Hi Everyone

Last week I lost 5.6 pounds and this morning my scale is up 4, I know it's water retention but I'm a little frustrated.

I took my National Registry Exam (EMT License) Thursday morning and within 3 hours my results were posted. When I read the words 'Your attempt was unsuccessful' I stared at the screen in disbelief then after the shock wore off, I began sobbing uncontrollably. This went on for hours THEN I broke down and turned to food for comfort grabbing a bag of Ruffles fat free potato chips (14PTS for the entire bag) but I didn't eat the entire bag. I literally cried and ate for 2 days, now my scale isn't too happy with me and I feel like eating again.

I've wondered often where my place in the world would be and I've dreamed of having a career in the medical field (Paramedic) but failing this exam has only made achieving my dream harder. A few people told me that maybe I'm meant to help people with weight issues and that I should work for Weight Watchers. Right now something is telling me that's where I should be even though I want to help sick people.

Sorry, I know this is a bit long and should go in a blog.

Don't be swayed from your dreams/goal! When can you retake the test? Take that sucker again! And again, if necessary!! Remember it took JFK, Jr. three tries to pass the NY bar exam (yes, I'm dating myself, but I remember thinking, dang, he's having to face the media every single time he fails and he just says he'll give it another go).

Don't worry about what you ate - you're starting fresh right now. Not tomorrow morning, right now. Doesn't sound like you went too wacky, anyway, food-wise!

You can achieve your dream and STILL work with WW if you want to, on the side. You can do it!!

oh i'm sorry(( i know how disappointed you must be. but can't you take the test again? after a certain time period? lots of people have to retake tests or even just choose to for a higher score. no shame. and you'll have the advantage of experience the next time around too! just get back on your food plan. new day, new allowance.

Kim, I am sorry you had such a bad week, but think of how much you have achieved! You've almost lost 100lbs in a year, you've no doubt inspired tons of people on this board (myself included), and with the story being published in your local paper you've inspired many more. You've gone from secretly eating hundreds of points of Burger King, McDonalds, and Taco Bell in your car to experiencing a major disappointment and only turning to a 14-point bag of FAT FREE Ruffles and not even eating the whole thing. Percentage wise, that's about 90% better than you were before. I'd say that's something to be very, very proud of.

It might have been disappointing and upsetting to not do as well as you would have liked on your exam this first time, but tomorrow is another day. Past failure does not dictate future success.

I don't even know what the right career for me is, so I won't attempt to pontificate on where yours should go, but keep trying for your dreams. You never know where you will end up.

It's tough to accept results that don't coincide with our vision of our future. You are at a crossroad now. What will you do? Throw in the towel? Eat yourself back to where you were? Or....will you be more determined than EVER to follow your dreams? To lead a healthy life and to help others? From what I've seen about you on this board, you will choose the latter. You're a fighter, after all. If you can't take the test again for some reason, maybe you can think of another way to help others. I don't know. Life is full of lumps and bumps.....believe in yourself and look at all that you have accomplished! You are a bright, caring, beautiful person who has so much to offer. You deserve to treat yourself right and put good nourishing foods in your body. I know you will choose the healthy path....you will help so many, just don't ever give up!

BIG I agree with luckymommy - it's time to decide where to go. It's a very hard decision and I wish you lots of luck with it. But at the end of the day, you ARE a fighter and you can outlast this!

Kim, don't give up your dreams. When can you retake the test?

I can definately take the test again, it costs $70 for each try. I really thought I was going to pass because I studied so hard 2 days leading up to the exam and both days I stayed up all night while managing to take a 30 minute nap during the day. I really think the stress and overthinking is why I failed, I would also re-read each question 5 times or more and doubt the answer I selected so I'd go back and choose another. The only thing I can do now is study and reschedule to take it again in 2 weeks.

I have been off track with my eating most of the week and last night I had one of the worst binges. My scale is up, it's water but still seeing the number I did today really made me angry because I am the one to blame.

I would LOVE to work for Weight Watchers and a couple months ago spoke to my leader about it. She said when I get to goal she would talk to me more about it Since my story was published in the newspaper my Facebook Page has been overwhelmed with friend requests and messages from people telling me how my story inspired them! It really is an honor to know people look to me for inspiration, I've never felt I could be anything to anyone so this is nice!

Thankyou The entire week was terrible for me, I was either stressed, crying or eating! I NEVER want to go back to the last few days, I need to keep moving forward. I actually felt myself slipping back to my old ways and knew if I didn't snap out of it, I'd be in huge trouble. The thing that scares me most IS going back and not being able to have enough will power to get back on track.

I can definately re-take the exam again and am going to do so in 2 weeks and from what I've heard a lot of people fail their first and second time. 2 fellow students took the exam first and both passed on the first try, I was the 3rd to take it and when I failed I felt like I wasn't smart enough. I found out 3 people who took it after me failed and I felt a little better, not because they failed but because they had also said the exam was really difficult. I think my issue is perfection, I need to stop trying to be perfect. I felt if I could get an awesome grade in class and score the highest grade on my final in the class (97%) that I could pass this exam. I set myself up for failure.

Last night I had a horrible binge, one of the worst since I began Weight Watchers. I woke up and realized today is a new day, time to get back on track, get to the gym and push through this because life is going to go on whether I like it or not.

I'm glad you posted this because you're right, if the only thing I ate was a bag of Fat Free Ruffles, then I really have come a long way from over a year ago. If this would have happened before Weight Watchers, I would have been in my car racing up to Burger King grabbing Double Whoppers. I couldn't even get through the entire bag of chips, the salt really got to me! It's funny how taste buds change after a while of eating really healthy, chips are not a high priority for me like they used to me. Today is a new day to start over and forget about the garbage I ate and the sadness I felt last week.

I would LOVE to work for Weight Watchers and I know that option is there for me. I spoke to my leader about this a couple months ago and she said when I get to goal, she would speak to me about it I'm going to re-take my exam in two week and pray that I pass. if I don't I'm going to accept it and try again.

I can re-take the exam in two weeks and if I fail 2 more times I will have to take a 24 hour refresher course. I'm definately not going to give up, I think I'm more frustrated than anything because I've worked my butt off for this.

During class last semester I was trying to take care of three kiddos which all have their own schedules, still try to lose weight and study at the same time! It was such a hard time for me but I got through and passed the course with almost an A. I don't want all that hard work I did to be in vain so I'm going to re-take the exam until I pass. I just don't want to get to a point where that becomes more important than maintaining my healthy eating habits.

Thankyou