642...

I really wanted to nap on the sofa this evening. However, I went for my last walk, did some laundry, and went on a bike ride. My bike helmet is 16 years old. It is so old the foam pads have degraded and for a while I was wearing bits of them on my forehead after a ride. Things are going okay and my appetite has be very reasonable lately.

On-plan
exercise
calorie deficit
ended fast (13 hr)

641...

Had a very tough day emotionally but managed to stay on track.

On-plan
exercise
calorie deficit
Bonus- ended extra fast (17 hr)

640...

Man! This is a long hard slog. I am very hungry but I really want to be healthier. The key to being healthier is to lose weight so I shouldn't eat any more tonight. I went back to the recreation center to exercise today. It was the first time I had been there since March. They have a whole new process set up. You need to make a reservation for a window of time and you can show up any time in that window. In addition, you need to specify the type of appointment, swim or cardio/weights. They close the place down and clean between the windows. They have 100 slots open. Including my family, 15 of them were filled for the window we signed up for. We overlapped with nearly all of the other visitors. Due to a state mandate, we had to wear masks while exercising. I did okay because the mask I wore was not as thick as many of them out there. There is an training technique that involves wearing a mask but it isn't for me.

All of the exercise machines were moved and separated by six feet. Before Covid, there were two elliptical machines that I have a strong preference for because of my feet issues. I was only able to find one today. They may have gotten rid of the other. I was able to do my usual 20 minutes without any issues. I added this on top of all the other exercise I have been doing. Must get through this plateau!!

On-plan
exercise
calorie deficit

639...

The scale was brutal today! Despite my efforts and working harder, it was up 4 pounds since the beginning of the month. I overate a lot today. It was a combination of things. Some of it was energy seeking behavior to try to combat the fatigue. I definitely over did it yesterday exercise wise and have been exhausted today. I even took a three and a half hour nap. The other part of it was simple frustration. I am so tired of always limiting myself. I was doing my best to stay on track but missed something in my tally. When I added it in properly, I found I was already over for the day. Unfortunately, I basically gave up in that moment and ate what I wanted to. Tomorrow is another day. I also have sketched out a rough eating plan for the week.

OFF PLAN

638...

Did not do very well today at all. I even planned out all of my food last night. However, things changed and I did not adjust well. With so few positive results, it is easy to run off plan. It seems like it doesn't matter even though it does. My appetite was uncooperative today. I haven't slept well the last couple of nights and I am definitely falling into energy seeking behavior. Hope to sleep well tonight!

OFF PLAN

637...

Is it Festivus? I have a grievance that needs airing. Honestly, it is really about me. Sometimes, I get strong negative feelings about something that is inconsequential and generally kindly meant. I'm not sure what to do with myself when this happens as I tend to spend too much time focusing on it.

On-Plan
exercise
calorie deficit
end fast (14 hr)

EDIT: I just planned out my meals and snacks for tomorrow. I rarely do this but really want to get solidly back on track. I did this on Monday but got off-track pretty quickly.

636...

So far on plan for today but just barely. Will likely be off plan before bedtime...

635...

So a very strange thing happened to me on my last walk, the longest one of the day. Towards the very end things seemed brighter, my vision became sharper, and I had a bit more energy. It was as though some switch flipped on. I really wish I knew what made this difference. The vision improvements are still with me but I am tired after my bike ride. We'll see how tomorrow goes...

On-Plan
exercise
calorie deficit
end fast (14 hr)

634...

Well, I may have made a calorie deficit since there was extra guess work in the calories today. I wish I had a discreet scale attachment for my phone to take to restaurants. It would help me better understand how much I am eating. My best guess showed that I am over my calorie limit. It will be interesting to see what the keto test strip says. I wanted to eat more this evening but managed to cut myself off.

Interestingly, my vision is still better since yesterday. Going to go back to the rec center tomorrow.

Exercise
Calorie Overage

633...

Holding steady. We shall see if I can catch a break on the scale tomorrow. Today went really fast. My friend who successfully did keto to get to her goal weight came over for dinner. She has been doing keto for two years. Her husband started in January of this year and is happy with his progress. Interestingly, her friend who introduced her to keto had stop doing it and gained weight back. Her friend is going to start back up with it. Unfortunately, keto is out for me as I cannot cut out huge swaths of particular foods.

