here when I complete a workout for today, I promise.

Oh yea, did I complain to you all about the junked van in our driveway that's been there forever? I did get it cleaned out and it was hauled away yesterday and they gave me a check for $150! remember when we had to pay to have junkers hauled away? I speak of this because part of my depression circles around clutter, seeing things that don't get worked on, feeling inadequate, stuff like that. When I do tackle a horrid project and it gets done solely due to my energy alone, that helps me alot.

Ah!! last edit. Started my bike, but she is sputtering and coughing and I can't get her to move ahead in first gear without stalling. Taking small steps first, I ordered an air cleaner kit and we will clean my air filter first to see if that helps. Weather is turning cooler and wetter for a couple days so I can be patient.

MonteCristo
04-22-2014, 11:00 AM
MonteCristo, you are so young! :D and cute! and where was that fabulous location, of the family pic?


Ah, thanks. I don't feel that young (28) but I do get that all the time. The family picture was taken in front of St Mark's Basiclia in Venice.

seabiscuit
04-22-2014, 11:09 AM
Hi there!

Thank you all for such positive support!

Holly- that's funny, what a small world! I live in Doylestown now but I'm moving to Philly in June. I have also lived in Upper Bucks, Sellersville, Quakertown and Richlandtown.

Fiona- thank you for your support!

Sorry, I can't scroll back to see who posted about WW but I found that reply very supportive. I'm seeing my therapist Thursday, I will talk with him about this.

Take care! Happy Spring!!!

CDubsGotGoats
04-22-2014, 01:27 PM
Welcome new and established friends!

Thank you for the support everyone. Fi, how exciting about your kitties they are beautiful!

I have started a core strength yoga/pilates class monday and wednesday during my lunch break. It is a really small class(only one other lady so far) which I really like. She is about the same size as I am, so it is encouraging and I don't feel embarrassed. I had to make myself pay for the 10 class course to 'encourage' myself to go every week. I have 3 months to finish 10 classes. It is really the first big step I have taken towards changing my patterns and I am a little nervous since I have been feeling so bad lately; sometimes I don't think I will be able to keep up the motivation to go. The small size will be helpful with that though... I sure am sore today, but it feels good.

On a happy note, the geese are sitting so we should have goslings in 3-4 weeks, and we got some duckies and a couple more chickens. Lots of shenanigans going on in the yard. There is a rainbow of eggs coming in now! One of the ducks lays blue eggs and the others lay a light pink, and the chickens lay a light brown and a dark speckled brown, the geese big white ones. It is nice to have enough coming in to share now too.

And a funny note, I have always know the "Big D" as something else, (diarrhea), so I got a good laugh out of your comments. Thank you again for the support, and also the unintentional humor :)

I will try to check in more often, I'm doing my best to fight the Big D :laughing: through behavioural changes since my anti-depressants are doing a really bad job.

Best to all,
Chelsea

VermontMom
04-22-2014, 02:21 PM
Chelsea, I love the visual of all those beautifully colored eggs :) so, you must sell/cook the eggs? do duck eggs taste different than chicken eggs? I hope i don't offend anyone here who is vegan maybe..i do love chicken eggs.

LOL @ the different version of The Big D :rofl:

okay I promised I would come back and post my exercise; I started Jillian Michaels 6 Week 6 Pack Abs level 1; did about 12 minutes then was interrupted by a necessary phone call. Could not get the TV to go back to my stopping point so then I did her Ripped in 30, for a total of 40 minutes. Then raking outside.

lilturtle
04-22-2014, 03:14 PM
Chelsea - Sorry to hear about the depression. I have been there quite often. It's hard to imagine it ever ending but it always does. Hang in there. This to shall pass.

I ate pie yesterday that was sent home with me on Easter. It was so good. So I ate pie for two days in a row. I am out of pie now so no more junk food. I have eaten just a granola bar today and will eat some pickles and carrots for dinner to make up for too many calories yesterday and Sunday. Have to get back on track. Still looking into Wonderslim. It would be healthier then what I am doing now.

ohiofreespirit
04-22-2014, 06:27 PM
Hi ladies,


Chelsea, I am so sorry you are struggling. We are all here for you if you need us.

With Easter here, I haven't been doing very well candy-wise. sigh


I am watching my favorite show, Castle. I am obsessed. If you've never seen it, you've got to watch it.

My class is done. My second session starts in a week. I am just waiting on my final grade. I hope I get an A.

I hope you all are well.

Fiona W
04-22-2014, 07:44 PM
I had a chance to make a fun collage today, one that I think Holly in particular might enjoy: here it is (https://www.flickr.com/photos/fi_webster/13972358861/).

I've been struggling a bit because I think the dose for my short-acting Adderal is too high—makes me feel really funky, like my brain is scrambled. I only take the short-acting one when I go to bed late and wake up late, because the extended-release version gives me insomnia if I take it too late in the morning. I'm motivated to get to bed on time tonight!

worththeeffort2
04-22-2014, 07:52 PM
The swimsuit arrived in today's mail. My husband washed it already and it is hanging up to dry. It looks like Thursday will be my first day using the pool at the rec. center.

hope4me
04-22-2014, 10:12 PM
Hi all,

Wow, long time, no post. Just wanted to pop in and say hi to Vermont. I'm so glad to see you're still posting and doing pretty well. You look great in your pictures! Congrats on getting rid of the van and I hope you are enjoying your break between jobs. Are you still off?

I turned 43 today and I may have said this the last time that I posted (whenever that was) but I am bigger than I've ever been and ever thought that I would be. My cholesterol and blood pressure are high and I'm now pre-diabetic. Yikes. (my ticker is way off) I've gotta do something b/c it's really affecting my health. Enough with the crappy reality of it all. ;)
On the good side, I have some wonderful friends and a decent life. The beauty of getting older is also that you care much less about what people think about you and that is wonderful.

I'm glad to see that the thread is so active. You guys are great.

VermontMom
04-23-2014, 10:47 AM
Chelsea - Sorry to hear about the depression. I have been there quite often. It's hard to imagine it ever ending but it always does. Hang in there. This to shall pass.


That is very true and isn't it always helpful to know that we are not alone :) I hope you are able to find some foods that you can shop for and keep at home to keep you healthy, lilturtle :)

I had a chance to make a fun collage today, one that I think Holly in particular might enjoy: here it is (https://www.flickr.com/photos/fi_webster/13972358861/).


That WAS very kewl! :cool: and I hope you got to bed on time last night.

Hi ladies,


Chelsea, I am so sorry you are struggling. We are all here for you if you need us.

With Easter here, I haven't been doing very well candy-wise. sigh


I am watching my favorite show, Castle. I am obsessed. If you've never seen it, you've got to watch it.

My class is done. My second session starts in a week. I am just waiting on my final grade. I hope I get an A.

I hope you all are well.

I'm not familiar with that show..maybe I should be! :) And I also hope you get an A I am lucky that NO Easter candy came into this house because I would not be able to resist.

The swimsuit arrived in today's mail. My husband washed it already and it is hanging up to dry. It looks like Thursday will be my first day using the pool at the rec. center.

Yay! :)

Hi all,

Wow, long time, no post. Just wanted to pop in and say hi to Vermont. I'm so glad to see you're still posting and doing pretty well. You look great in your pictures! Congrats on getting rid of the van and I hope you are enjoying your break between jobs. Are you still off?

I turned 43 today and I may have said this the last time that I posted (whenever that was) but I am bigger than I've ever been and ever thought that I would be. My cholesterol and blood pressure are high and I'm now pre-diabetic. Yikes. (my ticker is way off) I've gotta do something b/c it's really affecting my health. Enough with the crappy reality of it all. ;)
On the good side, I have some wonderful friends and a decent life. The beauty of getting older is also that you care much less about what people think about you and that is wonderful.

I'm glad to see that the thread is so active. You guys are great.

Hopey, so good to hear from you! :hug: Oh I am definitely enjoying my time off, it is SO great to forget what day of the week it is :D I am off until about May 5th!!

I am real sorry about your b/p and cholesterol being problematic :( I have no advice..I don't know why it suddenly was do-able for me to cut back on carbs and work out harder (besides the time off, that is definitely a plus) but I hope somehow you are able to, for your quality of life :) LOL and how true about not caring as much about what people think :devil:

Dreary and cloudy and damp outside today, not even 40 degrees, ugh. Real glad I got outside and did yard work yesterday.

My exercise today was brutal, I have the time and no excuse so I did this over-an-hour-long workout, HIIT Cardio, Strength, Core www.fitnessblender.com/v/workout-detail/1000-Calorie-Workout-Video-Fitness-Blender-s-84-Minute-HIIT-Cardio-Strength-Abs/ee/trength,

lilturtle
04-23-2014, 11:04 AM
A very kind angel from here has sent me a scale. It came yesterday and today I will use it. I'm so grateful now to have a scale. Thank you Fi for being the go between. I'll post my results when I get them.

lilturtle
04-23-2014, 11:14 AM
Ok weighed myself. I come in at 377 which is about 13 lbs less then I was a month ago. All the hungry days are not for nothing after all!!

Thanks again scale angel!

ohiofreespirit
04-23-2014, 11:32 AM
Ok weighed myself. I come in at 377 which is about 13 lbs less then I was a month ago. All the hungry days are not for nothing after all!!

Thanks again scale angel!



That is wonderful news!!!!! Congrats sweetie, I am so proud of you. *hug*

I need a scale too, I don't have one. I would probably weigh myself once or twice a week. The last time I weighed myself I was 255.

VermontMom
04-23-2014, 02:43 PM
I turned 43 today

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HOPE! :D:bday2you:

VermontMom
04-23-2014, 02:45 PM
Ok weighed myself. I come in at 377 which is about 13 lbs less then I was a month ago. All the hungry days are not for nothing after all!!

Thanks again scale angel!

