Good morning ladies.
Welcome back Paige, happy anniversary. It is great you had a wonderful weekend. Did the girls enjoy it?
Hello Erica. One of your posts you mentioned my legs should be getting muscular I think. Well my calves look really good but my thighs are still jiggly, I don't know what you do for that. I hope you have a great day on plan and enjoy your meeting. You are making a difference it people's lives...yeah you.
Hi Emma, now you have us wanting those lasangne toppers....I hope you have a nice day and the weather is good to you. Enjoy your day.
Hi Kim, have a wonderful week.
Welcome Patty, I hope you stay in post with us. There is so much to learn here and I am sure you have things for us to learn. Have a great day.
Hi Tracy, have a great day and enjoy the nice weather.
Hi Tech,,,,have a wonderful day.
Hi Linda, you asked what I face this week, it is poor planning that gets me any time. As long as I plan I am good to go.
Hi L.J. I hope your week isn't too busy, good luck with Core.
Hi Laura, I miss your posts I hope you are well.
Hi Ginny, where are you, I miss you too.
Hi Future pixie, I hope you are out enjoying life.
Hello HAYLO Go Spurs Go, Go Haylo Go, get out there stepping chickie...I walked 13,179 steps....the challenge is on. See how far we can step today.
Have a great day.
Hello to anyone I forgot, Have a wonderful day.
Take Care
Ann

Thanks, Ann. By the way, if you click on "go advanced" when you make a response (see below where you type in a message?) you get a group of little things on the right called "smiles", you can click on where it says "more" below the little smiley things and you will have a window open up with TONS of these little "guys". Just type along, like I am and then click on the one that seems to fit how you feel. For me, it's this little guy: :(
I do think you are right, Ann, about some of what I am feeling. You are probably right that it is not all about weight watchers. It's about a great deal of things that contribute to the whole picture. One the the great and positive things I have in my life is all of you, though, and I am glad about that.
The success and positive reinforcement I thought would have happened by now has not come, sadly. I really felt that by a year from when I joined that I would be at goal, or nearer to goal. Instead I am hovering. There are times when I just don't think I could possibly put any more effort into all of this and sustain my "normal" life and there are other times that I beat myself up about not putting my "all" into it. I must keep trying, but again I'm tired of it, sick of it.
It truly would be nice to have someone be my WW "buddy". Though, I have my own daughter right here in the house who technically is that buddy, but she has her own life and is at the 16 year old age when she should be with her friends. I'm very proud of her, by the way. Watching her succeed has been wonderful. She is up to 22 pounds off, but here I sit losing and gaining the same one or two pounds over and over and over. I really am feeling defeated.
Is this the time that some members "throw in the towel" and give up? Then, they "allow" themselves to gain it all back, only to return 6 months or a year later and vow to "do it this time". I don't want to go back there, but this is just SO discouraging. This is a very good "test", maybe, for someone like Erica, who may have a member exactly like me. Is there that special something that could inspire me, get me on track losing and continuing that loss? There are members who have fallen off the wagon, have some gains and then stop coming. They are out there and they are discouraged. They have probably felt exactly as I am feeling today. If you skip one week, if you use that no weight in pass a few times and sit there listening at meetings, but then go off program during the week, you are starting a large downward trend. The positive self talking part of you becomes a negative self talking thing and you talk yourself right out of continuing upon the journey you set out on.
Perhaps (I refuse to get on the scale this week until weigh in) when I get on that scale tomorrow and weigh in, I will be surprised and find a loss. But, I feel so defeated that I wonder if whatever loss I happen to have (if I had one at all vs. a gain) will then end up being gained back again the next week.
Where, oh where is that magic formula? How come some people lose their weight so easily? I could almost understand how some, in desperation, turn to liposuction, stomach stapling, drastic measures that could hurt themselves. But, I am not that kind of person.
A woman around my age joined WW about January, I think, she has already way surpassed me. She has great losses week after week, has reached her 10% and is well on her way to goal. Don't get me wrong, I am glad for her, but I look at this woman who comes to the same meeting I go to all the time. She started well after me, she has about the same body type as I do and she appears to have had about the same amount of weight to lose. Yet, I "hover" and she will reach her goal long before I ever can grasp that elusive 10% even. I look at myself in the mirror and I am wondering what it is that this person has that I don't have?
I didn't give up this morning, Ann. I dragged out that new journal to start today. With a heavy sigh, I journalled my breakfast (cheerios, calorie countdown milk, and a half banana) and I will exercise this morning. But, I feel so bummed out and I find myself wondering if I will stay at this weight forever?
(sigh) The old saying I have said to you all, again and again, comes to mind this morning, but I say is quietly and with sadness, "never give up, never surrender". This is just so hard..... This is one place I can be totally honest and that is a nice thing. I want to eat ice cream. I want to have onion rings, I want to have wine, I want to stop weighing and measuring. I'm tired of it, I'm tired of trying so hard with no results. But, I am more tired of the part of me that "cheats" in restaurants and knowingly avoids the program when it suits me to do so.
Next week, my daughter and I agreed to go on CORE together as she will be out of school for summer. Maybe that will help me a bit? But, again, the foods and freedom I am craving are not those wonderful/healthy CORE foods, they are the "bad" and "sinister" cravings that I know all too well will contribute to that hateful scale moving upward. Here is my joke of the day.... envision a new team called "The Weight Watcher Police", they know that I am here and on the brink... they come to my house, they treat me like some kind of cult member gone astray and they duct tape my mouth shut so I can't eat and only take the tape off at mealtimes. The stand over me and MAKE me exercise and they won't let me eat a thing without their express permission. I think I need them! ;)
I shouldn't complain. The average person I see in the grocery store and in Walmart (why are all the really HUGE people in there shopping? Or, is that just a representation of the "norm"?) is much larger than I am and has bulging fat on their body. I can't imagine being that big and never really looked that huge, but I feel that the fat person inside me might try to win over and I might lose this war. It's sad and it's scary.

