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Old 01-22-2002, 02:26 PM   #1  
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Talking Turtle Club #50

Hi, Turtle Buddies,

Here it is - my "official" version of the fable:

The Hare and the Tortoise

A hare met a tortoise one day and made fun of him for the slow and clumsy way in which he walked.

The tortoise laughed and said, "I will run a race with you any time that you choose."

"Very well," replied the hare, "we will start at once."

The tortoise immediately set off in his slow and steady way without waiting a moment or looking back. The hare, on the other hand, treated the matter as a joke and decided to take a little nap before starting, for she thought that it would be an easy matter to overtake her rival.

The tortoise plodded on, and meanwhile the hare overslept herself, with the result that she arrived at the winning-post only to see that the tortoise had got in before her.

Moral: Slow and steady wins the race.

This comes from a book handed down from my grandmother to my mother to me. The book is so old it doesn't have a copyright date or an author/editor's credit.

That fable has been the motivation for us turtles for about two years. Someone on the ancient WW forum mentioned the fable and I discovered it was very motivational for me. I talked about it in posts and other people said that the tortoise philosophy worked for them, too. So, I started a thread for us turtle types.

We work toward accepting that our bodies have a natural speed of weight loss when we choose to live a healthy life, instead of "going on a diet". Many of us have experienced "the diets" as go on/lose weight-- go off/ gain the weight plus more back.

We choose to perservere with each choice we make throughout the day. We believe that choosing to be slow, steady turtles helps us to learn the skills we need to learn in order to not only lose the weight, but keep it off and become the healthiest people we can be.

So, welcome to all who realize that losing and maintaining a weight loss is a lifestyle change. And who want support as we all learn the skills we need to successfully make the changes that will allow us to reach our goals.

Happy turtlin', everyone!

Lin
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Old 01-22-2002, 02:56 PM   #2  
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Hi Guys,
I posted a wonderful post yesterday LOL and lost it because I was impatient and clicked my mouse before it had fully loaded.
Then I was ticked and signed out. Real mature!
In any case, I am reading your posts and wishing you all well.

Lauren,
Wonderful to wear an XL blazer just like that! As far as your weight, look at how far you've come. You've had a great run.
You are exercising and doing all sorts of wonderful things for yourself. If this week was a little high, you know what to do. I'm sending you OP vibes to keep you going.

Lin,
I'm sending OP vibes and sympathy vibes to you and your situation with your brother. It's wonderful that you are not allowing your depression to interfere with what you want most--which is staying OP and doing the right thing for yourself as far as your changing and improving lifestyle.

Mousie,
Always good to hear from you. Glad things have settled down a little with you and your dh.

Everyone,
I'm doing quite okay. This last week I ate more salt than usual because we ate out more than we have been doing. I have stayed off the scale which is major for me. I have not gotten in the exercise I want and need, but things are crazy right now.
I hope to see another drop in weight tomorrow and am eating right today to make sure that happens. I'll eat low salt today to make up for the higher salt meals I've had lately. When I wake up, my ring doesn't fit, etc. so I feel the extra salt is not good for me or my blood pressure.
You all take care. I'm sending good vibes to all of us. Life really can be a roller coaster. It's great when we can ride it out and be proud of the outcome.

Judy
234/206/199soon (just because I feel I need to do something silly!)
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Old 01-22-2002, 03:08 PM   #3  
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Hi, Turtles,

Everyone--thanks for the support in this difficult time. It's especially wonderful to be able to share with my turtle buddies, since I feel so far from my other friends and family. You are the best!

Mousie, thanks for the letter suggestion. Since I live so close, writing never really occurred to me. Me--the writer--didn't think to write! Anyway, I'm going to email him. He'll be more likely to answer an email than snail mail.

Lauren, your report of the useless exercise video cracked me up so much I read it to my dh. He thought it was too funny!

I'm glad to hear that you're feeling better about how your eating is going. And that you're continuing with your workouts. Great job! Glad you're not letting a difficult week get you down. I expect that you will need to create a good plan for when you go back to work full time. It is easier to do this when you're at home all day, I've noticed.