13 pounds gone in a month is stupendous! :D :cheer2: :bravo:

and YAY to scale angels! :angel:

projectjudi
04-23-2014, 04:00 PM
Wanted to thank you all for the support you gave me. Thanks for not judging me when I felt like a total freak and failure. Have been eating healthy for 2 days now and can't believe the difference in how I feel.
I am extremely grateful that I found this group as I have no one to talk to about food issues..they just wouldn't get it.
Was great to see the photos of you guys. I honestly have not allowed a photo to be taken of me since well before I got up to 404 pounds. Will get on that for sure.
Thanks again guys. Your support meant the world to me

VermontMom
04-23-2014, 05:44 PM
Wanted to thank you all for the support you gave me. Thanks for not judging me when I felt like a total freak and failure. Have been eating healthy for 2 days now and can't believe the difference in how I feel.
I am extremely grateful that I found this group as I have no one to talk to about food issues..they just wouldn't get it.
Was great to see the photos of you guys. I honestly have not allowed a photo to be taken of me since well before I got up to 404 pounds. Will get on that for sure.
Thanks again guys. Your support meant the world to me

we are all in this together! :D :hug: I am so glad you are back track! :carrot:

I guess I did not notice your starting point before...OMG.!!!! :dancer: :flow1: :high:at what you've lost!

ohiofreespirit
04-23-2014, 06:46 PM
Wanted to thank you all for the support you gave me. Thanks for not judging me when I felt like a total freak and failure. Have been eating healthy for 2 days now and can't believe the difference in how I feel.
I am extremely grateful that I found this group as I have no one to talk to about food issues..they just wouldn't get it.
Was great to see the photos of you guys. I honestly have not allowed a photo to be taken of me since well before I got up to 404 pounds. Will get on that for sure.
Thanks again guys. Your support meant the world to me


Judi,

We are always here for you. Always. :hug: I know what you mean about pictures. I hate having my picture taken. I look so big. :(

We are so glad you are here with us!!!

Fiona W
04-23-2014, 10:08 PM
Greetings, everyone. Thanks for the comments on my collage: I do love feedback!

Trish, it's so great to hear you got your scale, and boy howdy! 13 pounds is a nice thing to find out about. Holly, I think you're really doin' the top-notch cheerleadin' duties here while Kathleen is gone—not me! =grin= ohiofreespirit, I'm rootin' hard for you to get an A. I'm so glad you showed us your picture: you're lovely! Judi, yes indeed, you can talk about anything here and not be judged. I'm so glad to hear you're back on track. It won't be too long now 'til you hit the 200-pounds-lost milestone. Won't that be something? =smile= How do you plan to reward yourself? seabiscuit, I hope you keep posting here, no matter what you decide about how to continue your weight loss journey. Hope, Belated Happy Birthday! Please stick around. worththeeffort2, how nice of your husband to wash your new swimsuit for you. 'Bet you're lookin' forward to using it! Chelsea, my thoughts are with you, every day... MonteCristo, what's up? Kathleen, we're thinkin' about you and hopin' you're havin' a terrific & restorative vacation. Everyone else, tell us what you're up to! Don't be shy...

I worked very hard on the BERP (Big Entropy Reduction Project) today. My right shoulder is a bit achey from all the scissors work, but it's not injured or anything, so I'm hangin' in here. My sweetie helped out by doing some much-needed grocery shopping for me. I'll have cream for my coffee in the morning.

All is well tonight, as I prepare to go to bed early and dream of orange fur-balls. Ahhh....

seabiscuit
04-23-2014, 10:13 PM
Hi there...

Happy belated birthday Hope!

Fiona, thank you for your kind words. I like the support here.

I'm just having a rough night or rather a rough week. It was initially a nasty arguement with my Mom, then some "friends" have been getting on my nerves making me wonder whether or not I want to stay friends with them. Oh and the thing that caught me completely off guard was hearing a doctor say today that he suggested surgery for my nose and sinuses since I have recurrent infections, nosebleeds and congestion. I wasn't expecting to hear that and I had a nasal/sinus surgery 2 decades ago. It helped tremendously even though it was incredibly painful, true agony. I don't know, I think they have improved things a lot. I still don't want to do it though. The other side issue is I have been doing online dating, some guys seem nice but most of them seem pressuring and creepy, ick!

Sigh, thanks for listening.

worththeeffort2
04-24-2014, 06:40 AM
Ladies, the legs be shaved. I'm heading to the pool after work tonight. *Yikes!*

lilturtle
04-24-2014, 12:24 PM
Happy belated birthday Hope!

I'm hanging in there. Not much to report. Trying to resist the urge to weigh like every hour now. lol I'm out of my buspar due to a screw up at the pharmacy but I should be getting it today. Not sure it does anything.

seabiscuit
04-24-2014, 12:50 PM
Hi there,

Worththeeffort, I hope that you enjoy your swim. I love to swim and I am planning to go this Friday, I love swimming laps.

Lilturtle, I used to take Buspar but I couldn't stand the taste of it because to me it had a very strong taste. I wish they enterically coated it. I hear you on weighing oneself a lot, I used to be a bit obsessed with my scale when I had it, I finally threw it out.

Does anyone have any preferences for WW online/etools or meetings? I am thinking of doing online/etools again, it's just the idea of having a scale at home which upsets and unnerves me a bit. Can anyone recommend a scale?

Take care!

Amy

VermontMom
04-24-2014, 12:59 PM
Hi there...

Happy belated birthday Hope!

Fiona, thank you for your kind words. I like the support here.

I'm just having a rough night or rather a rough week. It was initially a nasty arguement with my Mom, then some "friends" have been getting on my nerves making me wonder whether or not I want to stay friends with them. Oh and the thing that caught me completely off guard was hearing a doctor say today that he suggested surgery for my nose and sinuses since I have recurrent infections, nosebleeds and congestion. I wasn't expecting to hear that and I had a nasal/sinus surgery 2 decades ago. It helped tremendously even though it was incredibly painful, true agony. I don't know, I think they have improved things a lot. I still don't want to do it though. The other side issue is I have been doing online dating, some guys seem nice but most of them seem pressuring and creepy, ick!

Sigh, thanks for listening.

Real sorry about the rough week :hug: "friends" that don't act like friends are sometimes not worth the bother, if they keep disappointing you :( best wishes on the online dating, must be daunting to go swimming in that sea to find a good fish!


I worked very hard on the BERP (Big Entropy Reduction Project) today. My right shoulder is a bit achey from all the scissors work, but it's not injured or anything, so I'm hangin' in here. My sweetie helped out by doing some much-needed grocery shopping for me. I'll have cream for my coffee in the morning.

All is well tonight, as I prepare to go to bed early and dream of orange fur-balls. Ahhh....

Good work on the project! and isn't it wonderful when the partner steps up and does something so helpful..boy the cream for the coffee is VERY important isn't it!

Ladies, the legs be shaved. I'm heading to the pool after work tonight. *Yikes!*

:D :rofl: :cheer2: YAY worththeeffort2!!! we will be thinking of you tonight!!



I'm hanging in there. Not much to report. Trying to resist the urge to weigh like every hour now. lol I'm out of my buspar due to a screw up at the pharmacy but I should be getting it today. Not sure it does anything.

Well you must be so happy at stepping on teh scale and seeing your losses! Hope you get your Buspar today.

I've been sticking to my diet very well, I'm amazed to say :shock: Don't know where my willpower is coming from and why I couldn't grasp it any sooner, but whatever. Even when things seem good, I see I do have to PUSH and propel myself into action..like right now I know it is relatively mild outside (50) and sunny so I could do yard work, which I do like, but it is just as easy to talk myself into continuing to sit here on the computer, or taking my Kindlefire upstairs to my room and laying down to watch a movie and falling asleep :?: I need a nanny or a paid companion or someone to prod me :D

*edit to add, I did go out to rake for an hour, yay. And my exercise today was Annie Mair's Cardio Force dvd, 30 min. step cardio then 5 min. ab conditioning.

seabiscuit
04-24-2014, 08:15 PM
Hi Holly

It's good to hear from you and thank you so much for your kind words and the hug! ;)

I saw my therapist today and we had a good talk. It felt good to unload a lot of these feelings off of my chest. He is nice but he cuts right to the chase and makes his point, which is nice.

I am not sure what I am going to do with these "friends." My therapist suggested writing a card saying that I miss their friendship. I'm not sure.

Personally, I feel so much better being back at home with my guinea pig, Snickers. He is so therapeutic for me, it's funny because he loves to nibble at my fingers. Today, my friend came over and helped me pack up for the move, I am glad that we made a dent in the packing. She is very kind, she helped care for me after my ankle surgery. We've become very close and she cares for Snickers whenever I go away.

Have a good night and take care!

Amy

worththeeffort2
04-25-2014, 06:25 AM
:swim: <-- Here I am, doing laps at the pool. ;)

A lot of emotions came up over my time at the lap pool. I actually used the women's locker room to change. Trauma One. I was able to find an empty toilet stall for some privacy to change into my suit. The pre-pool shower was icy-icy cold. Walking out into the public pool area required just biting the bullet and stepping out of the locker room. Fortunately, once I took my glasses off, I couldn't see a thing so was unable to tell if people were shooting looks at me or not. That was unsettling as well as a relief.

The chlorine bothered me in a way it never has before. Of course, it has been some 15 years since I've been anywhere near a pool or swam a stroke. Anyway, I ended up with a blistering headache. Despite hydrating all day long--we're talking about 120 oz of water--I got dehydrated very quickly and ended up feeling very dizzy and sick to my stomach as I was leaving. Lots of fresh air, 18 oz of water, and 20 minutes later, I started to feel normal again.

Since it has been so very long since I've been swimming, my stroke and kick were incredibly weak but I slowly made my way back and forth, the length of the lap pool about 10 times in 30 minutes. I did have to take breaks in between but I also used the edge of the pool to hang on and practice scissor kicks and to stretch.

It ended up being a good, overall workout. I worked muscles from head to toe, including those hard to reach glutes. (Holy crap!) I do think I need to re-evaluate my workout schedule, if I'm going to use the pool regularly and add a day at the gym just for the pool while keeping two days for strength training. One day of strength training a week just isn't going to be enough to keep making progress.

Anyhoo--I took an incredibly scary step and survived! Thank you, Holly and everyone else here for offering such great support. If anyone on the forum has been up in the air about doing something that scares them, I'm here to tell you, just step up and do it.

projectjudi
04-25-2014, 07:10 AM
worththeeffort I am so proud of you for taking the first step at the pool. I don't have the confidence to go to the pool. Was trying on suits the other day and my excess skin made me look horrendous (if that's a word)

seabiscuit hope you feel better soon

Hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

MonteCristo
04-25-2014, 11:59 AM
Hi Everyone.

