[onebyone]

Hello.

Oh I could just hug all you guys out there
<---- That's the best I can do.

thankyouthankyouthankyou for being here. I am so happy to be understood.

I managed to clean up my place yesterday morning for a maintenance inspection by the management here in the complex I live in. I am a terrible housekeeper. Terrible. But I did what was needed and in the process I truly liberated my kitchen table! And the bonus is that the stovetop is shiny and clean. Wow. I am about to have a sit down breakfast at my kitchen table and I have a lunch date in the same place before I am off to school. Amazing. I feel hopeful. I am planning on a big weekend with some new rubbermaid bins and the spare bedroom, moving stuff from about 15 broken and battered cardboad boxes and into bins, or onto shelves or into garbage bags. That's the goal.

Today is Day 9 Get Moving. I was actually working out fairly regularly but I slacked off over the last two weeks so today, on the occasion of Day 9, I did my 2mi WATP DVD and have written down that I will get to the Y over the weekend for a water aerobics class on Saturday and Sunday morning. I LOVE water aerobics and I never do it. Go figure.

I deserve credit for not having second helpings last night, and for eating sitting down. And today I deserve it for making a plan!

Thank you everyone for the help dealing with messing up and then beating yourself up about it. I appreciate it so much.

Have a fantastic Friday.

[kuhljeanie]

Good (hopefully better!) morning all! You know, it may sound counterintuitive, but Onebyone ,I really appreciate what you've written. When I fall off the wagon the last thing I want to do is document it for other people to read, because I'm also operating under the perfectionist mentality. I want to eat perfectly on plan, I want to exercise every second I've planned out for it, I want to feel good all the time, and I want to be the one reassuring and helping other people when THEY fall off the wagon. I wonder if at the heart of it, it's a control issue? Anyway, I'm guessing more of us struggle with perfectionism here than not. And fall harder when we don't live up to our own inhuman standards. When we're doing everything "right", it's easy to feel good about ourselves. It occus to me that the healthy place between the extremes of diet perfection and out of control or mindless bingeing happens when we love ourselves regardless of our behavior. Somewhere along the way I decided I could earn more love and acceptance by doing more or better, and even though that's absolutely not true for my family, my husband, or my friends (who love me just because I'm me, imagine that) it's true for myself. I gotta learn to love me even when I eat unplanned dessert, don't manage to get that 3 mile run in. Or bomb a midterm. Or let my house get messy. Or don't make all the party food perfectly, from scratch. You get the idea. So thank you, and HUGE credit for posting what you did. The more I think about it the more I realize that I was paying lip service to it before but didn't understand what those extremes really mean. It's conditional love for yourself, which just isn't good enough.

Hey Bill! Sounds like you're on the beginning of a real tear. Good for you! Before you know it, you'll be dumping all kinds of crap you don't want in your body. It actually feels pretty good once you get into it. Like eating dark chocolate feels good once you get into it. Right, Heidi? Every couple of months I like to clean out some area of my house that's become overrun with stuff I no longer want or need. I love that clean feeling. Perhaps we can apply the same thinking to our bodies!

And Hafowler, no need to "confess" to a thing! I'm in agreement with Heidi (I think it was Heidi - sorry if it was someone else who replied in kind!) I credit my insane schedule and never being home with forcing me to stick like glue to my plan. If I was home during the day, who knows how much I'd be eating? I'm not saying that I won't appreciate the extra time when I'm done with school (9 weeks now, but who's counting) but working from home is only an advantage if you're able to make it one. Which apparently you are. You go on with your bad self.

Off to the doc's (just a regular checkup.) I haven't had once since before I got pregnant, so here's to hoping that all my bloodwork comes back healthy, and I've got my pre-hypertension under control.

Happy Friday, everyone! Wendy, Onebyone, feel better soon! Like Bill said, it's all temporary. Truly and existentially. (Which reminds me - has anyone heard from Erika lately?)

Cheers,
Jeanie

[barbpos]

Hey all.

Still going pretty strong. Today is day 12 for me....not doing the exercise...I've fasted for religious reasons annually for the past 39 years so I know what it feels like, I'm hypoglycemic, and I'm comfortably moving along with South Beach, eating 3 meals and 3 snacks....and the big success is that there has not been a single day with more than 3 snacks, all planned. I'm also not going to make my decision not to do the exercise a big rebellion or a reason to reject the rest of Beck...this is progress too.

(so, now you know I'm 52 years old and Jewish.....)

A couple of challenges/new situations since doing Beck are coming up this weekend....a potluck dinner tonight, and synagogue tomorrow. In both situations many people eat standing, and there will be foods that I'm not eating. My plan for the potluck is: 1 plate of food, with choices focused on protein and vegetables, eaten sitting down. A small serving of seconds, if I'm so inclined, but only salad or plain vegetables. I my plan for synagogue is just one plate of food, food as close to SBD straight and narrow as is reasonably possible (probably smoked fish, humus, vegetables, fresh fruit)

Also, I have a confession. I've been eating some of my food in my car. Even though I'm technically seated, I know it's not the kind of undistracted situation which allows for mindful eating....so NO MORE. I don't remember her discussing eating in the car at all in the book, but I know I'm not the only who does it.....look at all those fast food drive-throughs!

Knee is better. I've been exercising, but with some modification (less incline on the treadmill, skipping the offending machines at Curves).

Had my echocardiogram yesterday. Cardiologist appointment next Wednesday. Mood has been variable this week....fear, some lows, today pretty good.