I weighed myself again and I'm up, but there is no real reason for it. I've been walking, as usual. Eating lower in my range (bottom to middle), partly because I haven't been as hungry and partly to make up for the really high point day I had last weekend. So, I'm ignoring the number and just going on. If I show a gain I can't account for on Sunday, I'm going to add a couple of points back because eating a few points lower is the only real change I've made lately. I hate to do that, though, because I'm really not hungry enough to eat them.

This weekend will be a challenge, foodwise. We're taking Chris to San Francisco to meet with a counselor at the Acadamey of Art to find out if we can get enough financial aid to send him to college there. And we have another short meeting to drop off an art piece he wants to enter in a youth art show there. Then on Sunday, we're taking advantage of having a rental car and going to San Jose.

Two days of eating elsewhere is not easy because I don't do it very often. OTOH, because I don't do it very often, it doesn't have a huge effect on my long term weight loss. Anyway, unless we end up at a familiar restaurant that I can go to anytime, I'm not counting points in SF. We'll only be eating one meal, lunch, there. And so I'm going to enjoy one of the "foodie heavens" in this country. But in San Jose, we'll eat at a familiar restaurant and probably share something low-point.

I wish we could go to the art show, but it's at night on a work night. Paul could never get enough sleep if he had to drive back here from SF and then get up at 3:45 to go to work the next day. A club Chris helped start at school is going as a field trip, though. So he will get to see the show with some buddies.

This difficult time is teaching me what the word "acceptance" really means. Acceptance as in the part of the serenity prayer that says "accept the things I cannot change". I know that most people seem to equate it with resigning themselves to whatever the situation is. But resignation is a passive berb and acceptance is an active. When you resign yourself, you don't do anything.

But to accept something is like when someone gives you a gift, in order to accept that gift you have to reach out and take it. That's what acceptance is. Reaching out and taking my life. That's hard, but what it's teaching me is that when I reach out and take life, I can find the hidden blessing. In this case, the blessing of a little more time to just be with my brother, even if it's in cyberspace instead of in person.

Anyway, that's my insight from my journaling this morning. I'd bet it has application with our weight loss journey, but I didn't meditate on that aspect of it, yet. It wouldn't surprise me if I don't come back from my walk with some insight in that area. I often get insights re: my weight loss journey, my writing, and life in general while I'm walking. I think that's why I like walking better than most any other exercise. I can think and meditate and work out story ideas and plot lines and get some exercise at the same time.

Well, I've got to go. I finished my lunch and I need to go walk. The weather is being very cooperative, unlike yesterday.

Happy turtlin'!

Lin
272/233 (last reliable weighin) /225/135 or so
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Old 01-22-2002, 10:15 PM   #4  
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First day of the new semester, Turtles, and I survived! My Physics prof is interesting to listen to (his style and manner of speaking are engaging) but belabors his points--I found myself wanting to stand up and shriek "I GET IT already! Move on!" which I imagine wouldn't put me in his best graces. My "history and philosophy of sport" prof looks *exactly* like a younger version of my father's best friend. Very weird.

I saw several people I knew and made a couple of new acquaintances, so it's been one of the best first-days ever. This is my 13th school since elementary, so I feel like I'm in a position to say that!

I carried my foodbag with me today, and that's a good thing, because I got hungry right before my first lecture AND right in the middle of my second lecture! Of course, it doesn't help that I was up at 5:30 to beat the First-Day-Of-Classes-Parking-Mania, and thus ate breakfast at about 6. All in all, though, I was sane and normal. I felt very very guilty when I first got hungry, though. Dragged out my journal and wrote about it waiting for the prof to arrive. Finally decided that I felt as if I had no right to eat, as if it would make me conspicuous, to be eating something (fruit!) in the middle of a class full of 18 year olds poured into size 4 jeans. Once I realized that I decided I was being stupid, I was physically hungry and I had a right to eat to satisfy that hunger, no matter what size I am or what size they are. No one has a right to judge me for taking care of myself. So all in all a good thing. Being 26 and size...um...I don't actually know what size I am, I think maybe 18?...among size-4 18 year olds is awkward, though. I'm right at the age where I should still theoretically "belong", but not the size, and it's awkward. Add that to my accident history and the effects of that on my maturity level, and the fact that I'm married, and the fact that for physical reasons I can't really "party", and the fact that I scorn sororities, and it makes for an interesting mix.