Morning Everyone...well it looks like the weekend got away from me.
I am in the process of trying to read everything, and will repond later..getting ready for a DR appt.
Anyway---the result from my w/i Saturday - DOWN another 2.5 lbs, unbelieveable......completing 3 full weeks on Core. Going to continue till the end of the month. I'm thinking I will not go back to counting points except the 35 WPA.
This past three weeks has been the best ride I've had in a long time.
I am *actually* lovin' core, this time....weird,huh???
Don't know if I could go back to counting every little point. I DO however journal everyday. I like to look back and see what I had at any given point.
I am following core the way it is written, with the new snack rules too.
Linda I wanted to tell you that SF/FF pudding is not on the list of snacks any longer. When eaten (not with a meal) you have to count the points for it.
The same goes for other core foods that are not on the NEW snack list, that we want to eat other than at a meal.
You don't have to count them IF they are part of your meal, like the SF/FF pudding as dessert at the end of your meal @ home. Just like anyone would have a dessert at the end of their meal at a restaurant.

I'll be back later....to catch up and write.

Have a good day and I'll touch base when I get in.

Linda-I know exactly how you feel. I think my body is the same way...I always feel the same way about people in meetings, too...how come they seem to lose so easily. I have even felt that on here sometimes, too. In the past months when I have been struggling just to keep my head above water there were times when it seemed like every week everyone reported some kind of loss. I have always, my entire life, struggled with my weight...it is hard not to say screw it all, but I don't because I KNOW where I will end up. I WOULD be one of those HUGE people. You know that realistically we wouldn't be able to do that to ourselves, though...we just care too much! Sometimes I do wonder if maybe this is just where my body is meant to be, but I know that can't be the truth...how could my body "want" to be at over 200lbs? Then why is it such a complete and utter struggle? Shouldn't it be easier for a person at my weight to lose the lbs? Apparently not! LOL! The only bit of insight that I have for you is that you need to find some way to enjoy this journey that we are on. I overheard my leader say to someone the other day how much losing weight stinks and it's not fun...I think we need to make it fun, or else when we are at a part of the journey that is not successful, it will be too easy to get discouraged and quit. Also, I think that when we don't enjoy the process, the end result isn't quite as good.

I really wished that you and I lived closer together! I could see us doing some cooking together, ya know? Have you made any new meals lately? Or found any new foods? Maybe changing up your menu would help add some excitement?

I also think that you should really have a talk with your dh about how things are when he is home. If the weekends are when you are really having the majority of your trouble, and it clearly is stressing you out, you need to address it.

Linda / Paige... I think what helped me was I had to STOP thinking I was on a diet so to speak...Doing Core, I am now saying this is my way of eating...much easier. Or this is how I eat now...I have my *treats* yes I do, I just count them in my WPA. I too have had my issues with weight loss. I am and was always tired of *being the one* who had to diet....I hear you both loud and clear. Hang in there...
It is a STRUGGLE for ALL of us...every single day, and it's the choices we make. I made some really bad ones....trust me.


