Originally Posted by Ready2ShedLBS:
However, I dont believe I looked fine before.

That's how I feel too! I don't think I look "fine" now... I am fat and I do NOT think it is beautiful; I think it is ugly and I want rid of it! So if people notice I look a lot better I will be thrilled! :) I am just now starting to get the "you're looking good" type comments as my weight loss is still not that noticeable; but hey, 29 pounds is 29 pounds!! :) I'll take all the compliments I can get LOL.

Misti....29 pounds is awesome!!! have you put pics of you now together with pics of you before??? i did last night. i got a pic back from my "date night" and from last year and "I" can actually see what people are talking about. I agree i have a lot further to go too... but i finally am seeing what others are seeing!!! I can't wait to take another pic of me at 155 and put it together with the 196 and 171 pic and see how far i am coming!!!

soon, i'll scan the pics on the computer and let everyone else see what i am starting to see. i just don't have a computer at home anymore and my computer here at work doesn't have a scanner. so i'll have to borrow someone's here at work to scan and email them to my computer so i can upload them to the net....man...sounds like a lot of work huh??? lol :)

Yah Lumi it may be a lot of work but it will be worth it! I can't WAIT to see your pictures!! That is one of my favorite things here at 3FC, to see people's progress photos and celebrate with them!

Yes I did find an absolutely horrid "before" picture which someone took at work.... yikes! And at the beginning of April I took my camera to church with me and asked a close friend to sneak into a back hallway and take front and side pictures; will do that once a month or so! I hate them but I know I will be sorry later if I don't take them. LOL I am NOT brave enough to POST them here yet LOL. But even looking at them myself is an encouragement... as I can see a very big difference especially in the boobs which is really a terrible problem area! The are SO big it is not safe for me to evan have reduction surgery until I lose a lot of weight and reduce them, as it would involve total reconstruction rather than just the normal reduction surgery. Yikes! It is a nightmare living with them! But I have already gone down 3 band sizes (!!) and can tell a big difference!

But yes the 29 pounds feels SO much lighter; and even though I have so far to go I can do so much more now than before!!!

I like the bar my friend Kathy and I go to. Nobody there knows I used to be fat. Which is good because I don't have to deal with the whispering from people saying stuff to everyone else, like, "Wow, see that girl over there? She used to be really fat."

People can be very cruel and insensitive.When I lost weight years ago everyone hovered over me doing nice things for me.Buying me Diet Soda,making sweet comments etc they wouldn't have done when I was"fat"..who cares what others think really I mean we all have flaws and imperfections and those idgits who make comments aren't perfect either.If I hadn't spent years worrying what others thought I would have better self-esteem and self-confidence about myself today.

My sister is the ultimate champ with these back handed compliments. My favorite was when she'd say "your legs really don't have much hail-damage for as big as they are". Also, "you have such a pretty face, if'd you'd just lose some weight." Now that I've lost 80 lbs. she said 2 days ago, " I think you've went a little over-board and are too skinny now". I just laugh and think, She's so damn jealous that she can't stand it that I'm smaller than her now. She actually was feeling my spine to point out that she thinks I'm too Bony.

Arrrghhh people can be so hard to please... if you are not too fat, now you are too skinny! :) I agree laughing it off is the best approach.

Thanks Misti, she is known as the Biatch of the family and rightfully so, but I love her to death. She told her husband that I only weigh 130 the other day . I think she did this so she can convince him that she weighs 150 still. Which isn't even close to the truth. LOL

Ready that is so awful. I really dont understand people who dont think about how what they say sounds to others... I mean, I dont think, regardless of the subject matter, that I have ever said anything so awfully rude to someone even by accident.

I once overheard this conversation in the kitchen of a restaurant in which I was dining: "I heard you used to date "PeeB". "Yeah, she actually used to be goodlooking before she got so fat" "yeah?" "yeah, I mean she looked totally different dude you cant even imagine".
This was a difference of maybe 120lbs to 140. I mean thats a weight gain, but come on. Ugh I was so embarrassed, and the guy who said it came out in the same breath and continued to wait on me all cheerful. I just wanted to disappear into my chair.

But thats a little different... but then later I dropped some of the weight, and I went into a bar and the bartender said inappropriately loudly "OH MY GOD you have lost a LOT of weight" and I said "thank you" and she said "NO I MEAN A LOT OF WEIGHT, OH MY GAWD, WOW I just cant believe it, OH MY GOD, WOW" - I had maybe gone from 140 to 130, it wasnt like I was emaciated. It was just rude and made a spectacle of me. A guy at the bar snickered meanly and covered his mouth.
Some people are just mean.... some are just insensitive... I dont know if I like it more when people notice or when people dont... but I WOULD like acknowledgement of it at least, cause you want to know your hard work has made you look better enough that its apparent!!

I think the way a compliment is given should depend on how well you know the person, their personality and weight loss history.

I know a couple of my friends work so hard on their weight loss, if I go up to them and say, "Wow, you look like you've lost a lot of weight!" that's an encouragement because they don't always see the results the same way as someone who doesn't see you every single day. But I still know them well enough to know what their journey has been and what an accomplishment it is to finally get there. They want people to notice... and to comment about it.

But for other people who I might not know so well, I usually just say, "Wow, you look great!" and leave it at that.

I know I take compliments differently depending on who gives them too. If they're already someone I know to be an insincere person, I try to ignore it, good or bad. My husband and friends are very supportive and will give me both compliments and criticisms. And this is going to sound bad, but the compliments I take the best are from people I might not see that often. If they say that I look like I've lost a ton of weight, I know it's because they can notice a difference, not because they're just trying to make me feel better because the majority of them don't know I'm working out and dieting.