Ah well, just first day musings. Hope everyone is doing well, and all power to you for a healthy tomorrow!
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Old 01-22-2002, 10:34 PM   #5  
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Lin, Mousie, and Lauren,]
All I want to say is that we are brave. We keep on facing life and all the obstacles it throws in our path.
Lin--I love the active vs the passive as accepting over resigning oneself analogy. Wow--lots of thought there. The serenity prayer has gotten me through lots of tough times. Let the comfort of those words wash over you and think of St. Francis and all he did for the world.

Mousie,
I'm so glad your first day of school was so good. And remember, it's perfectly okay to eat when you're hungry!

Lauren,
Take care of yourself

Out of the blue I ate too much today. I am beginning to realize that this will happen once in a while and I need to prepare for it.
I had gotten too tired and ate instead of napping or sleeping. I didn't analyze what I was feeling properly. I'm starting to get this really well. Amazing insights to myself are popping up all the time. Now I have to head these inappropriate eating cues off at the pass.

Good vibes to you all,
Judy
234/206/199soon
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Old 01-23-2002, 11:44 AM   #6  
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Hi, tortoise beings.

Judy, good for you "getting it" when you overeat instead of just beating yourself up. That's so cool! When I get tired, I'm prone to overeating too, to "give myself energy." Dumb-da-dumb-dumb. If I give myself a 20-minute walk instead or a 20-minute nap, I'm in much better shape.

Mousie, I hear you about not fitting in with all those tiny students. I sat in on some classes when I worked at U of Penn, and it was interesting to say the least. Talk about a fish out of water! Hope the semester goes well for you, and I'm glad you just ate when you felt like it and put all that peer pressure stuff aside.

Lin, I'll bet your weight gain is due to PMS more than anything. I hope you have a great time this weekend. I find that even on days when I decide to splurge, writing it down (even if I can't count it) makes it easier for me to stay on track. Just a thought.

About accepting one's life ... I agree, that can be tough. I have such admiration for a monastic priest I know who was imprisoned for years in Romania -- in solitary confinement, no less -- for his faith. His thoughts on accepting his life in prison and giving it to God are eye-opening. He is one of the holiest people I know.

I've had a couple good OP days now. I had a blecchy weigh-in at home (up a half pound) but a good one at WW again (down a pound). I can't figure that out; that's the second week in a row this has happened. You'd think in the evening with clothes on I would weigh a lot more, but now there's only about a 2-pound difference. Weird. I'm going to try weighing myself at home tomorrow to see if there's any change.

Had fun clothes shopping yesterday, too. The plus sizes are finally too big! Wheee! I'm finding my measurements continue to go down, even though my pounds really haven't moved all that much. Thank you, exercise.

Oh, and BOY, do I have clean teeth now. Unfortunately I have to go back for two more appointments to get all the fillings done. On the bright side, I have finally learned my lesson -- FLOSS, FLOSS, FLOSS.

Onward and downward,

Lauren
274/297/189 by April 17
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Old 01-23-2002, 04:47 PM   #7  
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Hey, Turtles,

Wow! I envy you, Mousie. I still wish I could go back to school. I think if I had the money and transportation, I would take classes just for the fun of learning as long as I could. Glad your first day went well.

I doubt that all of your classmates are 18 and size 4. Look again! I bet you find a variety of student ages and sizes. I'll grant you that a larger proportion of the student population is young and thin than the general population. But there is nothing for you to be embarassed about. Including eating when you need to. Watch them. You'll see that they eat all the time and what they're eating is usually not as healthy as what you're eating. Be proud of yourself. You're doing exactly what you need to do. I'll bet most of those young, skinny things haven't a clue how to do that!