Exercise
Calorie Deficit

632...

So I held steady on the scales all week and then on weigh-in day my weigh popped up. Once I start creating a steady weight loss, this won't feel so defeating. I have a working theory as to why the first month of lock down produced a good weight loss for me. I think it my have been from de-conditioning (losing muscle) since my overall exercise plan changed so much.

Now that I can go back to the rec center, I can work back up to my previous program. Also, I think there is a training regime out there that incorporates wearing a mask (pre-Covid). I want to look it up and better understand if such training exists, the purpose and technique. Since I have to wear a mask while exercise may be I can squeeze a real benefit out of it. A new community exercise facility is opening closer to us next month. They tore down the old facility and built the new one on the same site. The drawings looked amazing especially compared to the old facility. Although very well maintained, the old facility was a bit cramped and dark.

Rest Day
Calorie Overage

631...

Let's talk triathlons. So for a long time, I thought training for triathlons would help me lose weight. It didn't. I did 15 triathlons. Not only did I do 15 triathlons, I did them carting around at least 50 extra pounds with asthma and bum feet. I think it is fair to say I have some grit and tenacity. I daydreamed about creating an equalizer triathlon where all of the participants had to match the physical impediments of the participant in the worst shape. If I were the said participant, the other racers would need to add a 50 pound pack, wear a tight belt to restrict their breathing, and wear stiff shoes with a small pointy pebble in each one. Very few people, nay no-one, would sign up for such an event.

Along they way there was a transition in my mind set. When I first started them, I was fully of self defeating thoughts and would ruminate while I was training on my weight and lambasting myself for not taking care of my body. After the first have dozen or so, it transition to being pleased with myself for having the determination to complete these events. Often I was the one with the worst completion time. I deemed myself the morale entrant- everyone would have a better completion time than me so they could say they beat someone.

My feet are so bad while training the 'run' portion, I would walk my bike. I wanted it with me because I was never sure my feet would cooperate enough for me to get back to my car. People would comment on it all the time. In addition, I would carry extra shoes with me during the race for the 'run' portion to try and find some relief by switching shoes mid race. Sometimes I would have to stop because after the pain, my feet would get numb and I needed to get the circulation back before I could continue. In general, I was on the low side of average for the swim and the bike. However, the run portion was my nemesis. I was never able to break the 22 minute mile. I was so slow they even closed the course on me once because they thought everyone was in. After that I learned to finagle my way into the earlier heats and would always tell the first water station to make sure I was in before they closed the course. My husband would station himself at the finish line to further proctor them.

I stopped doing triathlons because it was a distraction from losing weight and thus significantly improving my health. I wish I were making more progress on that. Saying I maintained a weight loss plateau for four months midway to final weight loss goal doesn't have quite the same bragging rights as I finished a triathlon.

Exercise
Calorie Deficit

630...

So when I would finish a triathlon, I would not only say 'Yay, I did it', I would say to my husband 'I did it. Did you see me?'. That's a bit odd to add in the 'did you see me?' bit. I'm sure it means something psychologically but I am just not sure what.

Heading back to the rec center tomorrow night. I had to make an appointment to go so now I feel committed. This will be the second time this week. Trying to figure out if I should back off some of the other exercise. I really don't want because it is really important. I was going four times a week before things were shut down. I'd like to get back to that. I was also ice skating two days a week. That will be harder to get back on track. The rinks are open but only for private lessons and something else...maybe team practice. It will cost me about $400 a month for private lessons which is too rich for me.

Exercise
Calorie Deficit

629....

Three walks, one gym visit and one bike ride- tah dah! I would like to do another triathlon. There are several still on the race calendar. However, the couple I clicked on were deferred to next year or were showing as sold out. One caught my eye- they switched it to virtual. You do the distance on a self selected course for the required distances and report your times. I think I may sign up for that one. At the very least, I will get a t-shirt out of it.

Exercise
Calorie Deficit

628...

I weigh a lot in an effort to not weigh a lot. Shall I explain? To help me understand the calories I am eating, I have found it easiest to weigh out servings using a kitchen scale. I also weigh myself pretty much twice a day. So far it is not helping me not weigh a lot.

I am struggling to understand what is going on. I've some how managed to lower my calories consistently and I am being more active. However, the scale is not budging.


Exercise - on-plan
Calorie Deficit - on-plan