Had a rough couple of days. I was feeling so good coming off the weekend, getting some much yard and house work done, plus having a weight loss, that I forgot to take my medication Monday morning. Then I had to be at work at 5:30a.m. for a special meeting on Tuesday, which caused me to forget for the second day in a row. By the end of the day Tuesday I was in a hideous funk. Which isn't normal for me...usually if I forget my medicine I just get stressed out and really really *****y, but I think because no one was around (almost the entire department was out Monday) instead of having someone to snap out, I just got really morose. I just wanted to cry, and stay in bed with my pets (I have 2 cats and a dog, I'll post some pictures eventually). Since it was such a quiet week at work, I went ahead and called in sick the last two days and did just that.

On the one hand it is sad to realize that I'm so dependent on the medication. My mom was very anti-medicine, wouldn't even take tylenol and didn't have us vaccinated, so on some level it makes me feel week to need medication. But then again, it is a huge relief now that there is something that can help. That I really have a problem, and I'm not just lazy or stupid. This group has really been helpful...I'm extremely open about this kind of stuff, but none of my immediate circle has any experience with it at all...and I think it kind of scares them a little. :(

Anyway, had a great weigh in this morning (I weigh M & F, I tried to do once a week, but I've found it helps to know before the weekend how well I did during the week, helps keep the momentum going). Down 1.2lbs since Monday. The no sugar thing really hasn't been that hard, surprisingly. I still crave a coke occasionaly, and I made my little brother let me smell his ice cream sandwich the other day, but on a day by day basis it has been really easy. I think I will make it an ongoing thing, not militant obviously, but only for special occasions, one or twice a month.

Thanks for reading all that. :)

MonteCristo
04-25-2014, 12:21 PM
worththeeffort2 - Great job starting up swimming again. That must be a fabulous workout. I was wondering, are you sure it was the chlorine that was bothering you at the pool? I ask because you said you had your glasses off and coudln't see, and I'm also practically blind, and if I go around without corrective lenses I get dizzy and nauseated and severe headaches. Don't know if you considered it, but when I swim I wear contacts with goggles, and it makes all the difference in the world.

seabiscuit - So glad you have a good therapist to help you out. I imagine that can make a huge difference.

Vermont mom - You are really impressive with the dieting and exercise. So inspiring!!

lilturle - I went through a phase when I weighed all the time too. I had to put my scale up in an awkward place so it was more trouble than it was worth to break me of the habit. Now it doesn't bother me so much so I just keep it under my calendar. And everytime I weigh I write the number right on the calendar. It makes for a nice visual. And great job on the 13lbs lost!! That is fantastic for one month. :)

Fiona W - Good luch on your BERP project. Your comment about the scissors reminds me of my dad explaining to me why the guys who cut sheet metal have one arm that is so much bigger than the other...

project judi - Wow, I hadn't noticed your total weight loss either. That is ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC!! You really are a rock star of weight loss. You can do anything! :D

ohio free spirit - I love Castle. Well, it is really Nathan Fillion that I love, but he practically plays himself in Castle, so all is good. I haven't watched it for a couple of seasons, but I'm sure I'll pick it back up eventually.

Chelsea - I love yoga. It is so relaxing and peaceful...and is surprising tough on your core. The first month I did it I lost 2 inches off my waist. That is something that I really need to get back into.

Alita - Welcome! Sometimes we need baby steps, and if your first one is just posting, then good for you! We'll be here. :)

FleurDeLis
04-25-2014, 02:29 PM
Hi everyone,

My name is Sabrina or FleurDeLis, whichever you prefer. I was diagnosed with depression in high school. I'm now 24 and after several defiant trials by me where I stopped taking my citalopram, I'm very accepting of the fact that I will most likely be on a medication for this for the rest of my life. I now take sertraline, generic zoloft. I was prescribed that when I became pregnant last summer.

I gave birth to a stillborn daughter on March 21, 2014. I was 38 weeks pregnant. The first few days and weeks were very rough. My husband and I have clung to our Catholic faith during this time and it has strengthened us. Quite honestly I'm shocked to be doing so well. I would have thought that having already suffered from depression, it would make this even more difficult, but like I said, I have found incredible strength with my faith.

I have one more week left before I return to work. I'm not excited about this because my job involves seeing children quite a bit. I have been searching for another job, but it's a slow process. Basically, I don't want to stay at my current job long term anymore. I have a bit of a feeling that returning to work is going to bring on a sudden wave of issues for me. :/

Seabiscuit- I met my husband via online dating. It took me a year or two and weeding through a lot of guys who were creepy/just wanted to have sex, but I did find a good one. We were engaged on our one year anniversary and married on our two year anniversary. Don't get discouraged, there's someone great out there just waiting to meet you!

worththeeffort- nice job on the swimming. I did a lot of swimming during my early pregnancy. I just love being in the water. I can't wait to get clearance from my doctor to get back in the pool. Before I wore a two piece, now sadly due to the weight gain from pregnancy and the atrocious stretch marks, I'll be getting a one piece for sure!

MonteCristo
04-25-2014, 03:09 PM
Hi Sabrina. Welcome to the group.

So very sorry for your loss. I'm glad you are able to find strength in your faith.

lilturtle
04-25-2014, 03:20 PM
Well it's Friday and I want pizza. Instead I am having baked chicken and squash. *sigh* I haven't weighed myself today. I am going to try to stick to Wednesdays for now. I think it would be discouraging to do it every day. I'm leaving for FL soon to visit my mom. Well sort of soon. The 5th. I hate my bothing suit. It is purple which is my favorite color but I think I look a bit like Barney. I always wear a long tshirt over it. I don't know what I think I am hiding. When it is wet the tshirt sticks to me anyways. But still I wear a tshirt. I will be going to the pool often when I am in FL. My mom lives in The Villages and they have like 60 pools or some other crazy number. We may go to St Augustine for the day but I am more interested in the hisotrical sites then the beach.

I'm reading along with everyone and wishing you all well!

VermontMom
04-25-2014, 04:40 PM
Monte Cristo, I am so sorry you were thrown so off track by missing your medication..ugh! So hopefully once you re-take it you can get back to your cool self :cool: :)

worththeeffort, YAY on taking that scary step! and so glad it was a great workout for you .

lil'turle - mmm baked chicken and squash sounds delicious, I hope it was filling and good for you! good choice!

Sabrini - hello and :welcome: ! words can't express how sorry I am to hear what happened to your baby ... I hope we get to know each other and hope you find this forum as great and supportive as I have.

HI to everyone else! :wave:

I did not do a workout today...it's okay, I am minding my food, and I had alot of calories burned from cleaning my DH's side of the room like a demon! One bag of trash, six boxes of clothes and household stuff OUT of there and taken to re-use center. Vacuumed thoroughly. It'll look good for maybe a couple weeks :D

OH how could I forget this - I GOT OUT ON MY MOTORCYCLE TODAY :D :D finally! just a short ride to town but it .. was .. GREAT :cool:

FleurDeLis
04-25-2014, 05:37 PM
MonteCristo- Thanks.

lilturtle- Good job on resisting the pizza and going for the healthier option! I gain confidence when I resist temptation. Today when I was grocery shopping I picked up a box of krispy cream doughnut holes. They smelled good and looked good. When I saw how high the calories were, I slowly set them down and walked away.

Vermontmom-Thank you. I feel really welcome and comfortable here. It's nice to combine weight loss and our struggles as well. So excited you go to get out and ride! I had a motorcycle a few years ago. I sold it so I could move out of my parents house and into my own apartment. It was so much fun. I loved it! I'd like to get another one sometime, but my DH probably wouldn't approve. :/

seabiscuit
04-25-2014, 06:42 PM
Hi there,

I hope that everyone is having a good day. I am going back to see my family doctor tomorrow, I felt very congested and fatigued when I woke up this morning, I really slept in and I almost never sleep in as late as I did. I'm on antibiotics again, maybe I should get this nasal and sinus surgery, I am getting a couple of other opinions. I feel badly that I was a little snippy with one of the receptionists at one of the doc's offices, I apologized. I think that I feel so unnerved with the possibility for needing surgery again that I am scared and anxious. I haven't really been myself lately with feeling emotionally more on edge and out of whack and physically also feeling drained.

I appreciate all of the support here. Everyone is so caring and kind. :)

worth the effort- Good for you for swimming laps! I really wanted to swim today but I just didn't feel up to it. I find swimming to be so relaxing.

project judi- Thank you, I appreciate your well wishes.

Monte Cristo- Way to go on the weigh in! Yes, I do like my therapist and I will miss him after I leave. It feels great to be able to get my feelings off of my chest.

Sabrina- I am so sorry for your loss, huge hugs. :hug:

Lilturtle- Hi from another part of PA!!

Holly- Hi! Good for you for doing household cleaning. I need to do more of that.
It's exhausting but worth it!

Take care everyone, TGIF!!

Amy ;)

Fiona W
04-25-2014, 06:51 PM
Welcome to the Ups & Downs thread, Sabrina! I am very sorry to hear abut the loss of your baby. That must have been, must still be, devastating. You sound like you're being really brave about it. I'm on psych meds for the rest of my life, too, so I know the feeling. Just remember you are still the same person on antidepressants: if they help you, they are helping you be more the real you, not the depressed you.

worththeeffort2— Way to go for braving the locker room, getting in the pool, and making a good first effort!! I want to start swimming, too, but not for afew months. You're my hero!

I'm bearing up better under the pressure of the BERP (Big Entropy Reduction Project, in my house) than I was yesterday. I'm trying hard to make sure I get the right nutrition, at the right times, and that I stay hydrated. I've decided to take a break from the work every day between 1 PM and 5 PM, because afternoons are my worst time of day, and I'm giving myself every Sunday off. Yesterday I was pretty stressed out about it, but that feeling hit in the afternoon. Today's afternoon break really helped. Well, I've got to get back to it....Take care, y'all!