BTW--you can belong at any age, if you just make the first move to talk to them. I made a bunch of great classroom friendships while I was at Foothill. Many of them were with people young enough to be my kids.

Judy, being overly tired is one of the times when I overeat and sometimes don't realize why until it's too late. It's one of the toughest things to fix because when you're tired, your brain isn't functioning as well. So you don't realize what the problem is until after you've eaten and don't feel better.

I try to keep that thought in the back of my brain. To ask myself if I'm tired when I want to eat and I'm not hungry or stressed or bored or whatever. I go down the list. If tired is a possibliity, I try to take a nap before I eat something.

It's so cool to hear you talking about amazing insights. And to see you conquering some of the issues that have been causing you problems.

We all have been having those insights a lot lately. It's great because we are all becoming more successful in figuring out what to do, and the pounds are coming off, albeit at turtle pace.

Lauren, I do that, too. Write down what I eat, even if I don't count the points. It helps me to make sure I don't stuff myself. I hate that stuffed feeling, but my mind seems to connect "no counting and no writing" with "don't worry about how hungry you are." It's something I'm working on changing. It's getting better, but I don't have very many opportunities to practice since I mostly eat at home these day.

Maybe your scale needs to be calibrated or needs a new battery or you need a new scale! Go with the WW weight and enjoy! BTW--your typo is hilarious. When you fix it, you'll be down 100 pounds in a day!

Great to hear that you're out of the plus sizes. Someday we all will be there. Except Mousie, who will be a smaller regular size. It's also good to hear about your great results with your measurements. Great going!

I love your story about the Romanian priest. You've had some intersting experiences in your life and known some interesting people. You have lots of stuff to turn into stories.

I'm still OP. Walking almost every day. I'd like to increase my exercise level, but I really need to lose a little more weight before I do. I can't walk faster than a certain pace right now or my knees, lower back and the tendons (or muscles or whatever is in that spot) that go from my foot to my shin really ache. That's due to an ancient injury from high school, no less. But it flares up less when I weigh less. OTOH, my clothes fit like I'm losing at least some inches, if not pounds. So, I guess I'm doing a good amount of moving for me right now.

Have a great day!

Happy turtlin'!

Lin
272/233/225/135 or so
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Old 01-23-2002, 08:18 PM   #8  
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Heh, Lin -- you're right about the funny typo. Look, Ma -- I gained and lost 100 pounds in a day!

About the scales ... I forgot to mention. I'm finally below 200 even at WW in the evening with clothes on! Woo-hoo!

I hear you about not being able to increase exercise level until you lose weight. I'm having to get creative about that. I'm making much BIGGER movements when I do my videos, and I'm occasionally adding in additional movements.

Here are a couple of things I'm finding really motivating right now that I forgot to mention:

-- People are REALLY noticing my weight loss now and commenting on it. I'm getting the "Hey, skinny, how much weight have you lost anyway???" and "If you turn sideways, you'll disappear" comments, which is hilarious given my weight, but it's fun. After 3.5 years of chipping away at this, it's nice to hear.

-- I can wear regular shoes to church now!! That probably sounds funny, but you have to realize two things: One, we stand through almost our entire church service. (That's traditional in Orthodox churches.) Two, because of my crappy feet combined with my weight, I've had to wear sneakers to church for years. The past few weeks I've tried wearing other shoes, and -- NO PAIN! Wheeeee! I'm especially happy about this because I LOVE shoes and have really missed being able to wear different kinds. I've worn sneakers everywhere, even to work with skirts, for so long; it feels GREAT to finally be able to wear my other shoes again. This past Sunday I wore my tan Birkenstock boots, and it was so much fun. (Because DH is a podiatrist, he gets Birkenstock shoes at half price. They're all he wears to work these days.)