Take care and be well......

Derry: your mood today totally mirrored mine. This morning I woke up and I kept thinking why do I continue to sabotoge myself over the weekends and I kept thinking isn't there an easier way to do this. Then I thought to myself what I am going to do is go to the grocery store and buy things for this week so that I can prepare meals and then I am going to go an excercise and get this thing going. It is hard to stay focused as I am sure everyone of us can relate to this, but you have come so far on your journey and I admire your persistance of doing this for such a long time. As a matter of fact when I went this past week to my meeting there were some people who had lost weight and a good amount of weight I think my leader announced someone who had lost about 25 pounds in about 16 weeks, I looked at my WI chart and noticed that I am coming up to 15 weeks and am actually right back to where I started with all my ups and downs so I felt pretty discouraged. Actually this is probably the reason why I allowed myself to get off track. It's not a jealousy thing with this people it's just one of those things that I say how come they can do it and I can't I guess it's more of a winning vs. losing thing I hate coming in last place. Once again the thought of going to Jenny Craig came in to my head and continues to do so, but I keep having to tell myself that I don't want to be eating out of boxes and I want to be able to enjoy myself with family and friends by knowing who to eat. You are such a great inspiration to me and a great motivator so pick your head up and let get this thing going.

Newlifestyle: my steps were low yesterday as I thought I barley got close to 5,000 but today it is one. I have my excercise planned out and no more lazy days for me it's time to move it to lose it (instead of move it or lose it). I will post my steps again today or early tommorrow. Thanks for giving me this challenge.

L.J: congrats on your sucess:carrot: :carrot:

Hey guys...just have to tell you all...

Not to keep dwelling on my scale drama of last week, but I feel better now... I just put on a pair of jeans that I bought about 4 years ago; they were my favorite style and were being discountinued, so I bought them in 2 sizes down from what I normally wear (I must of had a lot of faith in myself that day! LOL!) I have NEVER been able to wear them...not even zip them up. GUESS WHAT?! I HAVE THEM ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They are tight on my upper thighs, but other than that, they are pretty good! WOOOHOOOO!!!!

Quick stop by - wave and dash!!!!! I SURVIVED!!!!!!! I seriously doubted it about Friday night/Saturday morning, but I did it. I missed WI last week but have started with a whole new purpose and drive this morning. How quickly those bad food habits come back. Just wanted to wave and say that I'm still around and I'll stop by tonight from home after I have a chance to catch up on what everyone else has been up to.

MY BABY IS GRADUATED!!!!!

LJ, thanks for the interpretation on in between meal snacks with CORE. They changed the rules when I was back on Flex. I would have gotten it, when going back on it again.
Paige, thanks for the support. I do need to have a chat with DH as well, I guess. I hate to burst his bubble as he is only home weekends and it's just so hard. He lives in a hotel during the week and denies himself so much during the week, that he truly needs treats. BUT, I just can't go along that path with him - at least not all the time.
I feel a bit better this afternoon than I did this morning. I got on the scale, which is exactly what I said I wouldn't do. But, it was a bit lower. Who knows what will happen, though, by tomorrow afternoon as my weight fluctuates so much from day to day.
I wish we lived closer too, Paige. We both have some similar problems, in a way. I would also watch your little girls for you so you could go to meetings. It would be my pleasure. Guess it would be a bit difficult considering we are about a five hour ride away.
LJ, I could have written exactly what you said a few months ago when I was on CORE. However, the "honeymoon" phase of it wore thin for me and I was really thrown off and not counting those 35 points. I think the 35 points were actually turning into 45 or 50 points? I don't even know. I got really tired, also, of not eating what everyone else in the house was eating. But, if my daughter does it with me, maybe it will be easier? By the way, I was really positive and happy on CORE for about three months before things went downhill. I then turned to flex about three or four months ago and now I find myself really bummed out again. So, I do need a change.
I want to Walmart this morning and actually glanced (not carefully) at the book section to see if there was some new motivational book on the shelves, nothing.
Haylo, thanks for your encouraging words. It is so hard to sit there in meeting after meeting and hear others gleefully announcing their weight losses. I look around at these people and I keep wondering what it is that makes it so hard for me. I'm just as good a person as they are, right? But, the body I have is the way it is. I have to try. I'm glad you mentioned your issues and I am equally glad that Paige mentioned her own feelings when people here make announcements about their losses. When you are not losing yourself, or losing at the rate you feel everyone else is, it gets harder and harder. I wonder if WW has done studies on their "drop outs" and how they were feeling. I wonder if they need to come back with a new or different approach with the long termers who are struggling.
Paige, what a great NSV to report as well, look how far you've come to be able to wear those jeans today. I'm sure that just having them on for a little while (you'll probably end up uncomfortable and take them off, I know the feeling) will make you feel so accomplished. I'm glad for you.
Laura, glad you made it through the last few weeks. I wondered if we were ever going to here from you again! I also miss Ginny, it's been a very long time since she posted as well as our Hawaiian friend, what was her name?
I keep thinking, today, (you don't know how close I was to giving up today, I really was close) about what it is that keeps us coming back and not giving up. What is it that makes us turn away from our WW plans and go back to all the bad habits. It's so hard, it really is. How very much I admire those who can do this. Have to say this too, how very jealous I am of those who can just do this and so very quickly.
Do not covet they neighbor's weight loss..... hmmm, sorry God! I need to stop thinking about other people's losses and how fast they happen and concentrate on my own stuff. I am better off than I was a year ago, after all.

Slow and steady wins the race... I may not the fastest weight loss person, it could take me two years to get it all off, I guess? But, maybe by the time I truly get where I want to be, the fast weight loss people who "beat" me might be back at the meetings with all their weight back on?????
I still feel bummed out, though.
Thanks, everyone, for being here.

Hey Linda...I also was thinking about Noelle earlier today and wondering how she was. After reading your post, I decided to go back to one of our threads from earlier in the year and see if I could find one of her posts so I could send her a PM to see how she was doing. The thread that I chose was from back in Feb, and the very first thing I read was something that you had written to me. I thought it was kind of ironic as it is fitting for YOU right now! You wrote...

Paige.... I'm sending you are virtual hug.... ((((HUG)))). Sounds like you've had a rough week. If you look at my favorite movie quote from my signature line, "never give up, never surrender", this is a time when you need to say that to yourself and use it as your "mantra".

Have you ever gone back and re-read some of our old posts? It's kind of interesting to see what we were doing, feeling, and thinking.

I actually have gone back from time to time and read our posts, but not recently. It would be good, I think.
We all have ups and downs with this. Not giving up during those times is so important. If it were not for you guys and my daughter, I probably wouldn't be "here" right now.
I need to remind myself.
Thanks for the quote!
Linda

Hello everyone,
I think it has just been one of those days. I have struggled to stay on plan today and to walk. I did walk 9,580 steps today so far that is only because I am in a friendly challenge with Haylo. I am so thankful we have this challenge right now Haylo or I wouldn't have walked today. Linda, if you took the weekend off from WW could you get back on track? I know when I am having bad days I go back and read the previous posts, and I always find inspirations there. I wonder if Paige and Linda became ww email buddies if that would help. I hope everyone has a great night. I will post more later. I should check out core to see if I can do it.
Take Care
Ann

Ann, I'm "on track" again as of today, but starving and still sad.
I went on my treadmill and used my weights and did crunches even if my heart wasn't in it.
Perhaps tomorrow will bring a better attitude.

Linda, wow you truly are amazing, you are on track...good for you. I know I have lost weight but yet I can't' seem to get beyond the amount I have to lose, I just have to overlook that and try and say I am doing okay. Yes I could have done better but I didn't so I think I should just move on. I get too focused on that numbers on the scale rather than the NSVs like Paige's where she can fit into those jeans...way to go Paige. Linda you have lost more than you still need to lose therefore you are past your halfway mark.
Remember baby steps. I know you won't surrender and you will do it. I am sorry you are sad. Does your husband have an Employee Assistance Program where he works, if so, maybe they have an on line counselling service. I know it is hard when we are sad. I know that my friends wanted to do this journey with me but they have all dropped out and once again I do it alone, only this time I have all of you and I am thankful for that. I look forward to all of your posts, they truly inspire me.
Paige way to go fitting in those jeans...yeah
Laura, welcome, I hope you have a great day.
L.J. congratulations on your weight loss.
Hey Linda when you go on core can you journal so I can try it too. I always thought I couldn't do it successfully, I want to try.
Have a great day all.
Take Care
Ann