IBelieveInMe2
04-25-2014, 09:21 PM
Hello Everyone!!! My goodness, I absolutely LOVE the support and conversation that is going on in our group!!! Maybe I need to go away more often! :lol: Seriously, though, I truly appreciate everyone's input. Holly and Fi, you did an excellent job of making everyone feel comfortable and welcome and I am beyond grateful for your presence here! Please keep it up! We are all in this together, after all!!! I would so appreciate it if you both would be co-leaders of the group with me! No pressure; just an invitation. ;) I did actually check in once during my vacation and had written a LONG post and then it got lost in cyberspace and we had to leave the resort to go to dinner. I was so bummed out to lose my post, but I LOVED seeing all of the other posts in the group! :D It looks like our group has "officially" taken off! :carrot: We had a wonderful vacation with perfect weather. :sunny: My eating was not great most days, so I really dread seeing the damage on the scale. Not sure if I will weigh in tomorrow or not. I had taken several pairs of shorts from last summer, and ~ when I went to wear them in Florida ~ they were either too tight or barely fit, so I had to go buy bigger shorts! :( That was really a BUMMER, but I tried to not let it get me too down. I am trying to push forward and get back on board. My weight is obviously creeping up again, but I will NOT go down without a fight!!! Now that we are back home, I need to really control my eating and exercise consistently again. I go back to the doctor in May to have my thyroid levels checked again (since starting the medication Synthroid), so that will be interesting.

Sabrina: :welcome: to our group! I am so very sorry for the loss of your precious daughter. :cry: :hug: We lost one of our twins 18 years ago (first pregnancy) to extreme prematurity. He lived for 14 hours. The death of a child is so painful. Words cannot describe the heartbreak that is felt. My heart goes out to you. Like you, I/we found comfort in our Catholic faith. It is the only thing that kept me from going crazy! Happy to hear that it has kept you strong through your grief. Best of luck to you as you return to work and with your search for a new job! Glad you posted! :)

Trish (lilturtle): I am soooooooooooooooooooooo incredibly HAPPY that you have returned to the group!!! :D And a HUGE CONGRATULATIONS on your weight loss!!! :carrot: Glad that you finally have a scale, thanks to your scale angel, Fi! :)

worththeeffort2: I am so impressed with your swimming excursion!!! You are inspiring me to get outdoors soon (as weather permits) and do laps in our new backyard swimming pool. Heck, I am embarrassed to put on a swimsuit in our own back yard!!! You are a rock star for braving it at the gym!!! :carrot: So happy that your swimsuit finally arrived! Do you like it as much as you hoped you would? Happy to see you keep posting! :)

Amy (seabiscuit): So sorry that you have not felt quite yourself. Good luck deciding on the nasal and sinus surgery. Not an easy decision, I would imagine. I hope you also decide what to do with your "friends" that have you in a dilemna. On the WW decision, I personally feel that the meetings would be more beneficial and make you feel more accountable. I tried WW Online very briefly and found it too easy to stray. You have lots of decisions to make. One thing at a time! Hang in there! :hug:

MonteCristo: Sorry that you had a rough time after forgetting your meds two days in a row. It can be really scary to feel so dependent on meds, but thank God for them, too, ya know?!? Congrats on being down 1.2 pounds at your Friday weigh-in! Glad to see you continue to post here! :)

projectjudi: I was just gonna chime in with the others who reminded you that you are certainly NOT a loser!!! So happy everyone was here to support you through a difficult time. Hope you are feeling at least a little bit better about things now. One day and one moment at a time! YOU CAN DO THIS!!! ;)

Alita: :welcome2: Happy that you posted!

hope4me: Happy Belated Birthday! Hope you had a wonderful day! Did you do anything special to celebrate? I can sooooo relate to being bigger than ever and bigger than you ever thought you would be. I am in the same boat! :( We can both turn this around, though, and LOSE the weight!!! Let's do it together!!! :hug:

Chelsea (CDubsGotGoats): Hate to hear that you have been battling with depression lately. I hope you are feeling at least somewhat better by the time you read this post. Big hugs to you! :hug: :hug: :hug:

Fi: Good luck as you continue with the BERP in your home. What exactly is that? I am happy to hear that you are focusing on getting adequate nutrition and sleep and taking well-deserved breaks at regular intervals during this project. Thank you again for welcoming the newbies and supporting everyone in my absence. :)

Holly: You are doing so well lately ~ with both weight loss and decluttering!!! You are an inspiration to me!!! I hope all of your hard work pays off with the slimmer and trimmer YOU that you so desire! I really appreciate all of your support and presence here while I was gone. You really have things rolling here and I hope it will continue! So happy to hear that you got out on that bike, "Cupcake!" ;) :bike: :carrot:

Fiona W
04-26-2014, 03:16 AM
Kathleen— It's late, and I'm trashed, but I wanted to say "Welcome back!" and also to correct something you said: I was not Trish's scale angel. i was just the go-between. Another person, who wishes to remain anonymous, wrote me a private message asking if I would get Trish's address so she could send her a scale via Amazon. After Trish returned to the group, she gave me her address. I gave it to the angel, and the angel sent the scale—yay!

As for the BERP (Big Entropy Reduction Project), it's just my all-inclusive term for a major effort to clear out all the piles of paper and to square away miscellaneous books & art supplies in a more orderly fashion. (Collage artists hoard paper: it's only natural that we do, because where else do we get our images from? =smile=) I'll also be giving away a lot, a WHOLE lot, of books. All of that has to be done before Bob and I can work together to clean our house and to make it a safe & fun place for the two kittens, who arrive in mid-July.

worththeeffort2
04-26-2014, 09:55 AM
Good morning, everyone. I suppose I should not be disappointed by a one-pound weight loss this week but I am a little bit. I did so much cardio this week, I was really hoping for two. Oh, well. Just got to keep working at it.

projectJudi: I ordered my suit from SwimOutlet.com. I'll paste a photo from the website below. The design helps hide my belly. I went by my measurements on sizing and it fits well. I did get a pair of swim shorts to wear over it to give me some extra length to hide my thighs a bit.

MonteCristo: I hope you are starting to feel a bit better. It is understandable that you are unhappy about needing medicine but on the plus side, you've discovered the medicine you need to help you feel better. Your mom may have set an anti-medicine tone for you early in life but you're an adult now and need to make the best choices for you based on your personal experience. Your mom isn't living your life; you are. Personally, I think you are strong to face down the opposition and do what you need to do for YOU. :hug: I congratulate you for working so hard to keep yourself well and I hope you come up with a way to make sure you don't miss anymore doses so you can continue to feel well.

Congratulations on the 1.2lb loss! I'm glad the no sugar thing isn't creating issues for you. Honestly, I hadn't thought about the fact I wasn't wearing glasses might impact my balance, etc. It was the longest I've gone without glasses during any kind of activity. Interesting thought!

Sabrina: Welcome to the group! I am so very sorry to learn of the loss of your beautiful daughter. I'm sure it is very difficult and a loss that you will feel forever. I wonder if your place of work would allow you to just stop in for a little bit this week, just so you can expose yourself to the environment and see how it affects you? It might allow you to know whether or not being around the children will be too much and help you make that final decision about moving on to another position elsewhere.

Lilturtle: I hope you take advantage of the pool access to swim some laps. After I did my laps this week, I entered the info into MyFitnessPal tracker and discovered that I'd burned over 300 calories in 30 minutes! Have fun sight seeing and checking out the historical locations. Hope you have a wonderful, relaxing trip.

Holly: So glad to hear you got out on the bike and had a quick ride around town. Hopefully, your weather will cooperate and you can get out again this weekend.

IBelieveInMe2: Welcome home! I'm glad you had a wonderful vacation and enjoyed perfect weather.

Reading about everyone working on spring house cleaning has me thinking that I have to do more than just stare at the cobweb in the corner of the kitchen ceiling and think, "I really should get out the vacuum cleaner."

We're having pretty gray weather this weekend so I was planning to shuffle over winter and spring/summer clothes. With any luck, none of my winter clothes will fit come next November but I can't quite part with them yet, simply because of the daunting thought of the cost it will be to replace everything. If I wait and try things on again next fall, maybe I'll be able to make do with some of the sweaters? It won't hurt to just pack them away for a few months.

VermontMom
04-26-2014, 02:56 PM
WELCOME BACK KATHLEEN :) :flow1: I'm so glad you had perfect weather :cool: and it is so nice to be so complemented by you, for Fi and I being chatty and friendly :D I'm going to sprinkle extra :dust: :dust: :dust: for you, and I, and anyone else who needs to be covered with it :devil:

Weather-wise, it is yuck out there today! drizzly and 45, definitely not motorcycling weather but that's okay, i will be patient.

Today my exercise was Jillian Michael's 6 Week 6 Pack Abs, level 1 which is pretty brutal, I dont even want to think about what she cooks up in Levels 2 or 3!

:wave: to everyone and I hope this day is being good to you :)

FleurDeLis
04-26-2014, 05:20 PM
Seabiscuit- Thanks for the hugs! :) Nice job on apologizing to the receptionist. Sometimes we feel bad about our actions, but refuse to apologize for our actions. I'm sure it was hard to do, but it leads to a wonderful feeling.

Fiona- Thanks for the welcome. :) When I finally came to terms with taking my medication a few years ago, that was exactly how I kinda came to grips with it. I'm more me with the medication than without it.

Ibelieveinme- Thank you for the wonderful welcome. That welcome font is awesome, so.... Welcoming! Thank you also for sharing of your loss. Knowing others who have suffered child loss and seeing how they have experienced it gives my husband and I strength. I'm glad you too found strength in our faith. It is very comforting to me. I went to confession today and I mentioned to the priest that my faith and prayer life have been strengthened since our loss. This has been something I've wanted to happen for a long time (deepening faith, dedication to prayer, etc) and he said something that I have truly felt.. He said that God was using this loss to strengthen my faith and prayer life. It made me so happy to hear this type of confirmation in a way. We spent a day and a half with her while I was in the hospital, but she has had such a large impact on our lives.

Glad to hear you had an amazing vacation!

Fiona W
04-26-2014, 05:27 PM
I had a rough night. Despite being monumentally exhausted from clipping magazines, I was too keyed up to get to sleep, and then, after getting up and reading then trying again, without success, I slipped into severe depression pain between 4 and 4:30 AM. At that point I was not in bed, but downstairs on the couch. It started gradually with thoughts along the lines of doom, death, despair, disaster, destruction (I'm very aware of negative associations with the letter D), and then suddenly escalated into that whole-body pain that's like the worst experience of acute grief you've ever had. I started vocalizing, as I always do when the pain is that bad, but I kept my mouth closed so it was just low moans that wouldn't wake up Bob. I took some Geodon, but it didn't help. I took a Clonapin, hoping it would put me to sleep, but it didn't. I took more Geodon. I was sitting on the edge of the couch—rocking, panicky, sweating like mad, not knowing what to do. There never is anything to do. Finally, around 6 AM, I fell asleep. An hour and a half of that level of pain is...well, if you've ever been there, and I sincerely hope you haven't, you'll know how long a time that was.