Onward and downward,

Lauren
274/197 (not 297!!)/189 by April 17
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Old 01-24-2002, 07:17 PM   #9  
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Hi, Turtles,

Lauren, that's so cool about people commenting positively about your weight loss. And the shoe thing. My hope is that once I lose a significant amount of weight, I might get lucky enough to be back to a medium width. Of course, with my luck, medium nowadays will turn out to be smaller than when I was younger. And congrats especially on the scales! I used to go to an evening meeting. People did the weirdest things to try to get the lowest number. And they did more weird things than the people at my morning meetings over the years. I figured that if was consistent with following the program and wearing similar clothing, the scale number would be consistent, too.

I'm doing great re: WW right now. Over Christmas I bought some
Godiva chocolates as a gift for my family. I really wanted truffles, but they were out of them. (A department store, not the Godiva store.) Well, they got some, so I bought a tiny box for Paul and me to share. They included the nutrition info and I found out that one Godiva truffle is a mere 3 points. I ate two, but I had the banked points to cover. Then, I wasn't all that hungry today, so I didn't even use the banked points. Just stayed at the top of my range.

I've been doing my walking and journaling. I don't even mention the water because I've been doing that for at least ten years. So, that's going fine. Everything else is about the same and I'm OK.

Hope all of you have a great day.

Happy turtlin'!

Lin
272/233/225/135 or so
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Old 01-24-2002, 08:08 PM   #10  
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Lauren,
Congrats on getting nice compliments about your weight. This is when it really starts to feel wonderful. You've got your goal in sight. Also--I love SAS sandals and shoes. They have wonderful padding in the sole. Even though the floors I work and walk on all day are cement, the SAS shoes protect my feet. Thought I'd give them a plug.

Lin,
Good for you for working the program the way you want to.
You're really on a roll. Also, isn't it neat to really find out how many points something you want is (i.e. Godiva truffles) and count it in rather than worrying about it and assuming you're "off your diet?" That's what WW offers to me right now.

Everyone:
Dh and I caught a movie after work today. It was great and it feels good to do something other than work and sleep. We saw Gosman's (something or other)--very British and set in about the 1920's. I liked it a lot. Then we headed for a diner for dinner and I had an eggwhite omelet with mushrooms and a slice of whole wheat toast without butter and as a side I had mashed potatoes.
I just needed some comfort food and the potatoes did the trick.
I'll be weighing in on Saturday. I believe the WI helps me stay OP. Otherwise, I think I might just accept the weight I have, do well most of the time and binge just enough to maintain this weight. That's not what I want to do. I think I'll weigh myself tomorrow morning to see how I'm doing this week. (Okay, okay, I can hear you all yelling.)
Take care of yourselves and keep on rolling!

Judy
234/206/199soon
ps
I'm so sorry to hear about Suzanne. This must be a very tough time for her and I'm sending her good vibes, too.
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Old 01-25-2002, 01:48 PM   #11  
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Hi, Turtles,

Judy, we won't yell at you. But I wonder about your choice of language. When you said that you want to "do well most of the time and 'binge' enough to stay at this weight", it made me wonder if the issue you're struggling with is feeling deprived, then overeating whatever you feel deprived of.

Perhaps you need to take a look at your journal and see if you tend to make food choices based on what you think will help you lose weight, rather than on what you want to eat. You can learn to stay OP and still eat the foods that you really like. It takes a little more effort than "doing the diet thing". But it's worth it because eating the foods you like (such as your mashed potatoes) can really help you to hang in there.

Also, be sure you're getting enough fat and points. Especially if you've started to exercise. Exercise often requires a change in our eating habits because our bodies fuel requirement changes.

I've noticed that I've been changing my ideas about what constitutes a meal, since I've started to do mini meals. I think part of tweaking WW so it works into our lifestyles is to rethink our preconceptions about food. A lot of traditional meal combinations are difficult to eat when I'm averaging 5-7 points per meal. So, I pick the item I really, really want and adjust the rest of the meal around it.

For example, if I were making the choices from your last night's meal and really wanted the comfort of mashed potatoes, I would have had the mashed potatoes with either a poached egg or mixed a point or two of grated cheese into the potato (Most restaurants will give you some cheese on the side if you ask for it.) If I wanted more bulk, I would have had a salad with lemon juice, salsa, or dressing on the side, depending on how many points I wanted to spend.