Thanks for listening.

[coastalsue]

Happy upcoming weekend to all,

Yeah-lost another lb-finally 70 off and now 1/3 of the extra fat is off. I certainly am the tortoise in the race to get rid of the lbs off but I'll reach the finish line one of these days.

Had a day long workshop-no time for swimming and mountains of candy and bake goodies about the tables-cruel, cruel-did have a very small portion of one baked good-credit I then stopped! I think if the tiny piece had never been there I would have resisted. Never would have touched one of the hugh cookies/muffins-but thought i heard my name being called by the small sliver of one muffin. Yeah- not to go mindless due to feeling a bit trapped and bored and very food stimulated being around so many folks eating so many treats.

I think that Beck keeps emphasizing the importance of credit because as group I bet many overweights feel so critical of ourselves-Many folks feel that they need/have the right to make a negative comment about my size-there are so many study about how society can feel so negatively toward the overweight. I now look at overeating a unhealthy coping pattern I am changing but it is not a sign of my moral weakness nor intellectual abilities. Anyway you all keep giving yourself alot of credit for changing such ingrained habits.-my 2 cents for today. Ain't easy to change but so necessary.

BillBlueeyes-keep hearing you letting go of implusive food habits-It is the old role to finish the bit of food left over-to small to save yet no one else wanted just because they were full. For me it is even letting go of the guilt of "wasting" it really is just the material to increase my waist and trash my own body.

A big Hi to everyone-fun healthy weekend, have plans for tonight so most run

sue

[wendylan]

Hello everyone,I am feeling better today and have been following my ww core plan for Thur and Fri.It is snowing here so no chance to get to the Y for a swim but should be able to get there Sat afternoon.Finally feeling better after the flu episode and got back to work Thur and Fri..Still have not found my cards but have begun to rewrite cards and reread my book,I find new insights every time I reread.
Costalsue-Great job!another pound gone forever and a great time resisting the baked goods.
barbpos-Sounds like a solid plan for your potluck dinner and good insight that eating in the car may not help with focus.
kuhljeanie-Thanks for the reminder that our moods are just temporary,I am feeling better today physically and emotionally.I can identify with the perfectionistic attitude also and by the way my house is very messy and here I sit on the computer.
onebyone-Great job doing your WATP and planning for a water aerobics for Sat.I exercise at the Y also swimming laps or taking water fitness class,?I will be at the Y Sat also.I have a WATP too but dogs get under my feet too much.My house needs major organization also.
BillBlueEyes-Wonderful job with the leftover crackers and lentil vegetable soup sounds great.I moved on to try barley veg beef soup[I made off the box] and liked it on my grain journey,yet to try lentils.
hbuchwald-"Kudos to myself for taking great care of myself."Your quote,I love it and feel I need to add it to my cards if you don't mind!

[hbuchwald]

Hi friends,
I lost another pound today too-now I have lost 45 lbs! WOW! I wanted to reward myself and bought an inexpensive dvd/vcr player for my room. I now need to hook up my daughters portable dvd player in the living room to play an exercise dvd so this is a treat for myself for that and also just to be able to watch a movie in there periodically.

CoastalSue: I hope that I come to prefer dark chocolate-I LOVE milk chocolate and have forever so that is hard to imagine. Exciting about losing the pound but yes, you are right-probably muscle being formed. You are exercising so much…. I am trying so hard not to focus on that number but on how great I feel and how much more energy I have. It is nice to see the numbers on the scale move down too though I have to say!

Wow-two lbs! Does it go in waves for you? It does for me. I almost think that I need to plateau to get used to the new weight and then gear up for losing again???? Slow and steady is the way to go for permanent weight loss! What a great way to look at eating-as a coping strategy. It really is uplifting to give oneself credit for the good stuff. It changes the focus from a product success (weight loss) to a process success (behaviors that promote weight loss).

BillBlueEyes: I completely relate with the crackers at the bottom of the bag thing and the feeding frenzies of the past. Big kudos to you! Yes, I know that my chocolate preferences are not terribly refined… give me a reeses or a Hershy bar and I am happy…In response to your response to hafowler and how it is so great to savor our food..I was just saying to someone today who asked me how the “healthy eating thing is going”…I feel so satisfied with the food I am eating. I don’t feel like I am on a diet-but truly wanting to eat the food that I make for myself. I really cannot believe that-I have never felt so “integrated” with the cooking/eating healthfully/overall, taking good care of myself deal.

Onebyone-Big congrats on unburying your kitchen table. That makes a big difference in ambience when eating. I have a young daughter (5 yrs old) and we cleared off the dining room table and got a pretty table cloth and a candleholder and eat dinner in there by candlelight with cloth napkins. My goal was to have that special time with her, teach her manners but mostly just to make mealtime a nice experience. Way to take control over the working out! Water aerobics are so fun and have come so far with the webbed gloves and floatie things that people wear. I need to dig up my pool schedule to see if I can make it periodically to a class like that.

Kuhljeanie: I love cleaning stuff out too-have you seen the flylady woman’s book called “Body Clutter”? She goes by that concept-that we are holding on to “stuff” that we need to let go of… makes sense in many ways. Good luck at your appt!

Barpos: Great planning for the potluck! You really sound like you are doing the beck stuff and taking care of yourself!

[BillBlueEyes]

This discussion continues on The Beck Diet Solution – March 2008 – Group for Support, Discussion, Diet Coach

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Completed Beck Program-day 42. You’ve Met your goal. Congratulations!