I slept 'til about 10 or 11, I don't remember. I woke up feeling OK, not even mildly depressed, but very weak, and fragile. I've been clipping my way through a stack of magazines...but slowly, cautiously, without the usual rock-n-roll to set the tempo. As soon as I began to feel tired, I took my afternoon break.

I have no idea what set that off, or how to steer clear of it tonight. I'm getting enough calories and eating my daily muesli, so it's not the diet. Just stress from the BERP, I assume—self-imposed stress from this upheaval in my life, this complete departure from my normal life. I don't want to cut back on the BERP any more than I already have. Tomorrow is my day off.

I do think that getting more exercise, moderate exercise like walking, would help me weather the stress better. My 600 leg lifts a night just aren't enough. But I couldn't bear to go outside today, despite how lovely the weather is. I just feel too fragile.

Anyway, sorry to go on like this about myself again, but that episode has me frightened...I will carry on, at a moderate pace, and tomorrow I get to rest, maybe make a collage, do whatever I want all day long.

How odd and yet how reassuring it is, that I never once thought of eating carbos, let alone sugar. It's just not on my list of options anymore. I'm living proof that it really only takes a few months to unlearn a lifetime's worth of bad habits. The brain is malleable, and it does change when you change your behavior! =smile=

seabiscuit
04-26-2014, 07:05 PM
Hi there everyone,

FleurDeLis- Thank you for your kind and encouraging words, that was very touching.

Thank you to others who are so supportive here. I'm a bit tired otherwise I would reply personally.

I'm glad to have a quiet weekend here at home.

Take care!

Amy

VermontMom
04-27-2014, 03:53 PM
The no sugar thing really hasn't been that hard, surprisingly. I still crave a coke occasionaly, and I made my little brother let me smell his ice cream sandwich the other day, but on a day by day basis it has been really easy.

:rofl: how did I miss this the other day :D

IBelieveInMe2
04-27-2014, 07:10 PM
Thank you for the kind "Welcome Back"s! :D It is harder than I thought it would be to get back on board with healthy eating and smaller portions. We went to a sled hockey banquet for our daughter today and I ate too much food and even some dessert. :o Yesterday, I felt hungry all day long..... but tried to make decent food selections. I took our 3 dogs a long walk with my hubby, which felt good. But I need to get my eating in check if I am going to lose the weight I so want to lose.

Fi: Thank you for explaining the BERP again. So sorry to hear about your rough night. The pain you described sounds just awful. :( I have not experienced much physical pain from depression; usually just mental and emotional. That is bad enough. I can only imagine having physical pain mixed in. :( Hope you are feeling much less fragile when you read this. Great that you did not even think of carbs or sugar during that whole stressful time!

Holly: I appreciate all of the :dust: you sprinkled on me. Please keep it coming! ;) Your exercises sound difficult. Anything Jillian Michaels scares me!

Sabrina: It is amazing how knowing someone for such a short time can change your life forever! Did you name your little girl? Our son was named Sean. I treasure the 28 weeks (in utero) and 14 hours (after birth) that we had him in our lives. We were able to see lots of ultrasounds of our twins since it was a high-risk pregnancy. I am happy and thankful for that. Though our little ones lived so briefly, their lives had meaning and they will live forever in our hearts! :hug:

worththeeffort2: Keep up with your cardio and your hard work WILL pay off! "They" say that when you lose weight at a slow pace, you are more likely to keep it off, for what that is worth. "They" also say to get rid of your "fat clothes" ~ but I did that and regretted it when I (unfortunately) regained all of the weight I had lost (and more). I had to buy new, bigger clothes AGAIN, which really s*cked!!! It was expensive, time-consuming, and depressing. :( Just my 2 cents!

MonteCristo: That cracked me up, too, when you said that you "made" your little brother let you "smell his ice cream sandwich!" Hahahahahaha!!! :lol: At least that SNIFF was calorie-free!!! :D

Waving hello to everyone else! :wave: Here's to a healthy week ahead!

FleurDeLis
04-27-2014, 07:38 PM
worththeeffort- I know it's something I can do if I have to, but I think the main issue is that I don't want to do it. I'm handling being around children better (I don't cry when I see them anymore), but I get pretty sad and depressed. :/ I know I don't want to do this job long term. I don't have a choice, as we need to pay the bills, so I will go back. I'm sure it will result in a lot of sadness and depression. I have some job leads, so I'm positive.

Fiona- So sorry to hear about your rough night. I had never heard about that sort of depression where it actually causes pain. I'm so sorry you have to go through that. I hope you enjoy your day of and get to relax.

Ibelieveinme- Her name is Isabelle Francis. She truly has changed her father and I. We couldn't be more grateful that God blessed us to have her in our lives for 38 weeks(in utero). We only had the standard two ultrasounds, but while we were in the hospital, we took many pictures with our camera. Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep (an organization where volunteer photographers take professional pictures of you and your deceased child for free) also came and took photographs of us. We will be getting those in the mail sometime this week. I'm so excited to see them!!!!!!!!!!

I know you will get back on track in regards to your eating with no problem!

worththeeffort2
04-28-2014, 06:11 AM
Sabrina/FleurDeLis: Prayers are coming your way. I hope the pictures of your precious angel Isabelle help to bring you peace. As a surviving sibling of a stillborn child, I'm glad you named your daughter. My mother refused to name her daughter so all my life, I've had a sister with no name. It is strange to not be able to refer to her as anyone but "My sister."

Today is wet and raw. Spring certainly is taking its time arriving this year. I wish, wish, wish I could just lay on the couch and do nothing all day today but I need to go to work. I have a feeling this is going to be a long week.

VermontMom
04-28-2014, 07:40 AM
Hello friends!

:wave:
Kathleen
Sabrina
Ohio
Seabiscuit
Chelsea
lilturtle
Fi
worththeeffort2
Monte Cristo
projectjudi
1life2liv
alita
I hope I didn't forget anyone!

Fi, I am so sorry to hear of your awful night! I hope the next day you were able to rest and are back to somewhat normal :)

Kathleen, I have more :dust::dust::dust: for you, me, and anyone else who needs it :D I have remembered your words to me, that we need to do what we know, to get the results we want! We can do it!!

wortheeffort2, I wish you could take today off too :) Hope your day goes smoothly .

Hello to everyone else :cool:

we had the most dreary weekend, weather-wise. Today the sun is shining for now, and supposed to get up to 54 (wow :rolleyes: ) this afternoon, I will use that as my incentive to do productive things until then and then I'll get on my bike :scooter:

I realize I forgot to take my one Wellbutrin tablet yesterday, I am so glad that it doesn't mess me up terribly if I forget a day or two.

I hope everyone has a good day and I look forward to hearing from you all!

Fiona W
04-28-2014, 10:13 AM
I had a good day yesterday, a really good day. Since it was Sunday, it was my day off from working on the BERP. (i'll explain once again that it stands for Big Entropy Reduction Project, in my house—I could also call it the Big Paper Removal Project, but BPRP is hard to pronounce. =laugh= I'm a collage artist, the old-fashioned kind where your only tools are paper, scissors, & glue, so naturally I hoard paper. My husband and I also hoard books, so getting rid of lots of books is also part of the BERP.) In the morning I wrote part of a letter in French to my Belgian friend, Robine, but soon the itch to make art became too strong to resist, so I spent the rest of the day happily ensconced in my collage room. I have a new piece most of the way done, but it needs some finishing touches I'll do today.

And then, around 6 PM, our niece Margaret and her 7-yr-old son Gavin arrived, our weekly get-together with them. While Gavin played computer games in Bob's office, Margaret helped me kick off an ancillary project to the BERP, which is that of sorting all the clipped images I'm generating as I plow through magazines into a nice set of twenty boxes I bought at the Container Store. The boxes are all different colors and two different sizes: they're all quite large but short, so they slot nicely into a set of bookshelves, and I've put labels on them like "People" and "Plants" and "Planet Earth" and "Purple" and so on—ten boxes for different image categories and ten boxes for different colors & patterns.

We had a good time sorting away, each of us working from a two-inches-thick stack of clipped images, laughing as we learned how to make all the decisions involved. For example, does a cool-looking black-&-white pattern of marbles go in the box labeled "Little Things" or the one labeled "Black & White"? We went for the latter choice.

It was especially fun for me to fantasize about how fabulous it will be to take down the boxes from the shelves and look for images in them, once they're all nicely stuffed with clippings. Margaret is such a good buddy to me: we think a lot alike about art and fashion, visual imagery in general, and we love each other very much.

And then, for dinner, we ordered pizza as usual, with a big Greek salad for me. Mmmmm...feta cheese, red onions, kalamata olives, those cute wrinkly pale green peppers, and lots of crunchy fresh lettuce. I do love me some Greek salad! I never even consider having a slice of pizza anymore: it's so much not a food that I eat, it doesn't even look like food to me. Yay!!

Now, darn it, I've written so much, I don't have time to give personal greetings, because I really need to start my work on the BERP for the day! Later, I promise. Know that I am thinking about y'all and rooting for you to make healthy choices, as I sit with my scissors and the next big stack of magazines.

And worththeeffort2, I think your swimsuit is just smashing! I love black-&-white, and that's a very nice pattern—looks like palm tree fronds and other tropical vegetation... =smile=

MonteCristo
04-28-2014, 10:16 AM
Hi All!

I had a great weekend. Thankfully after that little blip earlier in the week I made a few adjustments to my routine to keep from forgetting my meds again. Now they sit right next to my contacts...no way I'll forget now! Anyway, so I was pretty much back to "normal" by Friday. Friday evening is pizza and movie night, so I always go over to my Dads.

Aside from my "issues" I haven't really introduced myself much, so I guess I will now. I have a pretty big family, I'm the oldest of nine kids, and we were/are all homeschooled. My parents are divorced, and my mom moved away, so Dad is raising / homeschooling all the kids himself. We are all really close so I spend a lot of time over there. The oldest of my sisters is grown and lives in Texas, and the next one is a sophmore in college an hour away from us, but all the rest of the kiddos (18-7) are all still at home. I tend to just say "the kids" and people get confused and think I have a bunch of kids, but I'm just talking about my siblings. I'm an accountant and I live with my two cats Lyla & Alexei and my dog Sydney. My dad has a big real estate rental business that I grew up working in, and I'm currently building up my own.