I won't choose egg white omelettes or dry toast for two reasons. One is that in my head, they're diet food. Those are on the list of foods I used to choose because I was on a diet, but I don't like either of those foods in that form. I only eat eggs if I have the points for the yolks, too. And I eat toast only if I can put something on it.

As for the toast in this meal, the only reason I can see that I might have ordered it is that it's traditional to have toast with eggs, so I'd order it out of habit. I'm learning not to do that anymore. I'm learning to make choices based on what I want, whether I have the points available, my nutritional needs, and not to eat refined carbs without protein. (The latter is a personal thing. I feel ill if I munch on a candy bar or something similar without eating some protein, too. So I usually eat them with a regular meal, rather than as a snack, as many people do.)

The other thing I noticed in your post is that you really worry about the scale numbers. But the scale is probably the worst indication of how much fat you've lost, especially if you've started exercising. So, I'd give it more time. And remember everyone has plateaus, no matter what they do.

Consider the possibility that you might need to take a break for a month or so to consider the program and how to best fit it into your life. Or to deal with some issues that have popped up. Or just to take a break. Sometimes after a break, our bodies will lose weight a little more steadily. I don't know why that happens, but I've experienced that in my life. I read an article once that recommended losing in increments. (Losing a certain amount of weight, then maintaining for a few months, then losing another set amount of weight.) Most people don't have the patience to do that, even if it might be healthier, as the article suggested

But, even if you decide to maintain your weight for a time, or forever, keep coming to the Turtle Club. We support you in whatever decision you make because it's your life and your journey. You have to do what's right for you. My experience was that continuing to come here is the main reason I didn't regain all of the wieght I lost prior to my decision to take a break and maintain my weight.

My day today is going pretty well. I'm going for a walk in a little while. My dh is picking up the rental car tonight for our trip to SF. I'm looking forward to it, except that the weatherman is predicting rain, just for the weekend. Then we go back to the dry, clear days we've had for the past two or three weeks. Frustrating! But it's going to be so wonderful to spend a day with my son. I hope we will learn that their financial aid package will allow him to go to art school. And I'm looking forward to seeing the art piece he's entering in the youth art show.

I'm OP. And feeling good about how that's going. I need to remember to take some water with me this weekend. Getting in the water is the hardest thing when I'm not at home. And I'll take my index card to keep track of what I eat when I'm not home so I can write it in my journal when I get back.

I'm not sure if I will be able to post this weekend. I'll try when I get back in the evenings. It will be such a busy weekend, since we're going to San Jose on Sunday, too. I'm really appreciating my dh being willing to do all that driving, with the extra trip to San Jose, so I can see my family for a little while.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Happy turtlin'!

Lin
272/233/225/135 or so

Last edited by Lin S; 01-25-2002 at 02:01 PM.
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Old 01-25-2002, 10:17 PM   #12  
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Lin,
I really have to learn to express myself more clearly. More than anything else in the world, I want to stay OP and lose weight.
I do not want to eat moderately and then binge to keep maintaining the weight I have right now. I have lost 25 pounds since I began WW and I'm happy to have those pounds off. Now I am working very hard to get more pounds off. Luckily, I never choose foods that I don't like. I am at a mindset right now that if I eat in the lower range of points, I'll lose a little better, especially if in that same week I use some banked points once or twice--a modifie Wendie's Plan. I haven't implemented exercising yet, but I work a long, hard day with little kids and I'm pretty beat at the end of the day. I am thinking of doing more moderate exercise and actually doing it--maybe a Tai Chi video that I have or something else that would at least help me become more flexible.

I have long ago given up on eating food specifically to lose weight if I don't like it. But I do eat low point foods that I enjoy because they help me to shake up my weight.
I am very proud of my accomplishments since Halloween. I don't know exactly how much I've lost, but I know that it is nearing the end of January, I'm through the holidays, and I'm going in the right direction.
As always, thanks for all your input. I'm going back to read the rest of your post now. Everybody have a great weekend.
I went to WW tonight instead of waiting until tomorrow morning.
I am officially down .2#--which is going in the right direction.

