[Citcat]

Hi Everyone!

I have never posted a message before. I have always preferred to keep my weight loss battle private mostly because I have felt a lot of shame surrounding being severely obese most of my life. A little history, 20 years ago I lost 97 pounds on a very strict unhealthy diet. Unfortunately, I gained it all back in a very short period of time. Ten years later I lost 101 pounds on WW, got pregnant, and slowly gained all my weight back again.

Sometimes the battle seems hopeless. I have around 180 pounds to lose which feels like it will take forever, but I must do it. Life is passing me by and I am starting to feel the repercussions healthwise, of having been this size all my life. It also affects my beautiful daughter because I'm not physically able to do as much with her as she deserves. This MUST change.

So I will work at overcoming my shame, and pray I get the support I need to be successful. If there is a group of people out there who could possibly understand what I am going through it would be you, so I welcome all who choose to respond to me, especially those who have found the courage and inspiration to try again.

[Dora140]

Howdy all,
You sure picked the right place to post. We're all friendlies here.

The first thing I suggest you do is change your outlook to one of determination, rather than guilt and shame. Those negative feelings can really crumble away at our foundations.
Good for you to get back on the journey. How many of us have lost and regained? I see lots of raised hands, mine included.

I found this site thru a friend in Feb. 2000 and it has been a lifesaver. Your best bet is to find a few threads that appeal to you and post, post, post!

You CAN do this. You ARE worth it!!
All the best!

[2ofMe]

Citcat: So good to have you here. I am one who has tried again . . . and again . . . and again. I need to make myself understand that there is no "when I'm done" there is only "for the rest of my life" to this change in lifestyle.

You really HAVE come to the right place.

2oM (Annie)

[Citcat]

Hi Everyone!

Dora140, I have taken your advise and looked through some of the threads. You guys are amazing. Seeing how you are working so hard to improve your health and lifestyle is really encouraging. And you are right, I Am worth it, and I CAN do it.

2ofMe, Thanks for your input. I too realize that this has to be not a diet, but a lifestyle change that must be with me the rest of my life. I have to work hard at changing my attitude from deprivation too liberation. Hard to do but I'm working on it.

Thanks for your support.

[Stargazer]

Hi everyone. I could really use some support too. I am 31 years old and a mother of 2 boys. I am at my heaviest weight (except in my last pregnancy) and I just can't seem to stick to my diet. I have the WW123 at home books and every week I say I'm going to try again but I last a day or two. I was thinking if I had some friends to talk to it might help.

Mind if I joined your group?

Thanks,
Nancy

[Citcat]

Hi Stargazer:

Glad to see you here. It really is difficult to stay motivated on your own. I think we could all probably attest to that. I have often started, failed, started, failed only to plan to try again, but I have determined that I am going to do it and every success no matter how small is a step in the right direction.

When I was younger, all that mattered was that I lose weight as quickly as possible. It didn't matter that the diet was unhealthy or impossible to live with for the rest of my life. Now I know better. I'm going to just take it one day at a time, be proud of the days I live healthfuly and forgive myself for the days I struggle.

Talk to you soon.
Citcat

[2ofMe]

Hi Stargazer: Welcome! I think most of us here know all too well about having off days and on days. Come here to celebrate the on days and come here to get support during the off days. Be sure that you give yourself a pat on the back when you have a couple of good days. Dwell on the good ones instead of the bad ones.

Good luck. Look forward to "hearing" what you two gals have to say.

2oM (Annie)

[Gardener]

Welcome, you will find so much wonderful support here and it will make your journey so much easier. We're all in this together!

[canadian]

Hi Citcat


Well, I thought I was losing my mind as I read your first post. You were reciting MY LIFE.... boy can I relate....
Mine goes like this, life long battle and I remember my first devistating blow at about 12 years old like it was yesterday, walking home from school feeling pretty good, 2 young good looking guys start whistling and I'm smiling inside thinking they are looking my way, then here it comes. 36-24-36 and SO IS THE OTHER LEG....