Ok, so back to the weekend. So I had a great time at home watching movies and eating pizza (I will not give up pizza ever, ever, ever! lol). Saturday was the most productive day I've had in months. First thing in the morning I had to change out the burner element on a range for one of my tenants. Then I spend several hours in my yard getting it all cleaned up for spring. Took ages because I hadn't done anything for months, but it looks beautiful now. Of course, Sydney loved being outside with me. After I fninshed the yard and Sydney and I were chilling on the deck, another tenant called and said their A/C was out (it is always something, lol). So after a bit of digging around in the electrical system (and a long troubleshooting call with my Dad) I figured out that the transformer had failed. Replaced that, and A/C was as good as new! By the end of the day I was pretty worn out (and it was like 100 degrees in that attic where I was working), but it felt so good to get that much done. I have back and neck issues that usually cause me a lot of trouble, and yardwork is one thing that really sets it off, but amazingly I haven't had any pain!

So I was so pumped up from Saturday that I ended up waking up like 6am on Sunday (I'm a sleep until noon kind of person) ready to work on the flower beds in the front yard...and it was pouring rain. :( So I cooked up a meal for this weeks lunches and had a nice long snuggle with my pets. Then I always spend Sunday afternoon at home with the kids. And we watched youtube videos of cats for ages, which was pretty fun.

So all in all, I'm feeling about the best I've felt in months right now. Oh, and I'm down another 1/2 pound. :D

Sydney - 3yo lab mix
http://i59.tinypic.com/5mmpvs.png

Alexei (L) & Lyla (R) - 3yo Amercian Shorthair Silver tabbies
http://i59.tinypic.com/2pquc5s.png

Sorry this post ended up so long...I guess I was just in a sharing mood this morning!

VermontMom
04-28-2014, 12:29 PM
Fi - I'm so glad you had a good day with your niece and nephew, and your niece helping you is great :)

Monte Cristo - thanks for telling us about yourself! And <gasp> you can replace a transformer?! That is so kewl! :cool: I am so impressed :cool: and thanks for the pics of your fur babies, I do like cats but am def a dog lover too and the lab is sooo sweet looking.

Warmer here today and not raining, YAY. The weekend was miserable, cold and wet. So I have to make myself get out there and do yard work, it is not sunny, it's 50 degrees and overcast but I can work in that. Really wanted some more sun if I get out on my bike, maybe that will happen.

My exercise today was from Fitness Blender, http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/workout-detail/Fat-Burning-Cardio-Workout-37-Minute-Fitness-Blender-Cardio-Workout-at-Home/fg/

lilturtle
04-28-2014, 02:52 PM
Thanks everyone for all the comments. I am reading along with everyone and thinking of you all.

I had a good weekend. I did a lot of reading and some other fun activities. I didn't sleep much Saturday night, so Sunday I was exhausted all day but I got a good night's sleep last night. I find when I don't sleep I am hungrier. So sleep is important to weight loss. There is a connection I believe. Nothing much planned for this week. This time next week I will be close to boarding that plane to go see my mom. It'll be nice to go down there for a couple of weeks. I will be hitting the pool for sure down there. We walk in the water and then float in the deep end on noodles. The walking is still good exercise. I sitll have trouble walking on land. I don't walk right (with a limp due to arthritis in my knees) and it makes my back hurt rather quickly. So far the weight I have lost has made no difference in it. I can still only make it like a block on land before I really need to sit down. God, that is so embarrassing to admit. I'm so fat I can't walk like a normal person. It has prevented me from getting much exercise. Hopefully with more weight lost that will change.

VermontMom
04-28-2014, 04:11 PM
lilturtle, I surely hope that as you lose more, you will reap the benefits of less pain while walking :)

Well this is called the Ups and DOWNS right ??!! so I have to vent please. I am the ONLY one in this household who can bear to throw anything away..or reuse it to someone who will use it, or realize that something hasn't been touched in YEARS and can get it out of the friggin house. I am so friggin steamed at my husband; the items in particular are two outdoor smokers, the kind of cylinder ones on legs and wheels, well they haven't been used in at least 4 or 5 years, they are rusted, WEEDS have grown over them, we use a smaller grill for cooking.

and the other item is a gas powered snowthrower, it was a heavy duty one that cost $1000 from Sears but kept breaking down and we haven't used it in 3 years. it just sits on the lawn, covered by a tarp, i have to mow around it and it's an eyesore. So I boldly suggested that I call the local people who haul junk cars, to come and take those items, the smokers and teh snowthrower. YOu'd think I'd suggested selling our children!!

"Those were expensive" he says..duh, I know, I work too, but we're not using them and they're in teh way and have been for years! "Well, someone might buy them, if we put them at the top of the driveway" Um, I am not going to hang out by a window all day waiting to see if someone comes and just takes them or something.

So I am soooo pissed because I am the one who identifies the problem, and wants to take action but he just comes up with arguments, excuses, and no way would he do the work involved. and it reinforces that this has gone on for years, our storage area is jammedd with CRAP and it kills him to see it taken care of, so I try to do it when he's not here, and that's not fair to me.

whew.

worththeeffort2
04-28-2014, 08:43 PM
Holly: I totally empathize with you. Honestly, if it was me, I would probably go ahead and call the junk collector. You might even get some money out of the things in scrap metal. They may have been expensive but they're junk now. My mother is a hoarder so I grew up dealing with the issue. As a result, I have a six month rule. If something hasn't been used for six months, it can be tossed or donated. The only things that escape this rule are books!

Thanks, Fiona!

MonteCristo, your kitties are beautiful! I'm a real cat person but I do love all animals. There's nothing like a happy, purring kitty, though. :)

Today has been a down day for me. I did manage to force myself to do 30 minutes on the elliptical tonight but honestly, I feel like crap. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day.

ohiofreespirit
04-28-2014, 08:53 PM
Hello ladies,


I have had a few relaxing days here. I am off school for a week, it starts up next week. I am taking 2 classes next session. I am excited and nervous.

I work early in the morning at 6 am, so I have to get up at 5 am.

My moods have been pretty good and my anxiety has been under control too so things here have been good. I still have a bad day now and then but they are rare, thank goodness.

I got behind on my car payment and my car insurance. Instead of sitting around and worrying about it, making myself sick with worry. I picked up the phone and called both of them. I made arrangements to catch up on my payments. It just goes to show home important it is to be proactive instead of inactive.

I hope this post finds you all well. Much love to all.

Fiona W
04-28-2014, 11:53 PM
If anyone's interested, I made a collage about the BERP (https://www.flickr.com/photos/fi_webster/14055313141/), this spring house-organizing activity of mine. Enjoy! =smile=

IBelieveInMe2
04-29-2014, 12:06 AM
I had written a long post with the start of personals, but it got lost in Cyberspace at the accidental click of a button, so here goes my 2nd try.

I picked up my new prescription orthotics (for plantar fasciitis) today and used them while walking on the treadmill tonight for 30 minutes. My feet were a bit sore afterward, but I have high hopes that these orthotics will help to "cure" my plantar fasciitis. They felt pretty good as I walked at a slower pace than usual. I need to slowly break them in. I stepped on the scale hesitantly this morning, since I didn't eat as healthy on vacation, and I have LOST 2 more pounds!!! :D :carrot: I will take it! I think that the thyroid med I began taking late March is helping me to not be so darn weight loss resistant..... finally! Thank God!!!

Sabrina: Isabelle Francis is a beautiful name! (insert hearts) I am so glad that you were able to spend much time with her in the hospital and get lots of photos of all 3 of you. Hope the photos are a wonderful keepsake that will help with your grieving process and healing process. Be patient with yourself as you grieve. 18 years later, I can't say that the pain ever fully goes away, but it does become more manageable with the passage of time. But it was definitely the most difficult heartache of my lifetime (and I've had some doozies!). Please feel free to talk/write about her whenever you want or need to! :hug:

worththeeffort2: Sorry about your sad experience of a stillborn sibling and that she never had a name. :( I am also sorry to hear that you had a down day today. Hope tomorrow is a better one for you! Good for you for managing to get 30 minutes in on the elliptical despite feeling like crap!

Fi: So, so HAPPY to hear that you had a really good day yesterday!!! :D

Trish No shame in admitting that just walking is difficult at times. I hope things get less painful for you as you CONTINUE to lose weight! YOU CAN DO IT!!! :)

Holly: Sorry about your frustration with your hubby. I am usually the one who wants to "save" everything in our family, so it actually helps me to hear your venting. Gives me another perspective. I am finally to the point that I WANT to get rid of lots of stuff; now I just need to follow through and DO it! I am actually IN PROCESS of working with my organizer (still; ongoing) to do just that. Good luck dealing with this! Vent all you want! And THANK YOU for all of the :dust:!!! ;)

MonteCristo: Love your photos of your pup and kitties!!! How do you keep the kittens apart? They look so much alike! Glad to hear that you had a great weekend. Thanks for sharing more about yourself and your family.

ohiofreespirit: Good for you for being PROactive instead of INactive about your car payment and car insurance! It is a good lesson for us all. Enjoy your week off school!!! :)

VermontMom
04-29-2014, 08:06 AM
worththeeffort2 thank you for your comments about my venting :D Especially you have the memories of growing up with a hoarder. I wholeheartedly agree with a 6 month time period, excepting seasonal things of course.



Today has been a down day for me. I did manage to force myself to do 30 minutes on the elliptical tonight but honestly, I feel like crap. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day.

It's so great that you pushed yourself to do time on the elliptical even though you did not want to! I hope very much that today is better for you!! Is it, so far?

...I got behind on my car payment and my car insurance. Instead of sitting around and worrying about it, making myself sick with worry. I picked up the phone and called both of them. I made arrangements to catch up on my payments

Ohio, that is such a big thing isn't it!! Way to go on just taking the big step and facing something troublesome and just doing it and taking care of it and it turned out fine :D :carrot:

I know you still have to work but enjoy your week off from school :) And is your daughter coming home from college soon?