Lauren,
So glad the WW scale is going down for you. I think it's fabulous that you're down below 199# at night with clothes on! This calls for a celebration.

Judy
234/206/199soon
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Old 01-26-2002, 01:55 PM   #13  
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Judy, I think you're doing great, too. And congratulations on another week going in the right direction! I can tell from your posts that you've really made a shift in your thinking -- it's wonderful to see. Good for you. Thanks for the SAS shoes tip, too. I have the opposite problem as Lin -- my feet are the one part of me I'd like to stay fat! They're very narrow when I lose weight (AA or AAA). My mother wears an 11 AAAA, if that tells you anything. We used to joke that we could pull her behind a boat without any skis.

I wonder if part of Lin's confusion stemmed from seeing you eating food that she considers diet food and not appetizing. It's hard sometimes not to assume people would behave just like we would given similar circumstances. I suspect it's especially hard for Lin, because of her extremely sensitive sense of taste. (Sorry to talk about you as though you're not here, Lin ). I suspect that I would find it easier to make certain substitutions than Lin would, and so your post didn't strike me as "Judy's reverting to diet food, and that'll never work."

Me, I love egg beaters (and generic versions). I actually prefer them to eggs most of the time, and I'm thrilled that they're such a good source of protein for so few points.

And I hear you about weighing in helping to keep you focused. It does me, too. Yes, I know we shouldn't have an unhealthy fixation on the scale's numbers. That's something to watch out for. But for me it keeps getting back to finding that balance between falling back into diet mentality vs. inertia. I'm very good at both extremes. What I'm looking for is the middle ground, the one where I do make substitutions (even eating "diet food" that I like, even if I prefer the "non-diet" version) but don't deprive myself to an extent I can't live long term with. The middle ground where I do pay attention to what my weight is doing, using the scale as a barometer because I'm notoriously good at lying to myself otherwise, but don't get so fixated on the numbers that I lose sight of the other very real successes I'm experiencing and so get disheartened and give up. The middle ground where I do make weight-related goals to prod myself forward, but don't invest so much of myself into them that my old perfectionism kicks in and I feel that I've failed if I've only lost 10 pounds instead of 15.

It's hard. It's a balancing act, one that involves falling off the beam maybe as often as I stay on it. But I'm hopeful.

Saving points today for Thai tonight. I think Thai is my favorite cuisine -- especially the coconut curries. A true caloric catastrophe, but one I'm willing to work around rather than give up. I estimate my favorite green curry chicken dinner at a local restaurant to be about 22 points. I eat half and save the other half for another day.

Went to the symphony last night. Some friends have season tickets they couldn't use. It was lovely -- I so love to hear live music. And it was fun people-watching -- I haven't seen that many fur coats in a long time. The conductor was a blast to watch. He was shaped just like a conductor should be -- like an egg on tapered stilts. And he walked like a penguin.

Have a wonderful day, everyone. A winter day in Michigan that actually has sunshine is an event to celebrate.

Onward and downward,

Lauren
274/197.5/189 by April 17
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Old 01-26-2002, 05:47 PM   #14  
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Lauren,
Glad you got to hear the symphony. How marvelous. I'm also checking out your posted weight. You must feel terrific at how nicely your weight is coming off. Also kissing X size clothes goodby is a joyous thing.
I appreciate big time your response to Lauren and my approaches to losing this weight and keeping it off forever. You really understand what I am doing and I'm glad for your explanation. Right now I am hoping to get into the swing of averaging a pound loss a week. That would serve me very well.
And hooray for you for making room in your week to have wonderful Thai food. That's one of the best parts of WW--the flexibility to plan and prepare and have favorite treats once in a while.
I'm a long way away from the young married woman who used to feel I hadn't done badly when I'd eat two and a half NY bagels with cream cheese! Lots of WW's value is actually learning how caloric some foods are. And then I like to make substitutes to get something close in taste, but far away from calories and fat totals,
to keep my weight loss going. I'm glad for all the info. that WW provides.