Well, needless to say I was crushed. That was the first real time I started watching what I was eating and lost about 40 pounds, and gained it back, than lost and gained for the next 30 years.

I also did the 490 calorie per day crazy diet and took off 114 pounds in 5 months, felt good but started loosing my hair and quit. Slowly gaining all the weight back and then some. I've done WW more times than I can think and have alway had sucess but only lasted 4 months max. Even had a balloon on a small tubing jammed down my nose into my stomach and inflated with liquid to give me that full sensation...

Well enough of that depressing story.....

TODAY

I joined ww becuase my 15 year old daughter wanted to and being a mom, of course I tried again.... well when I got on the scale and it registered 430 pounds I nearly died. (which I was slowly doing)
Well that was on September 12, 2000. I'm happy to say that 92 of the 260 pounds I need to lose is gone forever..... I feel so much better, I'm looking good and best of all it's the additude thing that I am most surprised about.

I will tell you as everyone else has that YOU CAN DO THIS, and you have come to the right place for support. I found this site last Novemeber or so, and it has been a great help and to be able to write about some of the things that bother me is the best therapy.

I can't tell you why its so different this time for me but I know that sometime in 2002 I will reach my goal but that isn't as important to me as knowing that I can eat this way and stay healthy forever.

I know I've rambled (AGAIN) I'm sure anyone that knows me is smiling, but I hope this helps you to not look at the big picture and have faith in yourself so that you can make your life the best it can be FOR YOU.

Have a great OP day!

Brenda
430/338/170 in 2002

[Chillin]

{{{{{Citcat}}}}} - put that shame and guilt away. We all have things that are hard to do and bad habits. Unfortunately ours are there for the world to see. You are a human being and a worthwhile creature - stand up and be proud.

It does seem a long way to go. One thing I would recommend is to go to the 100+ group on the WW message boards. There is a wonderful lady there named Vida (posts under the name lapita) who has lost 190 lbs. to date. You may want to get some insight from her on the details of her struggle, but she's a very upbeat lady. You can learn that you CAN lose that amount of weight, people before you have done it and you can as well.

I wish you the best of luck, and keep on posting.

[Citcat]

Hi Everybody

Hope your all having an OP day. I'm doing better today after trying to get over a severe chest infection. I think the antibiotics are finally kicking in. Yesterday I didn't have the energy to stick to the plan, just huddled under a blanket and felt miserable. Well today is a new day and I'm back on track.

Canadian: So glad to hear from you. I'm sure if we starting taking a poll of the members we could write a book on all the crazy unsafe diets we have all tried and failed at. In fact it absolutely horrifies me when a friend mentions they are going to try some extreme method or other to lose weight. I feel like shaking them,... begging them, ...DO NOT DO IT! There is probably alot of truth to the saying "we have dieted ourselves up to this weight."
Don't get me wrong, I beleive there is a place for dieting or I wouldn't be on WW but I perfer to think of it as a lifestyle change. Although it is difficult to stick to at times, it's not because of the diet, but rather, our own thoughts and beleifs about ourselves. That for me is the hardest part to change, but I am absolutely going to do it.
WOW! over 90 pounds and still going strong. You have my admiration and I have no doubt you can and will make it. Children can be such great motivators can't they? YOU GO GIRL

WW Queen: Thanks for the hug. I needed that. I am going to check out that site you recommended. Vida sounds like a wonderful lady and I'm sure I can learn a lot from her experience.

Have a great day everyone.

[Stargazer]

Hi everyone. Thanks for the welcome messages the other day. I'm sorry I haven't posted but I was out all day yesterday. I'm starting my WW123 on Monday. I know it's a few days away but between left over easter candy and 2 birthdays it'll be easier to start fresh on Monday. Right now I'm at 286 - my first goal is to weigh 250 again.
I really need to do this - not just for me but for my 2 little boys - Stephen will be 3 in June and Alex is 6 months old.
Thanks for listening.

Nancy