If anyone's interested, I made a collage about the BERP (https://www.flickr.com/photos/fi_webster/14055313141/), this spring house-organizing activity of mine. Enjoy! =smile=

That is really great! :D So..each of those printed images was cut from a magazine or book? the edges are so precise! And I meant to comment how huge it was, that even during your bad night and the next day, you did not even think about taking comfort in carbs :carrot:

I have LOST 2 more pounds!!! :D :carrot: I will take it! I think that the thyroid med I began taking late March is helping me to not be so darn weight loss resistant..... finally! Thank God!!!


WOW congrats on the 2 pounds GONE! that is such an awesome sight to see on the scale isn't it! and I sincerely hope the orthotics help your poor feet :hug: And thank you for your input on the clutter, I know you have offered your support even though I must seem like the enemy :rofl: Not 'enemy' but you know what I mean. I hope I didn't sound like a horrible person or at the very least a harsh person. I'm not usually, but it just .. deflated me because I thought I should be commended for taking control of clutter and I was feeling that a big concrete roadblock was being thrown my way.

Well I allowed my disappointment about DH's reaction, and then the gray, chilly day to put me in a crummy mood, the same 'what's the use' mentality, and overate yesterday out of anger; I really haven't done that for so long (eating with the thought that it's 'getting back' , when it's only hurting me instead of someone else). It was too chilly and overcast for me to want to get out on my bike, and it was all I could do to force myself to do about an hour of yardwork. It is nuts :rolleyes: for me to base my mood so much on the weather but I can't help it!

MonteCristo
04-29-2014, 09:30 AM
Holly - I completely understand your frustration about hanging on to things you don't use or need. I wouldn't call my family hoarders, but they certainly like to keep lots of stuff "just in case". I on the other hand am the complete opposite...I go through my entire house every few months and just look for stuff I can get rid of, cause if makes me happy, lol. This is probably not the best method, but when I was a teenager, I would go through the house an pick up stuff that I thought was junk and we didn't need, and I'd hide it for 6 months. If no one asked about it, then I'd throw it away. I don't know if you are to this point yet, but if you are ready to get rid of it, you can usually get scrap people to come get it themselves. You probably won't get any money out of it, but you will be rid of it. Thanks for the compliment about the repair...my Dads a master electrician and does all his own repairs on the houses, so I've been doing this stuff all my life and I don't even think about it that much. I think I started doing electrical and plumbing when I was 8 lol.

Ibelieveinme2 - Honestly, it is really easy for me to tell them apart. They have really different personalities and they carry themselves very different. But I do like having a matching pair. :) Glad you got orthotics and thyroid medication that is finally working for you. You much feel great about that!

Fiona - Lovely collage. I'm in awe of artistic people, I don't have an artistic bone in my body.

ohiofreespirit - Glad you are having a nice relaxing week, and that your anxiety level have decreased. And great job on being proactive with your financial situation. :)

worththeeffort2 - Thanks for the compliment on my cats. They really are special. Sorry you aren't feeling to good, but excellent job on working through and getting your exercise in anyway.

lilturtle - Walking may be difficult for you now, but the important thing is that you aren't letting it stop you. That is the important thing. And before you know it you will be able to walk all over! :)

Monday was another good day. Nothing special at work, but I was busy, which is just the way I like it. After work, as the ground was so nice an moist from all the rain, I decided to do some yard work. I have a really shady back yard, so I don't have much grass, and I've been wanting to basically landscape the whole thing with hostas and japanese mapples and other shade loving foliage plants for a while. So I set to work clearing out the grass and weeds from under the cedar tree where I plan to start a batch of pachysandra. Didn't take as long as I thought so after that I cleared a huge patch along side my patio and then ran off to Lowes to get some different types of hostas. I already have 3 types, but I found 3 different ones inclucing a special gigantic (grows 6ft) so I planted those around the patio. Not sure that is where I will want them eventually, but the idea was to get them in the ground as soon as possible so they can start growing. That way I can just divide them up and I won't have to keep paying for them!

FleurDeLis
04-29-2014, 03:01 PM
worththeeffort- Since before my husband and I were married we had two girl names and two boy names picked out for our children. When we found we were having a girl, she immediately became Isabelle Francis. We had such a short time to make memories with her. Hand molds, foot molds, etc. I also made sure she had her first haircut, though she was pretty bald, we were able to get a few little tufts of it to save.

Fiona- I really liked that collage as well as the others on that site. Very interesting. When you you are creating your collages, do you use only scissors to cut pictures or an exacto-knife?

Ibelieveinme- I'm so anxious to get the new pictures. It's like I'll be meeting her again! Ah, can't wait!!!! Thank you for the support.

Vermont- Sorry to hear you husband is resisting to dejunk. :/ I do the same thing, going around a few times a year and getting rid of the things we don't or haven't been using. My husband is really laid back and usually if we haven't used something in awhile, is ok with getting rid of it. I'm blessed! :)

So today I went to the gym and did some weight lifting. I'm also doing the c25k and did workout 2 of week one yesterday. Not as sore today as I was the day after the first workout, so that's awesome. After the gym today I swept the floors, emptied the dishwasher, cleaned the office (i.e. cleaned the cat box and swept up all the litter than my cat tracks throughout the office).

I have an appointment at 5pm to get my new tattoo. It is in honor of my daughter. Praying hands with a rosary. It will also have her name and the date she was born. It's been a long time coming.. for me anyways. I went to an artist and she has drug her feet on getting the design done. I mean she has taken like 4 weeks to draw this up. Very frustrating for me. I decided to go to a different artist yesterday and he got me booked for today. I'm very impressed and can't wait to finally get Isabelle immortalized on me. Each of my tattoos has deep meaning for me, but this one will be the most important of any tattoo I will ever get.

lilturtle
04-29-2014, 03:49 PM
Fiona - Love love love the collage. You are so talented and creative.

The whole walking thing is scaring me with my trip coming up. Airports are big and I still don't know exactly where I am going. Plus what if there is a long line for security. I'm working myself up again already. I just want that part of the trip to be over.

I am runing out of food for the month. I have some ground beef left I think. And a pork roast in the freezer. I have nothing to make the pork roast with. I went overboard buying pickles and carrots this month and didn't think of buying real food. I get these crazy ideas like only eating carrots and pickles. *sigh* Lesson learned. One can not survive a month of carrots and pickles. The next time I do my grocery shopping I need to think it through better.

Fiona W
04-29-2014, 08:41 PM
Thanks for all the kind words about my collage. Yes, all those images came from magazines or books, and in the case of that collage, mostly from my junk mail...I get a lot of scientific and medical junk mail from when I used to be a doctor, and I get a lot of catalogs: it's all free anyway, why not cut out the cool parts before I toss it in the recycle bin? Every time I run across something with visual appeal on the Web, I always check to see if a printed catalog is available for it.

I do 99.9% or more of my snipping with scissors, only very little with a craft knife. There were a couple of places in the bouquet the elephant's holding where there was blue sky showing through from the original background, so I used a knife to make those inside holes. I didn't used to be able to cut very neatly with scissors, but what they say is true: practice makes perfect!

The difficult thing, which was in fact the subject of that collage, is not just hoarding paper, but harvesting the images and storing them in an orderly way. That's what I'm working very hard on, even as you read these words, because I want my house to have lots of clean open spaces for those new kittens to run and play. The piles of paper clutter are on their way OUT!

VermontMom
04-29-2014, 08:42 PM
This is the face of a Happy biker!

seabiscuit
04-29-2014, 08:48 PM
Hello there everyone!

Thank you for your wave Holly! How are you?

I'm hanging in there! It was a grey and rainy day today, also quite chilly. I'm slowly getting ready for the move.

Take care and have a good night.

Amy

IBelieveInMe2
04-29-2014, 11:36 PM
I worked out with my trainer this morning and walked on the treadmill the previous two nights. I am trying to see myself as a more active person and it is helping, I think.

Holly: I absolutely LOVE that picture of you on your bike!!! :D You do look very happy! You didn't sound like a horrible or harsh person about the clutter at all! It actually helped me to hear someone else's perspective, because I always just think my hubby is being too hard on me when he loses his patience about the clutter in our house. It helps me to see it a little more objectively, if that makes any sense.

MonteCristo: Glad to hear that Monday was another good day and that you were able to get out and do some yard work. Your landscaping sounds beautiful!

Sabrina: I am not a big tattoo person, but the one you are getting sounds so special and unique for Isabelle. Good for you for getting to the gym and lifting weights. Good luck with the c25k!!!

Trish: When do you leave for your trip? You will do just fine with the walking in the airport. I hate that part of trips, too. Practice POSITIVE self-talk and you will get through it okay. I will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Hope your food supply holds out until you are able to shop again!

Fi: I just checked out your latest collage and it is so cool!!! Very visually appealing. You ARE indeed very talented. I love the elephant holding the flowers in his trunk! :) Good luck as you continue with your BERP!

Amy: Thanks for checking in. When is your big move? Good luck with the preparation!

Hello to Everyone Else!!! :wave: Please check in when you can, if only just to say hello!

MonteCristo
04-30-2014, 10:04 AM
I've been having some odd dreams, and it seems like they are connected to my anxiety. More background on me...the "family issue" that precipiated my anxiety issues and depression was my mom's sudden realization that she didn't have the life she wanted, so she wanted a divorce so she could start over. My Dad was shocked to say the least, and really fought her on it, so it was about two years from her realization until she finally filed for divorce and forced separation. Another two years of fighting where she used custody of the kids to get try and get a bigger settlement. All very traumatic for everyone involved as you can imagine. Anyway, I've been having dreams lately where she comes back, and I'm forced to leave. Which is weird because I haven't lived at home in over three years now. But it is really disturbing in the dream. I can't really imagine why I'm having these dreams. This would never happen in real life, my parents still venemously hate each other, and my Dad is engaged to someone else. I did talk to my sister in Texas last night, and we did commiserate together about the fact that our mom never contacts us unless she needs something, or really puts any effort into the relationship, so I guess that could of set it off. Or maybe because it is getting so much closer to my dad's remarriage. Times like this I think I may need a therpist. :(

FleurDeLis
04-30-2014, 11:03 AM
Very neat Fiona!

Love the pic Holly! I miss my bike! I still have my helmet, it's full face, flat black with a skull and cross bones on the back. I love it and even though I will probably never get another bike, I don't think I'll ever get rid of it, lol!