LIn,
I hope you're having a wonderful weekend with your boys and getting back to SJ, etc. You'll certainly be busy this weekend. Have a great time. And good vibes for your brother and your family at this tough time.

Mousie,
How are you doing? So many of the things you expressed over the holidays and recently have made me feel I know you even more. Thanks for sharing. I feel we're helping you by giving you support too.

Everyone,
After talking with my daughter this morning I headed back to WW to pick up their 123Success Slow Cooking book. It's one I had wanted to pick up, then decided against it. As it turns out, my dd wants to eat better and just bought herself a crockpot. So, we'll have fun going over the recipes and deciding which ones to use.

That may have to wait a bit because I've picked up a little upset stomach and if I'm contagious, I don't want to be around her and her dh. So--when they come over tonight, I think I'll make myself scarce.

Everybody keep on turtlin' and doing this program the way it works for you! My new goal is: 199 by March 15th. I know I can do that!

Judy
234/206/199soon
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Old 01-26-2002, 09:12 PM   #15  
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Judy, I'm still here! And WOW do I have a story to tell!

I went into student health yesterday to see if they could help me, my Pill prescription had run out without me noticing (oops) and my HMO can't get me into an Ob/Gyn for 2 weeks. So I go in begging, tail between my legs. I had planned on just not looking when they weighed me, right? Well THAT didn't work. The nurse was sitting at her desk and talking to me, and being very fretful over the fact that I've been having migraines lately and this means I can't have the PIll anymore (huh?). Then she notices that she's missed weighing me, points out the door and says "go hop on the scale and come back". Well, um, what do I do now? So I said "shoes and everything?" and she nodded. Well, ummmmmmm...so, I did it.

THAT STUPID SCALE WEIGHED ME 20 POUNDS MORE THAN WHEN I WEIGHED MYSELF ON DECEMBER 1! I was almost sick--I am still wearing the same clothes that fit the same way!--and knocked about 5 pounds off the amount I told her. She made me make an appointment for monday to see a doctor about the migraines, did NOT give me the Pill (I only need 1 month, til my regular appointment) and sent me on my way.

I was mentally reeling the whole drive home. Ouch, ouch, ouch. When I got home I stripped, emptied my bladder, and got on the scale I have not stepped on in 2 months. According to that* scale, I'm up 10 pounds. Alright, that's it. I promptly went grocery shopping. Bought salad stuff (I make a lovely salad), Smart Ones, personal pizzas, cereal, and some bits and pieces that I needed for the house.

This morning, I rejoined WW. New meeting, new center, new people, new leader that so far I like. I bought a 5-week prepay package, and made friends with the girl/young woman/person wearing an SDSU sweatshirt sitting next to me. We promised each other that we'd be there next week. Otherwise, have not told DH and have not told anyone else (except you guys) that I've gone back. This is MY thing.

One thing I realized is that I needed time away from focusing on dieting/points/whatever to figure out my head, yes, but I'm better now. I've done that, and life is getting a LOT better every day, and I feel like I can start to deal with the weight issue again. I do NOT agree that I can eat anything I want and just eat until I'm full. My first argument with that theory is that, for me, it takes way too much time. Sad but true. If I was at home all day doing nothing, maybe, but I have other things to do in my life. Second argument is that some foods are just inherently *healthier* than others. There ARE some better food choices. Now, I was trying to make the "bad" food choices because I was "supposed" to, but I actually really do like healthy foods (I was complaining to my husband that it's hard for us to use coupons, because they don't ever print them for healthy stuff! Only for processed stuff). I made myself some rules--no hopping on and off the scale, ONLY once a week right before a meeting, must still use the food/writing journal (like that's such a hardship) so I can continue to work on the emotional side of things, and no obsessing. Obsessing starts, WW stops, end of story.

So, Turtles! I'm in again! I'm excited and optimistic about this. I no longer feel like I'm butting my head against an invisible brick wall. I'm willing to do what it takes to be thin again. Here's to us, Turtles, and full speed ahead!




PS--oh, one reason also my weight is up right now--TOM is imminent. Timing is everything!
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