OK - I'm seeing the lap band surgeon for the first time tomorrow. This is something I have been considering for at least four years. I have vacillated back and forth about it, but when my mother had her second bypass surgery last year - she was 61 - I succumbed to the logic of getting one.
I have developed the craziest fear, though. I am terrified of going through life without Coca Cola. Isn't that insane?
Now, since I'm manic depressive it could be argued that insanity is to be expected, but I can't figure this out. Granted, I drink a lot of the damn things. The only thing I can figure out is that since I am a recovering alcoholic and addict (and an ex-smoker) giving up the Cokes is just one more thing being taken away from me. The issue has kind of grown out of proportion. I wonder if the Cokes are symbolizing the idea that my eating and weight have gotten totally out of control and I will have to make some drastic changes to postpose my family curse - early death from heart disease.
I've researched the lap-band for several years, so there isn't anything there that is unknown or frightening to me. The thought of surgery doesn't bother me. Since I decided on a lap-band I'm not concerned about my medication absorption. My husband supports me 100% and my kids are older, so that's not a concern. I work for a company that won't be a problem where insurance and time off are concerned.
You would think I would be rolling in clover.
Nope. Can't get those damn Cokes out of my mind.