Ibelieveinme2- I drew my first tattoo when I was in high school and got it when I turned 18. It's a dreamcatcher in memory of my grandpa. Then a few years later I got the trail of tears symbol (indian hunched over sitting on a horse) They say once you get one, you get addicted and it's true for me. After getting the current one for Isabelle, I'm thinking of the next TWO pieces I want to get. I do make sure that each one has strong meaning for me and my life. I couldn't bear the thought of putting the Indianapolis Colts emblem on myself or something like that, lol!

Today I have my 6 week post partum appointment. Hoping everything is well and I'm fully cleared! I know I'm getting a blood draw (Yeeesh!) I know, crazy coming from a girl who just got a tattoo, but I absolutely dislike blood draws, though I learned to accept them throughout my pregnancy because I developed hypothyroidism and my levels constantly had to be checked. After I leave there I plan on swinging by the gym to do my day three week one c25k workout. Then home to finish the last few assignments for my Environment and Society class. My next class is some sort of government class... Ick! I'm going to be so incredibly BORED!!!! But apparently it is necessary in order for me to be a social worker... SO much wasted time and energy on things that don't matter..

pixelllate
04-30-2014, 11:15 AM
Thanks for all the kind words about my collage. Yes, all those images came from magazines or books, and in the case of that collage, mostly from my junk mail...I get a lot of scientific and medical junk mail from when I used to be a doctor, and I get a lot of catalogs: it's all free anyway, why not cut out the cool parts before I toss it in the recycle bin? Every time I run across something with visual appeal on the Web, I always check to see if a printed catalog is available for it.

I do 99.9% or more of my snipping with scissors, only very little with a craft knife. There were a couple of places in the bouquet the elephant's holding where there was blue sky showing through from the original background, so I used a knife to make those inside holes. I didn't used to be able to cut very neatly with scissors, but what they say is true: practice makes perfect!

The difficult thing, which was in fact the subject of that collage, is not just hoarding paper, but harvesting the images and storing them in an orderly way. That's what I'm working very hard on, even as you read these words, because I want my house to have lots of clean open spaces for those new kittens to run and play. The piles of paper clutter are on their way OUT!

Hi, I'm just popping in this thread (hello!!!) because I just wanted to say that I love reading your posts Fiona! I one day would like a side-job doing something creative. Just keeping it open, since I've worked with various mediums throughout the years. I am still on hiatus because of other priorities, but its something that I aspire to and I hope to be in a place in my life where I can develop a small side business. Maybe once I get that going, I can post some of the murals that I've worked on these past couple years - I just started exploring mural art and I really like it. :)

lilturtle
04-30-2014, 11:43 AM
This is totally nondiet related but was good news for me. I did a friend's taxes this year and they just got their refund. I wasn't expecting anything in return. It wasn't a complicated tax return anyways. But they are buying me a new phone. My old phone is slowly dying and I couldn't afford to replace it. So yay! A new phone. I should have it by Friday in time for my trip on Monday.

I need to update my ticker again. I lost a few more lbs. So big yay there too. Who knew....eat less, lose more really works for me.

VermontMom
04-30-2014, 12:19 PM
... That's what I'm working very hard on, even as you read these words, because I want my house to have lots of clean open spaces for those new kittens to run and play. The piles of paper clutter are on their way OUT!

thanks for explaining to us about the cutting, it seems so very precise but as you say practice has made perfect :D and yay for continuing on the reduction progress!


I'm hanging in there! It was a grey and rainy day today, also quite chilly. I'm slowly getting ready for the move.

Take care and have a good night.

Amy

Hi Amy, oh how I dislike grey, rainy and chilly days, they just nudge me into blehness. Do you have a deadline you have to meet, for moving? Say Hi to Snickers for me :D

I worked out with my trainer this morning and walked on the treadmill the previous two nights. I am trying to see myself as a more active person and it is helping, I think.


Yay for your exercise, Kathleen! :running: are the orthodics (spelling?) helping? I sure hope so. Oh and here's the obligatory dust for us :D :dust:
thanks for the happybikerchick comp :)

I've been having some odd dreams, and it seems like they are connected to my anxiety.(

sorry to hear of the dreams, they are sure to be reflecting emotions you have. That situation with your family was such an upheaval and how hard to get through that! I'm really sorry also to hear that your mom seems to only contact you when she wants something :( :( :( ...I was very impressed by hearing of your yardwork and it sounds like it is a beautiful sight to greet you and it was all accomplished by your hard work!


Today I have my 6 week post partum appointment. Hoping everything is well and I'm fully cleared! .

wow I know you told us of the date in March, but it has been such a short time hasnt it :hug: Wishing you a stellar health appointment :D OH, you must miss your bike so much!! when I had a fullface, my husband designed a cupcake/crossbones in retroreflective tape for the back :devil: This new helmet doesn't have any bling on it ...yet. I do have some crystals, and I always put a bullet hole sticker or two on them :rofl: (I once had a Canadian Border Patrol checkpoint guard say to me, in a thick French accent, "looks like somebody missed!" :devil: (regarding the fake bullet hole) And your planned tat sounds wonderful. I am one of the few biker chicks in the country that does not have a tat..yet :D

So yay! A new phone. I should have it by Friday in time for my trip on Monday.

I need to update my ticker again. I lost a few more lbs. So big yay there too. Who knew....eat less, lose more really works for me.

DOUBLE YAYS :carrot: So nice to get something unexpected, and so great to see more losses! About your trip, I wonder if you could google the airport, and check out, ahead of time, what kind of distance you have to go to get to your points? Maybe knowing ahead of time might help with anxiety.

and HI to everyone else :wave:

I'm sure glad I was outside for all of yesterday, because today is blech, and tomorrow is supposed to be blech also. I've did a workout (http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/workout-detail/1000-Calorie-Workout-HIIT-Cardio-Strength-Kickboxing-and-Abs-Workout-to-Burn-1000-Calories/gr/ ) and vacuumed; need to put away a hamper full of clothes; and need to work/research pastry recipes for my upcoming summer gig. The problem with that, is um, embarrassing, but my stomach starts growling when I am going through my cookbooks, and looking up recipes on the computer, and it is really hard to stick to my diet :devil: but I have to :dust:

IBelieveInMe2
04-30-2014, 01:15 PM
Hey Gals! I remembered that I saw a page when I was on vacation where you all showed photos of yourself, and I decided that ~ being your "fearless leader" according to Fi, I would post one, too. Let's see if I can do this.

46176

I think that worked. I tried to put a photo of me with my little family up, but it kept failing, so you will have to settle for me with my favorite Country/Rock Piano Man, Phil Vassar, from this past March. His music is the best and he is a wonderful entertainer..... and cute as a button, too! :D

So, I am having a lazy day. It is supposed to rain here in Ohio all week long. I miss the Florida sunshine!!! I have errands to do, but don't particularly want to do them in the rain, so I am here typing to all of you instead. ;) This is much more fun! :D I will work out at 4:30 pm today when I take my daughter to the trainer. She will work out with our trainer and I will most likely walk on the treadmill. Hoping the downward trend on my scale continues!!!

MonteCristo: I am so sorry you had that disturbing dream and that experience with your mom. I have some mother baggage from my past, but we are pretty close now (finally..... at the age of 47; she just turned 80). Moms should ALWAYS be there for their kids, in my opinion, so it is just wrong that she only contacts you when she wants something. I highly recommend getting a therapist to help you sort all of the "family issues" out without judgement or guilt. It has been such a HUGE help in my situation. No shame in that! Big hugs to you! :hug:

Sabrina: Sounds like you are the tattoo queen! :lol: I like how your tattoos have strong meaning behind each one. Have you received your photos yet??? I hope your 6-week post partum appointment goes well. That really IS such a short time since you went through such a traumatic experience. You seem to be coping well. Kudos to you..... and your faith! :hug:

pixelllate: Thanks for stopping by and posting! Neat that Fiona has a fan on board!

Trish: Congratulations on your new phone and on losing a few more pounds!!! :carrot: Perfect that you will have your new phone in time for your trip on Monday! See, it is all coming together. All will be well. :)

Holly: I think the orthotics are going to help my plantar fasciitis, but they feel strange right now and I have to break them in slowly, so I am only wearing them for short times at the moment. Time will tell. I am just glad that the plantar fasciitis hasn't been too terrible lately and that I have been able to get back on the treadmill. I like it so much better than the bike! :tread:

IBelieveInMe2
04-30-2014, 01:28 PM
I just wanted to remind everyone that tomorrow, May 1st, I will begin a new May 2014 thread for the Ups & Downs Support Group. Please look for it under Ups & Downs Support Group: May 2014. Please post and let us know that you made it to the new group. I do a new thread every month to keep one thread from getting too long and to try to keep the group organized. Hope it isn't too much of an inconvenience for everyone! See ya on the new thread! :)

VermontMom
04-30-2014, 01:38 PM
Kathleen - not an inconvenience at all and so glad you are 'on top of things' to help us :D

Thank you for your pic! you cute thang :) And I thought the gent was your hubby and didn't know how to politely say 'dang your husband is good lookin!' :D

Yes how kewl that Fi has fans! :cp:

worththeeffort2
04-30-2014, 08:58 PM
I've had a tough couple of days. Took myself for a walk and pep talk after supper tonight. I came home feeling better about things.

VermontMom
04-30-2014, 09:33 PM
I've had a tough couple of days. Took myself for a walk and pep talk after supper tonight. I came home feeling better about things.

really sorry to hear you've struggling :hug: vent if you need!

coffeeshopgirl
04-30-2014, 09:49 PM
Hi everyone. Just wanted to check in. Its been a while, and I've been kinda down. Lots of stress at the moment. But the good news is that I met my weight loss goal today = 175 lbs! Just wanted to share that with the room. I'll check in again soon :) hope all is well.

IBelieveInMe2
04-30-2014, 10:04 PM
Holly: You crack me up! :lol: Phil Vassar IS a real cutie and looks awesome in the cute jeans he wears!!! ;)

worththeeffort2: Sorry to hear that you had a tough couple of days. Good for you for giving yourself a pep talk! As Holly said, please feel free to vent if you need it. :hug:

coffeeshopgirl: Sorry to hear that you have lots of stress at the moment and have been kinda down. But CONGRATULATIONS on meeting your goal of 175 lbs!!! :carrot: Thanks for sharing your great news! :D Please watch for the May 2014 thread and feel free to post there and keep in touch! Best of luck to you with keeping the weight loss rolling! :)

I will post the new May 2014 thread at midnight or in the morning! Stay tuned..... :comp: